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Original poster

August 08 - We three kings of orient are, one in a taxi one in a car..

929 replies

steaknife · 12/12/2009 23:22

...one on a scooter beeping his hooter, smoking a fat cigar

Apologies to the goodly and the good amongst us.

OP posts:
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SazzlesOnASled · 23/12/2009 19:58

Marvellous steaky and i can just imagine him googling 'brass neck' . You could add 'and if getting to know Izzy is that important to you, then you could try coming and living in England, as moving countries was what i was prepared to do for you'

Shame about the parcel No1. I just spotted on DH's email that my bikini has been delivered, so now i get that and all the other pressies we bought yesterday too [yipeee]!!!!

steakyroastingonanopenfire · 23/12/2009 20:01

Thank you Sazz
I did actually say, again, that I thought he should seriously consider coming to live in UK.

dizzycringles · 23/12/2009 20:07

steaky you should be neither or - well done you lady well done, about time too, useless eejit of an exdh - he's now realising what he's missing and trying to make out its because of you [idiot!]

no1putsbabyinthecorner · 23/12/2009 20:08

Hey all quiet and asleep. half an hour not bad really.
pertelote how are you enjoying your time off work so far?
oopslol at the slush puppy.
I ordered some last minute stuff for dh from Amazon and had no problem, last one arrived this am.

Dh had ordered from Next!

I really must go and tidy all the chaos dcs had a mad half hour before bed.

oopsandbabyJesusinacoconut · 23/12/2009 20:11

GO STEAKY GO About time you stood up for yourself! Now go and pur yourself a big glass of wine

hows the ears Dizzy?

Sazzles - you have done well on the pressie front. I have wheedled out of DH that he I am getting a few little pressies tomorrow as he wants to get me some new sunnies for holiday but needs me and my eyes to do that.

no1putsbabyinthecorner · 23/12/2009 20:13

x post all that lot.
steaky well done you lady. I am afraid I would have been a lot harsher than that, but you were straight to the point which is fantastic.
How very dare he say that.

sazzles you lucky girl.

dh just text to say he so sorry that I will not have anything to open now.
(I cought him looking at some slippers (them boot type ones) to replace mine as looking a bit worn
So I knew they were in the order. No idea what else though.
I know he will not want to go shopping tomorow before he goes to work.

I don't mind though we agreed not to buy for each other as we wnt out instead.

dizzycringles · 23/12/2009 20:15

oops easy on the pompoms lady - we've TS for all that eager jumping about

right ear still the same but resting now whilst the kids are in bed - DH now complaining of similar though - thank you for asking

SazzlesOnASled · 23/12/2009 20:17

I know oops, i am very lucky, and I think DH has bought my Total Immersion swimming lesson (involving a weekend away next year). I hope he is not too disappointed with his pressies

Well done on the speedy bedtime no1, mine are normally worse when overtired, although tend to sleep longer the night following a late night, so hopefully you will get a lie in

SazzlesOnASled · 23/12/2009 20:19

No1 GAP have some lovely slipper boots in if he might be passing that way

Ah, competitive illing from mrDizz. I expected more of him than that tbh

oopsandbabyJesusinacoconut · 23/12/2009 20:21

MrDizzy BEHAVE!!!!

dizzycringles · 23/12/2009 20:25

he has been told Oops and he no longer loves you tiffin lady

no1putsbabyinthecorner · 23/12/2009 20:26

I was thinking earlier a lie in would be wonderful. Me and dh walk around like zombies.

You have done well sazzles on the pressie front. I am sure dh will be happy with his.

My dh went crazy the other day as I drove in the snow to deliver my dbro, sil and kids gifts and birthday stuff for dbro, and he gave me a unwrapped tub of celebrations.

I didn't think anything of it, but dh went one one for about an hour, saying he was disgusted,and if his brother didn't get our dcs anything he would have gone mad.

He shouted at me for putting too much thought into the stuff for dnephews and dniece,and was disgusted to hear that I had asked what they wanted and sil had told me the eldest was getting mixing decks so I got him some dj lights) and middle would like something for her new bedroom. Maybe I shouldn't have told dh that.I wouldn't dream of taking it out on the dcs though.

steakyroastingonanopenfire · 23/12/2009 20:27

no1 I want slippers but don't think I'm getting any. Though a shop in town has some very festive red moccassins.

Himselfs first email was this:

"I knew you wanted to get back to Englang but i can t help thinking you could have wait a year so Izzy would know her father. I am not sure a skype connexion is going to help that. Nothing is going to help that, i am just gonna be a ghost in her memory's background and that a painfull thought. I have made effort and changes in my life so you two had a living here."

His second email was this:

"Small precision : The way life has turn for all of us is both of our responsability. Would i dare reminding you the numerous crisis you made me endure, the last one being the one when i was visiting you in UK 1 month ago. Separating from you was my decision, you and Izzy going away was yours. I too stick to what i said, you could have wait a little so Isabelle would know her father."

I was fecking furious. The email I sent was several drafts later. I couldn't not reply but finding the right balance of sticking up for myself but not making a new argument. pffft again.

dizzycringles · 23/12/2009 20:30

twat!

no1putsbabyinthecorner · 23/12/2009 20:32

steaky I am not wanting to have a dig at him here as I know you are suffering enough already, but what effort did he make for you all exactly. iirc he criticised your parenting skills an awful lot, tried to override all your desicions and natural instincts as a mother too. and you did an amazing job trying to keep it all together.
Sorry if that wasn't supportive enough for you, but I really feel for you.

dizzycringles · 23/12/2009 20:34

sorry steaky, I did just want to have a dig at him

no1putsbabyinthecorner · 23/12/2009 20:35

I am not getting the hidying tidying done ladies.

I have started on the brazil nuts and just opened a diam bar.
I was saving it till I had finsished cleaning, but thought if I eat it now then work after.

SazzlesOnASled · 23/12/2009 20:36

I think it is still all very raw atm, and break-ups never easy, without the added complication of different countries. Yes, it does take two to make a relationship work or not work, but that doesn't excuse him being a git and leaving no realistic option other than for you to return to the UK.
He needs to grow up and work out how he can make his relationship with DD work and not just blame/have a go at you

I second Dizz* [twat]

no1putsbabyinthecorner · 23/12/2009 20:37

actualy steaky I jus re read his second email and I also have to say TWAT and on your behalf.

SazzlesOnASled · 23/12/2009 20:38

I think that is the carrot and stick approach no1 and i applaud the use of the carrot on yourself

oopsandbabyJesusinacoconut · 23/12/2009 20:40

Steaky - SO you had to live alone in a foreign country with a baby where you could barely speak the language, with no support because he didn't want to be a family? I echo Dizzy TWAT

cyteen · 23/12/2009 20:46

"i am just gonna be a ghost in her memory's background"

Boo fucking hoo.

Honestly, tell him from all of us that he is being a twat and an unimaginative one at that. I am very impressed at your restraint steak, you are a true lady. He needs to grow the fuck up before he can call himself a father.

on your behalf, although not angry enough to eschew the festive hat (it is the season of goodwill, after all).

hotter drunk at 5.59 indeed! Picture me doing a cat's bum mouth Well done miss, am of your friend time in the nicest way.

Had a nice lazy day at home today, then basically skated up to DS's nursery and back at pick-up time. There is a massive uphill walk either way, how I avoided falling on my arse I'll never know. DS had NO sleep today Having too much fun chasing the girls around, the little tinker. Needless to say the short period between getting home and bedtime was 'eventful'.

no1putsbabyinthecorner · 23/12/2009 20:49

pmsl at cat bum face.
Are you feeling any better cyteen lovey?

no1putsbabyinthecorner · 23/12/2009 20:50

cat bum mouth even.

cyteen · 23/12/2009 20:57

I am feeling better thanks no1 (at bloody last). Just got aching knees and back from hauling my wandering boy around. What a short time it is from tenderly cradling that fragile brand new baby in your gentle embrace, to blithely shoving them under one arm while you get the shopping done

How is your back feeling? Perhaps your DH can rub some Deep Heat on it later...

Oh Buckets I forgot to say re. blanket anxiety. What I am afraid of? Well, that he'll somehow manage to tangle himself in it and choke himself. Just like I'm constantly scared that the teat part of the dummy will pop out and choke him in his sleep, or that he'll trip over and smash his skull to bits, or that he'll just suddenly stop breathing one day, or any one of a million other things that are pretty unlikely but still keep my teeth grinding in the middle of the night. I'm a really really really anxious person. I wish I wasn't, but I am. There will never be a time when I stop expecting the worst to happen to him, because in my experience that shit happens with no discrimination as to how much you love someone.