NOV 09 - once the lights are out and the last baby has arrived safe and fine, see you here on cloud nine!

[Broodzilla]

I've just realized we're now under the "being a parent" header. I've got stage freight!

also that should say i am the one relaxed about her routine
impossible to type with one hand!

lansinoh and medela make good breastpads but i do like the boots disp ones too

I'm still in maternity bottoms too Koumak. I was so looking forward to shopping for some nice new clothes after having the bambino but I'll just depress myself even more if I have to buy bigger sizes!

I had a really good nights sleep last night- 7 hours straight! Dh got up and did 2 middle of night feeds so I could catch up, bless him. He does surprise me sometimes!

Anya has been feeding loads today, almost every 1 and a half hours! I think she's making up for the drop in her feeds when she was poorly. Hopefully she will get back ito the 3 hourly feeding, I could cope fine with that!

scarlotti, I have to change both of us very often because of either lots of vomit which smells (she has actually vomit in her chubby neck folds, I think, as she always smells a bit of vomit and it is almost impossible to clean her there) or lots of milk which is usually just uncomfortably wet. I went through 4 bras (well, I reused the first) in 24 hours. I wet them during bf or for example at night because those pads are just never in the right place.

Paula had lots of spots in face and chest. On the chest, they were apparently because of overheating (I think because she is always sleeping on someone's chest). In the face it seems to be the normal ones due to the hormones. And the skin is rather dry too. The GP prescribed me E45 as a moisturizer. I'm only cleaning her with water. I think soap makes everything worse.

ursi I had to use two pads on each breast when I was bf. One of them I would stuff right down at the bottom of my bra. That seemed to work reasonably well.

Also, I have been using Aqueous cream for dry skin. Anya has it on her hands and legs. You can buy the cream in boots and its safe from birth.

ursi didn't realise it was so much she was bringing back up. Ioan seems to go through muslins at quite a rate from what he brings up.

koumak posseting is just the term they use for bringing back up milk after a feed!
of your 11pm - 6 or 8am sleep!! I thought I was doing well when he slept from 10 - 3!

Was supposed to be going out tonight with some people I used to work with - my only sort of xmas do. As I was so poorly last night I'm only popping along for an hour or so. Wouldn't bother at all but really want to catch up with them. Am probably being stupid as am not 100%, ho hum.
Will be back home for 8ish though as need more sleep!

koumak I am in maternity bottoms still too, it's depressing isn't it? I have a christening to go to in a few weeks and I have nothing to wear and the thought of buying something just depresses me!

of everyones babies sleeping for more than 2 hours at night! Millie wakes several times in the night for a feed still and last night would only sleep by my boob so we co-slept all night. I woke up with an achey hip due to being in one position so long, not had that since pregnancy!

Millie has had some spots on her face too, think it's quite common at there age and thankfully they are clearing up now.

scarlotti hope you feel better and enjoy your night out tonight, even if it is only for a few hours!

Sorry been AWOL. Am a crying, sleepless mess and I can't cope!! Well, I am trying, but Sam is not sleeping at night, and I just haven't been able to sleep in the day because he feeds so blinking often. But wanted to say hi.

BBL how was the christmas shopping trip?

Am impressed with all of you who have managed to establish some kind of routine. We have none, at all. We have still only managed two baths!!

Is it normal to cry all the time?! DH seems to think I am mad. I just can't help it, and sometimes it is totally out of the blue, like just when I look at him (baby, not DH!).

Don't worry about anything if you can, katster , all bets are off in the first weeks and you can cry/bath/do whatever as often or little as you want.
Esme only had her first bath yesterday, but she wasn't dirty either, so what the heck. I'm just trying to keep up with soiled diapers, the temperature thing, and feeding, that's enough.

Oh, today I thought I could get a nap in, but after 5 min of blissful silence both baby and toddler started to bawl on the top of their lungs. Sigh. Was really really hard to crawl out of bed and those comfy flannel Pjs. My eyes are watering, I'm so tired. Surely this can't be adaptive? I mean, put me in a jungle and a saber-toohted tiger'll eat me before I can lift my head to look at him.

My doctor said yesterday I'd probably have lots of internal tearing bc Esme was so big. He also said the epi will take up to three months for healing entirely. so I don't have to worry about weird feelings for that long. Anything helps.

TOK, thanks, I'm going to try that tonight.
Katster, I cried out of the blue too... or for stupid reasons like having to change the nappy again even if we just changed it 5min ago, and obviously you have to cry when you look at your sweet baby. (I would worry if you did it when looking at DH ) Try to relax and sleep as much as you can over the weekend and let your husband do everything!... except the feeding.

I've got Toby attached to me asleep in his sling. It's like being pregnant again!!

Christmas shopping went well - got presents for all my female relatives... the men are too hard.

Katster it is normal to cry all the time - I cry every day. Having a baby is a HUGE change in your life, especially the first.

katster hang in there. You'll be OK. It's such an emotional upheaval. I've had many crying episodes. I'm sure it's normal. I find it really helps to get out for a walk even if it's just round the block with the pram. I was bawling wandering around our local park last week when Isaac's colic was playing up big time. I'm glad nobody saw me as probably looked like a right nutter!

BBL I;m also sat with baby in sling. Isaac spends nearly all day in his. It's a godsend but my back is starting to suffer a little. We had a mini breakthrough tonight when Isaac slept in his moses basket for about an hour and 20mins. Long enough for me to cook some food for tea, which is great as DH is out tonight.

I can't be arsed with xmas shopping. Will hopefully get inspired next week.

Isaac's got his jabs on Thurs, which I'm dreading and I've got to have a GTT to see if my diabetes has gone

Kaster crying at everything is perfectly normal, especially when you're so tired. Can you have a day or two in bed with Sam? Don't focus on sleeping, just relax in bed feeding him as and when and only leave for the loo. Get your DH to make you a packed lunch so you keep your strength up. You might be surprised at how many little spurts of 30 mins sleep you can get, and how much better you'll feel afterwards.

Have been to meet my friends, and it was so lovely! Left a bottle of expressed milk and Ioan guzzled the lot, and I'm not bursting to feed so that's great. Was so nice to feel like me again for a few hours, instead of Mum or Wife.
So tired now though I could sleep standing up!

Before I launch into "Am I Being Unreasonable":

I hear you on the jungle and tiger. What was Mother Nature thinking, making us hormonal exhausted wrecks?

I was quite appalled to learn that baby vomit is possett as I only learned to make a gorgeous dessert this summer with the same name.

Lukas is 8 weeks and I'm only now getting back into pre-bump jeans but with a definite muffin-top, so you're not allowed to worry about it yet! ;)

Ok... Please excuse me...

DH announced he'd be out til tomorrow PM on his bike. I asked him (in light of the week Lukas and I have had) to please stay home this weekend. He wanted me to explain why I needed him here (because I'm exhausted, but also because I want to try to get Lukas into a routine and I think that'll need us to work in 'shifts' as I'm too tired to do it properly on my own) and I did explain, but also said that I really felt that asking should be enough - I shouldn't have to explain or justify it.

He offered to go riding locally for a few hours, but said that if I really wanted him to not do any riding at all, all weekend, I should have given him more notice and not tell him on a Friday night when he's been looking forward to it all week. He suggested Wednesday as a deadline... I pointed out that Wednesday was the day Lukas had his jabs and I was a sobbing mess. Then I asked him to leave the bedroom before I lose my temper.

I think I've completely switched off. I'm not sad. I haven't got the energy to argue. I'd feel disappointed, but it's not like I didn't see it coming.

erm, just realized that last paragraph reads like I'm more than slightly unhinged... I'm not, but I am tired and not doing myself any good by staying awake and winding myself up about it. Lukas is sleeping peacefully, so I should try to get him to sleep on his wedge instead of my chest and get some rest myself...

Scarlotti well done for getting out! It's good to remember we still exist as us too!

Katster I really like Scarlotti's idea. Apparntly that's also really good with an unsettled baby, make a nest in bed for the weekend, strip off you and Sam and have lots of skin to skin contact. Big hugs.

Brood obviously it goes without saying you are not being unreasonable!

I have a book called babyproofing your marriage - great read. One of the things it suggests for first babies, is to arrange a weekend away (or just a night) at around 3 months where you leave baby with Dad. This is to indoctrinate them into the reality of life with a baby, without Mum there to do most of the work. By the end of the weekend he will be desperate for you to come home and will have an appreciation of just how hard it is looking after a newborn.

The bonus for you too is a full night's sleep!

Oh Brood, you are certainly not being unreasonable. Adapting to a new baby is hard work, for both you and dh but you need as much support as you can get, not having to explain the reasons for wanting your dh there at the weekend to help out. I don't think men understand how hard it is looking after a baby 24/7 as they can see it as us being home all day being able to do what we want so when it's the weekend they then want some time to themselves. What they don't realise is that being at home 24/7 with a baby means you get NO time to yourself and are tired and stressed from it all.
Katster crying all the time is normal! All these hormones that are changing and roaming around our bodies can do strange things to us! I often cry for one thing or another. The other night Leah was crying (colic I think) and I was here on my own after putting dd1 to bed and I just couldn't deal with it. I was sobbing my eyes out saying, 'I love you darling, but please stop crying'. I know it's not her fault and the poor little thing is in pain, but my head just couldn't cope. Thankfully last night was much better after I remembered the wonders of infacol! It is working but still thinking of going to doctors for a prescription of Colief as I remember that worked well with dd1.
BBL I'm impressed you went out christmas shopping! I'm doing mine online as it's easier!!
I am knackered this morning. I keep doing strange things like waking up in the night, picking Leah up to feed her and then realising that she isn't due a feed and is ASLEEP so why the hell am I disturbing her! Thankfully she seems to be oblivious to it all and goes back to sleep! Then she wakes up an hour or so later when it is time and I'm shattered! And then there is still the 3am poo that seems to last forever and goes everywhere! So have to change her and then feed her and then, well last night at least, it took her a while to settle and then me even longer as was getting a strange pain in my heart region . Then dd woke up too early and had a hissy fit when I told her to go back to bed and got back up half hour later and we came downstairs! Feel like I've had half a day already and it's not yet 7am! And we have a busy weekend so that'll be fun!
And I need to feed Leah! My body had got used to the night time bottles and although I woke up very full and ready to feed, it wasn't too bad, but the last couple of days I have woken up absolutely full to bursting and it's hurting. I'm really hurting and worried that it might lead to mastitis as I remember how horrible that was with dd1. Maybe everything just seems worse this morning as I'm tired!
Oh, and I have to take dd1 to the doctors this morning for her swine flu jab (as she has asthma) and I know she will hate having it done! Have told her about it and said she can have a lollypop if shes really brave! And we are taking her to the farm tomorrow for a christmas spectacular if she's brave too!
Blimey, that was longer than I planned, sorry!!

Morning all xx

Brood I agree you are not being unreasonable at all. I'm being abandoned tomorrow. DH is doing a Japanese exam in London so I am on my own with all three for 12 hours Dreading it.

Katster I do hope you had a better night last night.

Toby was ok last night, waking up as predicted more or less but from 5.30am he was really, really restless waking dozing waking dozing. I finally got him up at 6.45am and have just put him down for a nap (hopefully in his basket!). I'd better go check on him...

V. tired today. Sigh. This zombie state has become the norm. It does not last forever. It does not last forever (repeat ten times!).

Toby is three weeks old today. In some ways it has flown by, in others, it seems yonks and yonks since I woke up that Saturday morning with water leaking thinking 'oooh oooh this is it!'

Arthur is covered in spots - it's just hormonal, perfectly normal, and it will go away on its own. It doesn't have anything to do with how clean their faces are.

Last night he slept from 10 pm until 2 am. I was SO pleased with him! And then it was 4 am, and fussing and fussing in his sleep until 6 am... Sigh.

I got DS 1 his swine flu jab on Monday. He was so funny, bless him - he didn't make a fuss in the surgery, but when he got home, he flopped about holding out his right arm tragically and whimpering 'Arm! Arm!' for maximum sympathy. He kept this up for the next few days - the only problem is that they gave him the jab in his LEFT arm. Am thinking he'll be a natural in Premier League football...

I am wearing sweatpants all the time. I CAN fit into my old fat jeans, but I can't abide the feeling of the denim rubbing against the incision - it's just too sensitive, and the area around the scar is too swollen and sore. I really hope that things settle down there as I'd like to look less slummy mummy at some point...

Struggling to get Toby to have his naps today - trying pick up/put down over and over again. It works eventually but hard work when I have other two to worry about!

Broodzilla, I'm really sorry to hear how you feel. And you are certainly not being unreasonable. I think scarlottis tip is very useful. I thought already my husband can only understand that I do NOT have any me time if he had to stay with Paula on his own for a day. And I really hate it when he goes out after after work, comes home very late and just back to work the next morning as it means I have to be on my own for 36 hours. And he has already told me about some christmas parties he HAS TO go to (I guess the networking is really kind of important too). Well, I suppose compared to others he is still not too bad as he does a lot when he is at home. It's just annoying that he really seems to think he is the one without any time for himself ... and that it is really easy with Paula, even at night when he changes "all" of her nappies (well, those when he is awake which is about 1 out of 4) I'm actually not even sure if it would be safe to leave her with him. He has just the best sleep ever
My sister is coming today with her husband and two kids. So Paula will meet her cousins for the first time. I'm soooo excited already. But they have to leave tomorrow night. So it will be a short visit.

Hope everyone is having a nice weekend with time to rest and hopefully a supportive husband

am having the same trouble too BBL, she will only go to sleep in my arms.

Arthur does that too recently. I just figure that it's better than only going to sleep with a nipple in his mouth like DS 1..?

This sleep thing is tricky - DS1 was rubbish at sleeping in the day at all and would turn into hyper stimulated baby in the evening and would cry for hours. DS2 was better and would sleep ok in the day but better in the pushchair / carseat than at home. Toby seems to be going the same way. When we went Christmas shopping he slept the whole time. At home he is sleeping fitfully and short.