NOV 09 - once the lights are out and the last baby has arrived safe and fine, see you here on cloud nine!

[Broodzilla]

I've just realized we're now under the "being a parent" header. I've got stage freight!

Def very normal to have PND, just ask HV about difference between it and normal blues. Mailny the lenght and severity of symptoms I seem to remember. 6 mths is not Baby blues any more, that should only last a week or two.

Have myfollow-up today and am really nervous about it- hope he will tell me the stitches are normal and that weird feeling will go away...

Goodness..this thread makes me feel human..thank god for you lot...i thought it was just me going mad..

DH calls Charlotte.. Junebug junior as DD1 is Junebug..creative or what!?

We're all going mad... I frequently feel like I am going mad. Toby is now asleep and I'm thinking 'but he doesn't normally sleep at this time, will he settle for the night after his next feed?' So silly. He's usually very cranky in the evening and refuses to settle but he's been fast asleep in his basket for an hour. Poor boy can't do right for doing wrong!!!

Junebug is very cute

DS1 is called 'Bobble' because he used to wear a bobble hat and he was a bottom shuffler so 'bobbled' about the house.

DS2 is 'Pudding', DH named him when he was a few weeks old, and I still call him Pudding. I get funny looks though when we're out and I should 'Pudding! Don't step in that puddle!!!'

Broodzilla, I've just had my little (compared to you tiny, not even worth to mention) experience with worrying about a child. And I feel so sorry for you. But don't forget, it is getting better day by day. The child will feel better and we will get stronger, more experienced and relaxed. And those stupid hormones will have finally eased off too.
As I mentioned, Paula's navel got bloody (and infected apparently) again. But it's only minor. So the HV wanted to BURN/CAUTERISE it. I googled it as I didn't quite understand it and had to cry a little bit because THEY wanted to harm my baby.
Well, luckily the GP didn't think it was that bad and prescribed me something that I have to put on her navel once or twice a day. Still had to cry a little bit on my way back home because of my poor little child. and all about nothing! i can't imagine how i will react in more serious cases... or just for those jabs

I think that 3 months is the first milestone. They tend to have settled into a pattern by then that includes a good block or two of sleep at night and distinct naps/awake times during the day. You get to a point where two lots of 4 hour sleeps is the norm which allows you to function, and feel much more confident in your mummy abilities which takes away the anxiety.
That's what I've found in the past.

PND - I had this after DS1 and it kicked in around 3 months properly. It's much more than blues or worry/anxiety about baby. It's more feeling like life is too much, and not finding any joy in life. I found that DS1 was the only reason for getting out of bed and I didn't get any enjoyment from anything else - almost like I was just going through the motions.
Went to the gp and got some anti-depressants and they worked a treat. Was on them for a few months and they kick started my system again. There is lots of help on offer, and it doesn't have to be pills if that doesn't suit, there is group sessions etc. available through the HV.

Sorry, I am terrible, I have abandoned you all a bit lately! I'm sure I will be back with you from next week, I am staying at my mums until sunday with both children, DP is joining us tomorrow evening and visitors are coming on saturday, which could be a bit overwhelming.

Little Emmeline is lovely, she is feeding like mad but luckily I am making gallons of milk for her. She seems to like to get all her sleep in the day and spend the night feeding/latching on to my arm/spitting up milk all over my bed. She sleeps in a moses basket in theory, but in practice sleeps in my bed, helping herself to milk.

Her bellybutton started bleeding the other day, not much, but at each nappy change I have to clean off a little dried blood- is this normal? I can't remember what happened with DD1.

I gave up and got her a dummy - she was just messing about wanting my boob but then sucking twice and coming off, then as soon as I got dressed she would start again. Trying not to give it to her too much though.

My £70 worth of breast pump broke today, the milk got into the suction tube, mothercare were lovely and are sending out another.

DD1 is being so sweet with the baby, but she is very protective-if anyone she doesn't know holds the baby, she demands that they give her back! I also caught her trying to feed her a smartie yesterday.

I feel so much better in myself now I have had the baby. Scar is just a little stingy, my SPD is almost gone (just the odd movement causes a bit of pain). I feel so much more bonded with the baby this time too, possibly because of the birth being so much nicer, or maybe because I know what I am doing this time.

Right, I will now go and read this thread and catch up!

worst part of b/feeding is nursing bra..cant wait to burn mine...how u supposed to be able to clip them on with one hand?!

Lissy, I think the odd bleeding of the belly button is normal. How does it look "inside"? Paula's started to bleed again, HV pulled it a bit apart and inside it did not look good. So we need to treat it and put some cream on it... not easy as Paula did not just lie still on the changing table.
weston, I hate mine too. and it is a stupid system to have one part of it under the nipple as there is always milk dropping and then it gets wet.... I need at least 2 muslin squares while bf and still need to change Paula and myself about 3 times a day

Lissy, brilliant to hear that the SPD is clearing up! Both times I've noticed a huge difference once the baby's out - when Arthur was two weeks old, I was sitting feeding him cross-legged and my husband remarked 'You haven't been able to do that for eight months, have you?' I hadn't even noticed.

Weston, you get the hang of it. That said, when I'm done with breastfeeding, I never want to hear that little plastic clipping sound ever ever again. I've also informed DH that I'm going to spend a LOT of money at Bravissimo hoisting the poor girls back up to their former position.

Arthur's gone to sleep by 7.30 pm for the last three nights. Fingers crossed, but I think we've got him into a routine of sorts - we didn't get DS 1 into a decent routine until he was six months old. We'd put him down at 6.30, and he'd wake up at 8.30 and proceed to party until 11 pm. It was AWFUL.

Lissy I had the same thing with Ioan, you need to stop cleaning away the dried blood as it's scabbing over to heal. The HV told me that, I stopped cleaning it daily and within a few days all was sorted. The dried bits fall off themselves once the skin underneath has healed.
Great news on your spd - mine went after the birth too.

I don't mind my nursring bras to be honest, but I think it's because I have underwired ones so they feel like (plain) normal bras and give a decent shape. I too though will be hitting bravissimo and getting some decent underwear when I'm done. And some decent pants too - am fed up of these granny pants now!

Ursi you'll find it easier with subsequent children as you won't bother changing them during the day unless they've been really sick!! Ioan gets milk dribbles on his top and I just wipe them up - 3rd baby

Tamlin great news on the routine. DH and I were just saying the other day we'll have to think of one. What is yours? Do you put him up to bed then at 7:30? Do you then go up later for the feeds?

I have had a dreadful night. Finally succumbed to DH's bug and spent a lot of the night on the loo (sorry tmi!) Ioan decided to wake more often for feeding and during one feed I had to put him down to rush to the bathroom. The joys of being a mother eh?! Trust me to choose the night that DH was on a works xmas night out too.
Had the hand gel out too in a vain attempt to make sure Ioan doesn't catch it - fingers crossed he doesn't.
Feeling better this morning though so hopefully it was a one night wonder.

My life is so glamourous not! Desperately need a leg wax too, my legs now look like a gorilla! Was too painful at the end of pg to get done and I just haven't had time as yet since. Next week's mission I think!

Scarlotti poor you glad you are better today. We're also trying to get Toby into a routine of sorts - bath and bed at around 8.30-9pm. Then I got to bed half an hour later!!!

hey all. I have had a relatively good nights sleep, in that Reuben slept in his moses basket for an entire sitting which I think was about 2 hours! Yey! He did feed, feed feed all night to the point that it is around 1-2 hourly, but then he has a big jump where he sleeps for 2-3 hours. He likes morning sleeping. And I feel surprisingly good for the lack of sleep and the sleeping propped up while feeding him. I often wake to find myself holding him . But I tend to lean slightly into the bed rather than out, so I won't accidently drop him which I fear.

Undercarriage is still sore, but I think is getting better, but blimey it stings to wee doesn't it

I appear to have not succumbed to the whole baby blues yet, I am a bit grumpy from time to time, but that is nothing unusual and is probably just a bit of tiredness. I am however, fully expecting it to hit me any time, although I only had it for one day with DD so maybe I am lucky.

brood, really do not put too much pressure on yourself to feel happy, full of beans and on top of the world emotionally right now. That is not to say that you should leave any feelings of being really down and ignore them, but do realise that being a mum is an anxious time, you are learning things you have never done before, and your little Lucas is poorly, of course this is going to impact on how you are feeling. While I did not experience 'baby blues' with DD, I did cry all the time. I just felt overwhelmed a lot, and I would cry because DD was so beautiful, because she blinked her eyes at me, because I loved her so much. But, still I cried constantly. And as others have said, there are plenty of milestones, 3 months is a good one, but generally, when they start to sleep through for a period of time where you can breathe without them being constantly at your side, so you can sleep, catch up on washing, eat a whole meal, drink a hot drink, leave the house that kind of thing, which IMO is when they sleep for 4 hours, this can give you so much more feeling of calm. And remember, sleep deprivation is used as a form of torture for a reason, it has very significant and negative affects on our lives, so once that eases, you may find you feel much more in control. Gosh that went on. I have thoughts, but they are not wanting to come out well

v bad nights sleep here, am soo tired today. feel like i could sleep for a week. Even failed to get ds to playgroup again for the second time this week tho this time I cant blame it on the weather it was purely my lack of motivation due to my tiredness so not good at all. was hoping for a nap but have to wait for a parcel to be delivered for dh. hopefully it will come in the early part of the deliver slot so I can get a few mins when ds is down, that is if Annabelle is sleeping too.

Brood ditto Pav I cry all the time too..
Charlotte vomits at least once a day and I'm a wreck after that..for the whole day...roll on three months..no one can do much about the bubbas..they rely on us completely and it is over whelming but it gets easier...(she reminds herself)...lets all belly dance to the sleep gods for more sleep....

oh and ladies with sore undercarriages, remember to wear cotton pads not those synthetic ones..it takes longer to heal...

Oh sleepless, I'm sorry, vomiting is soul-destroying. DS 1 was a happy baby, but he used to projectile-vomit across the room at least three times a day or so - I used to have to change my entire outfit as even my underwear would be sopping wet. We had layers of towels on our bed, the couch, and the laundry was unreal. I remember going to wash the vomit out of my hair one day, and then realizing that there was no point. If Charlotte is losing an entire feed's worth, talk to the doc about getting a Gaviscon prescription - it helps to form a barrier to stop everything coming straight back up.

Scarlotti, I don't actually have a proper routine for the baby yet. I just wake him up at 5 pm if he isn't awake already, and then take him up to the bedroom at 7.10 when we take DS 1 up for his bedtime stories. I nurse him while DH reads the stories, and by the time we're done and DS 1 is stowed safely away, Arthur's dropped off. I put him in his Moses basket, and feed him at 9.30 when I go to bed.

I cry all the time too. I cried today because Toby did not weant to settle for a nap this lunchtime despite being tired and I sat with him, cuddled him, re-settled him, cuddled him, re-settled him over and over for 1 hour before he fell asleep. I was in tears by then. I remember doing this with DS2 too.

Toby and I are going Christmas shopping after he wakes and has another feed. I need to get out! Despite being so tired zzzz.

He'll be three weeks tomorrow and I feel guilty that I might be wishing away these early weeks just because they are hard.

tamlin no routine? Sounds suspiciously like a routine to me

Good morning all-- terrible night here too, Esme feeding every, what, 30 min? For two min then back to sleep until I push her half a cm away to sleep myseld, then she wakes up, etcpp.

still not too bad, even let Dh with manflu sleep in. (he's pushing it by going to get a hair cut)

Just throwing in that depression doesn't have to be the sad feeling- it can be feelings of aggression and other stuff too. If in doubt, bring it up with doctor. No need to suffer through it without help.

Pav get yourself a jug in your loo and pour and pee!

All you ladies doing nightly baths - are you using wash stuff e.g. johnsons or something?

Ioan possets during and after each feed and now has spots over his cheeks. Not sure whether I can put anything on it? Water cleaning him isn't enough. Poor boy seems to struggle to bring up his wind now too - just started in the last few days, not sure why.

I like the idea of starting a bed routine of sorts, but don't have thr brain power to work out fitting it around tea and DS1's bedtime! Must focus.

scarlotti i am doing that...it still stings...! I am also 'airing' each day, and having a nice warm bath before my shower. I am finding it easier if I lean forward when i pee and i do not try to hold it, get it over with quickly!

DH is getting me some witchhazel, as per comma's suggestion, that and cold cold flannel sounds like bliss so i shall be doing that as soon as he gets back from town with it. if he ever leaves. He does do a lot, but he has mostly spent today playing Bejewelled and I could do twice as much as he has in half the time if I did not have a baby permamently attached to me. I have been waiting for him to go so I can get some sleep all day.

Bejewelled? That game is evil. I haven't played it since Toby was born because it is so addictive and I have NO TIME.

We're off Christmas shopping now

Scarlotti spots on babies cheeks over here as well. Dry skin on his forhead too. I've left them and wash his face twice a day with cotton wool and warm water. It's something to do with our hormones being inside them, I might be wrong though .

Pav I was doing 1-2 hour feeds, day and night and I was totally exhausted. Feeds seem to have spaced out a little more and I tend to nurse him every 3hrs now. The downside to this is my breasts hurt when he hasn't fed for more than 3 hrs. I can't win!

Mind you the last 2 nights I've been up nursing every 2 hrs because he has congestion that's become worse the past week. He can't feed very well of a night and I've had to sit up and bf him so he can breathe easier. HV has told me its the amniotic fluid that he's trying to get rid of.

Success. Well I don't like to speak too soon. I've managed to lay him down in his cot upstairs after bf him. He has been sleeping there for half hr so far. I want to get him used to his cot so I can stop co-sleeping. I just don't sleep very well when he's in bed with me. He slept in the cot for a couple of hours last night but the congestion started up.

Hi girls, I was AWOL and I apologise! So good I have some time today to catch up with all of you. Ds is at friends house so no school run this afternoon, just have to pick him up at 6.30 from around the corner. Might even get away with not getting dressed properly?
Whoever was talking about rubbish dh. I agree completely it does get better with more babies you have although dh hasn?t changed one nappy so far - week 5! but has been fantastic with ds, housework and treating me so can?t complain really. It?s just the way he is. He is not comfy with newborns; they are too fragile for him he gets more hands on as they grow. He won?t even hold somebody else?s child (even bigger one) as he is worried he would drop them!
Routines - I must say that this time I m the one really realizes about Olivia?s routine and dh is the one saying should she be up or asleep now, is she hungry NOW/ when was her last feed? And we should really make sure she is on proper routine. But I am just like one ear in and out another. Olivia is really a contented little girl so who needs that Ford woman right? Hmm, except that with ds I did her routine and it worked a treat? obviously I changed a thing or two as it suited me! What?s the point of having a good routine during the day as I still stay glued to the sofa all afternoon and evening due to cluster feeding hey?
As I said I am very flexible with Olivia?s routine but I try to bath her every evening but anytime between 6 and 8pm depending on what ds is doing and if she?s done one of hers explosive poos! I then feed her straight away but let her sleep in the living room (while dh and I get on with things) so she is not in deep sleep and feed her when she wants but at 11pm I always wake her up and take her into darkish bedroom , change her nappy to wake her up fully and feed her with dimmed light. Then she goes into her cot or my bed (depending how tired I am!). It seems to work wonders as she is then asleep till 6 sometimes 8am so can?t complain really! Not every night though she does get up around 3 or 4 am some nights for a feed but I can cope with that!
Diets - So happy to hear that at least some of you have bad diets at the moment mine is appalling but have been taking the vitamins to make up for it right? I think my body is still in pregnancy mode, still on sugary snacks and cakes here! And it?s not surprising that I am putting on weight. God it?s so depressing. I can?t fit into any of my prepregnancy clothes and still wear my maternity trousers and skirts. How embarrassing. Good its winter though as don?t take my coat off unless I really have to?.
Bf - Fruitpastels and Tamlin ( think it was you) talking about spraying milk everywhere, when my breasts were full like that Livy would just open her mouth and patiently lick the nipple and let it run into her mouth until things calmed down than she would latch on and had a proper feed. I think she knew that otherwise she would drown 
Nicknames - we call Olivia a pretzel as she folds her little body that way and also because she is the sweetest pink thing ever and I could just dunk her in my coffee (decaff of course!)
Broodzilla that?s what tiredness does to us. I am sure once he is better you will feel too! You mentioned that babies can?t sleep on the side? Why is that? Olivia loves it!
Scarlotti Olivia came out in spots this morning too. Is that what they call the baby acne? Whats possetting? I am a foreigner?.
Fruitpastels dry forehead here too!

oops that was long!