December 2006- Here's to pre-school newbies, business starters and twin survivers.

[Indith]

Oh go on then.

I'm rubbish at titles though but I bow down to Oli's cakes and supermum.

EVye - Who did you use to be?

What happened to Magnolia, sorry I would read through all the posts but quite frankly you guys can talk!

Indith - My DD was terrified of doing poos on the loo or potty. I let her have a nappy on to do it, then she told me when done, we cleaned her up and carried on in pants. Lasted about 6-8 weeks iirc then one day she just went to the loo. She needed to get over the fear and regain a bit of control I think.

Ahh thank you EVye that makes sense now, hello "waves" now I know who you are!

Thanks for letting me know, she had gone of the FB group as well and there was no way of finding out that I could see!

Dsis has gone in today for an ERPC. They wanted to make her wait for another week to see if she would miscarry it naturally but she was in such a state on Friday they booked her in for today. Can't remember who asked but this was pg2. She already has a dd who is 2 next week but they'd been trying for this one for almost a year. She fell straightaway with her dd.

Thanks for all the thoughts, I have been incredibly lucky not to have been through it so I have no idea what to do or say to help .

DH is away for the next 2 weeks and phoned half an hour after he left to say someone had rear-ended him at a pedestrian crossing. [anger]. He's supposed to be driving over 1200 miles while he's away and now the back of the car is completely smashed in. He says it's driveable but he's not had it checked by anyone .

Just waiting for the 3rd bad thing to happen so it's all out of the way......

Oli.

I know you were sympathetic when my Dsis MC'd and, like you, I've never been through it either.

Me and my mum bought an orchid for my sister, just so she'd know that we were thinking of her.

It's such a sad thing to happen but it was the first time I had seen my sister and her partner as one unit (iykwim) and they got engaged about 6 months later then married a year after and are due their baby this year. It's taken them 2 years and I am sure it still is in the forefront of their minds.

Just give her a big hug and somehow she'll get through it. There's a thread about spirit children somewhere (if you're that way inclined) a lovely thread and very comforting.

Oh, Oli, your poor sis. It's never happened to me either but can see how devastating it's been to friends. Hope dh's car holds up! So you're on your own for a fortnight? And here am I panicking because dp is away one night this week!

Was me that asked Oli. I've had two, possibly 3 MC's, the third was extremely early though if it was and I do think it was...

You can only be there for her, it is the most devestating thing to happen IME, but sadly, it is very common. If you've never experienced a MC, you are extremely lucky as 1 in 4 pg's end this way.

I found that making up a memory box with the testing stick, scan pics(albeit of the failed fetus)if she has one and pics of myself and baby's father were very comforting and was a lasting box of love. I also planted a garden plant which, funnily enough lived for many years and the year that I felt the pain lift away, the plant died; it was very strange.

*devastating

Oli - I'm so sorry about your sister. I had a mc before dd was conceived but it was very early and she was conceived the following month so I never really had enough time to process what had happened. Am certain it contributed to the antenatal depression I had when pregnant with her, and I had an impending sense of doom throughout her pg which was all consuming.

My mum had a mmc and with her the most important thing was to keep talking. She was keen to talk about it and I think most people had shut it out other than a cursery comment. She sadly had a full term stillbirth pretty soon after the mmc so it blurs into one, it was a terrible time.

All ok here except still snowed under with uni work and really strung out and tired. Go on holiday on 3 weeks and much as I am looking forward to it I could really do without being away right now, have too much to so in too little time.

Lenni, I was the same though I didn't fall pg again for almost another 2 years.
I too was depressed throughout the pg, with that terrible feeling of impending doom. I felt everything would go wrong and so didn't enjoy the pg because of it.

My local hospital ran a MC support group which helped a lot. I don't know if there are any around these days, perhaps it's worth looking into Oli?

Oli hope your sister is getting lots of support.

Been visiting nurseries today. The pre school at the local primary only offers 5 mornings or 5 afternoons which could be a bit of a pain really as I wouldn't have the time to get anywhere between drop off and pick up so would seriously limit what I can do. Also went to a private nursery which offers the funded places which I think may be the one to go for as we could put him in for a whole day plus a half day. We'll have to pay for a couple of extra hours but I can work it all in with dh and bf group to not have any extra bus trips to make. I so look forward to having to do school runs

Hull meetup can be confirmed for 27th I shall have both my dec 06 and dec 08 models with me but only 1 carseat which could limit where we go.

Can't believe it is already Wednesday, just 2 days left of dh's holiday then back to business as usual.

Preschool sounds great, indith, I send ds2 2 days a week term-time, just turned down a place that was 5 mornings/afternoons. Even if I wasn't working I wouldn't do it! Yep, school runs PITA really, starts next sept eeeek.
27th April ok, in my diary. And btw, would have an extra seat for dd/ds in my car. Phaps we should move our discussions to text - I have yours Indith/Lenni but not Olihan's.
Feel very grateful to have never had to suffer a m/c, friend of mine had 3 in a row & 1 was the day I had dt's so she couldn't even face talking to me for several weeks after. Luckily she is 27 weeks with dc3 now.

Indith - all pre-schools will offer funding for 15 hours from Sept (currently 12.5)

Just to re-iterate what the others have said, I had numbers 7 & 8 last year which is probably why I am completely paranoid the entire pregnancy that something has happened.

Just be there and willing to talk about it if they want to.

I am convinced that miscarrying DD1's twin was what triggered my antenatal and the postnatal depression with her, as I had lost a baby but at the same time I was still pregnant...

Oh gosh, I didn't realise how many of you have had miscarriages or how many some of you have had . I feel even more lucky now. Dsis is being stoical at the moment, I'm guessing it may hit her later on. Solo, the MC support group sounds like such a valuable service, I'll see if there's one in her area. I've sent her a link to a couple of MC threads on here too.

Congratulations WB , don't think I've actually said it in my navel gazing last few posts.

And hello Solo as well .

Will put the 27th on the calendar and book ds1 and dd into after school club. I'll FB you my mobile no, AQ.

Indith, I would definitely recommend going for full days if you have that option. Dd only did mornings last year and it was so restricting in terms of what I could get done while she was there. Ds2 is going to do 2 full days when he goes . Mind you, no one told me just how quickly a 6 hour school day goes by .

The MC support group I went to was run by two of the nurses that were involved on the ward I was on, it took place one evening a month I think(could've been more often, I've forgotten). Not sure if it was purely voluntary on their part, but it was a good experience to be able to share your feelings with other empty wombs and broken hearts. It kind of made me feel that actually, it really is alright to feel like this. It's perfectly reasonable to grieve for your lost baby, grieve for the fact that you'll never hold or nurse that lo that you wanted so much...
Sorry, I'll shut up. It still hurts in an odd way

Oh solo.

Hi all

Can I be really cheeky, my daughters school is in a competition to get a raised bed allotment and its all down to votes on this website

www.getschoolsgrowing.co.uk/

All of the other schools involved (bar one which is in the process of being closed) are doing far better than us, but they are all primary schools with both infant & juniors wheras we are just a junior school, so we have half as many parents to vote!

I would really, really appreciate it

Her school is Kingscroft

Thank you

Have voted weirdbird

My housekeeping purse is empty and I still have a week and a half til the end of the month. Is it just me or is food getting more and more expensive? We make everything from scratch and it isn't as though my tesco list is indulgant.

I got all excited as I thought I'd spotted a pound coin under the tissue box but it turned out it was a chocolate one

I don't like milk chocolate so it wasn't even exciting in that respect

I may go post my monthly Tesco list on the main boards to get some ideas of where to cut back.

Crazy week here. I let the thread drop off completely. Two charities, two major events in April and I'm on committees for both. Just wondering how in the heck I managed to do this.

oli, I'm glad they got your dsis in sooner rather than later. The next two months can be really rough as hormones are all over the place. The spirit babies thread (there's also a book by the same name) is very nice. It may be helpful to her.

Spring break is here. Just wondering how we're going to survive! Dh is thinking of taking the boys on a camping trip later this week. Brave man....

voted just now WB, sure there was something else on FB I am meant to do but can't remember - anyone remind me?
Back at work tomorrow and panicking about it, don't know why really. I hate change.
Solo, really felt your ache from that post
jabber, I'm sure you'll get through it all, just take a deep breath!

Oh solo . It never goes away, I guess.

Just bracing myself for dh going away again for the whole week. Why is it when he goes away ds1 and dd decide thy aren't going to sleep through either? I had 2 out of 3 dcs up every night last week . And not at the same time either. Hey ho.

AQ, FB me your mobile number for sorting the 27th?

Jabber, one word - WINE .

"What are you doing ds?"

"Nothing Mummy!"

Does he really think I'm going to fall for that one?