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Dec 08 - 9 months in, 9 months out!

999 replies

jumpjockey · 03/09/2009 21:34

Hope you don't mind the dodgy thread name but all our babies are 9 months old now or in the next few weeks

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
urbanewarrior · 24/09/2009 17:42

Daisy really sorry to hear about your nan.

The nanny has another job . She was absolutely lovely so am completely crushed and of course everyone else we interviewed pales in comparison. Need to stop being pathetic about it and set up some more interviews but am secretly hoping she'll change her mind. Which of course she won't because she's a proper person and wouldn't let the other family down.

Ho hum. Sympathies with everyone else worrying about childcare. I've not done this before as DH was at home when I went back to work after DS and it's so difficult trying to work out what's best. We haven't got an option of nurseries because the ones near us are full or awful. If I can't find anyone I like though I'm going to have to delay going back to work and they won't keep the job open forever.

Sorry - am really miserable and wallowing in it . Not least because when I called DH he treated me like it was a work problem and started suggesting what I should do next. Which made me mad. And DS always picks up when I'm fed up, which to be fair isn't very often, and started crying and telling me I was making him sad.

Ok will be back and more chipper later. The chat about relationships is v interesting - invis I think it was you saying about long car journeys being a good place to talk. Before DS starting throwing up I really looked forward to being in the car just so we could talk.

Oh and Kayz we got some great deals on here

Veggiemummy · 24/09/2009 19:06

Oh no Urbane, what a pain. Where you just too late. God it's like buying a house a few years ago, you have to say yes to one even before your sure just incase someone else gets in.

ZJ I can't believe your mum gave you sleeping pills. Better watch out when DD has one of her supposed anti nanna tantrums, she might slip her a Valium.

notjustanumber · 24/09/2009 19:07

Arti stupid question but where do you look for nanny shares. It sounds good, I want one, then the boys can be together !

Daisy I'm sorry to hear about you gps. My dad had a bit of a scare recently and I reminded myself that not all cancer is untreatable so not to think the worst. Hopefully they caught it early.

Veggiemummy · 24/09/2009 20:58

Last I'm watching that L,L,L now. Oh I def would not go for the Alvaston option no matter how big the space is. That 3rd Derby place is near our house. Also nice to see the prices, our place is a midterrace too but in much better state of renovation.

pmk1 · 24/09/2009 22:56

Veggie Thanks so much for the early fb message I feel so old... but so thankful for my lovely ds.... I can't imagine life without him now

I am to say I started reading and catching up and then kept getting sidetracked and missed bits I know... I am hopeless. I did manage to remember a few things though!

Kayz!! Wow - I hope you get the news you are after.... fingers crossed for you.

Lady You may have read back and thought you sounded like a spoilt cow, but my first thought was - you didn't delete what you wrote, and that speaks volumes (by the way it doesn't make you sound like that at all) The new place is great. I have been having real melt downs at dh though, and I'm not sure if i'm completely over-reacting or not. I need someone to be a fly on the wall and tell me... know what I mean?
I don't know if I'm going through a phase of being terrified and over protective of ds or if it's warranted? I've lost all perspective...

Mom I'm right there with you - hoping for another year of ML too!

Kiwi I know how you feel.... kind of, except i'm not faced with it yet, so again i'm not the best person to comment, but i'm going through a bit of seperation anxiety here myself - and it's not coming from ds, it's all me! I keeping having these horrible thoughts of silly things going wrong or ds having accidents... Veggie I think you touched on something like this awhile back? if so it's exactly the same for me.... I keep putting myself in these horrible scenario's and imagining what I would do if such and such awful thing happened. I do it with dh as well.... it's silly and really.
Oh an Kiwi, don't worry dd's whoozit is safe and sound hanging out with Paddington Bear, Gerry giraffe & the V-tech walker until she wants it back!

Oh I had loads more to say but again I've forgotten.... Do you lot take notes? it's my birthday in an hour and 15 mins - eek I'm half way to 70. dh is at some drug rep dinner (and on leave) and I've had half a bottle of cheerfulness on my own whilst watching what Katie did next I'm so not acting my age.... but then again do I ever? Right off to recharge my glass

I will add more later or tomorrow

pmk1 · 24/09/2009 22:57

Oh and I watched LLL last night too - Totally agree with you Lady I actually said to dh I want to hire him when we are looking for the next house to buy!!

pmk1 · 24/09/2009 22:58

Oh and Derby looks quite nice! Oh and gee I loved that house that was WAY too far to commute to!!

pmk1 · 24/09/2009 23:13

Oh and Urbane/Lal sorry about your Nanny.... tis for a reason though.... not sure what the reason is, but I believe that. it will work out.

zoejeanne · 24/09/2009 23:34

LadyT I?m thrilled you like the M&S clothes ? one of my close friends is a buyer of baby clothes for M&S (which sounds like one of the loveliest jobs in the world), so I will bask in her reflected glory. On your DP ? I agree that you can?t dictate how he shows affection, but also he can?t dictate how you feel affection, so you both need to step out of your comfort zone on that one, and it sounds to me like you have and he hasn?t. You don?t sound spoilt or whingey at all (hug)

I also pondered on nurseries vs childminders Kiwi ? but chose to look at nurseries first simply because the list was shorter and so easier to compare. We found a nursery we really liked and that just felt right, so I decided against looking into CMs and go with my gut on it. On CMs, I think I was worried that DD might not be with other children her age, and also I didn?t know of any round here that came with a recommendation from anyone I know, whereas our chosen nursery did. I would be interested to hear from those who?ve gone with CMs, why they chose it over nursery ? as there?s still time to change my mind if I get wobbly on it! Urbane sorry to hear the nanny isn?t available for you, I have my fingers crossed that another lovely one pops up very soon

Jolly Bruges. I love it there, especially the chocolate and mussels, mmm. And I was sad to hear that you lost your brother ? there seems so many people on here who are without loved ones

Daisy as soon as you mentioned your Nan I thought of her in her finery. If I remember, didn?t she pull through remarkably quickly when she was ill earlier in the year? I hope she can do the same with the cancer. And your Grandad too ? it never rains, but it pours

I wish I could?ve come round to do the painting Veggie, it sounds great fun . I went to see my goddaughter recently (18 months) and she?d been hand painting and showed me her artwork ? her Mum said ?tell auntie ZJ where you put the paint? (meaning on her hands), to which my goddaughter replied ?on the shelf? . And on the sleeping pills ? I think Mum got them from the doctor, no pretences what or who they were for. I bet that wouldn?t happen today!

Happy birthday PMK ? what a great way to start your celebration!

I had a question I've been meaning to ask all week, but right now have forgotten what it is. Bet I remember as soon as I shut down! Oh well, night night everyone

Kayzr · 24/09/2009 23:34

Hello!!!

Just back from the pub. It was so nice to be out and just mucking around with friends.

Daisy, so sorry to hear about your GP. Hope it's not too bad news.

PMK, hope you have a brilliant birthday. Enjoy your cheerfulness.

Urbane, sorry to hear about the nanny.

I have awful heartburn which I think is a mixture of blue WKDs and chicken kiev pizza!

Night all.

LadyThompson · 25/09/2009 10:14

Hello girls

Lal/Urbaneski* - how disappointing for you about the nanny. I am really sorry. I hope you can find someone else who is ace in time. What a stress it is (and also for Kiwi and others). I know how anxious I felt when I thought I was going back to work...and I remember all the really helpful responses I got at the time. Crossing fingers for everyone very much.

Daisy, your poor GPs. So many cancers are treatable now, so hopefully it's one of them. She sounds like such a terrific lady.

Jolly - I love Belgium - a deeply underrated place in my view. Antwerp is great too (I have a friend who lives there) as is Brussels. And you can't beat a minibreak! ZJ is right though; a lot of people have lost people on here. I am sorry about your brother. I do remember you mentioning it before.

PMK - Happy Birthday young lady! I think cheerfulness and What Katie Did are an excellent way to usher in your birthday, personally. I watched it myself when DP was at a chambers meeting the other night and when he came back he was incredulous that I would watch such crap but I actually find it fascinating. What a strange person she is. And all that business of wearing her wedding dress to her friends' gay wedding vows renewal. And the horrid screechy singing, yikes. Glad the house is working out. I was in Reading the other day, shopping, thinking again that it really isn't bad for shops (though I know it's further away from there than your alternative place would have been). I too have horrid flash forwards about bad things happening to DD, but I think that's just motherhood

ZJ, that is such a clever thing to say about him not being able to dictate how I feel affection - I wish I had thought of that! I will be keeping THAT one in my back pocket though I hope I won't need it - after the posh lunch the other day he also took me up to the pub for supper last night and even managed to tell me I looked nice (compliments are rare around here), so I think he is really trying. I just wish we weren't locked into this Bridget Jones-Mark Darcy dynamic. Because I ain't Bridget Jones, and always find Colin Firth a bit frustrating...Yes, the separates for girls in M&S are very nice, particularly in the Autograph range. Don't know what the boy stuff is like, for those with DSs. I bought some nice bright babygros as well.

We did have a lovely time the pub last night and DD was so fab. She had her milk at the table and her other food, then bits off our plate - grown up things like olives, too - then she went to sleep. She is impeccable in public. But she shook her fists in my face this morning again as her milk wasn't ready the minute she got out of bed Maybe she has taken my remarks about the importance of good service far too seriously.

Veggie, I too thought the places featured in Derbyshire looked lovely. I was so sorry for the young couple at the end who came a cropper with their mortgage.

Good weekends to all. We are off to see our new house tomorrow - still not exchanged though...Other than that, there's a NT place called Buscot Park and I want to go there again before it shuts for the winter.

  • Lal, I dreamed about you last night, probably because reading about your nanny was one of the last things I did before bed, and we were in a Gulag. But THAT is because I was telling DP about One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich....
JollyBear · 25/09/2009 10:20

Morning all,

PMK Happy birthday!! . Sounds like a good evening to me . I am feeling the same re separation anxiety. DD is fine without me but the idea of not being with her makes me feel physically sick. Oh well, should be interesting starting work next week . I also find my mind mulling over horrible senarios, especailly if I can't sleep.

daisy Sorry to hear about your grandparents both being ill. Re the skin cancer, my Grandad had it about twenty years ago and recovered well. He is 99 now , so even though they are getting on a bit they can still get better and keep going for years yet.

ZJ I did chuckle at the sleeping pills. My mum hurt her hand once as she was trying to smack my brothers bottom (he was trying to get the fire guard off and he kicked her, she wasn't using huge force!) and our GP told her to use her slipper next time. She didn't take his advice thankfully!

lal Sorry to hear your nanny fell through. I'll keep my fingers crossed something comes up soon.

kayz Are you planning to test or see if your period arrives?

I'm with ladyT on the not crawling thing. I'm secretly rather pleased that DD can't get about . She gets into enough mischief shuffling on her bottom!

Kayzr · 25/09/2009 10:22

I have added a test to my tesco shop that is coming tonight. I have said I won't test until Tuesday but knowing me I will test tomorrow morning!!

Veggiemummy · 25/09/2009 12:50

Believe me Lady it's for the best really Alveston is not a good place to live for those 2.

Sorry in a rush as about to leave to go for lunch with a friend in Nottingham then down to Luton. We have an early flight in the morning to Sardinia so staying at the old Holiday inn express Luton airport hooray!

Happy birthday KMP sorry no time for other messages.

spotofcheerfulness · 25/09/2009 18:33

Happy Birthday KMP!
Have a lovely holiday Veggie, I love Sardinia. .
at your dream LadyT.

urbanewarrior · 26/09/2009 00:10

Hope you've had fab day pmk - very happy birthday

Ladyt I love urbaneski I had a bit of a craze for all things Russian for most of my early 20s. I don't know why. Vodka related probably. And 'One day in the...' is a favourite. I don't think I'd be much good in a gulag though.

More nanny interviews tomorrow. Am slightly losing the will to. Good nights all - and happy holidays veggie

waitinggirl · 26/09/2009 04:15

following our millpond sleep plan. she isn't now feeding straight before bed. and tonight is the first night she hasn't fed at all. this is progress. but she has now replaced feeding to sleep with falling asleep on one of us. and waking up basically every 40 mins. this means she has woken up and needed attention 8 times tonight already. and it is only 4am.

don't get me wrong, we are one week into a 6 week plan and the next step is - gulp - putting her down in her cot awake (this will amount to controlled crying as she hates it just so much). but she is teething at the mo (top front ones coming down) and we had originally attributed the more frequent wakings to teeth, but every time i've gone in tonight to massive wails and screams, they have finished the minute i pick her up and she falls asleep on me almost immediately. she hasn't seemed in pain once i've picked her up at all. she just won't be put down.

ugh ugh ugh. sorry for the rant. i can't decide whether to feel desperate, despondent, or reasonably optimistic. hard to do at 4.15am when you've had paltry sleep.

Kayzr · 26/09/2009 07:02

Morning,

WG Try to feel a little bit optimistic if you can. With DS2 the first night we put him in his cot and I just sat with him for 1.5 hours so not really controlled crying as such, the next night was just an hour of sitting there. The third night I just put him in his cot and he was asleep within 5 minutes and it has been the same since.

All I did was sit next to the cot and say "ssshhh" every now and then. I know it seems like really hard work and it feels quite nasty when they cry but she will learn to settle herself soon.

notjustanumber · 26/09/2009 07:15

WG I really wish I could come round and make you a cup of tea and play with madam for a bit to give you a break. I'm sorry its so hard I hope you and your husband are OK.
Kayz, I admire your energy and look forward to hearing your result.

Am very envious of Veggies holiday and move to amsterdam. I dont have that kind of energy either !

My two are starting to play together now and its really lovely. Though DS1 was in a massive strop yesterday as he was tired - as he keeps wiggling out of all his duvets and wakes up because he is cold If you tuck him in with a blanket, he wiggles out so he is lyzing horizontally along the pillow. I have to get up in the night a lot to him at the moment.

I am really annoyed with H. Last night he bought me some nice chocolates and I ate some and put them in the fridge. This morning I get up and he has finished the lot, the bugger. When I'm tired I find a choc really helps me in the morning

Kayzr · 26/09/2009 07:21

Energy? What energy?

I have no energy at all. DS2 might sleep now but I don't. I woke about 6 times last night. It is driving me mad!!

pmk1 · 26/09/2009 08:04

Thanks alll for the lovely birthday wishes! Had a lovely day and the weather was great. Went to a pub I really like for lunch and a walk with ds, dh and dd (dog) Quiet night with my Bombay-B-Club curry yum and more cheerfulness Tonight off to mil for dinner with a bit of shopping on the way

Did anyone watch Derren B? I totally drew circles - a snowman from 3 circles of varying size. Dh just rolled his eyes as I then started looking up John Edward tour dates. (dh not quite convinced about these things lol)

WG hope you get some rest today or at some point soon. ds was really unsettle awhile back with his teeth and the same thing he was fine when I picked him up. Hard, but dh made me just give him calpol and leave him. He did go to sleep eventually. dh can be a bit the other extreme though and turns the monitor down low etc but he did fall asleep eventually. He also had really ba nappy rash at the time and we just caked on the Sudacrem which helped. Hope it gets better for you soon.

Kayz any news???????

Lady - that happens here - very annoyed if no milk the minute he see's me in the morning - even if he's just nattering away to himself when he wakes - the minute I enter his room if I'm not carrying big white bottle all hell breaks loose!
My friens baby - 11 months, doesn't have milk first thing - i'm wondering if I should go straight to breakfast first? Anyone else do that?

Righty oh - off to capture ds who has high tailed it to the back door!!

Kayzr · 26/09/2009 08:09

Nope no news except my Tesco shop arrived last night without my pregnancy tests!! They were unavailable

pmk1 · 26/09/2009 08:17

oooh strange kayz......

daisydora · 26/09/2009 08:39

Morning all,

kayz you can't keep us in suspenders all weekend! Nip to the shops and buy one. Do you still have that strange feeling?

pmk Happy belated birthday and very pleased to hear you had a lovely day.

wg you have all my sympathies. We have had some truly horrendous nights with DS the past 3 nights. I am lucky to get more than 3 hours sleep and its killing me. He wakes roughly at midnight and then screams off and on all night till he 'wakes' for the day at 6ish. I have assumed its teeth related but despite shovelling Calpol and IB down his neck at the appropriate times it makes no fecking difference. Last night his screaming woke DD so i was awake from midnight till about 4am, just getting to sleep again when DS had another screaming/coughing fit at 5am.

DH is at work, so I'm all alone with them and already on a short fuse with DD. And to boot DH and I had the obligatory argument in the middle of the night over what is wrong with DS/why he won't sleep/where we are going wrong. DH thinks the Dr was wrong and that DS is ill He isn't really ill in himself just grumpy and in pain when he coughs(which is mainly at night).

Oh ignore me and my woes...sleep deprivation is no good for me. Self pity is no good for the soul....

daisydora · 26/09/2009 08:40

Oh and urbane bad news on the nanny front. I do hope you find some suitable alternative and soon.