Oh Ginny. I know why you're thinking that but you know that it's so extremely unlikely. Turner's is a chromosomal "accident", dd2 is not more more likely to have it because dd1 has it. And have a look at lots of babies in the next few days. How many are puffy? How many have low hairlines? Broad chests? How many of your boys were puffy at birth? How many of these babies have Turner's?
You do not need to man up. You need to accept that you feel this way and with just cause. I give you permission to feel crappy and to struggle with life today. It does not make you a lesser person, it makes you honest.
And not be seen like what? Those welfare officers and social workers and the judge cannot see inside your head. And I promise you faithfully that there won't be a person in that room that doesn't have something running round their heads that they are blindsided by or worried about or preoccupied by and have no wish to share with the world.
Everybody on this thread does it, I promise you. Ask any of us to list the things that worry us at this moment in time, to be totally up front. Ask any of us if we're ashamed of parenting decisions we make, if we choose the wrong path or wish for our lives to be different in some way. Ask us if paranoia or unhappiness sometimes cloud over the good bits? My God, yes. Of course. And thank God, yes. We're human, fallible, flawed. We are not robots. It says nothing about you or us other than we're like everybody else out there.
Whoever told you you couldn't struggle or find things hard sometimes? I'll happily throttle them. Why can't it be you that needs help this time? It's life Jim and the thing that makes the difference is not feeling this way, but how you deal with it. It is not brave to struggle on regardless, it is brave to stop and ask for help.
Now, Gin, what help do you need?
Oh and, er, geology ROCKS!!