April 2009 - Chapter 3 - Let us round up the stragglers

[PuzzleRocks]

Ta da.

Thanks both -

Auld glad you are feeling better

TBH am not worried about it - I just think that when you throw a baby in the mix not only does it throw all your hormones all over the place, it becomes harder to mask those times when you want to throw something at your DH and vice versa so arguments are more forthcoming and tempers flare a lot more - I still love him just as much but like I said before I just think those times when you don't like each other are more obvious! The MIL has seen a different side of me this time and not sure she likes it all that much but like nutty said - relationship = partnership therefore he should be responsible for K too on this holiday instead of sleeping until 11, and having an three hour afternoon nap, while I am up at 4, 5, and 6 every morning feeding and eventually giving up and taking K out!

Auld - v jealous of your pre-preg weight! I would love to not eat for 36 hours but I can't stop myself - having said that I do feel firmer out here but not sure if that is the slight tan faking some sort of shape - still a way to go though!!!

Am with you on the nasty regime, K has become really clingy and wanting to feed every 2 hours again and it is driving me up the wall!!! He is much better today but then there is just me, mum and sister here so not as much going on, and he is not being woken up to be played with - yes it seems the rules about not waking up a sleeping baby don't apply for Turkey - I think the longest he gets with everyone around is half an hour and thats only when I have him!!

And K is having none of the dummy either - he knows it means sleep so is now refusing to accept it!

Schultes, dip was lovely, just popped in for some lunch then going to walk down the beach front to the shops and have a potter around...

Haven't read thread properly yet, but just a quick omigod Kali you are DEFINITELY me... O had the worst night ever last night too... he was up every hour crying and crying I was wondering if it was teething... he is sooo miserable today, but will he nap - will he heck. I too feel like the living dead... it was all going so well have cancelled everything and am stumbling round the house feeling drugged...

Just out of interest, those of you with screaming babies, have you tried baby massage? I know that B has a particular scream/melt down cry that she does when she has a sore tummy and needs to poo. I tried massaging her tummy a bit the other day and it obviously did the trick. She calmed down and then starting giggling at me.

I used to do it with DS1, don't seem to ever have time with Orbit! DS1 did always seem to like it though.

It is hard to find the time when you already have older children to look after, isn't it? Poor DD1 isn't get much attention today as B fed all morning after her jabs.

We accepted an offer on our flat on saturday! Now we have to find a place to live and that is harder than I imagined it would be. I feel a bit awkward as I'm going to view a house tomorrow but the owner was in my first time mums group. I'm not that keen on the house but it 'ticks all the boxes' so feel obliged to look at it. The house I want isn't on the market anymore. It was for sale a while back but it came off the market having never sold. I am desperate for that house as it would be so perfect. I have an estate agent on the case...

I have decided to stop moaning about things with DH and start sorting things out starting with this. Let me know if you have any ideas. I feel very brave as people are very honest over on the relationships board.

Also, we are going to have a new wedding ring blessed for DH soon, hopefully when it is B's baptism. Any ideas what I should wear. I'd love to wear a dress but they aren't very BF friendly. We are having a picnic in the park afterwards so I need to be able to sit down on a picnic rug without flashing my knickers at the vicar. In other words, nothing too short in the skirt!

Damn, forgot to put the link in. One sec.....

Over here.

I clearly need more chocolate. Oh, and to get rid of a blocked duct that I got from stupidly sleeping on my tummy.

Bit of a whiney x post all the typo police have fun if you're lurking.

Sam looks like he's trying to feed to go through the night 3 days ago we had a bad night feeding like a demon all afternoon till late. Day after he was so tired he went to sleep a bit hungry I think. Yesterday was the same as the first day and today is identical

Can anyone tell me how soon it takes for your boobs to catch up with a sudden switch in demand like this? He's crying his heart out and he only EVER cries if he's been hurt e.g. injection or hungry. He's draining boobs left right and because I'm a mutant centre Mummy is very upset because Sam is upset!

VeryCloseToTearsTiggaxx

Oh Tigga, the best thing you can do is keep feeding. It can take a few days and they can get a bit of a sore tummy during those days. If you want to boost your supply quicker try any of the following:

-Express off any milk after a feed to get extra stimulation
-take a bath together
-skin-to-skin feeds
-carry Sam in a sling all the time
-drink and eat plenty
-go to bed and just feed him lots whilst resting lots

Tigga - I'm with you here! Am feeling quite down about it at the moment. E sleeps 12 hours every night but is so hungry during the day. I started giving her a top up bottle about 4 pm every day as I couldn't cope with her demands but she has started refusing this now and I am sat here feeding her and have been since 3.30 pm I know there's not enough milk but she's starving and keeps going. I need to get dinner on and give the older DC's some attention, I also have wet washing on the sofa, where it has been since 2.30, before I went to pick the older two up.

Thanks for the tips Swali - I will nick those too!

Good luck Tigga xx

BB - I think that having a baby puts a strain on everyone's relationship and what you are describing sounds entirely normal tbh.

Swali - don't get me onto looking for houses. Selling we found the easy bit. Currently we are in a 'chain' which is about to fall through because the people above us can't find anywhere. We went looking this weekend again and omg the utter squalor that people live in just appalls me! (and I am not OCD about cleaning at all) I think the favourite of the weekend was the semi with 8 labradors and red anygliptor (sp? lol) wallpaper on the ceilings. I have a nasty feeling we are either going to have to stretch our budget further or end up pulling out. It really isn't easy atm!
Everything crossed on the nice house we are meant to be buying.

In terms of controlled crying I think it depends on the baby and why they are crying. Hannah is a coniving little madam and is perfectly capable of crying for attention and to get her own way. Therefore, we did insist on putting her to bed and at first she did cry. However, she doesn't cry at all when she is put to bed awake now as she accepts that we won't take any notice. I found that if I rocked her to sleep she woke the second she was put into the cot and it was a vicious circle. However, if a baby is crying because he/she is distressed for some reason then it isn't going to work. OMG am I a cruel mother

She is in her own room now, because she doesn't like sleeping in a moses basket as she likes to stretch out and it is too small. Our bedroom is too small for a full sized cot.

Has anyone heard from Springy? I am a little bit worried about her.

Oh and finally, I went to the docs today and have pnd.

sorry about the PND brett - I had it with Ds1 although I didn't realise til later on. Hope things get easier for you ((hugs))
I've not felt down at all really until today and feel a bit overwhelmed. So much to do and DH not here much this week. Good friend had a baby yesterday and it's made me realise E isn't newborn anymore (although she is kinda more fun now!)

I am worried about Springy too, and soontobe and Kitty.

Brett - sorry about the PND - what has the dr suggested?

Am worried about Kitty as she hasn't responded to ANY of my texts or been on - hope she is ok!

I think I am the one that is too clingy to put K in his own room - that and he is on the second floor and we are on the third so it feels a bit far away!

K doesn't do controlled crying, he does, crying to say 'hey I want your attention" and then tantrum cried that never stop - he is a stubborn little man!

Hello everyone,

I have tried to catch up but not sure that I can remember all the thrills and spills in you marvellous women's lives...

Swali, the stuff about the harness coming off is very moving.

Brett, sorry about the PND. Very best wishes for your recovery.

BB - glad you are enjoying the sunshine... mostly...

All with DP problems - maybe I shouldn't offer advice as I am no expert but would just say: if it isn't working and if you need more support SAY SO because they are not mind readers, certainly not when what they might read will not be in their interests to be preternaturally aware of, and you could waste your whole life being a martyr wishing a man would take the hint. Sorry about gross gender generalisations, but something I realised at work was: when you are managing men, they will assume everything is fine unless you tell them so in no uncertain terms. It is nasty having to do it but the alternative is to suffer.

A thought came to me today about self-sacrifice: there is a limit to the extent to which you should do this, not just in your own interests but those of your children. The logic of self-sacrifice is: my children are so important, more important than me. However, the power of parent (especially same sex parent) as role model is so strong that they will not read it as such; they will identify with you to the extent that what they read is: people like us (for I am in the same mould as my parent) do not matter - she doesn't matter, clearly, so neither do I.

So all take very good care of yourselves and treat yourselves as important people who matter very much, which you are.

Hello folks. DD continues to get better, but still is very tired.

I've been to the doctor today and my ear is still a mess - the antibiotics haven't worked, so I have to have some different antibiotic drops (which no chemist seems to have in stock due to a manufacturing problem) and also go to the hospital on Thursday to subject myself to something worrying called 'ear toilet', which made me to a second take in the surgery, but which simply means hoovering out the ear canal with a special micro hoover.

All good fun.

PS Is anyone else starting to get scared of swine flu? What do bf mothers do if they get it??

I'm getting worried, Boff. More worried about my girls getting it though. It's been a horrible few days with DD being ill and the thought of swine flu sends shivers down my spine.

Yep, slightly nervous over here too. A child at DS1s nursery has got it, apparently they haven't been in to nursery since they fell ill, but still. We were on holiday last week so he might have escaped infection from that particular child, but I think it's pointless thinking that we can escape being exposed to it.

Just have to hope none of us gets it too badly.

There are several cases in our local school. No doubt DD1 will come into contact with siblings at toddler groups. You certainly can't escape it!

I lost baby no 3 to flu in 1999 whilst pg so flu strikes a chill into my heart. The whole thing was awful and I have never recovered.

Good evening

Ellen's classes have finished for the summer now. Her singing and dancing is just so cute, i'm going to miss them as much as her.

Boff - I can't begin to imagine what that must have been like for you. I'm so sorry.

Schulte - How did you and H cope with her injections? Holly has her second lot on Friday.

Purple - Poor you. Did you go to your meeting?

Surprise - Bless Evie and her cake.
How's your head?

Kali - Is A any better now? Don't feel crap, you are coping admirably. 10 times is tough as hell.

BB - That's so adorable that K likes the sea. Holly loves her bath and hates getting out. I can't wait to see what she will be like in the sea.
Looking forward to seeing the pics.

Swali - Congrats on accepting an offer. Fingers crossed for the dream house.

Dawn - How was Sam going down tonight?

Brettgirl - Sorry about the PND, I wish you strength to beat the bugger.

Gosh, I hope Kitty is okay BB.

Boff - An ear toilet sounds vile but I do hope it helps.

Puzzle - my head is fine now thank you

Boff - that's awful, sorry to hear that. Swine flu is all over the DS's school - great! I am scared of it too, especially with little E, and me and DS1 having asthma.

BB- enjoy your hols!

Got to go to bed, am so tired everything is going blurred...night all x

Morning.

Well I am up and the girls are still asleep - what's that all about?

H was okay with her jabs but see here - any ideas?

Boff, so sorry to hear about the baby you lost - I saw it on another thread too Ear toilet, hmmmm - hope it will help.

Brett, sorry about the PND but at least you've recognised it fairly early so hopefully will get the help you need.

Yep I am worried about the swine flu although DH is convinced we've all had it already a few weeks ago. I asked the HV if she knew anything about young babies and swine flu i.e. does it affect them very badly but she had no idea. Let's hope we all get away lightly.

One of DD1's friends has rubella despite having had the MMR jab... what is it with viruses this summer???

Hi everyone,
A woke me up at 1am and 5am: he's going for shorter and shorter stretches. I really, really hope it's a growth spurt, as I feel exhausted.

I feel strangely unconcerned about swine flu, perhaps because there are no cases here yet. But we left Réunion just as a horrendous chikungunya epidemic struck, and I remember trying to protect DS1 from mosquito bites and wondering how I'd do so once he was mobile. It was v scary. I left 2 PG friends behind and no one knew the effects the disease could have on the foetus or on BF newborns with ill mothers, as it is a third world disease so no research had been done.
In your case, Boff, if the swine flu is reviving terrible memories that must make it so very much worse.

Off for breakfast, my Mum is arriving this morning...