April 2009 - Chapter 3 - Let us round up the stragglers

[PuzzleRocks]

Ta da.

Ladies,

Those of you who have started putting your baby down awake, did sleep get worse before it got better? Also, did it result in some tears or just a bit of talking etc?

Evening swali

To be honest, we do it more as a gradual thing. when orbit looks tired and starts yawning, we take him upstairs and put him down after a cuddle, when he's settled and quiet but not sleeping yet. if he cries or fusses, I pick him up again and cuddle him until he's quiet again, then put him down. repeat until he's off, sometimes he does have to fall asleep before being put down, sometimes not.

it usually works best for the first nap of the day, when he's fresh, and gets harder throughout the day. He gets fed to sleep at bedtime in the evening (although at the moment he's very unsettled in the evenings, see my earlier posts)

I never leave him to cry or fuss for more than thirty seconds or a minute, as I find he just gets worked up and then harder to get to sleep.

We did the same thing with DS1 and he is fine at going to sleep without any help.

HTH

x

Evening all

Puzzle - your girls are clearly destined to be supermodels Oscar is on the 75th percentile for height but the 98th (ish) for weight... he's very solid. Not sure how much he weighs at the mo as didn't go to baby clinic on thursday - will go this week and report back.

Boff - 3 weeks of ear infection?! really hope you feel better soon.

Auld - glad you're feeling a bit better... fingers crossed you're over the worst...

Swali - we've had some tears, but mainly at naptime rather than at bedtime, and it gets better each time we do it. I don't leave him in his cot to cry - with the pick up put down thing it means that you are always cuddling them to calm them down if they cry... I am a totally wuss with crying, I can't cope with more than about 10 seconds of it I think I'm a bit of a wussy mum generally - I'm sure FIL thinks I'm making a rod for my back. But it seems to be working - he went down awake tonight.

Fingers crossed for some sleep for tired april mums tonight x x

Swali, I just realised that Felix was looking tired after his bath, which is around the time I put the other two to bed anyway, so I put him in the cot in the nursery to see what would happen, and realised after a couple of nights that he had developed a bedtime. No real effort on my part. Sorry if I sound smug. I should say he is my best ever sleeper out of the four and I have had my share of angst in the past.

DD's bedroom is still looking really good, and has now been scented with room fragrance at her initiative. She has also sorted out her dressing table and there are two pretty tea light holders flickering away there for decoration purposes while she relaxes up there. Much more of this and I will need a sherry and a sit down.

Quick question - how many of you still have your babies in with you? And when did you/are you planning to move them to their own rooms? We're considering moving O to his own room for night time sleeping as he's getting too big for his crib (little fatty) and we can't fit the cot in our room... feel a bit nervous about it though... actually that's a lie, i feel bloody terrified about it.

Felix starts off in the cot in the nursery, and then if he wakes up in the night/early morning he finishes off in the crib in our room. We use a baby alarm if he's in the nursery. I am not nervous at all tbh. I always wake up at the first grumble anyway.

Orbit sleeps in a cot in our room - it's a squash but we can just manage it. DS1 was in with us until he was 9 months old, not sure how long Orbit will be, he's a jolly noisy sleeper! But I love having him there

Puzzle nothing yet, put probably something as rock and roll as pizza and a movie or a meal at a fairly local Italian restraunt

Swali we try to get him down for 1930 but he's feeding so hard at the moment it was 2100 tonight. I hope my milk builds up soon to cope with this or the old norks are going to end up shreded. Pity I can't move the missed feed milk production between 1600 and 1900

Oh and small rant. Why, after I've done a shed load of research and have finally started to trust my own bloody instincts does the not-so at the moment dp try and undermine them?

If CC works for you fine, I won't try it. I think for me and my baby it's cruel. I've seen to many peer reviewed studies that tell me if I leave him to cry he'll end up a crying baby and right now he only cries if he's hungry and I haven't caught the signs! 'D'P on the other hand hasn't read or looked at a blessed thing but because his family - all of whom ceased raising babies over 20 bloody years ago - tell him that letting a baby cry is a good thing and I'm tired (mostly because I'm tired if I'm honest) he things letting ds cry is ok. I can't and won't do it. Either he trusts my instincts or he doesn't. I keep trying to explain that at 12 weeks (bear in mind he was 5 weeks early) old he only has needs not wants but he doens't fecking listen!!! Enourmous GRRRRRR face

I know he only does this because he cares about my welfare but he still doesn't get the fact the ds comes first, now and always. I'll read this tomorrow and realise that sleep deprevation made me unreasonable

VeryTiredAndGoingToBedSoonTiggaxx

I am not a big fan of controlled crying. I am a big fan of easing children into independence when they show developmental tendencies in that direction.

WFH - Our finances are very far from being sorted out but i'm good at juggling.
And you're right, you are knackered. Exhaustion does odd things to us, you musn't feel guilty for having thoughts.

Bicnod - Either that or basketball players.
We put Ellen in a cot at 4 months in her own room but her bedroom was opposite ours and we could see her cot from our bed.
Holly is still in our bed and, being that she may be my last, probably will be until she is 5.
Do you have monitors?

Dawn - Sounds good to me. I can't remember my last night out.
I hope you do get some sleep. YANBU but as you say he probably is concerned for you. Hopefully he will see that you both need to be singing from the same hymn sheet. It's difficult when families stick their oars in.

Bonjour

Bicnod, good question and one that I have been asking myself. DD1 moved to her own room at 3 1/2 months old, but it's just next to ours so the cot really only moved a few meters further away from our bed.

H is just as noisy at night as DD1 was so either I'll have to keep sleeping downstairs myself, or she'll move soon too. I would love to keep her in with us but if I get no sleep, that's no good for any of us really. This week, I will put the travel cot up in DD1's room and move H there after her night feed. I hope she won't wake her big sister up with all her shuffling!

Auld, Boff and everyone else who's unwell, hope you get better quickly. Ear infections and mastitis - shudder - not what you need when you have a tiny baby to look after!

H is having her first jabs today and I am scared

morning all!

just popping in quickly (as usual)
had a weird evening yesterday. I felt fine then suddenly I couldn't get up off the toilet and i think my insides were trying to escape through my ASS. I have never had diarrhea that bad before. lasted about an hour. sent DH on an emergency trip for immodium and i;ve been ok since then.
so the question is this: i'm meant to be at a meeting this morning. Should I go?

I wouldn't - what if it starts again?

Morning all!

Interesting fact of the day .... I had my first post-baby period start on the the exact day of my last period before I found out I was pregnant last year - 10th July! How spooky is that!!

My friend had her baby yesterday, can't wait to see him!

Evie just grabbed my cake while I was eating it and promptly shoved her creamy jammy fist in her mouth - that'll teach me to eat Victoria Sponge for breakfast!! Was a bit worried but she only had a tiny bit and was so funny, she licked her lips for about 10 minutes after!

Got lots and lots of housework today but got a headache

Will catch up properly while I have my lunch later but it seems quite quiet around here at the moment!

Heavens no. What if you give it to everyone there?

The rudest man in the world is currently here fixing our oven. He's had the oven door to fix the heat proof glass for over a week now and every time I ask for it back we have the same conversation:

Him - Well I've got to replace the fan motor, so you can't use the oven anyway, no point me doing two jobs I might as well do them both at once

Me - Yes but the door is useful when using the grill, plus I'd like to use the oven on non-fan setting

Him (grudgingly) - Well you could, yes

Me - So can I have it back then?

Him -

GIVE ME MY OVEN DOOR!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now he's muttering about how the people that put the oven in have wired it into a socket, and they shouldn't have done that.

GIVE ME MY OVEN DOOR! I WANT TO EAT MEALS THAT AREN'T MADE ON THE HOB, FOR A CHANGE!

Surprise.....mmmmmmmmm cake. Omnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnom

WFH - you have my sympathies with not being able to use the oven. We didn't have an oven all over Christmas - was hell! An element had gone but we didn't want to fix it ourselves as it was still under guarantee so we had to wait ages for someone to come out! - hope it gets sorted soon!

Had the worst night last night since A was born!

He was in a lovely mood yesterday - very smiley and easy going. I put him down to sleep at about 9pm then at 10pm everything changed and he had a gigantic hissy fit and started screaming for no apparent reason. He hardly ever properly screams, but last night he really went for it. Nothing I could do could calm him down. Happened out of the blue. Is it possible that 3 month olds can have temper tantrums????

He then had me up during the night over 10 times and today I feel like the walking dead. I feel like crying . A is now in a completely grump because he's tired and has developed this highly aggravating whiny cry. He doesn't have a fever and I can't see anything wrong with him.

Any ideas??? Is it his gums? Is it just a random thing babies do from time to time?

I'm so tired I can't focus my eyes properly.

Where has my lovely smiley baby
gone??????????

Sorry for the miserable post.

On wednesday he gets his first lot of jabs....

Feeling like the crappiest mother of the century. I wish I had some family living here - even my mum would do!

Oh my word I have 8 pages to catch up on!!

Springy Kali - I thought me and DH were great but have just realised how much we have argued recently and how strained things are over here - don't get me wrong we are still v ery much in love but I think sometimes we don't like each other very much because of the stresses of having a LO we take it out on each other

Springy Im a 6 but as I type this I am sat by the pool and my sister has K!

Nutty love the hair!! LOL at DD1 - at this very moment K is wearing a backwards cap looking grumpy as - maybe they could get together and hang out together! oooh sports day how did you stop yourself marching over there and telling them what for - you are a lovely mummy - (hugs) for DH - sorry have no helpful advice but perhaps just leave hm with the girls one night when he is supposed to be going to football and dont give him a choice and see how he likes it!

Swali at your DH! Also - they dont approve of bfing in public over here but they can all bopp off - my baps are out all over the place (they were out on the beach and at dinner yesterday - if they dont like it they can look away or leave the room fgs!! you should not be made to feel uncomfortable in your own home - and you tell DH that - or give me your number and I will - am just down the road from you in portsmouth southsea so if you ever need to escape you can come bf in my house all you like!!

Frekkles I love you - we have no routine either - I am ignoring all of you who do because we are NO WHERE near one!

Bleu - K is teething really badly his gums are all white and red, he is dribbling all the time, gnawing everything and you can just see a couple of the teeth waiting to pop through the skin - doctor tole me he was teething a month ago though and nothing through yet just lots of pain for him - e got some great powder from Boots - Ashton and Parsons which he loves as Dentinox is from 3 months onwards so was too early when we started

Maths I have no idea, K clamps shut on my nipples and I have to scream out in pain- he has also started grabbing chunks of my boob and twisting when he does it!

B52 sorry about the murmue fingers crossed everything is ok

Puzzle - posted - egg white fixes everything but LOL a gingerbread teddy!

Schultes I love your daily routine!!

Boff how is DD? I had a really bad kidney infection about 2 years ago and was almost hospitalised and honestly the pain was worse than childbirth!

Kali -K has temper tantrum alot - - I can tell the difference as soon as he starts - mostly by his facial expression and the fact that he throws his head back!

Sorry if I have missed anything

So holiday got off to a great start then we drove down to the coast and broke down had nightmare villa problems (which has only made us more determined to buy a place of our own out here asap)but pretty much sorted now and starting the holiday!

Things are fine, living with in-laws is hard - they have different views and believe K should be fed everytime he cries!

He LOVES the sea, have some great photos that I will post - but loves it, cries when he comes out - loves the pool too but not as much - he is browner than me with factor 50 on thanks to his fathers olive skin and is very popular with the family!

Holiday is good, my mum and sister have been my lifeline, things with DH were tough for a while but we are all good now - weather is boiling-but nice only spending about 2-3 hours a day outbecause of visiting and keeping K out of the main sun!

Developments - k started giggling a lot, trying to sit up and rolling everywhere - everything he grabs goes in his mouth - the past 2 days have been hell with teething but he seems ok today - haven't tried calpol yet but might do if he has another day like yesterday - where all he wanted to do was feed and sleep ON ME!!

ANyway we have internet access now so willt ry and catch up more regularly!

Hope everyone is ok - I;m off for a dip

Oh hey Trista - and Kali - you are a great mother!

'I am off for a dip'. BB.

Enjoy your holiday!

Morning all.

BB, sounds as if you are having a lovely holiday, hope the marital trouble isn't too serious. I think TBH that my relationship with DH really suffered after we had DS1 and then other things compounded the strain and I don't know how to get it back on track.

Tigga, we had the same problem with DS1. DH insisted we use CC and I hated it and cried. I think one of my 1st ever posts on MN was after a particularly bad evening. I have little advice, except that if he thinks it is for your benefit you can try and explain that it is not beneficial to you to leave your baby crying.

Kali, I have no idea what is wrong with your wee one, am sending supportive vibes (useless, I know).

I am feeling better, but still a bit shaky. The combination of raging fever, manic BFing and not eating for 36hrs means that I have now dropped below my pre-PG weight . But for everyone who is hating me, you can take consolation in the fact that Alex has stopped sleeping through and is waking up to feed at 1am and 6am. I tried the dummy at 1am, hoping he was not hungry, but he was having none of it. After several proper nights, it is hard to go back to such a nasty regime!