Dec 08 mums - embuggerance to it all - sleep or no sleep we love our babes

[waitinggirl]

i hope people don't mind, i took the bull by the horns and did it. title a bit naff, but more important the thread exists rather than search for a better title. hope i haven't stolen anyone's thunder...

Obviously meant to bookmark this thread not the old thread earlier. Oops, not very clever!

arti I would go for it myself on the sleep consultant front if I thought she seemed good.
What does the 100% success rate mean though. They sleep 12 hrs but for how long? My friend did some form of CC as she was going back to work and it worked for a bit then just as she went back to work again her DS started waking up again.

jj that sleeping sounds amazing!

daisy sorry your night sounds horrific! I hope you have a better night tonight. DS's bum was sore a few days ago, we gave him time playing around in the nuddie after his bath every day to try and dry it up, I also tried to make sure it was really dry after I changed him as well. Not sure if this is what helped but it is better now.

jj on the napping close to bedtime, DS goes to bed 7ish, if he is tired at around 5 I will let him have half an hr sleep and accept that he may not actually go to sleep for the night til a bit later, but if it's later than that I risk him being grouchy and keep him up.

Still not weaning properly here, tried him on some mashed banana and he pulled a face and spat it out. Right gonna post this now, wrote it ages ago but got distracted so sorry for any x-posts

Oh and I forgot to say, JJ I thought I knew all the sleepy signs then the other day it was 4pm and DS2 hadn't had a third sleep yet, if he doesn't have last sleep he is a nightmare by 5.30 and so cranky and overtired that he is difficult to get to sleep at 6pm. So anyway I just put him in his cot at 4pm even though he was giggling and alert, no yawns no eye rubbing, and within seconds of putting him down he was asleep!!! So much for reading sleep signals.

Oh and Daisy Metanium is the best for teething nappy rash, you can get it presribed. Next time you notice the teething start using it to reduce the nappy rash. However, it is really difficult to avoid teething nappy rash, DS1 never got nappy rash apart from when he was teething badly. I didn't use any prophelactic nappy creams but would pop some metanium on as soon as I noticed he was getting crotchety with teething and his bott got a little red. I also tried another one that had chamomile in it and it was thick like Vaseline but I can't remember what it was called it was good too. But Metanium sorts it out literally overnight.

arti - have you heard of millpond children's sleep clinic? google them and have a look if not. they have a book - you can get it on their website, definitely, but maybe on amazon. last thursday a woman at my children's centre said she was trained by millpond and lent me the book - and over the weekend, our friends told us they used a millpond consultant to cure their non-sleeping daughter. they look like they know what they are on about, not espousing one solution, but a range of solutions. 2 mentions in 2 days - that was pretty spooky - am reading the book now. maybe that could help as well? as regards a consultant - i think i would feel weird handing her over to someone else, but maybe that is the right thing, who knows??? i think i would want to do it myself. i have no idea about controlled crying in the flesh (not gone there yet), but it is such an emotive term - maybe it is easier to think of it as training your dd to get out of a bad habit? i don't know. i'm sure we'll be there soon with you.

madam has slightly dropped off her 50% curve on weight - am sure this is because i am not feeding her solids yet. anyone else holding out for the 6 months mark (even if it is only about 10 days away)??? sometimes i feel a bit silly, but i do like a deadline to meet. also, aside from waking often at night (only 3 times last night - 11, 2 and 4.30), she doesn't seem hungry. am asking dh not to tell mil that she has dropped off her 50% line - don't want her to start lecturing me about effing formula and solids again.

sl DS had a good half hour after his bath on a big fluffy towel letting his botty dry out. Slapped a load of Sudocrem on then nappy. He didn't seem as bad as earlier so maybe the air has helped a little. I didn't get chance to get out again for the Metanium, so I'll go first thing tomorrow. Providing my DC's allow me more than 3 hours sleep tonight!

WG apart from telling you MIL to stick it up her own arse (sorry a bit rude) BF has more calories than FF and solids actually should not replace milk for the first couple of months because they have less calories and nutrients so would actually be bad for weight gain. DS2 is also just under the 50th and started on the 91st but is happy alert and developing well so not worried (luckily I don't have your MIL though).

Wg similar with my MIL here too.
she started making the cattle analogies again re weaning. They wean in a few days when the mother tells them they can't have any milk apparently, and I am going to have to do it sooner or later. Surely that means they do it when their instincts tell them to, my finely honed mothering instincts are telling me not to yet so she can sod off!
So wg yes I am holding off, but not really fretting about the exact 6 month date, but DS just doesn't seem interested and whatever I feed him seems to make its way back out, and he doesn't really seem to "get" solid food. Is this a sign he isn't ready yet? Or does he just need more practice?

Thanks for all your advice on the sleep consultant. In general I agree with Verso that sleep deprivation is torture and a few bouts of crying are likely to be much less distressing than a stressed and exhausted mother, however I can't quite get myself to agree to the consultant. We did CC with DD1 when she was 8 months old and it nearly killed me (but was very effective). Most of the time I want to take the Trace approach to the sleep situation and accept that getting-up is my job as mother and is not the end of the world. However, DH points out that I am not that accepting at 3am and often sob at him with tiredness. Also I keep getting ill and he reckons my immune system is crying out for sleep and it is not fair on the whole family for me to be so tired and ill. I do see his point but I just don't know. I have to admit that our nights are nowhere near as bad as Indith or Trace's so that makes me think I am just being weak.

Daisy we are also suffering with nappy rash here. DD2 has had a very robust bottom so far but in the last few days she has gained a tooth and lost that robustness. Like Veggie I have found teething always causes it, DD1 only ever had a rash in the 48 hours around the appearance of a new tooth. Metanium is a miracle cure (I must buy some more tomorrow).

JJ - your nights sound amazing now. We are the opposite to you. DD2 wakes a few times at night but naps like an angel (one hour from 9-10, then 2 hours from 12-2 followed by a 15 min cat-nap at about 4.30pm).

Lal - lovely to see you. Sorry to hear your DS is ill. What is wrong with him? How is your DH finding being back at work?

DD2 ate a whole sweet potato today . I cut it into handy-to-hold size pieces and placed it all in front of her while I pottered round the kitchen. She slurped away at it for about an hour at which point I realised her plate was empty. Quite a lot went on her face, thighs and head. And some was smeared on DD1, but the majority must have gone in her tummy. Do you guys think it is OK to let them eat as much as they please?

Hi folks, just a quick one to say hello, Arti I feel for you, I have considered CC at various times, (esp for naps when I slightly resent pushing him round the park for 2 hrs a day) but am not at that stage yet. I don't dismiss it out of hand (although I hate the idea instinctively) but I just think that you know when you're ready for it. And only you know if you've reached that stage yet.
Oh, and on the eating front, T likes to stuff his face silly and goes beserk if I leave a millisecond in between spoonfuls but I try and just give him a tiny amount at a time. My feeling though would be that they probably don't have the concept of "full" yet - but as am doing purees rather than BLW I imagine it's a bit different...
Daisy you poor poor thing, I really feel for you, really hope tonight is better.
WG, my best friend went to Millpond at 6 months as her DS was unable to sleep without swaddle or dummy, and they basically recommended CC, she swears by it, they do some "tailored" plans for a couple of hundred quid I think, so if you do go down that route I guess it would be on the recommendation of someone who had looked at your issues rather than the blanket advice you get in books.
Weight wise we seem to be having the opposite problem, T is now the fattest little butterball there is, bites my hand off the moment he sees the spoon heading in his direction, am hoping he loses it through crawling, walking etc...
Gotta go, more later. Oh, but for now, does anyone fancy going to London Zoo with me n Pingu? Trying to set a date soon.

Arti - Really quickly, but I feel for you on the sleep. Our nights are currently nowhere near as bad as some others, but they go through good and bad patches and had been really shit as of late. We implemented a bit of a baby boot camp a couple of weeks ago per the Baby Whisperer's plan for 4 month+ old babies. The results haven't been quite as drastic as BW makes out - i.e. he isn't sleeping 12 hours straight - but pretty good if I reflect on where we were. It was 3 hard days of doing her pick up/put down technique (which we modified to suit) and by the end he was off the dummy, sleeping in his cot instead of hammock, settling himself easily at naps and bedtime. Now 10 days later he had 2 two hour naps today (probably a one off but wow!) and he is taking a dream feed and waking just once around 3 for another feed.

All that to say, if you really feel uncomfortable handing over to the consultant, you could give 3-5 days a go with another technique such as Baby Whisperer. This is basically the plan we followed: www.babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=69369.0

But also completely understand being at the end of your tether and needing sleep for the health of you and your family. Your DD (and my DS!) need to learn how to sleep well for their own healthy development.

Re: overeating. The last two days my DS has had solids at three meals, including caning 2 whole Wheetabixes and half a pear at dinner tonight! I figure they should eat as much as they want as long as it is healthy stuff?

hello. Thanks WG for the new thread
arti that's a tough one re the CC. I was speaking to a HV today (yet another different one with yet another set of solutions...) who talked about sleep training, including CC but said that 6 months is a bit too young to start it and that they don't recommend it until at least 7 or 8 months. Her other helpful advice included:
trying to get her to take a bottle (after I told her no-one has ever managed to get her to take a bottle)
offering her solids later in the evening, eg 6pm instead of 5pm
getting some teething granules in case the wakings are teething related (after I told her I already have teething granules and that her teeth don't seem to be the problem)...
anyway she suggested that we wait until the summer hols (as DH is a teacher) then tackle it by dh trying to settle her when she wakes. At the mo I always go to her as he is at work the next day and also I'm the only one who can feed her so it seems stupid for him to go, but I guess in a month or so we could try to teach her not to feed at night? She said tell yourself when you are and aren't willing to feed, eg, any wakings before midnight she can BF but anything from 12-6 she can't. No idea what to do really!
She also talked about weaning - I said I'd started giving her purees three times a day but that she rarely takes more than a cube or 2 if I'm lucky. She wasked what I gave - I said just fruit/veg - and she said I should be giving fish, meat and dairy too. She said in the 'olden days' you had to progress slowly but now it's almost straight to 'stage 2' so she can basically eat whatever we have. (not sure you can puree Chinese takeaway!) How I'm supposed to get her to eat meat and fish when I'm lucky if she'll swallow her veggies I don't know! She likes to put things in her mouth but doesn't really eat much of it. I think she's eating it then I find it all in her lap or on the floor! I feel at a bit of a loss really. It's as though they make you wait till 6 months and warn against early weaning, and now that she's 6 months and 4 days she should be on 3 square meals and feeding herself and if I don't do it right she won't develop all the right facial muscles blah blah blah! She never wants breakfast because she's troughed all night, she's so distracted in the day she has crappy little BFs and tiny bits of puree, then no wonder she wants it at night. I've had to stop this post twice since starting it to go to her and feed her. Sorry I have really waffled there. My brain is just in such a muddle and i flit between being chilled about it and being really worried. grrrr. Crying again (her not me!) back soon...

ahh. I'm back. And she's done it - she's broken me and now I'm crying too I know it's crap for arti and indith and others but i do find it reassuring because I honestly don't know anyone in RL whose baby is such a poor sleeper. Seriously - I met a 6 week old today who goes 7-7!!! ANd he's BF!
Flippin eck she's crying again.

ok so now i'm bizarrely contorted so i can type while she feeds!
Another helpful hint from the HV was to do a dream feed. She asked when I went to bed, so I said as soon as P has fed around 9ish, so she said "you might find it helpful to pick her up and try to feed her in her sleep when you go to bed to see if she'll then sleep through till 4am" ??!!!! So what? she feeds, I put her in her cot, put my pjs on, get her back up and feed her again, we both go to sleep and she miraculously snoozes till 4?! Me thinks the HV was not listening to a word I was saying. She was one of those people who asks you a question but already has their next thing ready to say before you've finished your answer. My CPN said last week that I'm allowed to reduce my happy pills a bit at the end of the month, but dh thinks I should stay on them until a) I am getting more sleep and b) I've gone back to work. I think he's probably right.
I apologize for all the meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeness tonight. I think it's sometimes cathartic to type it out rather than stew it over. Thanks for letting me. I shall endeavour to be more positive in the morning...
On a brighter note my garden has received some TLC from me over the past few days and is looking decidedly happier A way to go yet but much less jungley than it was! My next door neighbour has put her house up for sale and I was worried our garden might lower the value of her home!
Well my monkey has just blessed me with a gummy grin so I think it's bed time for us both
I'll be back tomorrow thinking of someone other than my dull self
night night xxx

Oh Trace are you ok? I think your DH probably knows best in this situation so keep on those happy pills. My HV is like yours, she seems to just love the sound of her own voice. She has been a great lesson for me in how not to speak to patients. I think the rules on what to introduce when came from when they used to introduce solids at 3 months. However I would just give as you feel right, I kind of feel that meat is better introduced at 7 months but not sure why I think that maybe just to be sure their tummies are ready. DS2 loves chewing on food but so far I only give him something to try once a day and he doesn't really take much in. Oh and the research that was done that bought about the idea that feeding effected facial muscles has since been found to be seriously flawed and it isn't really drawn on anymore. Basically it was carried out on children with special needs and had no proper control group so can't be generalized to the population.

Night night and White light to all for a good nights sleep.

Hello all,

Been ages. Like the new thread title.

Well I'm so far behind I've just started Brideshead Revisited (the book though, not the series). So as it's a new thread I'll wipe the slate clean and pretend I don't have several weeks worth of catching up to do (apart from LadyT I have a friend near Hindhead who is due a visit - if I can arrange to be round there that weekend I will try & come to see your match. Never been to a cricket match before so it's about time I did. Btw I knew about it cos you mentioned it on here! ).

Right, where are we up to? Paris - I lived there for a while (long time ago now). We used to have someone on the thread who lived in Paris remember, right at the beginning? Wonder what became of her. Anyway, kayz if you've never been before I would just stick to the classics. A trip on a bateau-mouche along the Seine is lovely, especially if you have the boys with you. Go to Montmartre/Sacre-Coeur. And just have a wander round - if you're up for long walks the central bit of Paris is small enough to see loads on foot. If I had a day there I would walk from Trocadero to the Pantheon via the Champs-Elysees - a long walk but you will see loads of sights on the way. If you wanted to go to a museum & didn't fancy the Louvre, I'd recommend the Musee D'Orsay which is a light & airy converted train station with loads of impressionist paintings that you will recognise. Not sure how much fun it would be for the boys though. Having the same dilemma myself - thinking of going there for my birthday in November but will still be bf by then so would definitely have to take DD. Don't think it would be great for DS (or rather I don't think it would be great for me with DS in tow). Last time I went (must be at least 5 years ago) I stayed here - it was brilliant for the price and star rating, but it looks as if the prices have gone up (plus the exchange rate is rubbish now), although I doubt I booked direct with the hotel so it was probably cheaper.

trace sorry you're having a tough time at the moment - your HV is not helping either. Most of the ones I've met just trot out meaningless, poorly informed advice on autopilot. Do you have to see your HV? I have given them a wide berth this time round and if I had my time over again I would have done the same with DS.

spot when are you coming to see us? [folorn].

arti & MoM your babes are definitely getting the hang of this eating lark aren't they? I agree that they should eat as much as they like, especially if they are feeding themselves - they'll no doubt go days and weeks with barely an solids at some stage anyway, e.g. when poorly. I think their bodies can be trusted to know when they need more milk & less solids. DD has been tasting loads of stuff (including crisps the other day) but to my knowledge none of it has made it into her tummy yet, so I'm enjoying the last of her butter popcorn flavoured poo while I can.

Verso hope the interview went well.

wg are you talking about the 50th centile in your red book or on the bf charts? I have the WHO software (which you can get here if anyone's interested) - if you (or anyone else) would like me to work out DD's exact birth centile & current centile just let me have birth date, birthweight & current weight (in kilos). In any case I don't think it's a cause for concern if they are obviously healthy and happy. DD was born on 42nd centile or so and is now on the 12th or something like that and I am very happy with her development.

Must post some pics of Her Tininess soon actually. She gets more adorable by the day.

Sorry to hear that so many of you have been having shockers sleep-wise. I am very lucky with DD in general (not so much with DS), but I've been like kayz lately, i.e. awake all night even when the LOs are fast asleep. Very irritating.

Speaking of irritating, I have been a right old misery guts again lately. Have barely a civil word for DP at the moment, the poor soul. Spent last week at my mum's and it was a disaster. My mum is very much of the why-lend-a-hand-when-you-can-stand-around-and-criticise school of grandparenting. Normally I try to let it wash over me but I finally snapped at the 500th "you don't know you're born I had 5 of you and your dad never lifted a finger and you were always immaculately behaved and turned out blah blah bloody blah". Been feeling proper premenstrual - third month in a row now, but still no period.

Morning,

Another 3am start here, in the end I got up at 5 with DS2 because I think my tossing and turning woke him up.

RE.Paris, we are without the boys. They are having a holiday with my mum. So we are free to do what we want. I defintely want to go round the Louvre, except the guidebook I got from the library said it will take 9 months to see everything in there!!

Hope everyone is ok. Really struggling to keep up at the minute because all I do I try to stay awake all day.

Morning,

Trace I hope your okay hon. Don't worry about P only taking bits of feed either. DS is a BIG boy, so everyone expects him to be on full roast dinners morning noon and night but 2-3 spoons of veg/fruit are all he will take. He will have cheese on his cauliflower but thats it. I know DD was eating loads more by this stgae but if they are not that interested whta can you do??? I think to try and rush or push it might give them a fear of food, so go at P's pace and she will be fine.

RE: HV's Does everyone see their's regular? I haven't seen mine since DS's 8 week check (nor has he been weighed since then She did ring about a 'weaning' talk but I said I was busy DS was doing well blah blah and she just said to ring if I needed anything. So I won't see her till the 8 month check now.

Well I went to bed at 9pm last night I couldn't keep awake any longer. DS woke for a feed at midnight and...he's still asleep now. The boy goes from one extreme to the other! Wait I tell a lie just heard him sneeze he may be rousing. Best go and get him out of that nappy - I do hope its better......

Morning folks, poison sorry to hear you're in a grump, interfering parents and hormones will do that to you. I will come and make everything better - can't wait to see her tininess again too - will email dates again, sorry for previous flakiness.

Kayz, so sorry to hear you're going through such a sleepless phase, it must feel like evening already. . No advice I'm afraid, just deep sympathy and I hope it passes soon.

Daisy, big hurrah for DS's sleeping, hope his little bottom is a bit better today.

Trace, so sorry you were feeling really low again last night, I really hope your night was better. Sounds like your DH is talking sense about the pills. And please don't apologise about the "me post", that's what we're all here for, and when I think about the number of supportive, helpful posts you've had I'd say you were due several weeks-worth of "me" posts. You're having a shocker of a time right now, I just wish I could do something to help.

Mom, that link was really interesting, I have the Secrets of the Baby Whisperer but not the problem solving one. I would quite like to try PuPD for T's naps, but I'd like to make sure i'm doing it right, would you mind explaining a bit about how it works? Do you just pick them up when they cry and put them back down when they stop? I tried a version of it before but I maybe didn't persist long enough as it just got him v worked up and did my back in! But it would be worth it if it was a way of helping him to self-settle without leaving him to cry.

Right, sounds like he's done one of his triangular poos, back later.

Bottom Update...Still red but not as bad as yesterday. Didn't cry when I changed him. Off to shops in a moment to get some metanium.

Feeling much better and more positive today after some sleep so I'm going to share it round and I am sending positive vibes to everyone, who is struggling on the sleep front...this too shall pass

Hello,
Realised my last post didn't make much sense.
Basically MIL was going on about how cattle get weaned, apparently in a matter of days because the mother refused them milk. And MIL said I would "have to do it sooner or later"...well yes...d'uh...but he doesn't seem that interested at the moment!

Basically when I try and feed him anything he doesn't thrust it out with his tongue but he equally doesn't seem to transfer it instinctively to the back of his mouth and swallow it, and it comes back out again. Do you think this means he is not ready, or is this normal? I am not in a hurry (he is 6 months next thursday) but not sure if he remains as he is I should be pushing it in a couple of weeks. My instincts (ha, read laziness gene) say to wait a bit.

trace sorry you are so down. I would really try not to worry about the weaning stuff....and I am sure the HV is just trying to help for your sake on the sleep front, not worry you about P? Obviously she was clearly not listening about the dream feed bit though, silly woman. As people have said milk is meant to be the primary source of nutrition until a year so try not to worry too much about how much and what at this stage? I know that is going to be hard, I can already feel myself getting worried too, and I haven't started yet! I am trying to look at the 6 month thing and everything goes as a good thing, re meat, dairy, etc. I.e. once I start weaning at 6 months almost everything goes so i can't mess up if you see what I mean! Though I will be starting on fruit and vegetables obviously, but he can have tastes of almost anything! Anyway I hope you are feeling more cheerful today.

daisy hooray for more sleep and better bottoms. Oh and no, I haven't seen the HV either. Well i spoke to one the other week at the clinic but they didn't say much, and if I didn't get E weighed i don't think they would have phoned to check he was ok or anything.

Spot, triangular poo? Please explain.

Sorry for all those not sleeping even though their little ones are as well, I do that now and again and I hate it.

pd good to hear from you and greetings to her tininess. Hope you cheer up soon, though your grump at your mum sounds justified!

The triangular poo thing is when it's really hard and solid and because of the shape of his bottom and nappy when I find it it looks like a piece of Toblerone

Morning all. Trace another thing I was thinking about the HV is they always want to fix things. Sometimes I think mums just need someone to talk al themselves and just vent. They should I think before they talk at us and try to fix things, they should instead just ask 'what do you want to happen?'. I think most mums might just say nothing just wanted to whine.

Hi PD lovely to see you. I have to admit your talk of your mum did make me giggle. Mine is so similar, but often pops in that she also looked after her sick husband. I do feel sorry for her but I just flately refuse to pick up every sad situation that has happened in my life and dwell on it like she does. I'm sure she doesn't wish a difficult life on me but she seems to resent me for having a nice life. I
sometime wander if she would have been the same if my dad was still alive, and I think she would.

SL I think you are being so sensible with the weaning, I really admire your attitude and wish so much that I had had the same confidence with DS1. DS2 is a very different baby as far as putting things in his mouth and food, but then I am not doing purees and he is older than DS1 was when I started solids with him. But I think even with all that in hindsight DS1 was like your E, just not up for it yet. I dont think it's slow development or you not picking up the signs I just think some babies are different and want to start things at different times. DS1 was never a very oral baby he was more into sight and touch to explore things, whereas DS2 just puts everything straight in his mouth so it seems obvious that he would be up for exploring food earlier. Even now DS1 will look at foods for a bit, even chocolate before eating, whereas his friends often shove it straight into their mouths.

Your MIL SL is hilarious, what planet is she from cows! For goodness sake, we used to breed our milker so that we could have fresh milk at home and I never remember this 4 day wean thing, I know dad used to mill her for months and months after the calves were born and she would have needed to be still feeding the calf to keep the milk up. Also cows have 3 stomachs and they eat grass so a little different to humans, no need for exploring different textures. They eat to obtain fuel, we eat for energy yes but also for pleasure and as a social pass time so quite different really.

I had to take a phone call in while writing this post so probably lots of cross posting.

DH has gone now for ages, but we have set up the webcam and it is quite a good stream so DS1 can still have his daddy read him a bedtime story.

Oh yeah I'm familiar with the poo your discribing Spot.

Summer My Eddie says, "Hello", to your Eddie. Eddies are great aren't they? Also, re spitting out food, Eddie does this if the food is runny but manages stodgier food OK, eg he eats green mash (mashed potato with cabbage or courgettes) without any mess but baby rice is a nightmare. Not that I'm trying to push you into weaning in any way but I just wanted to share my experience.

Lots more to say but DS is waking up so must get ready to do the shopping. Big Hi to everyone else and hope to be back later.

Morning all.

trace I really hope my post yesterday about our sleep didn't come across as horribly tactless So sorry your HV has been giving hopeless advice, it does osund as if she's got a set stock of things to say and will just offer them whether or not they're relevant to your situation (such as the bottle advice). Certainly sounds as if waiting til the school holidays might be a good plan, especialyl as things like sleep training are meant to work better the older they get. Don't you dare feel bad for posting me posts, we've all done them and the basket is stronger for it [little hug]

veggie your poor dh hope he finds some suitable pantage. And how cute about the ds's hairdos! DD still pretty bald, her hair is starting to grow back in but it's so far she looks as if there's very little there and people still think she's a boy What a lovely idea about the bedtime stories

Indith can't help there on the spa front, just v. DH gave me a voucher for a massage for Mothers' Day and I still haven't had a chance to have it

daisy glad to hear the fresh air has helped ds's botty. It must be great as a baby to be allowed to just frolic in the nud, if I lay in the back garden with no clothes on I'd probably get arrested but for her it's fine!

WG/SL re weaning, some great advice here. Whatever suits your baby is clearly the best option, as we all know they develop at such different rates that what's good for one shouldn't be assumed to be good for another. We're just making it up as we go along really, not terribly organised it's more a case of What do we have in the house that she might like to try a bit of? So BLW clearly for the super-lazy mother and also it means I don't have to worry if she doesn't eat it, because it's just about playing at the moment. Probably ought to get a bit better organised though, I really admire people who have the energy to make loads of different things and puree them and give their baby proper variety, we're defaulting to melon lots as we know she likes it

arti love don't feel bad about needing your sleep! You're back to work soon and really need to be properly rested as there's no chance to grab a swift 20 mins power nap under the desk. I assume... Re sweet potato, well if she likes it she'll stop when she's had enough, so wouldn't worry too much!

PD sorry to hear about rows, at least you're home now and at a bit of a distance from your mum's not very helpful comments.

HV's, I phoned ours a couple of times in the early days but they usually took about 48 hours to call back. The only bit of HV advice I've got in our red book is "Unsettled sometimes, keep head raised, offer gripewater". I remember this particularly because the next time I spoke to her, we mentioned that grip water had done bugger all and she said "oh yes, you may as well just use warm water, it does exactly the same" We've been to the baby weighing clinic a few times, but other than that no HV contact. And phew, given the sound of some of the conflicting info they seem to give out. Much better to stick to Mumsnet

spot - we had one of those poos yesterday! I wondered what on earth was going on as it was mostly made up of bits of undigested red pepper [mmmmmmm]

Today's issue: nurseries. Have been to a few, the nearest one is lovely and fun but there are 24 kids in the baby room is it just me or is that really quite a lot?! There are enough staff, for sure, but it did seem like a heck of a lot of tinies. I've been phoning round lots of places, having left it a bit last minute (she says, going back to work part time in January...) and there are lots that don't have any places to offer until September 2010. So people are signing up babies that haven't even been conceived yet, let alone born. How barmy is that? Are other people finding problems because our babies are born December? The local nurseries all seem to fill their spots in September when the oldest chidren move to school - so it seems that places are available not on the suitability of an individual child or their age, but just the school term. I know they'll have to deal with that when they come to go to school, but shouldn't nursery care be a bit more flexible?

Hi everyone. Sorry, havent been around due to (in no particular order) LOTS of family business, phonecalls, visits etc. My uncle died 2 weeks ago so there was a whole more of that kind of stuff to do...Both kids getting ill from meeting and getting snotted on by all these rellies. Nursery visits and hanging around and bus journeys. And trying to find tme to talk with DH about career choices...Going into work has been weird too as my mat replacement is still at my desk so it is covered with books on herbs, pilates, and pot plants, which makes me feel a bit displaced.

My sympathy to those with bad sleepers. Here too, especially the night before last, when it was so blumming hot here. I just tell myself, done six months, wont get any worse, should get better slowly from now on in. (Fingers crossed)

We've discussed DH being SAHD. Big decision though, as JJ says, once kids out of nursery, wont be able to get them back in again. Mine is a workplace thing, so I got priority, but having said that, I booked the place at W's 12 weeks scan, and I still had to push them to confirm it. Apparently they have 50 people waiting. Have explained to DH that it is more than just playing with children - there is washing, cleaning, shopping etc to do, and he is not a great multitasker. He agrees but said he can learn. I think he can and I think he would love it, but I'm frightened of all the earning onus being on me, being REALLY REALLY poor again, and turning into a money nazi - ie "What ! You bought them a mini milk each today ?! THAT WAS NOT IN THE BUDGET !". I think it may come with a whole load of new stresses. DH is stressed at work at the mo, but we dont stress about money, and we can both get a sneaky day off by taking a days holiday and staying at home, which will no longer be an option.

WRT to weaning, W interested a lot in yoghurt fruit and veg as purees. Only likes looking at things with his hands and never puts anything in his mouth. So has been offered lots of finger food but generally throws it on the floor as it is quite boring. However, since DS1, I changed what we eat a lot, so almost all our meals are child friendly, so he gets pureed evening mean (chicken casserole with veg/lentil spag bol/grilled lamb and potatoes), so I am not madly pureeing and freezing in small cubes.....I was bought up veggie, so I dont eat much of the meat myself, but oddly I quite like cooking it for the boys, and that way I get to eat something I really like (like a bean salad) for dinner, which they would hate...

Right, trying to get some sleep and then into the garden...

Take care ladies