May 2009 - loved-up new mums and/or sleep-deprived zombies this way please

[pulapula]

Here's a nice new thread for us to share our experiences with our new LOs.

Thanks Belgian. Calin Bleu do a stretchy one too. I think I'll have to go to the sling group at my local children's centre and have a go at the non stretchy one. Those nappies look fab! So you don't need wraps with them? That saves money then. Do I need more nappies? Hmm. Probably not. Don't think the muslins I'm using are as sucessful this time as they were last time. Ds was a lot chunkier. Dd2 is very long and very skinny. They do dry in a jiffy though and I'm going through them very quickly at the moment.

emmabmom, dd1 was like that when dd2 was born. she was very hard work and cried or tantrummed each time i fed or held baby. i tried to be sure i had 'India-Mummy' time when dd2 was asleep which helped a little.

dd2, 21 mos, has been enthusiastic about Harper but i've noticed her tantrums worsening. not sure if it's arrival of sibling or age or both. i'm trying to ignore like belgian has suggested but do find myself losing patience by end of day. it's tough and i feel for you [empathy emoticon].

as for Harper, she's a 'good' baby too and never cries - except when she's hungry. or her nappy is dirty, needs a cuddle, etc .

i do feel more relaxed this time which helps (unless i've got all 3 crying at once) and feel i've almost completely overcome depression that followed dd2's birth. have an appt with counsellor next week to follow up. but the frustration/irritability i feel now, i recognise as normal for new mothers with little sleep, stretched for time, eating rubbish and not the same downward spiral of despair i felt last year. i sincerely hope none of you experience that and if so you get support you need.

Scroll down to the bottom and see the ladies showing off wearing THREE babies

jennster, omg, made me lol. how can she move with 3 attached?

Hi everyone!! Gorgeous day again.

Choc amazing congrats!!- that's the way to do it!!!

Dummies I started using a dummy with DD at day 3 as she was very sucky but it never affected her feeding. I haven't yet with DS as he doesn't seem to need it and is only happy with a boob in his mouth .

Toddlers DD (also 18 months) has been ok but is also doing lots of screaming/ high pitched shouts. She has coped pretty well with all the extra people in the house really but I am finding she needs mummy time and if she gets frustrated she lashes out at R.

We got 3 hens yesterday. Not sure of the breeds I'll ask DH and let you know. I'm thrilled to announce we had our first egg today so we are very excited and dh will have it for breakfast tomorrow.I'll put up some pics on fb at some stage.We have a grey one is called Clarabel, white one called Poppy and a black one who is yet to be named.

I have to brag. Rueben was 3.1 kgs born at day 5- 3.2kg, Day 11- 3.6kg and day 15 3.95kg . He's a growing concern!!!!

Hi All,

Just checking into the 'other side' for the first time! it was beginning to feel pretty lonely on the antenatal thread!

Haven't caught up with all posts but good to see the gist of stuff is what i can relate to - sleep deprivation, constant feeding etc.

Thanks for all your kind wishes and comments on the pics of Josh.

Emmab -i hope things are a wee bit better for you with DD1 - it must be hard with her being so young as well. Our DS1 is being lovely but it is still hard work and tiring and especially for you as she isn't going anywhere like nursery at the mo to give you a break. Keep reminding yourself that things will settle down, and its okay to be cheesed off with her at times. Perhaps DH could take her out to let off some steam to give you a break in the afternoons sometime? Hang in there.

I had been considering a dummy for DS2 also although never had one for DS1, there seems to be a 'witching hour' or hours from about 9pm-1am where he is really fractious no matter what you do, and i thought a dummy might help, but DH is not keen. We will give it a few more days i think to see how things pan out.

Febes Isn't it compulsory to have a hen called Henrietta?

Grrr Waiting in for HV. I can't hear the door in the garden so have to stay inside.

Rosie - omg I SO know what you mean re: the 'witching hour' - am THIS close to using dummies... I have 2 as a 'just in case' - M is sooooo sucky, when she gets all cross and hot and bothered she's sucking her hands like there's no tomorrow. Its making me doubt my milk supply (although she's sucking well, and I can hear it gurgling away, and she's having plenty of pooey and wet nappies) Dp wants me to start introducing formula but I don't know if she really needs it. Sigh. Actually, TBH, am beginning to feel very rubbish and like a crap mummy and am crying an awful lot I KNOW that this is all normal and everything, but GOD I'm sooooooo tiiiired. Dp is back at work already (he only had a few days off) and I just feel like a knackered old milk machine, sitting amongst a pile of soggy tissues on the sofa. When do they start sleeping a bit longer at night? M is only 12 days old, and the longest she is going at night is about 2 hours.

Sheesh. Sorry about the me, me, me post. Just feel a bit shit, that's all. Anyone else in the same boat? This is all normal, isn't it - constant feeding, constant wanting a cuddle (don't mind that bit as much) crying then wailing (baby, not me. Actually, me as well), feeling like a zombie.... yada yada.....

Also - naff, daft question... when would be a good idea to start expressing so M can have a bottle? My mw suggested not till she was a couple of weeks old because of my prolactin production blah blah blah.

Only positive note is that I can get into my pre-pregnancy jeans already (although need to use one of those button extender things) - still got a jelly belly though...

sausagenmash - i don't think there's anything wrong with dummies - babies only have control over their mouths at this age and find sucking very soothing. Nothing wrong with giving one a go. I can't cope with DS2s screams so at least it gives a bit of respite (til it falls out lol).

I has a similar experience with my first DC (sooo tired and crying a lot), and i don't think there's anything wrong with trying the odd formula feed either, as constant BF is so exhausting- then DP can give a feed. She had formula every night at 11pm for her early months, and all her milk was formula from 8-12 months.

Do you mean 2 hours between feeds (start of one to start of next) or 2 hours sleep? Sam still only does 2 or 2.5 hours sleep max at night at 3 weeks old. I find co-sleeping is best for me, as otherwise i'd spend a lot of time trying to get him back in his basket and therefore get less sleep. The longest sleep he's done is 3 hours and that was yesterday evening.

sausagenmash- i know its very hot, but have you tried swaddling, for calming M and seeing if she will sleep longer. We swaddle S (arms only) in a moses basket sheet sometimes.

I think I may be bathing baby J too often again then...I'm doing him every other day, and I was begining to think that he wasn't "clean" and wanted to start doing him everyday like I did with DD he's got little milk spots all over his face though, and I like it when he smells all clean...I think I'm just a clean freak. I personlly don't feel clean unless I have a bath or shower everyday. I've only just stopped bathing DD everyday, and she's 3 1/2, and that's only cause I seem to be running out of time by the time we've all had dinner. X

I don't know whether this will work, as I've never posted a link before in my life, but hopefully if it does work, this should be a pic of me, DP, my DD and the only pic of baby J, I have on facebook so far.wedding pic

Thank you for all of the words of support. I am sure these feelings will pass. I finally got baby S asleep on her own right as DD1 woke from her nap, so no nap for me! But I took DD outside with a huge bucket of water and some paint brushes and we 'painted' the sidewalk...she had a blast and you know what, so did I. I always try to give her lots of one on one time, but I have noticed today that she seems a lot better since we have laughed so much today. Screaming seems to be lower on her agenda as well, which is nice for everyone...

saus I totally know how you feel and yes I think it is normal...although I am not sure. I don't really remember feeling this crappy after DD1. I too hope it will pass and I am sure it will. We can hold hands and tissues together

Jael I am the same with the clean thing. I also bath everyday (sometimes twice ) and DH always makes fun of me...but he bathes too lol DD1 has a bath every night. One night I didn't for some unknown reason so I gave her nutella on toast (which I never ever do either) for breakfast and she was so messy I threw her in the bath! DH said I did it on purpose...maybe I did. I would wash baby S everyday as I also am addicted to the clean baby smell, but am holding off at the moment cause of her dry skin.

Something seems to be up with baby S today. I think it is some terrible wind but she never ever cries and today she has been turning bright red and doing little screams. It is aweful as I get her to sleep on me and then she wakes with a scream. I keep feeding her as she is sucking like a fiend but then she was sick all over (which she never is either) so I think she ate to much...just really weird to happen all of a sudden like this.

Wow another large post lol Just goes to show that the attention given to DD1 has done her good since she has allowed me to write all this

Sausage - yep - feeling all that stuff too - only I am lucky as DH is still off and very helpful - but still - exhausted and crying for not very much reason too here.

I can't face expressing on top of all the feeds i am doing - and have been trying an 11pm bottle formula feed by DH also - but thought it was making him fractious as he guzzles it really quickly compared to the Breast feed and then pukes it up as it hits his stomach too quickly - even though using slowest flow teat, and then cries as he isnt getting the cosy comforting feed at the boob, after crying a while he then ends up getting another feed from me - which is why we thought either dummy as comforter after formula feed or midwife suggested leaving the bottle feed for a couple of weeks to let my milk flow settle down. but last night we tried again after i burst into tears shouting 'take him away take him away' after he nipped my already sore nips again - thanks to constant cluster feeding most of yesterday. I just wanted him to get a bottle from the start also as DS1 breast fed great but would not take a bottle at all and this was really stressful when i went back to work and he went to nursery.

sorry - turned into a me me post!

Oh and DS2 has only had one bath so far in hospital and he is a week old tomorrow! topping and tailing so far.

LOL at the lady with three babies strapped to her. Must take her the whole day to get those slings sorted. Must admit the lady at the top of the page looks v stylish wearing hers - am tempted and never thought I would be. They look a bit of a faff - can anyone put pay to this and persuade me??

PROUD MUMMY ALERT. Rufus is smiling!! Makes my heart melt.

ooh ladyhelen- smiling- how lovely! how old is rufus? can't wait til sam does. he is getting more chatty, by which he will look and listen to me as i chat to him without any crying lol.

sausagen You must have plenty of milk if M has plenty of dirty nappies etc... Cluster feeding is normal in the beginning. It does pass quite soon, but is exhausting while it lasts. Once M has been weighed, you might feel even more reassured.

rosielady how about expressing from one side while your lo feeds from the other side. That way you don't need to do it on top of the other feeds.

ladyhelen Smiling, how exciting. Can't wait for C to give me a real smile. I'm getting lots of windy ones though, lol.

slings I wish they had instructions with those pics on how to do some of those ties. I would love to know some of them. at the triplets, but even carrying twins seems pretty impressive. I bet it must kill your back. The wrap slings look more complicated than they are. Using the wrap takes me about as long as it used to take me to get ds and dd1 in the babybjorn.

emmab C is the same with crying out all of a sudden. I've learnt to just ignore it and give the pram or her if I'm holding her a quick rock and she usually goes back to sleep. Funnily enough she only does that during daytime sleeps. At night she's quiet, so quiet that last night when she slept for 5 h I even prodded her to check if she's still alive!

Went to baby clinic today. There's a new 'fast track' system that seems to be working much slower than the old system that was in place with the other 2 dcs. C has gained a pound in a week! I'm sufficiently reassured now that the bf is going well to now leave the weighing a bit longer.

C is also more chatty now. Actually she's loved watching people talk since birth, but now she's really studying my face when I talk to her. She also makes cute soft aaah noises when awake and happy.

Belgian- 5 hours sleep! Well done C. S made it from 7.30pm to 10.15pm in his basket and was silent throughout. In the day, he does the crying thing, but its usually followed by a big poo or bottom wind so think it must bother him. I am usually wearing him in a sling so give him a back rub.

Well i went to the park today and DS2 slept for about 15 mins, then screamed and screamed so i ended up having to leave in a hurry. Movement of the pushchair did not stop the screaming . So I had to get my sling out which did the trick. I am thinking he doesn't like lying flat in the Phil&Teds (sometimes he does bring up wind when we lift him out), so might put him in the travel system instead (even though newborns should lie flat and all that).

pula I'm hoping the 5h sleep thing wasn't a one off. The night before she fed every 2h, but she was in bed with me. I'm surprised at how well she settled in the crib, because she's not like that during the day with her pram. Maybe she prefers the crib, it's slightly bigger with a thicker mattress. Who knows. If only babies could talk.

My strong letdown is still bothering C. I can hear her gulp and she's always choking at the start of a feed. You can hear her swallowing lots of air because she seems to struggle to co-ordinate the breathing and swallowing due to the speed of the letdown. I'm surprised she's not more windy than she is really.

belgian sooo jealous of your 5 hours!!

Have just posted pic of my smiling boy on profile page. He is 4 weeks and 5 days. What is so lovely is that DS1 actually first noticed the smiles about 3 days ago.

Belgian- did you say the other day you are thinking of selling your ring sling. After an explosive nappy in the sling today I realised i probably need 2 slings so i can cope if one is in the wash! I might be interested.

sausage, i do know how you're feeling. today was a tough one (and that was with my MIL here) as Harper wouldn't settle down all day. i thought it might be the heat . i got fed up with not being able to put her down, trying to do everything one-handed and not knowing what she wanted after trying everything. so put her down in a room and let her cry for a bit until i felt less angry at her crying. yes, i felt angry even though deep down I knew it was stupid to get angry at a 4week old. she was either hot or in some kind of pain that even cuddling couldn't solve.

It was made worse when MIL left and the two overtired toddlers then kicked off with unexplained crying until i just shut it all out of my head and silently put them to bed as they wailed over i-don't-know.

I'm trying to remember that Harper is a newborn and still needs to get used to being in the world, separate from mummy where she was warm and didn't have to worry about her needs. this will pass.

now, if i can only remember the above if she wakes in the middle of the night unsettled...