Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Post-natal clubs

Join our Postnatal Clubs forum to find parenting advice for newborns.

April 2009 - Chapter 1: We're not pregnant, just fat!

1003 replies

PuzzleRocks · 16/05/2009 18:04

We made it!

The fab April ladies and their blessed progeny...

12 Feb: Skiingone: MARIANNA 4lb 4oz
20 Feb: Glaskham: RUBY MARIE 4lb 3oz
04 Mar: Barbarella: ESTELLA, ROSANNA, OTIS
05 Mar: Kazkiss: ISABELLE FLORENCE 4lb 6oz & OLIVER THOMAS 3lb 7oz
15 Mar: Babypringle: OSCAR WILLIAM 7lb 2oz
28 Mar: Claireykitten: VIOLET ROSE 7lb 9oz
29 Mar: WhatFreshHell: FELIX DEVLIN ALEXANDER 10lb 5.5oz
31 Mar: Mumblemum: ORSON XERXES
02 Apr: Oddeyes: ELEANOR 9lb 8oz
03 Apr: Bleuravin: MEGAN LILLIAN CONSTANCE
03 Apr: Bumpalump: JACOB 8lb
04 Apr: BabyBolat: KARAHAN 6lb 5oz
05 Apr: Mrsfossil: ISLA LILIAN 7lb 10oz
06 Apr: BoffinMum: FELIX DAVID GORDON 7lb 9oz
11 Apr: SpringySunshine: GEORGE NATHAN 8lb 15oz
11 Apr: RachelinScotland: CLEMENT JAMES 8lb 14oz
11 Apr: Lou031205: ISLA SOPHIA 7lb 9oz
11 Apr: Electra: ISABELLA CAROLINE 6lb 3oz
11 Apr: AuldAlliance: ALEXANDRE 7lb 6oz
12 Apr: Phdlife: Name TBA GIRL 9lb 3oz
12 Apr: BethDivine: Name TBA GIRL 9lb 9oz
13 Apr: MathsMummy27: AMELIA CHARLOTTE
14 Apr: Purlease: ADAM 9lb 2oz
15 Apr: Juwesm: HUGO GEORGE 9lb 2oz
15 Apr: Bronze: ISAAC JOHN
15 Apr: HeidiT: HEIDI
15 Apr: Kalikaroo: Name TBA BOY 8lb
15 Apr: Minush: ZAFIRAH ROSA 7lb 12oz
15 Apr: FatandFedup: EMILIA ROSE 7lb 6oz
16 Apr: PuzzleRocks: HOLLY ELIZABETH 8lb
16 Apr: Brettgirl: HANNAH GRACE 6lb 15oz
16 Apr: ReallyTired: Name TBA GIRL
18 Apr: Staryeyed: Name TBA BOY 7lb 11oz
20 Apr: LuLuBai: SEBASTIAN 9lb
20 Apr: Swaliswan: BETH 7lb 9oz
21 Apr: Kittycatisgettingfat: GABRIELLA AUDREY BIANCA
21 Apr: B52s: SAM MARTIN 7lb 9oz
21 Apr: Schulte: HAZEL LOIS 7lb 9 oz
23 Apr: Tristaleejac: LEWIN 8lb 4oz
23 Apr: NuttyTaff: TIAHNA SKYE 8lb 8oz
23 Apr: Purplemonkeydishwasher: ISLA ELIZABETH 8lb 14oz
24 Apr: Soon2befamilyof4: TALIA 7lb 6oz
26 Apr: Carameli: THEO LAURENCE 7lb 6oz
26 Apr: Surprisenumber3: EVIE ANNE 8lb 2oz
26 Apr: Bicnod: OSCAR MATTHEW 8lb 1oz
27 Apr: Lauren61: OLIVER STEPHEN 7lb 7oz
27 Apr: Gingersarah: VERONICA ROISIN 9lb 1oz
30 Apr: MegBusset: ARCHIE 8lb 15oz
01 May: Satheresitting: Name TBA BOY
03 May: Conkertree: Name TBA BOY 8lbs 8oz
06 May: Frekkles: HARRIS MERLIN 8lb 5.5oz
07 May: TarteTatin: ALBERT JOHN
10 May: Ilovesummer: Name TBA BOY

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
NuttyTaff · 25/05/2009 18:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

brettgirl2 · 25/05/2009 18:20

I think that you're right about the little steps thing - although it is true to say that nothing you used to do is impossible your life can't be as full on now as it was then.

Don't you dare accuse yourself of whining, you've had SPD and it still is affecting your mobility. There is nothing in the world more depressing than not being able to walk/being in pain. Have you been to see a doctor about this since the birth because maybe there are other painkillers that you can now take that you couldn't before. Also remember when you are back at work you won't also be caring for lo at the same time?

Is there a chance that you could get DH to do night feeds say once a week - can you express some milk so that you get a decent night or if not give formula? It isn't about you being a lightweight you are just knackered.

Also can you start planning to do one thing that you choose a week and get DH/GPs to look after baby? Maybe even having some time alone to read/listen to music will give you the chance to recharge a bit.

FWIW I think you're being really hard on yourself. My experience is people kept telling me I would change after having a baby and I really haven't. I still need to do the things I enjoyed beforehand otherwise I would go mad. But obviously life has to slowly adjust back to normal.

tristalewjac · 25/05/2009 18:35

"the main thing is to think as little as possible and certainly not about managing the future"

you're right ginger, as soon as you start thinking about future, you'll just feel overwhelmed.
Just focus on here and now. Don't add extra pressure of worrying about things which haven't even happened yet.
You're doing really well, you really are. At these early stages there isn't much time to yourself, and certainly not much for doing anything fun like reading etc, but trust me there will be eventually.

NuttyTaff · 25/05/2009 19:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

WhatFreshHellIsThis · 25/05/2009 20:06

I'm afraid I'm awarding the rest of the lemon drizzle cake to Springy, as I think her need is greatest!

Springy I'm and not quite sure what to say - you know absolutely that this behaviour is completely out of order and a worrying reflection of how he views your relationship. Has he considered going back on the ADs? Because it sounds like he needs to, to be honest, you said before he went on them he was saying really nasty things to you, iirc, and this definitely qualifies as not a nice thing to say. He obviously realises that sex and feeling attractive is a vulnerable thing for you, and is using that, consciously or unconsciously, to 'get' to you, iyswim.

I hope you've already kissed and made up by now, but these are really tough times, when you've just had a baby - you tell DH from me to be kind to you or I'll be round with Orbit to scare him into submission. And believe me, that baby can scream.

Hugs {}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}

WhatFreshHellIsThis · 25/05/2009 20:08

Happy Anniversary bronze! Seven years, wow!

PuzzleRocks · 25/05/2009 20:19

Happy Anniversary Bronze.

Great pic Ju.

Ginger, you are being unbelievably tough on yourself. Little steps! V is 4 weeks old. Just getting washed and dressed is an achievement at this stage. You will be back on form before you know it, I promise. What you are feeling is very normal and in no way suggests you are not coping. {{{hugs}}}

OP posts:
NuttyTaff · 25/05/2009 20:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

frekkles · 25/05/2009 20:42

hello lasses, just checking in! reading quickly so apologies for not picking up on everything but...

Ginger darling, lots of love. Know where you are coming from, such a difficult adjustment. I reccomend you get a sling and charge about in the sunshine for a bit everyday. I feel so much better when I'm out and about with harris in the sling. I'm still me and he's so much calmer and interactive when i'm wearing him.

adding more indignation at springy's husband. I think he sounds very young and like he's having a lot of trouble adjusting to fatherhood and being a husband. Sounds like he really should just be spending the next few years with internet porn and his playstation growing up a bit. But he doesn't have that luxury. He must be in a weird place, bet he's feeling a bit like how ginger describes she is. I second the wondering about whether that was what his counsellor was getting at, that he isn't coping. And coming off and on anti depressants at a stressful time like this in his life is not a good idea. Don't envy you springy, but you're strong and clever and you'll be fine .

lots of love to everyone else, hope you're all ok! I'm good, just had a lovely weekend at a little hippy festival I go to evry year. We wore Harris in the sling all weekend and he was so chilled and happy, and we had a lovely time and I feel renewed and confident and full of optimism for the possibilties of the summer! Harris is doing well too, putting on weight and looking cute. He's been sleeping six hour stretches at night the last 5 days which is nice. The only thing that seems to be bothering him is wind, so I'm trying infacol as it looks really painful. Any top tips for wind ladies?

I'm feeling well, enjoying having a sex life again and getting out and about. My nipples are a bit sore, but I think tis cause I was breastfeeding in public all weekend and therefore not spending so long getting the latch totally right. Hopefully if I'm just very vigilant for the next few days it'll sort it's self out.

Thanks for my awards! I'm amazed to be honest! Me funny? wow ... and I'm touched that at the "smiles in the face of adversity" one. Bless. thank you. means alot, I've been thinking you all think I'm a moany old cow! awwww.......... Harris says to say he's gutted at coming second to hugo in the tardiness award....wah!

ooooooh bed time, the young man is sleeping and me and the other young man are knackered from our weekend away so night night. gonna get some shut eye while we can x night x

Schulte · 25/05/2009 20:58

We must be mad! Took the girls to the National History Museum today, then a pub in South Ken to meet some friends. It was very busy everywhere and very hot and we didn't get home until 8pm. I am absolutely shattered. And it wasn't even that much fun - I think it was mostly to prove to ourselves that we could still do these things with 2 children

Ginger. You'll be absolutely fine and you'll get all those things back that you're missing now. And more. I remember being exactly in that same situation last time round, not being able to focus on anything other than baby stuff. DH would come home from work and start talking about things that had been in the news or happened to him at work and I just couldn't take any of it in. I had insomnia for months, mourning the life I thought I had lost, thinking I'd never ever have fun again, never ever enjoy a holiday again, etc. Not true! Once you get over the initial shock of being a mum, you actually have the best of both worlds. You can get a babysitter (or DH to look after V) and go out and do adult stuff - anything you like. You can take V along to places like restaurants, museums and pubs. And you can have loads of fun doing kids things like soft play, farms, playgrounds, zoos etc. as well. One of the best holidays I ever had was in Center Parcs! Chin up, you'll be fine!

Schulte · 25/05/2009 21:02

Frekkles sounds like things are going swimmingly, glad you got to go to that festival!

gingersarah · 25/05/2009 21:58

Wow Schulte a day like that would be completely beyond me.

Thanks everyone for all the kind words and support, i have spent the past little while counting blessings and that always helps - and there are a lot of them.

DP has just told me that the German for mid life crisis translates as "shut door panic" - they are brilliant at these portmanteau phrases.

Can I just say - SEX? You women have been doing WHAT - putting what where? You are all mental, I refuse to believe that is even possible, let alone people do it for fun (this is pretty much the stance that I took when someone told me about it when I was 8)

frekkles · 26/05/2009 02:19

can i just add to my earlier missive...... aaaaaaaaaaaaaagh. me so sick of waking up in the middle of the night utterly drenched in sweat in wet bed clothes, stinking, with milky boobs and sore nipples and a crying baby who wants to suck them, but won't move their hands away from their face long enough to latch on properly and then is too windy to sleep without being patted on the back for an hour and rocked for another half hour. fuck i hate these night feeds!!!

frekkles · 26/05/2009 02:41

when does the sweating stop? I think the sex wil definately not continue ginger if I don't stop sweating like a sumo every night. yuk

Schulte · 26/05/2009 08:12

LOL Ginger! Yes Torschlusspanik. Funny thing is, I am actually now looking forward to old age. My parents are always travelling and meeting friends and having fun! They can sleep as much as they like and don't have to worry about paying off a mortgage so bring on the grey hair and wrinkles, I say

Such a crappy crappy night here. H fed at midnight, 2am and 5am. She was wide awake from 2-4 and again at 6.30, when DD1 woke her up. I reckon I had about 3 hours sleep all in all. Had a good cry about it while DH was in the shower and both girls were screaming. When oh when will things get better???

Schulte · 26/05/2009 08:19

Actually you know what? There is one thing that always cheers me up. I AM NOT PREGNANT ANYMORE! Woo hoo!

mrsgboring · 26/05/2009 08:25

Frekkles and Schulte, well done on your outings. We took DS to the Natural History Museum on a bank hol weekend a couple of years ago when he was 18 months old. Not a great success - he suddenly got scared of the animals and spent the time screaming and running away from glass cases.

Ginger, I'm sorry my mention of the Bank Holiday set you off. As others have said, this feeling will fade - it feels like forever at the time, but this newborn period doesn't last for ever, and lots of people find it sheer hell. I've met loads of them over the time I've been going to toddler groups etc. They are all very happy and coping with life now.

Has anyone else's baby still got spots? Edmund is the most handsome chap ever, but he's got the most hideous case of baby acne all over his skin. Everything I've read says it should have gone away by now and am fretting (HV etc. not concerned, so I know it's nothing serious, but it's horrible when people keep commenting on the rash and implying I'm taking him out with some kind of infectious disease )

PuzzleRocks · 26/05/2009 08:59

Good morning. I have a spring in my step today.

Frekkles - Just saw your pics on fb, it looks like you had a great weekend. Was that a babasling?

Morning MrsG, no idea, sorry.

OP posts:
purplemonkeydishwasher · 26/05/2009 08:59

trying to catch up:

mrsg - isla is spotty as well

springy - there are no words really for what a wank stain your DH is being. having a baby really changes the dynamic of a relationship and it;ll take some time to get comfortable again. BUT he is very much out of line.

BB - awesome job on the awards! and i'm on there! YAY!!

AULD and PUZZLE - just out of curiosity - after such a fast labour did your find that you couldn't stop shaking after? i couldn't and the midwives said it was normal after having such a quick birth.

tristalewjac · 26/05/2009 09:00

morning everyone

frekkles - I'm impressed with you managing your festival with a new baby. Well done, I'm very jealous
where did you stay though? were you roughing it at a campsite? majorly impressed if you were!

mrsgboring - my tiny one has spots all over his face too. Poor wee man. They don't bother him in the slightest, but people do give funny looks. Again, HV not bothered.
They'll go away in time

Lewin was beaming out smiles at me at 6 this morning. Awwwwwwwwwww. They're so bloody cute, even through all the spots!!!

Have HV today at 11.30ish, so hopefully I'll get something for the sore boobs at last. They're still sore, but thankfully the painkillers have made it bearable to get me through the weekend.

PuzzleRocks · 26/05/2009 09:04

Purple - Yep, shook like mad for a while after. It wasn't a surprise to me as I had seen it with one of my sister's really fast labours. Not nice though.

OP posts:
tristalewjac · 26/05/2009 09:05

I ever did get round to posting my birth story
Too many crappy things happened right after it.
Can I still do it?
Like, officially, in the birth announcements and everything?

Ha ha ahem.... excuse me... I'd like to announce the safe arrival of my baby.....5 weeks ago.....ha ha

AuldAlliance · 26/05/2009 09:07

Hi everyone,

Thanks for the get well wishes, am feeling better today, though p'd off because plumber came yesterday and said he'd be back this morning and fix all the leaky taps and the flush that only works if you jiggle the lid of the cistern. He turned up this morning saying he's on sick leave and his accountant has just told him he can't work. Doh!!! There's a surprise, then.

Though actually, a prominent member of the UMP, Sarkozy's party, is putting forward legislation to allow people on sick leave to work. At their request, of course, no pressure from superiors. . Because of course when you are on sick leave you really want to do a spot of ... work. It's just damn bureaucracy getting in the way.
I LOVE this government!!!

Springy, hope you are managing to keep the lines of communication open. And DO NOT sleep on the sofa. Surely George is a weapon that can be used to get your DH out of the bed if you can't bear to sleep with him? Leaky nappies, posseting, sick...powerful weapons if used well by a Fanjo Warrior.

Ginger, I know exactly where you are coming from. This time around I don't have that "where have I gone, what have I become, is this my life?" feeling, because I know that there is an end to it.
Last time I seriously contemplated chucking out my cookery books (treasured possessions) when we moved house when DS1 was 4 mths old. I remember thinking, "cooking?? proper cooking? fancy desserts? time-consuming recipes? ha! I'll never manage to do that again." And I didn't for a while, but then suddenly DS1 hit an age where I could do things while he had an afternoon nap, or while he played, and lo and behold I cooked nice meals again.
Same with reading. I used to read one book every 2 or 3 days, and then I became a Mum. I don't read nearly as much as before, but I do still read. When it's your first child, it feels as if you are in a tunnel, and have left your personality behind somewhere. One day, you come to the end of the tunnel, and you rediscover yourself. Except that now you are an even richer person, because you are the old you plus the new, "mother" you.

I have done more things with Alex than I did with DS1, in part because I have to get DS1 to school every morning, etc., and so things somehow get done. But everything is a huge battle, every day (witness my weird migraine yesterday and my neighbour knocking on the door at 7pm because they could hear Alex yelling and were worried I wasn't coping ). Often, the only thing that keeps me more or less sane is knowing that it will get better. I have DS1 - 4 yrs old and able to get his own breakfast, get dressed, more or less have a shower on his own - in front of me as living evidence that the frequently hellish baby stage doesn't last. First time around I didn't have that and I really felt I was shut in a trap and my life would never get going again.

It does, honestly. It just takes time. One day you will wake up feeling rested after a normal night's sleep, have a shower and a leisurely breakfast, plan and cook a lovely meal, listen to gorgeous music, have a nice conversation with friends* - and you will have a beautiful child as well.

*(ahem - wouldn't want you to get too excited: your conversation will be interrupted a thousand times unless you banish any kids/ stick a DVD on for them)

gingersarah · 26/05/2009 09:08

Trista - can the HV put a word in for you to see a dr quickly to get a prescription?

MrsG and Purple - V is very spotty. I have read this sometimes starts at 3 weeks and goes on for a few weeks. I will ask the HV about it at baby clinic but everything I have read implies that it is normal, and best to leave it. I hate it though, it makes me sad as though I have failed her in some way even though you are not supposed to do anything about it.

Last night she slept like a darling, I can't believe my luck - just when I needed it to be honest. I slept between 11 and 3 and 4 and 7, so today is a good day.

Thanks for all the words of wisdom you brilliant people.

And yes - I AM NOT PREGNANT ANY MORE! Woo!

PuzzleRocks · 26/05/2009 09:13

Trista - Go for it, some people post their stories after months.

Auld - Brilliant post. Captures exactly how I felt with DD1.

OP posts:
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is not accepting new messages.