The one where they put their best feet forward

[Soph73]

There you go Ellie

If it doesn't go in a few days go see the docs, just incase. Things like returning to work can have a huge impact on maternal mental health, so just get it checked outxxx

Promise I will, thanks.

Hope you all have a lovely weekend - will try to chat again tomorrow and will be all nice and cheerful, just you watch.

Poor Sal!
Have to say we did cc with ds3 when he was just over 1 year old in sheer desperation and it took all of 2 nights! The first night it went on for 45 minutes, the second just 15 minutes and after that he went down like a lamb. And ds3 is the most stubborn human being I have ever met!

How are things this morning Sal?

I tried CC with Mol as getting bit desparate - did it properly etc but does not seem to have changed her pattern any. She woke 4 or 5 times last night for nowt that I could see. I went to her to check as always do before I leave her to have a moan for a few mins as like to check she is not hungry/cold/dirty etc but I think the check is what she wants as she goes back to sleep after that. Then same thing repeated several times a night on a bad night. Don't know what to do anymore. Feel like have tried everything and it changes for a few nights, then creeps back to being as bad as it ever was.

Ooo she has crawled to find me as bored of being ignored. Should go interact I suppose

I don't think CC is working for me because she doesn't really cry IYSWIM - it says to check they are OK before doing it, and the check is what she wants. When I did it she cried for about 15 mins before going back to sleep, (I checked her at 5 mins, then every ten mins) which was fine. But she still wakes. I'm so tired and I don't know how I'll cope going back to work. And DH won't support me - I tried CC as a desperation thing (she doesn't feed at night so nothing else) I researched it and said to DH that this was the only way I was prepared to try it (eg checking OK at 5 and 10 min intervals) he refused to support as thinks should just leave her to cry it out, which I will not do. We had a nasty row and I can honestly say I have never been as angry with anyone as I was with him that night. I feel like I am doing this all alone unless I do what he wants, which I cannot.

Sorry to moan.

Posted on you other thread Sal.

It's cold here. Very- snow hs just formed ice. Brrrrrr.

Morning everybody. Sorry about sob fest last night. I think it was just over tiredness and over sensitivity combined with my normal nuttiness.

Chipmonkey, that's great, isn't it? I had to laugh at you saying he's most stubborn human being ever, hehe. I'll take your word for it, but R must be close second - I'll even go for a possible tie!

Ellie, that's a hard one - I'd like to see advice on that, will watch the other thread again now that all you nice people there [whimp emoticon]. My (obviously rather useless, but not stopping me to blabber on ever) advice, if all fails, is to go to a porn shop. Buy a blow-up doll. Then buy a remote controlled light switch. What you then do, is inflate it (I assume these things are "blow-uppable"?), dress it/her with your clothes, maybe some lippy for added effect (because you're obviously always stunning), and then...
Molly goes to bed, all quiet in the Ellie-household. Q Molly crying, lie back in comfy bed, after the required 5 mins, click remote control light to shine on fake mrs ellie... Molly checks, sees fabulous mom at her post as required, smiles and goes back to sleep.
I think my plan is brilliant.

Should anyone doubt it (why, I'm not quite sure ), post some advice for us!

Peachy, did it snow again at yours or existing snow turning to ice? I loved those pics you posted the other day (especially the gate one, but then, I am odd). Must be so beautiful there now.

I am not even remotely embarrassed to admit I haven't even been out this morning, nor have I opened the blinds. I had the longest lie-in ever, with dh playing with R this morning. He (R, not dh - who is rather annoyingly playing comp games) is having a nap now, so I should probably get dressed.

don't bother, Sal, have a dressing-gown day! Hot chocolate anyone?

Oooh yes, chipmonkey, me me me. I went to Lidl the other day (can't believe I missed the wonders of Lidl for years - why didn't anyone insist I go ages ago???) and bought some rather lovely liquor filled chocs (you know, those little bottle thingies) for 89p each (per bag I mean). They're lovely and we can share that too!

sorry guys- you can have stubborn baby awards (though reckon bas-only- drinl bm will win an award in a specialist category ) (actually he drank orange juice from a doidy last week- twice. refused yestrday though).
However ds3 gets rhe cup! Stubborn as a mule he si- can take 3 hours to dress him if he wants! He just shuts down his verbal processing and curts you out. Fab fun at 3am

Going to try to make a short film of Bas walking later and put it up.

Oooh yes!!

sal- that is sooo funny!!!!I laughed out loud when I read your suggestion!!blow up doll could work I reckon!!

Peqchy-well done Bas!!! No stopping him now!!

Ellie- also having issues with dh re sleep training/not to. He (dh) is driving me mad!!!!!!!!! So my thoughts are with you!

Hi to the rest

Oh my God porno ellie-mum - I am laughing so hard I might bust somewhere ow ow ow I love it

We are havin a pyjama day here, sooooo tired. DH has taken ds2 out, ds1 is at his dads, just me & mimi here - lush

oof, we, on the other hand, are having serious chat about finances and sitting about surrounded with bank statements etc etc.
I get so annoyed with myself about this sort of thing, we're intelligent people with good jobs and should be able to work this out but appear to develop money-blindness on a regular basis. Anyway..I'm psyching myself up to volunteer not having wedding this year if it doesn't look like we can do it. Haven't paid anything for it so far so wouldn't be a loss and there's no point in going ahead and planning it if it's just going to make things impossibly stretched for us.

Love the porno-mum solution.

Ellie, I've got a suggestion. You think it's the check that she wants - maybe she's gotten into the habit of thinking she can't go to sleep until she's been picked up and put back down by you?
Have you tried gradual withdrawl? So maybe you could try a gradual reduction in the actions you take? work out some set stages

1. Do check as normal
2. Go in, pick up, say time for sleep now, put down.
3. Go in, hug her while she's still in cot, if she's standing, coax down to sitting then lying,say "time for sleep now".
4. Go in, no hug, coax back down to lying "say time for sleep now".
5. Go in, "say time for sleep now", sit beside cot but no touching
6. Go in, "say time for sleep now", sit further away.
7. Go to door, "say time for sleep now", sit outside door.
8. Use speaker function on monitor and "say time for sleep now"

We did something like this and got to stage 3 when he just stopped waking up in the first place.

Ellie. I suspect Ladybee's suggestion might be more likely to work though!

Ladybee, hope you can work something out so you can still have your wedding this year. If not though, I'd do the same - a year's not going to make any difference and there's no point if it creates friction or you can't do it exactly the way you want to. You're going to be together until you're all old and wrinkly anyway, so rather do it when it'll be most special.

I'm rubbish with budgeting as well. As that's actually what I do for a living, you'd think I'd have a proper system, but no - as soon as I walk out the office I'm totally useless.

Thanks ladybee, I will work on that one - I don't pick her up at moment but I do pat etc so will try gradually reducing to reassuring talking and then from a distance. How many nights did you do this over?

I am rubbish at budgetting too and am now reduced to never checking bank account in a sort of la la la la head in sand if I don't know I might not be horribly overdrawn way

Same here, Ellie. I've even started getting daily texts from Lloyds with my bank balance (it was free and I reckoned it would force me to take more notice), but I still find myself with 27 unread text messages every now and again!!! Am beyond hope.

I don't worry my pretty little head about money, I wait till dh tells me I have Gone Too Far. It's genetic, you see, my parents were crap wioth money and his are great!

lol chipmonkey. I might try and copy that line - never one to shy away from diverting blame if a see a gap, myself

I am master of household budgeting seriously i really am, i feel out of control if i dont know everything. I sort it all out and DH gets allowance (in a roundabout way obviously)

I keep a money diary; write down the dates of your outgoings, any for sure money IE CB or tax credits, your wages if you know what they are, etc. Then add and minus

thought i'd bore you lot with our new discovery:
as he's a bit lactose intolerant (well, clearly not majorly - will see below), lately to plain soya milk too, but gets very, very constipated from straight lactose free, we've eventually (well, it works for this last two weeks anyway) found the perfect mix to keep him just about right:

3 scoops Nutramigen
2 scoops SMA soya
2 scoops Hypoallergenic lactose milk

Disclaimer: tins say not to mix, so don't do this - but for us paed has ok'd it for him as we're supposed to keep lactose and soya part of his diet, but in small doses. A couple of weeks ago this much lactose and soya would have given him mild diarrhea, so it's so nice to see he's able to digest it better now. It does however make bottle prep such a lot of faff! Still, a million times better than knowing he's in pain.

Goodness that must cost a fortune! Good that you found a balance though!

Yeah but see Scorpio, then I get so embarrassed about the amount of money that I pointlessly waste carefully spend that I feel like going to work / cutting up all my cash cards (don't do credit card for normal stuff anyway) Seriously though, I know you're right. Still sucks, but right.

It does, it's bloody ridiculous!!! The chemist keeps saying I should get my gp to prescribe it, but after the first batch of sma lactose free, she said we should buy it ourselves - i did briefly ask if it was possible. And I know we do have money to buy it while some people don't at all, so I can't really throw a tantrum about it though. Still breaks my heart every time I have to spend about £30 on milk a week!!!