December 08 Supermums: We are all doing fine and our LOs love us!!

[kayzr]

Hello.

Trace I went with your idea!!

Why am I the only women I know who hates being on maternity leave? I burst into tears when DH left for work this morning (he was on half term last week) and found the walls closing in again. I can't drive anywhere today safely because of sleep deprivation.

168 hrs, 24/7 babycare without a break or any decent sleep is totally doing my head in.

I CAN'T WAIT TO GET BACK TO WORK

(and yes, I realise I am a bad bad BAD mother for feeling this way )

Verso, being at home doesn't suit everyone, you're not a bad mum, far from it [hugs]

No Verso you are normal. Children are hard. Work is hard too but it is a different hard and then weekends/holidays are different. When you stay at home every bloody day is the same and the weekend is even harder as although dh is home the routine goes out of the window.

Shall check out H&M and Gap in Newcastle for vests Effie I adore frugi, love sales shopping there!

Kayz hope ds1 is ok.

Hugs to the pox sufferers!

Stroppy toddlers do my head in. I find constant chatter is the key to ds. What we are doing, what we are going to do etc on repeat. Hellish day yesterday though and I just don't have the energy today. He is currently moaning that he is stuck because he has been pushing his buggy around the house and got it wedged.

Ooops dd crying

oli - i think something to do with not letting baby go into deep deep sleep where they "forget" to breathe - little sounds of you being in same room "reminds" them to breathe and keeps them from the truly deep sleep where SIDS occurs. i read up on this the other day and think this is roughly what they said - sure others can confirm/correct.

Morning,

DS1 is fine. He is currently running round the kitchen asking for cheese!! He slept all night and DS2 woke up once so we managed to catch up on our sleep.

Verso You are not a bad mum at all. I personally can't imagine going back to work but DH's best friend's DP couldn't wait to get back to work and cut her mat leave short. She works at Flamingo Land looking after the lions and she was really missing them. I think if I had my dream job I would want to be back at work too.

Veggie Your children are gorgeous. I love the second picture, they have great smiles.

Oli, WG is right. Your breathing regulates their breathing.

Hope all the chicken pox DCs are feeling ok this morning.

Flamingo Land! I haven't been there in years, I wasn't sure it was still open!

Just a quick "Hello". I have DD1 all week this week as her nanny had an op on Friday. I have never done a whole week with them both on my own so I am a little nervous. So far they are both being angels but I suspect I am being lulled into a false sesnse of security.

Sorry to hear about all the ill toddlers. Veggie and Effie how are the pox progressing? And kayz I am glad your DS1 is on the mend.

Verso - I miss work sometimes. I miss doing something I know I am good at and get appreciation for. Parenting is hard as there is less concrete feedback when you are doing well. And, as others have said, little variation to your day. You are not a bad mum to miss your old life. Sometimes I dream of going back fulltimev although the plan is part-time.

Am I right that there are a couple of Cambridge girls here? Is it JJ and Summer? If so, do either of you know of any good babysitters in the city? We are going to a wedding at Kings in a few weeks and taking DD2. We have a room in dh's old college which is v near to Kings and I want to find someone to sit in the common room from 7-11pm and listen to the monitor and comfort DD2 and call me if DD2 wakes. If she does I will come and feed her. Any ideas?

Morning!

Verso - I'm worried about you. I know I always say this - and I know you're far from stupid and have had previous PND - but it sounds to me like you have some symptoms. Any chance you could see your GP - even if it's just to shut me up! You are NOT A BAD MUMMY at all. We're all different. I'm even a different mummy this time than with dd1. Is there any way you could go back to work earlier than planned - or out a few hours in here and there, just so you feel like you have your own identity again a little? I really am quite concerned about you and wish I could come over and help you out with your LOs.

Kayz - so glad F is feeling better. I agree with Veggie - Metanium is like magic and you only need a teeny weeny bit so a tube lasts ages!

Sorry about all the pox going round. DD1 has never had it despite me virtually forcing her to lick other children's spots...I would like it over and done with!

Veggie - you boys are very handsome indeed and I can imagine that they will be breaking some hearts when they are older - I'm sure no girl will ever be good enough for them!

dd2 awake from her nap...back later xxx

Oli I think the movement and breathing helps circulate air and regulate them, or something like that. Aparently they have found being close to mum regulates their breathing and heart rate.

Verso my love you have enough going on in your life without adding guilt, seriously don't waste any energy on it.

Both ds' had unsettled nights but particularly ds1 he was sweating like a little piggy and this morning did a nasty poo. He looks so funny with all his spots. They are still appearing. So far our solitary confinement isn't too bad, I think it will be good for ds2, but get back to me on Friday. The few friends I have here have babies so don't want to risk infection unfortunately. So I will be on here often demanding attention.

Thanks Kayz it is quite easy to get ds2 to smile, just have to look at him, makes him very popular with old ladies.

trace I "heard" myself when I read back my last post and have just been to GP. I have PND... there's a surprise. Thought I would be ok this time because of the better birth...

anyway have some tablets and a follow-up appt next Friday. Thanks for worrying about me...

Verso Sorry you have PND again. I hope it doesn't last for too long. I like Trace's idea, is there any chance of of you going back even for just 1 day a week?

Rosmerta It is still open, it is very very expensive though. We're hoping to go this summer as DS1 will love all the animals.

Thanks Trace they are quite gorgeous, I do worry I'm going to be one of those annoying MILs that doesn't think any women (or man, you never know) will be good enough for my boys.

I just put the roomba into ds1s room and it completely filled up before it could finish the room. It has been a while since I vacuumed his room. It is rare that I can see the floor and it always the last room to get tidied. The next job will be our room it is going to bed done in sections I think. OMG I can't believe I'm so obsessed with cleaning this house. Sad sad sad.

Glad your being sorted now verso but as Kayz says would going back a day or so a week help.

Oh dear I never thought I would say this but I'm getting sick of the word mummy! Poor ds1 it's not his fault he is just feeling sick and bored at the same time. Think it might be time for lightening McQueen soon.

Hi, I hope you all had a good weekend? DD is getting better at having a good nap in the mornings and as a result is such a lovely happy thing in the afternoons and we?ve so enjoyed playing with her this weekend. its been lovely.

Kayz/Ros I love Flamingo Land too, although I think I was a teenager last time I went , I loved the pirate ship that you can see all the animals from.

Verso you did a great thing seeing the GP, I really hope the tablets work quickly.

Veggie your DS?s are so cute together, and I love DS2?s all hair. And I?m on a bit of a cleaning kick at the moment too ? I spent more than an hour doing the bathroom yesterday (normally get bored after 5 minutes!) and I?m about to head upstairs now with the hoover, I?m quite excited ? oh dear, what am I becoming?

I think chicken pox must be doing the rounds at the moment ? 3 times since DD was born I?ve had phone calls from people saying their DC has come out in spots and to watch out ? so far nothing on DD so I?m hoping she has super immunity.

The long sleeved vests I got were ladybird ones from Woolies ? they wash better than all the others and are lovely and soft for DD to wear. So I didn?t get them in all sizes now I can?t get any more.

Hello all, just popping by quickly, arti I can't recommend any babysitters yet alas but what might be worth a try is emailing the jcr/mcr to advertise for a student who might be able to cover - if it's sleepy baby watching rather than daytime activity would you trust someone who's got younger siblings?

hello all, just posting as I it had dropped off as i've not been on for a while. All okay at daisy HQ at mo...hope everyone okay will try and catch up and post properly later.

verso - am pleased that you went and am so sorry you have pnd. It's good that it's been recognised though and I'm sure the tablets will help you soon. I know I am not you but I just wanted to say try not to think about your last pnd or to compare - I know for me I had such dread of going back to that horrendously dark and scary place, that it was making my mood worse, just with the fear of how things might go. I had to really tell myself this is a different child, a different experience, a different time and season in my life...and swallow my tablets...and am feeling well at present. How do you think your DH will react? I was scared to tell mine for fear of him seeing this as a repeat of last time, but it really is best to share these things. You have been so brave in taking steps to getting yourself sorted. big hugs to you. Do you still have your night nanny some times?

Am going to take P to 'weigh, stay and play' now. The HV told me about it - you weigh them yourself but there is sometimes a HV hanging around if you want to chat. The HV said no one really stays and plays though!

Also need to drop dd1's PE kit off at school - forgot it this morning - and take her library books back, which are well overdue
Having a baby-brain day!

Trace have you ever thought of setting up an online PND support website. You would be brilliant. Also did you know there is some course you can do where after it GPs can call on you to support new mums who either have or are at risk of PND. I think you have to be either a social worker or nurse to do the course, but I'm right in thinking your a nurse aren't I?

Hello everyone. Can't get warm today. I think it's because we have hardly had the heating on because of the better weather.

Verso, sorry to hear you have PND again but good on you for going to the doc. Maybe it won't be so severe this time round, with you catching it early.

I miss some aspects of work and I am still working a bit anyway, but what I really miss is dear old London Town. I know you all know this and I have said it a bezillion times, but now when I go in, it's always a fearful rush and I can't really relax and enjoy it the way I used to. Anyway, we looked at a house in Charlbury on Saturday, which is the small Cotswolds town 3 miles away where I get the train into London. It's a cute place and I could walk to the station. But it's up for more than I want to pay and I need to work out a way to get it for 10-20% less than asking price (it needs a lot of work). It's daft - I do a lot of negotiating in my job but when it's personal I go to pieces. Arti, what happened about your house?

Glad you are having fun with your DD, ZJ. Me too, she is such a sweet little thing. I get gloomy and frustrated every day about how little I get done nowadays, but I also consider every day that my DD is wonderful and I am glad I did it.

Verso - good on you for going to the gp and getting help. hopefully the tablets will mean the worst has passed.

LadyT - i reckon that in the current market people set their asking prices anticipating offers of 10-20% under. nobody expects asking price. and the fact you have no chain makes you very attractive to sellers. i say go for it.

we have no news about our offer because of the dreaded chain effect. the offer on our house is 15% below asking, so we have said we will accept it only if the place we want accepts our offer of 15% below asking, and we have been told the same about our offer as they try to pass the cut up the chain... it could be days before we all know the answer on our offers and even if everyone says yes the chain is long and in this market could fall apart at any minute.

Hello ladies!!

Sorry I haven't been on in a while. It was so nice to see all of you ladies and your LO's at the North London meet up!

I've been a bit under the weather again. Not sure what it is this time and I don't want to go to the GP if it's nothing but a cold. Stuffy/runny nose, really sore throat and cough. Had a fever again as well on Friday but haven't had one again since. All I know is I'd like to be able to breathe through my nose!!! Hope LO doesn't get it!!

Veggie I swear Jordy has the most awesome hair ever!! He looks like such a rock star!

right... off to try and catch up on all that's been happening with you lovely ladies!

Verso: so glad you went to your GP. You've sounded so angry and upset recently. Hope the tablets help you through this patch (it IS only a patch). Very wise words from Trace as always

arti: fingers crossed on the house(s) all behaving themselves. Was this the house you saw ages ago and loved?

DS1 is a slightly better mood but still bouncing off the walls, luckily DH and I are more or less recovered so better able to cope! We're off to the inlaws at the end of the week, DS1 loves them so looking forward to some peace!

Thanks Kinmberley, he does have quite a hoxton peak.

Poor little muppet he is a bit Jekyll and Hyde at the moment he is either really grumbley or all giggly and smiley. He gives me these cute big mouth smiles as if we have just shared a cheeky private joke. He is also quite a chatter box, I think like his mummy he likes the sound of his own voice.

Hello ladies,

Verso Well done you for taking action and going to see your GP - I hope you start to feel the benefit of the tablets very soon.

Veggie I hope the chickenpox passes quickly without too much itching and sickness. Your boys are very cute indeed .

Very interesting re the reason for the SIDS advice. I didn't know that.

I agree with what Arti said re work. I aometimes feel frustrated and that some time at work would be a welcome break from constant feeding/changing etc! That said I'm meant to be going back after 6 months though which is starting to feel just too soon. I'd like to put it off until 9 months (or even a year) and then go back part time. I'm not sure my employer would be too pleased though - when do you ladies plan to return?

veggie DD is also a little chatterbox. I swear she was trying to say hello the other day! Talking at 10 weeks, she's a genius

Veggie - your boys are indeed sooperdooper cute.

Arti - crumbs, how nervewracking. I do so hope you get what you want.

Jolly - I am going back part time from home in July. How on earth this will operate practically I have no idea, as I also do other work and at the moment I am finding all my time is taken up with baby and house related stuff (and the flat is still messy and a bit dirty ). Oh, and MN of course! If it doesn't work out (time wise and money wise) I haven't got a Plan B, so um...