May 2008 - The Third Thread.... Hot sausage and Mustard continued.....

[Haribosmummy]

New thread... Hoep this one is a bit more accessible!!!

Oh gawd, that's horrific. I googled her, you would recognise her, she's been in so much. For anyone though that's just the worst thing in the world. There was an article in the Saturday Guardian about a woman who lost her toddler to cot death, I had no idea it could happen to older children too. It makes my insides churn thinking about that happening to anybody at any age. So so tragic.

Sarah Parish

indigoblue I too get very going to soft play and other little shits kids being rough etc and upsetting my DD1. It's hard enough taking a baby and a toddler to soft play on your own without having to deal with that.........

Yeah, that's her LM... It's really sad. I know, from DH, just how hard it is to ever really get over such an event.

Anyway, I hope you are all having good weekends. It's quiet here (well, apart from the fact that DS is still up!!!!). He's been in very good form since his top teeth came through.

HM x

Well we have good news in the Mitchell household, the last two nights DS2 has sleep from 7pm till 7:30am with no waking in the night to have milk.

Hope everyone is having a nice weekend.

Yay Mitchell ! All fine here, off out to lunch in a minute. DS cutting top 2 teeth, which will bring us up to 8. He's crawling around and drooling like a madman. Unfortunately yesterday he slipped on his own drool (marble floors) and split his lip . Cried and cried and I nearly did too I have to say. I thought it would really swell up, but he's fine actually and eating ok, so that's a relief. Bit nervous of letting him of the lounge rug today though!
hope everyone is well.

x

hi everyone,

hope you're all having a good weekend.
Just wanted to ask - how do you cope with separation anxiety? From being absolutely happy to be left in her cot to play while I nip out to put laundry in/go to the loo etc, she screams when I'm out of sight. And from being able to put her down in her cot for naps awake and walk out the door immediately, she screams until she's wide awake, even though she's evidently tired.

And, she won't let anyone else except DH near her. Her godmum can't feed her, friends all can't carry her anymore!
And.. even more I'm going back to Singapore (I'm from there) for a few days in 2 weeks time for my best friend's wedding leaving her with DH and my mum. Plus, to make things even more complicated, she's still breastfed and refusing bottles.

Eeks.
Sorry just needed to have a bit of a rant! Hope you all don't mind.

KWT Babies often take bottles from someone other than the breastfeeding mother. So your DD won't starve she will take a bottle, even if your mum and DH need to try different teats. It must be such a worry for you especially going away, how long will you be away for? Sorry no advice about separation anxiety.

Macaco Sorry to hear abour DS, it is the worst feeling in the world. Hope he is ok now.

kwt - ds had a bit of separation anxiety which started when he was about 6 and a half months. He would only really go to me or dh, but anyone else and he would scream. Only thing i can say is that for us it only lasted about 6 weeks, and now he seems ok with other people again at the moment so it could be a temporary thing. He's not been as bad with me leaving him to get something done, but generally I leave him to cry for a few minutes if I need to get something done and i know he can't come to any harm.

Mitchell - good news about the sleeping.

Macaco - hope ds is ok now.

Evening ladies

It made me really to read about Sara Parish's daughter.

We had a nice weekend on a farm in Norfolk with some friends though dd has been feeling unwell and managed to wake up every few hours all 3 nights we were there which meant I hardly got to relax (and everyone we went with now think we've got a sleep problem). Back home now and she has a high temperature and is already in bed. I am a tad pissed off with her doctor - we first went to see her 3 weeks ago and have been back 6 times and she's said dd has nothin more than a cold but she'd has 2 nosebleeds, has a horrid cough and hasn't eaten more than a mouthful for weeks and will only take milk from me (i.e not even ebm).

Kwt if you find any advice let us know! Dd is going through a similar phase though I think it is related to her being ill. We now have a situation where she will only go to sleep on me and wakes every hour or so for a suck of milk and to pull on my hair until she falls asleep again. [crying my eyes out with tiredness]

My big task this week is to get my driving license sorted so I can start taking driving lesons. Getting myself, a photo, the completed form and money to a Post office has proved too hard for several years now. I've even been logged out of the online system for trying to complete the form too many times

Think dp has fallen asleep with dd as there is a horrible snoring coming from the monitor - best go investigate.

Have a good evening everyone.

MM

Just a quickie. Hope you all had a nice weekend. We're off to centerparcs tomorrow and I feel sick I am so tired from having to pack/sort out the house....alomst makes me wonder if it's worth going away.....but of course it is!!!

Be back next weekend, have a good week.

LM xxx

Hi Everyone
Just wanted to say i'm still here. I've not had a good time lately with depression. But things are a bit brighter.
My dd is very contented and happy. She's got 2 teeth now.
I call them tooty pegs, her great grandma said " oh look you got a meg", how many other words are used for babies teeth, i bet there are loads that people refer to?

and luckymummy, yes you are! lol

Hey babylove, good to hear from you-I was wondering where you were. Glad to hear you're feeling brighter. Wishing you lots of sunny days. MM

Monkeysmama Hope you got your drivers licence sorted so you can start having lessons. Sorry to hear about your sleepness nights whilst on holiday

LM Enjoy your holiday, hope you feeling better.

Babylove I have also been thinking about you. How is your DD? I am glad to hear that you are feeling better.

Haribo Are you ok, you have been quiet and Fuzzypeach and Baiyu, Mumofkandj you too? Sorry if I have missed some out.

Hope everyone who reads are also ok.

DS2 is getting weighed tomorrow so looking forward to seeing how much my 'heffalump' weighs? [grins]
He is still rocking backwards and forwards on all fours but not yet properly crawling.

Hey all.

kwt - You have my sympathy... DS suffers from some sort of anxiety - not separation, cos he's quite happy to be with other people when he's happy / alert etc., but the minute he is hungry / tired / needs changing and the only person who will do is me... Not sure about you, but with us, DS and I spend so much time alone, I do everything for him... all feeds, all nappy changes, all baths etc etc., so he's obviously associating me with times he needs / wants something. it's very draining though!!! I am afraid I don't have any advice about the BFing though, especially if you can't express...

Babylove - lovely to hear from you. Sorry you've had a tough couple of weeks. I call DS's teeth tootsies, but sometimes tootsie pegs

MM - Sorry about the sleeping on your break...

LM - Hope you have a lovely break... You lucky mummy!!

Fuzzypeach - How is work now? Any better?

Macaco - Hope your LO's lip is OK. DS fell through his high chair when we were skiing I caught him before he hit the floor (but it was a bit of a mad grab!) but it's sooo scary isn't it? Plus, DH was not happy with me!

Well, all OK here. Dh back at work. Another monotonous weekend. It's beginning to get to me, how much time I spend alone... and (I know this sounds horrid, and I really don't mean it to) we have my DSDs for every weekend in February plus a week of half term... I do love them being around and they are great with DS, but they want (and of course, need) to do their own things... it's just more often than not, DS and I get left alone and I'm just supposed to clean / tidy the house so it's sorted for when they get home...

Dh still won't let me get a 3rd buggy . Says if I get a new one, he'll give one of the other ones away... I've tried to explain that I really appreciate having the old (huge) one for dog walks, because it's old, masive and really stable and lovely and warm for DS (I can chuck in loads of blankets and a water bottle on cold mornings, and can take it over pretty much any terrain, don't need to worry about mud / mess on the wheels, cos it never comes into the house) but also love having the Quinny Zapp because it is so small and compact and when I'm out and about, it's the only thing that can fit in the boot PLUS the dog (mindful of the fact I'm quite happy to put the dog on the back seat but DH wants me to put the dog in the boot cos he thinks it's safer... fair enough,,, but I can't put the dog AND a bigger buggy in there)... Anyway, just feeling crap and teed off...

I mean, I can't imagine he'd be too impressed if I limited him to 2 guitars!! We have flippin' loads of the things!

Sorry, rant over.

HM x

NikNak how did the weekend go?

Your DH OK about missing the stag do now?

HM x

Please come and tell me about how much your LOs sleep!!!!

DS just doesn't need to sleep at all!!!

He's been full of beans since his top teeth came through (which I'm not complaining about) - eating loads, and just the happiest little soul, but he gets up at 4:30 for a bottle, then back to sleep (around 5:30-6am, though will play happily on his own in his cot with some music playing), awake again by 8am... then MAYBE 40 minutes to an hour during the day nap and awake again till at least 8:30... tonight he's still awake (and bouncing like a bloody bouncy thing!) and on Saturday he didn't go to sleep until 10:45!!!!!

He's really happy (not cranky or over tired), is eating well and putting on weight etc., He just doesn't need to sleep!!!

His dad is a very light sleeper, but surely babies need to sleep more than this!???!!!?

Hm I'm super impressed at how you manage on your own. My mum was staying with us much of the time when DD was smaller, so at least I had help with bathtime. Now it's manageable, but before she could sit, it would have been challenging. I guess doing all the things of daily life isn't too bad, but being alone all the time really can get me down.. it's just nice to have someone around to chat to, isn't it.
Hope you manage to get your 3rd buggy sometime

MM hope your DD is getting better. Last night ours was up from 1-2.30, and then up again at 4.45.. we were not a happy mummy and daddy. And hope that the driving licence will get sorted out.
Raspberries continue at mealtime, always amazes me how she seems to throw her whole body into it!

IB are there dedicated baby areas in the soft play? Some places do have them.. makes me feel a lot more at ease.

LM have a lovely holiday!

Macaco how are you doing with bilingualism? We are hoping to do that with ours.. have heard from a friend who's a speech therapist that each parent should pick a language and stick to it so that the child associates the parent with the language, and it becomes fluent. Sorry if I'm saying something you already know!

Mitchell glad you're all sleeping well gives me some hope that things might get better here

Can you all share roughly how much your LOs are eating? It varies so much day to day, and is so unpredictable here. And what do you give them?

kwt DS eats half a small baby bowl of breakfast cereal(heaped desert spoon of powder mixed with formula), lunch either homemade fruit or a small jar of baby food, dinner he has half a 7 month jar or half a small baby bowl of homemade food and a small petit fillous (sp?) afterwards. Not to keen on rusks inbetween. And now because he sleeps through only has 3 x 7ozs/210ml formula.

Haribo I would recommend the books No cry sleep solution and Healthy sleep habits, happy child by Dr Marc Weissbluth.

Does DS fall asleep on his own or not?

The second book explains that babies need sleep and once I started putting Ds2 to sleep 2- 3 hours after waking before he got tired it really helped. I didn't know all this before Ds2 and am pleased to read it.
As you know I don't do controlled crying (Sorry can't listen to a baby cry) and we have managed to get DS2 sleeping on his own in his own room all night with no more than 5 minutes moaning max.

I think understanding that babies need to sleep helps so much. I know it is hard on your own but you need time to yourself when DS is sleeping.

One thing I know from experience is it is easier to sort sleep problems before your baby can pull himself to standing in the cot, before they can call out for you (very hard listening to mama, mama), before they manage to climb out the cot.

Sorry rambling, I don't know the best way to succeed. But would suggest trying afew methods to get naps and night time sleeping sorted. It does make life so much easier. But as you know I had 2 in bed with me until 2 years old before Ds2 so I know it is hard, but maybe if I knew other methods I would have succeeded earlier.

Forgot to say how much DS2 sleeps, (very proud mummy emotion)since friday sleeps from 7pm till 7:30am or 8pm till 8am and either two sleeps of between 1-2 hours each or one sleep of between 2 and 3 hours.
But when he was waking in the night he woke at between 12 and 1am for a bottle and then straight back to bed.

I know I am lucky but believe me I have had my share of night time wakings etc.

Thanks mitchell - I know I have to get something sorted quickly, as I do need the time when DS is asleep to get the housework done, washing sorted, bottles made etc., He's already starting to pull himself up!! I do ty to put him in his cot and leave him, but I'm not good at controlled crying either.

I think the key is to make sure he gets up early and has his nap early too... Too often, I think, he naps later in the afternoon and then has the energy to keep going!!!

Anyway, DH and I are off to a hotel on Friday night . DS and Ddog are coming too, but it's my favourite hotel in the UK and I'm really looking forward to a night out!!! Yeah!!! AND, I think DH has come around a bit to the 3rd buggy!!! I'm not sure whether to just get one before he gets home from work or whether I should give it a couple of days to make sure he's OK with me having 3!!!

Hope everyone else is good!!!

The weather here is lovely today - makes a change after so much RAIN!!!

HM X

Hi all

kwt The bilingualism seems to be going fine so far. I'm British, DH Spanish and we live in Spain. I speak only English to Ds and DH speaks Spanish to him and DH and I speak Spanish to each other. I've heard that's the best way, each speaks their native language, with no mixing. It hasn't been a problem so far, although DH's English is quite good so at least he understands most of what I say to DS. What are your languages?

About food, DS is 10 months, so perhaps this is different to you. We started on purees then did BLW after about 6 weeks or so, maybe longer...can't remember. He eats well, although it's hard to quantify in the same way as purees. He eats whatever we eat and anything that's put in front of him basically.
Today he's had:
a banana and a few cherries
a rice cake smeared with half an avocado, a babybel cheese, a thumb sized lump of chicken and about 4 black olives.
He'll probably have a few cherries and a rice cake or a bit of mango for tea.
On the whole he still has 2x 240mls plus one or 1 and a half 180mls of formula a day too.

HM
I absolutely second Mitchell`s book advice, especially the Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy child. I think that book is the best book I've ever bought (apart from the BLW one, of course). I got the NCSS as well but never even opened it, the healthy sleep habits one was sooo soooo good. It explains the SCIENCE behind how, why, when, how much sleep they need at different ages and tells you how to see the signs of tiredness and get them down before they are over tired. At first I was missing the signs, he'd get over tired and then I really couldn't get him to sleep. Also (and this works) the earlier you put them to bed, the later they'll sleep, NOT the other way round.
They still have funny nights what with teeth etc but since reading that book DS has basically done 7pm to 7 or 8am. We do a wind down routine (bath, bottle, bed) BEFORE he seems tired, so starting around 6.15 and he's usually asleep by 7pm. Also, spotting the tiredness signs for naps helps them not get too over tired during the day. DS Still does a morning nap of about 90 mins (about an hour after waking), often a 40 min midday one and always at least an hour early afternoon.

HTH

x M

Mitchell and Macaco - you are geniuses, or geninii, or whatever the correct word is for the plural of genius!!!

DS is asleep and has been for 30 minutes!!!!

Just followed the routine and put him in his cot at 7:30, wasn't the least bit tired, but I put his light show on and some soothing music and after about 25 minutes... it all went quiet, so I crept upstairs and peeked and he is asleep

I've made an extra bottle for tonight, just in case, but talk about a result!!

Thank you so much!!!

HM x

Haribo Thats great news, well done you!!!!!! I hope it continues

Well I survived the weekend with DH very he wasn't able to go on the stag do. HE wanted me to admit I was wrong to persuade him not to go. But the visitors arrived about midday Sat and left midday Sun, so I would have done half the visit on my own. And I'm knackered at the moment with up and down nights. If it's not one it's the other. DS2 has v blocked nose and wakes really upset but finding it hard to feed, and DS1 is going through a scared faze.

Going to email a friend who's in Abu Dhabi now with name of books, she has a May babe who doesn't sleep more than 3 hrs at a time.

Off to Beat Stress course again later, after having a very stressful week I hope it's another positive session.