December 2006- where they've grown so much we spend more time talking about our lives than our children

[Indith]

Well that and our pregnancies and other non-dec '06 children

Tis a good thing I feel.

I'm glad you're taking control re counselling Jabber and that you've spoken to your mum Lennied.

Aw Castles. The holiday gave you time to ponder. You've had a real run of bad luck.

EV - Give little EV a hug from me. I did lol @ your friends' DS sole concern being missing lunch. Typical man

Solo - My friends dd had to go to a&e last week as she bashed the top of her mouth after falling on a climbing frame. She was so brave and we were seen quickly. My friend took her to the dentist the next day and she was given anti-bs and he said he couldn't guarantee that her second teeth weren't going to be affected. Hope your dd is okay, bless her.

DD1 has been very whiney lately. I think I have to adapt my attitude to her. Have you any tips on what I can do? I'm caught in a vicious cycle and I reckon I need to cut her some slack (somehow).

Good for you, LenniEd, re your DM...can't have been easy for you seeing her with him, and don't think you should give yourself a hard time about waiting till now. Not one bit. Because a) its better to be really sure and clear and have given it/him a chance before saying something and b) its not your job to look out for your DM's relationships and c) its normal to go through a phase of hoping/wishing/denying before accepting that crappy behaviour is that crappy. At least, IME

Aaaah, Margo, if only I did (have tips). I think many LOs of around your and my dd1's ages are going a little nuts now - being the end of the holidays etc. I agree with cutting slack, whilst holding on to whatever boundaries you hold dear

I think dd1 is suffering from boredom, lack of structure, and pre-school nerves all mixed up.

EV, am impressed with the list of clear and practical worries your dd was able to list. I asked mine about big school tonight, and how she felt, and her main concern was being stuck with the one friend she knows 'who isn't always very nice to me, Mummy'. No worries about where the loos are, or getting lost etc - she trusts the teacher she met to show her all that, but she's quite upset that none of her friends are going to the same school. And grabbed my arm and said 'I don't want to go, I want to stay with you forever'...

...I'll remind her of that, when she's 16

Thank you Margo. I couldn't even get through to the dentist today and I won't have the opportunity to phone them tomorrow... I really hope there is no damage to her adult teeth. I've lived with ugly, broken, yellow, crooked teeth all my life and so don't want that for my Dc's

I will try the electic toothbrush with Dd jabber - any particular recommendations?

My Ds is going back to year 6 next week and isn't looking forward to it at all...

I have to start checking out various schools for him for next year. I'm not looking forward to it - dragging Dd around with me... maybe she can ask the questions interesting thought!

Margo, I'm the same with ds1. He's really pushing things at the moment, the slightest thing starts him shouting and yelling, he tries to hit or kick dh or I if we try to deal (badly) with him. We're doing too much shouting back and not enough positive stuff but we just get embroiled in all the negative, pointless battles. Gah, this parenting lark is so much harder than it seems. I think a lot of it is to do with starting school, on the surface he seems quite happy and confident about it but as it draws nearer I think he's becoming more anxious.

Lennied, I had to bite the bullet and tell my dm how we all felt about the way my sd treated her. He wasn't abusive but his behaviour was becoming a real issue. It has improved things immensely although they are still together but she is much better at standing up to him and not being walked over. Hopefully you'll have a good outcome too.

I suspect a couple of dd's friend's mums may ask me to do their dc's cakes on the back of her cake so I may do those and see how it goes.

That's good news about the counselling, Jabber, especially if dh is willing to go through with it. At least it may clarify things for you.

We get the kids crest spinbrushes Ds1 really likes the firetruck.

Thanks jabber. That looks very much like the type I have in my bathroom cabinet...and I have new heads in the drawer! will give that a go tomorrow morning!

Hi everyone,

Castles - not surprising your holiday was as it was, you have had a difficult time recently.

solo - how is DDs tooth? My DD1 has a small chip in her front (baby) tooth today. I didnt even notice her do it so felt very guilty. I must start brushing DD2s teeth a bit more

Jabber - good that work is going well. How do feel about DH agreeing to counselling?

LennieD - family relationships can be difficult. You have done the right thing. It is up to your DM now to listen or ignore your advice.

Margo - thanks for DD1s virtual hug. I see people complaining everywhere about their children. It must be the summer holidays. Lack of routine for the child/break for the parents etc. Sit it out.

There....

Not much happening here. Trying to cram in lots before the holidays finish. Went to legoland yesterday afternoon and it was rammed. Very tiring.

Eli - what a lovely thing for your DD1 to say

Thanks for the sympathy everyone. You always make me feel better

Well done on the counselling Jabber. I hope it works out for you. You really deserve it.

DD1 (also 4 and about to start school) is being a handful and I've just been reflecting on how DS was at that age ... a handful! He was never whiney or tantrumy but he was a pta and now aged 6 he is so manageable and self-contained. Sit it out folks, school really does do them a lot of good. You especially notice it towards the end of year 1.

Good for you re your DM Lennied. Hope it helps. I appear to be estranged from both parents now and my previously closest brother. It's sad (why I've been feeling sad probably) but it has also taken a huge weight off. Some things will just never work out.

DD2 has been really quiet recently. Last night she had a really high temperature and spent most of the night awake. Guess it is the start of those lovely winter bugs ...

Just saw your post about the holiday castles. sorry it didn't go so well. Ex-h was a fisherman and I can well imagine him doing something like that.

How do I feel about counseling? I feel like it is something I should do for the boys' sake and am resigned to that. Not particularly excited or anything though which is probably not a good sign. dh has been on his best behavior. I just SO wish he had done this years ago. I feel rather spent with it all

Castles. Dont mention winter bugs I've been feeling really asthmatic lately and it doesnt normally hit me until October....

Jabber - sounds like a difficult position to be in.

Here's a for everyone...

Ah, the joys of bugs. I don't think there is such a thing as a 'winter' bug anymore. DD2 has had the most awful cold over the past week, and I'm sure that those colds used to be more seasonal than they are now. (If that makes any sense )

Jabber, hope you can make the counselling work for you on whatever level. At least it's a more positive step.

EV, my DD2 was much like yours when she started school. The list of worries was enormous. Her teacher was fantastic, though, and she was quickly looking forward to going every day. I remember the real physical need to go with her into the school to shelter her from the things she feared. She quickly demonstrated that she's much stronger, more resourceful and infinitely wiser than I had assumed. She's been back at school for 2 weeks already and is just loving it - especially as she's paired with a new P1 (that's the same as reception, I think) to look after at breaks and things.

Solo, hope your LOs mouth is feeling better. Did you get to speak to a dentist?

I'm sure there's loads more I've missed. Will catch up properly any day now!

I just can't get a ringing tone from the dentists! it's very frustrating. I'm going to try again tomorrow though. I'm quite worried about her teeth actually as she seems reluctant to bite into hard things...hopefully it's just bruised gums causing that though. I'd really feel guilty if anything terrible happens to her teeth

solo, I don't think you can do much terrible stuff to milk teeth - worse case scenario, they get replaced by adult teeth, or at least thats what friend's dentist said when her dd fell down stairs and knocked a couple of front ones awry. Hope you get through soon.

Winter bugs - ack, already, I know! dd1 has the most disgusting cough, and its not yet September: I am looking forward to term starting, for all the usual reasons and a few extra ones, but am not looking forward to the viruses (and probably nits) bit of it

Thanks Eli. I still can't get through to them, it's ridiculous! I'll end up having to drive down there just to make an appointment! I don't suppose they've closed down for Summer hols...

Has AQ had her babies? She hasn't been on here for at least 2 days

That's exactly what I was wondering Castles, it's not like her to be away for so long!

Shall I email her?

Where's Indith too? Is she married now?

Oooh, how exciting - think Indith's wedding must be this weekend since it seems forever since she said it was a month away. I wonder if AQ has had the babies then - she wasn't far off was she? I seem to recall her saying she was 34 weeks relatively recently.

Solo - hope you managed to get to the dentist, can't believe they didn't answer their phone.

DD has taken to raiding my underwear drawer and then running around wearing my knickers (rather unglamourous big maternity pants). DH finding it very amusing - I'm not so convinced.

She also had a tantrum in an adult shoe shop on Weds after I wouldn't let her try on the racks of sale shoes What am I going to do with her??

No, I'm still here, honest! 35 weeks and counting...Just hurts sitting at the computer now so I get on and off quick. I'll add a few of you to my birth announcement email list and then you'll know when it happens. Think I have indith's mobile too. I thought it was back end of august/early sept but would have to trawl the threads to make sure.

Just got DD2 new shoes. Annoyed actually as I took her in the other day because she kept saying 'Ow' when I put her shoes on. They told me she had room. Took her to another shop today and she is a whole size up!! . But new shoes v cute. A kind of dark purple colour so hoping that the muck wont be too obvious as Autumn comes.

DD1 at Grandmas and DH working tonight so just me and DD2

I can't believe how twitchy we are about AQ I'm just living vicariously through all you PG ladies.

LenniEd, my DD2 likes popping my bra over her head and wandering around. Your DH and mine must be soulmates - he thinks it's terribly amusing.

Have a lovely evening, EV.

DD2 likes to 'wear' anything she can get her hands on. She is currently wearing a top of mine round her neck, a fairy skirt on top of that, a necklace on top of that, a tam-o-shanter on her head and an angelina ballerina apron. She is so cute

I'm glad to hear mine is not the only one with shoe obsession - he religiously gets down ds1's shoe basket and wants to try all of them on. I haven't taken him to a shoe shop since this started, perhaps I hadn't! I do love the dressing up phase though, and he was so excited today as we went to a Fun Day with arts & crafts and he 'made' a necklace & bracelet. He is so loving right now, I'm lapping it up (in the back of mind thinking what will he be like when I can no longer do everything for him/with him as I am now?).

Lennied, scan this coming week, yes?
BP, are you vicariously living through waking up every 1.5hrs, constant indigestion and feet so swollen it's like wearing ugg boots?
Jabber, meant to say about the counselling that I felt the same way when we went, it was dp's idea the 2nd time and I just couldn't see the point. But, miraculously, we came back from the brink, and I know a friend who did it so she could amicably end her relationship rather than end with fighting and hostility. So either way, it may have positive repercussions for you AND you may find it v.therapeutic to be able to say what you've been holding back for a while (by the sound of it)?

Scan Monday AQ - am past halfway now though, which is nice.

Castles, I realise that I now have little to complain about with just knickers!! Sounds very cute, and also very messy! BP - DD also does the bras too - worryingly she now puts them on properly but one cup covers her entire body - her fault that of course .

She's really getting stroppy over what I dress her in now - anything that doesn't meet with her approval is removed. She ends most days just in her nappy since everything else gets abandoned at some point. And no socks or shoes in the house (her rule, I wear mine!) - but as soon as she gets near the door she yells "Shhhhhoooooeeeesss" at me. Am beginning to wonder who wears the trousers round here!