May 2008 - gurgling, laughing and maybe even rolling!

[thefortbuilder]

new thread everyone!

Flick - No, Didn't find Igloo!!

We go to London, because Harry was born in The Portland and I take him back there for his checks etc., I wasn't going to, initially, but I really like the Paed there.

I'm only 30 minutes by train into the centre of London anyway - whereabouts are you?

LOL at Sam in his long sleeved polo shirt and no pants!

Yep the cot mobile (plus music) and baby gym are both brilliant at entertaining DS for up to 20 mins or so when he is hte mood (just enough time for shower, hair dry and teeth brushing!)

GW sam will lie for hours rolling around on his baby gym!

ycbs get you at the portland!!! we are in clapham, abbeville village area so nice and close to the kings road. let me know when you are coming up next and we can meet up!

not much else to report here - all dull although LM i meant to ask with your bedtime routine what time does DD1 have dinner? our routine goes something like this:

6pm dinner for DS1
645 start running bath
700 DS2 in bath while DS1 plays in bathroom with us
715 DS2 being settled and fed while DS1 plays in room
730 DS1 has bath then bed by about 745 - into bed with a bottle of milk and his new ladybird star light!

Evening all

Anyone else addicted to the Olympics? I can't stop watching it and am off to bed soon so I can get up around 3 to watch the swimming finals live! DD seems to like it too.

We are off on holiday on Saturday and I can't wait! I am so excited. I can't remember the last time I got this excited about a holiday. We're going for 2 weeks too - I haven't had a 2 week holiday for years.

Flick & YCBS - If you do meet in London let me know when and where. I'm over in Greenwich but it would be lovely to meet you both and your LOs. YCBS, glad Harry's ok. Taking dd to doctor tomorrow - I wasn't too concerned but when I mentioned her screaming to the HV she was pretty inisitent I should see the dr...? [worried mummy emoticon]

I have been thinking about routines too. Dd has got herself into her own routine and is slowly going to bed earlier and earlier (9pm last night and slept until 630am). We don't get up until 1130 unless we have to though a lot of the things I want to do with her seem to be in the morning so we may start getting up earlier soon.

In terms of doing things - I think we probably all feel a bit guilty or worried about whether we're doing the right things with them sometimes. Dd likes her baby gym and has 2 chairs she likes sitting in to watch me doing whatever I am doing. We read a few books, she plays on her baby gym, we play with her brilliant musical rolling box and we dance every day. On that note, do you think I am crazy for planning to take her baby gym on holiday ?A friend of mine has a 1 year old dd who is totally happy on her own (well, with her own company iykwim) and her mum is sure it is because as a single parent she had to do everything on her own and dd had to spend some time each day sat on her own in a chair.

Not sure I am making much sense and seeing as I am already knackered & have to be up at 3 I must hit the sack.

'Night girls
MM

P.S Any more holiday tips very welcome (what to take, what not to take etc.)

Hi MM!!

Are you up watching the Olympics!!?

I can't sleep, not sure why.... Harry is fast asleep again, but I can't seem to join him.... I totally agree with you about not getting up too early... We usually aim to get out at 9:30 for a dog walk so not back from that until 10:15 and then we think about baths etc., but I'm also finding that all the activities are early so I too might have to try and get up a bit earlier!

I think that, if you want to take the baby gym and you can fit it in easily, then take it.... FWIW, Harry doesn't like being left alone and screams when I have to go and put the bins and recycling out unless I can sort it while he's asleep but I have introduced 30 minutes of TV time (please don't flame me!) as that does tend to keep him occupied and it means I can get bottles made up etc.,

I have a pretty good set up (IMHO!! ) as I have on each floor of the house: Changing facilities, an activity chair or mat (somewhere to safely place Harry) and a laptop so I can pop onto MN / FB or e-mail and keep in touch with the outside world!

I'm up for a meet up in London... LM what about you? Wednesdays or Fridays are good for me (but not this coming Friday as we are off to a party)....

HI All,

I'm feeling a bit better after my weekend of tears . I even ended up in tears at my cousin's BBQ, a combination of DD2 relentlessly crying, lots of noise, a swimming pool in the back garden which DD1 kept wandering out 'to see' so I couldn't relax in case she ended up going out there on her on, and a house full of cats (I am a complete wuss when it comes to animals, v nervous around anything with 4 legs ). It all got a bit much when I was sat on the loo and one of the cats jumped through the (top floor) bathroom window and landed on my lap . I couldn't stop shaking...I know this is completely alien to anyone who has cats/dogs but I can't help it. I then had to load up the car and the boot lid didn't quite open enough and I smacked my head on it.....cue lots of tears in front of all my family, AND my cousin's fiancee's family .I think I'm just over-tired. DH is now off for 2 weeks (I'm not even sure myself how he gets so much time off!). We are going to my brother's tonight for a week.

flick Good luck with the potty training!
I give DD1 her dinner between 4:30-5pm. She has always gone to bed 'early', about 6-6:30pm, but still sleeps til 8am, so I figure while I can get away with it I will, IYSWIM.

gingerwench I think we all feel guilty about not doing enough with them. My first MN post ever was when I discovered MN, DD1 was 4 months old and I wanted to know..."what does everyone actually do all day??!!". I feel really bad if I just 'plonk' DD2 down too much, but I often don't have time (cos of DD1) or energy to do much else. We do have time in the day when all 3 of us sing songs and DD1 shows DD2 her toys, which is lovely.

holidays MM when we went away when DD1 was 4 months we took her babygym. We are going to superbros tonight for a week and I think we will take a few of her little toys (fluffy blocks, rattles) and maybe her babygym if it fits in the car.

I decided to feed DD2 at 10:30pm last night, even tho she's been going well til about 3am from 6pm feed, I figured that if I gave her a 'dream feed' at 10pm-ish, she should then go til 7am, IYSWIM. Hmmmmm, she woke at 5:30am. not bad I know, in fact, very very good, and I'm sure there are a lot of people who would dream of that, but I can't get it out of my head that DD1 was going 7pm-7am at this age.
Yes, I know all babies are different, and I think the only reason I'm getting fraught about it is because they're going to be sharing a room soon, and I don't want DD2 to wake DD1 up.

Right, I'd better go. I'm one of those silly people who like to clean the house and have all the laundry up to date before I go away. I hate coming back to a messy/dirty house. So, I have a busy day ahead of me!!

LM74 I agree I always have to have a spotless house with no piles of ironing lying around. But with 3 kids life is very busy, looking forward to tuesday when DD goes back to school. As much as I love school holidays, it will be easier with only two as at least we can get out the house on our own. Enjoy your holiday at superbro.

MM enjoy your your holiday

YCBS glad that Harry is fine, how is your busy social life doing, enjoy your pampering day this weekend.

Flick how old is DS1? My DS1 was 2 in June and doesn't seem ready at all.

GingerWench nice to see you again

Pina: Hope you have some sucess with your website and your plans are coming along for DD2 christening.

MF; Hope you enjoyed the festival even in the rain

DS2 is now 3 months and getting much easier being able to entertain himself on his playmat or in his new fancy swing that rocks and swings and has a mobile and music. (Ds1 swing just wasn't good enough for him apparenetley)

Enjoy your day everyone, I hope the weather improves so we could be outside- wishful thinking!!!!!!!

Good morning

YCBS - I was indeed up and watching the Olympics. I am now knackered but it was worth it. I am just in awe of what some of those athletes can do and even though I don't like some of the sports particuarly there is an emotion attached to the Games that I love. Anyway, hope you managed to get back to sleep okay and aren't too tired today.

Went to see the doctor first thing and he says Stella's fine - no ear, throat etc infection. He seemed to be able to tell from checking her that she didn't have a urine infection (apparently she would have a fever too) and said she is a happy healthy baby . This however means her screaming is either wind or just "moany" baby (the doctor's words not mine). I now feel a bit more confident about not grabbing her for a cuddle ever time she screams. I'll have to try not to look at her though - she does this little bottom lip quivering thing that snaps my heart in two!

Got MIL and FIL over tomorrow and it is my birthday! I am going out for a few hours during the day so they're looking after dd for me . I am not nervous at leaving her with them - I have a very sociable daughter - but I am a bit worried that they might not feel they can cope. SIL has managed to knock MIL's confidence so much she asks if she is holding dd properly, if she is "allowed" to wind her etc....

I am having a bit of a love-fest with Stella at the moment. She is so lovely and gets more rewarding every day. She has started properly laughing and it is the best thing in the world. When she wakes up and see me she gives me the biggest smile and there is a face I pull that always makes her laugh. We "chat" all day too and her voice is starting to be a lot more expressive. I am going to put a few photos of her on my profile so you can all see how cute she is.

YCBS - meeting in London sounds good. We're away Saturday for 2 weeks but any time after that would be good.

Something a little unusual happened on the way back from the doctors. I bumped into my ex partner. Long story but we've worked in the same office for a year so we have seen each other (we seperated years ago) but when he saw dd he burst into tears and kind of ran off!!?! He then texted me to sya he was sorry but seeing my baby girl made him think about what we should've had. Very odd, especially as he has 2 kids and a wife of his own.

My best friend in the whole world is coming to see us while we're on holiday (she lives in Italy) and I can't wait. I mentioned her on our antenatal thread - she came over the week before dd was born to cook, clean and generally love me but hasn't seen dd yet. We have been through some really difficult and sad times together over the years, particuarly where babies are concerned, and I cannot wait for the moment she holds my baby girl for the first time.

LM - Have a great time at your brother's. I really feel for you about the weekend of tears. The cat jumping in through the window would've freaked me out too! We all have those times sometimes don't we - and it is always when you're feeling low that things like smashing your head on the car boot happen. In the middle of one of dd's long screaming sessions the other day I walked downstairs to have a scream of my own (it helps sometimes) and sliced a newly pedicured toe on the fireplace.

Anyway, best go - I have to translate the directions to the house we're staying in for my friend and then need a nap before watching some more Olympic action!

MM

LM you poor thing - sounds like a nightmare and i too get very emotional when i am over tired - that and extremely short tempered... not sure which dh would prefer!

mitchel - ds1 is 2 - 14th july and has been asking for the toilet for a good month now. and strangely without any trying on our part dry at night for about 3 months - anyway yesterday afternoon in cotton pants and we only had one accident while i was on the phone, and then today we've had about 20 mins of 3 accidents but the bonus is he did a poo on the toilet. a lot of friends that have older ones that ds has advised - try for 2 weeks if you have more goods than accidents keep going, or not leave it for a few months and try again. we did cheat and put him in pull ups while he was in the buggy taking pap to the station as it's a long round trip indluding the supermarket!

MM - that's a bit about your ex....

LM - that cat incident alone would reduce most people to tears. If it had been a bird, I'd be in therapy for years!

MItchell - Totally agree with the ironing thing, I hate ironing piles but I am a slattern at heart and have an ironing woman!

Anyway, the light hearteness aside... I'm feeling a bit novice-like again... been to my PN group and this session was on crying / sleeping... The HV said that babies at 3MO should be able to be put down in their cot/ crib and self settle... Is that true? God, Harry can't... I've settled him twice today for his nap and he's just started whinging again.... Doesn't matter how soundly he appears to be sleeping, as soon as I put him down, he's off again (unless I sleep next to him, as I do at night)

Oh, better go...

am back, one handed...

hrry now asleep on my shoulder. He's tired, but won't fall asleep nywhere but on me and, like i said, doesn#t matter how aleep he appears to be once i put him down and walk way he's awake... i've tried everything... i know he's a bit clingy and that is to b expected but all the other mums just noded knowingly.... please tell me about daytime naps... harry's are really important because it's usually when i try to get the housework done, eat, etc.,

and he's heavy now too...

plus i'm worried witless about DH... he's not at all far from Georgia and Ukraine is in the sae position (wants to be in nato)

sorry for crap typing... this is payback for being up at 3!

YCBS: In the perfect world all Babies should settle themselves, sleep in own cot and not need to be rocked to sleep. Some people are lucky ie. mum with similar name.
But for the other mums who aren't so lucky their darling offspring like to be cuddled to fall asleep. I have left DS2 to settle himself and it has taken 45 minutes of screaming before he did fall asleep only to wake up 20 minutes later. You can preserve and let them cry which is hard but it is one of the only ways to get them to fall asleep on there own which does help in the future as well as now.
Sorry but the 'baby manual' that came with our babies aren't all the same, decide what works for you and then be happy with your decision. Hope you are ok about DH!!!!!!!!!! I will write to you on FB now

YCBS your dh will be fine I am sure although sending lots of positive thoughts. there was a bit thing on sky about just why it's all happening in georgia and it seems to be very direct at that nation rather than just "they want to be in nato" - i think - not that i'm belittling what you said - i thin it could come out wrong.

jacob was exactly the same as it sounds like harry is - wouldn't sleep except on us and we had to wait an extra few minutes from when we thought he was asleep to when we put him down as he did the same thing. sam is a lot more robust and gets put down and yelps himself to self settle! he is ok at it though. remember HVs do talk a load of crap a lot of the time and all babies are different so when they say "o'h at 6 months baby should be doing this" you might think - but harry's been doing that since 4 months iyswim? I'm a big believer in self settling and i think jacob was bad at it because we always did pick him up and let him fall asleep on us, but then that's what he liked and that's what made our lives easier and ultimately for the first 6 months it's about that as much as anything - why put yourself through pain if it's only for what you think you should be doing rather than what works...

this is only a short one as ds2 asleep on my shoulder!

ycbs - imho hv's talk a load of rubbish and they have made so many mums i know feel crap and that there babies arent doing what they are supposed to do! but now all those babies are happy, healthy 2 year olds who sleep well! I never let ds1 self settle by crying and he sleeps fine now, and i also dont plan on ds2 crying himself to sleep, if the housework doesnt get done because ds2 wants to cuddle all evening and sleep on me thats fine, they are only babies once and they do find their own routine and sleep well eventually, some just take longer than others!

that said, i am off to see how long ds2 will stay asleep for when i put him in his cot

Thanks guys...

MF - You have made my day.... I go out on all of my 'socials' (Mitchell - I'm still trying hard! ) but then I come home and still feel like a novice-know-nothing-mummy

It makes me feel really because I feel very needy at times, not a nice emotion, but I feel better than struggling alone... I know my mum did that and I don't want to repeat that!

Also, just have an offer: I'm very very very very unlikely to persuade DH to have another baby, so does anyone want any of the baby stuff Harry is out of? I bought soOOOOOOooooOOOoo much stuff and he doesn't fit into it anymore. It's all been worn (but some stuff only once or twice)... LM YOUr friend has first call on the moses basket if she would like it. I did offer it in For Free, but no callers!!!!

Right off for Harry's jabs.........

hallo all
no time for proper post as have to run off and pick up ds1 but ycbs i just wanted to say that hvs really do talk a lot of crap!! some babies do seem tp be able to 'self settle' but i know of very few.

can i just recommend this fabulous bed?? the brilliant thing is that you can bounce it gently with the baby in it, so if you put him down and he starts to wake up he'll often go back off with a few bounces. i'#m convinced it has made all the difference with ds2.

must fly x x more later i hope

ycbs - another revote for crap hv advice - jacob was so tiny and lost a bit of weight over a couple of weeks and i almost (almost) got convinced to ff rather than continue bfing him...

i also got a call when sam was about 12 eweeks old from our local baby clinic saying "have you been seeing a hv" - when i replied no i don't need to, it's my 2nd child, i'm a lot more confident and my gp is a paed background i got told "but we specialise in birth to 3 you have to see a hv". i hung up on her in a nice-ish kind of way...

flick - Ukraine is so important it already borders Nato (and though it's not reported in the British press, it's doing it's damndest to get involved! ) It's chucked a load of Russian warships out of it's ports which (in DH speak) is like kicking an angry bear in the nuts when you really don't have any need to.

There is no immediate threat, it's just harder to deal with when your DH is out there all the time!

shows how much i know ycbs! what does your Dh do?

YCBS hope you're ok. Your earlier post about feeling a bit lonely made me feel sad. I would love to meet you in London whether or not anyone else can make it. Shall I send you my email?

So tired I have to sleep now-my birthday tomorrow! I will post more on Thursday but I agree with MF's post.

MM

Happy Birthday MM!!! Have a lovely day!

I'm fine (thankyou!) - Got some sleep last night so feeling far more human today!!!

Yes, it would be nice to meet up once you are back from your holidays... I have a 'mumsnet' e-mail: [email protected]

Right, am hoping Harry is going to settle down again so I'm going to join him!

Happy Birthday Monkeysmama

monkeysmama Happy birthday! I hope you have a lovely day. I checked out your new pics of Stella and I can confirm she looks well cute!
What an odd thing to happen with your ex....he must still hold a candle for you?

YCBS please don't feel like a novice. Yes, all babies are different. I know I am very Lucky but honestly, DD1 used to do exactly what Harry is doing, we would rock her to sleep then as soon as we put her down she would wake up screaming. It didn't last forever, but I definitely remember either me or DH having to just walk around the house in cirlces for her to settle. The only reason DD2 self settles more easily is cos she has to, as I have DD1 to look after too. I agree that HV can talk a load of crap and make us mums feel useless.

Sorry, got to go and feed...more later...

Flick - sorry, i completely missed your post... DH works for an investment bank, specialising in Russia and emerging markets.

He's out on the lash networking today, so am expecting a tired and emotional DH to call later on

ycbs - does a week wednesday suit you to meet in london - and anyone else for that matter? I will be selfish and as it seems ycbs is ok to meet down kings road, will suggest it's around that way?

dh is on closing drinks tonight (deal finished today which is great as in this market deals are thin on the ground for some of his chaps) so he will be unable to control himself around drink and will roll in at some stupid hour.

and sam has a cold and a chesty sounding cough so i have had to make docs appointment for 8am...