<< lays out tiny nappies and babygros >> For TYG and SKYTV

[largeginandtonic]

Mornin!

I know Abby.When I saw them at V last year they were so good I cried!If we end up with an extra ticket you can have it..one of the people going is a bit iffy as someone in their family is sick unfortunately, so your luck might be in
What to wear to festy?..hmmm weather looks rubbish..

I dont think its possible to be this tired.L was very wakeful all night, M threw up at about 11.30 and was also wakeful all night poor mite.DH came back from college (and after college he'd met some friends in town so he didnt get in till 12.30 or so)and proceeded to have diorrhea and sickness all night- not very quietly-but oh dear he was not well at all.DH said he was too poorly to drop the kids off with cm this morn (but he has gone to works still so I have dropped them off-both miserable as they are tired, and driven into work and am now sitting at my desk half dead.

Plus the sleep I did manage was disturbed by nightmares induced by the trailer for the film, 'The Strangers'which gave me the total willies when I saw it in the middle of SATC last night.Have you seen it?I cant watch horror films as I am a wuss and just the trailer for this one made me feel horrid.They should give a warning if they are going to put things like that on in the middle of programmes I am likely to watch >>goes off to don Mary Whitehouse pillbox hat and gloves

Have a lovely hol Jam..I think preggers women look lovely in Bikinis.Its when you had the baby a year ago and still look lardy like me that it becomes offensive to other bathers

Happy holidays Jammy. I went to Turkey once. On a plane. It was very hot and somebody tried to barter with my parents to buy me. For two and a half camels. Aah fond memories. Your midwife is obviously desensitised to all things bodily. I'm surprised she wasn't digging out a 'doggy style best practice' leaflet for you.

Hey ho scoot. Lovely to have you back. DH loves the police force. He is the happiest he has been for years. He has arrested people, broken very bad news to relatives, broken up fights, been on a late night plain-clothes vice surveillance operation (prostitute hunting), searched people, confiscated many things, chased known villains for miles and, er, done a shift with the lollipop man to learn patrol duties. He adores it. One injury so far. A woman punched him. And one bit that upset him beyond belief which I can't really detail on here but it involved a little girl of 3. He looks lovely in the gear too but don't tell him that.

So, who's Jimmy Choo then and why does Tilly have his shoes? And who's the Killers when they are at home? I'm a bit out of touch.

AM, do you like those cars you go and watch or is it a dh thing? They have a track here at Snetterton. Never been as I'd rather boil my own head but if you ever venture this far East I'd welcome you with open arms. Was moaning to dh last night that I wanted to come to your exclusive meet up and he said 'just go, leave me on my own, I'll survive' (he's jesting!). I might just do it though if the bank ever, ever gives me my money back. We are completely broke. Absolutely no money at all. Natwest will be receiving a strongly-worded letter.

MKG, can we all ask you questions about American vernacular? Most of my problems come from Friends where I don't understand the cultural references. Like tater tots and whatever it is they put in cheescake, sounds like 'gram cracker'. Surely, you mean digestive biscuits?? And your use of 'already'. Is it semantically-challenged or postmodern-ironic? And saltwater taffy, is that like toffee or is it something different? And is jello, jelly? So does that mean when you say jelly, you mean jam? So do you use the word jam at all? And what do you call men's underwear? Because it's pants here and you think that means trousers. And is your grammar different over there? I hear a lot of 'I don't got it' for example. Is that just a regional quirk or is it acceptable? Would your Mum correct you? What does Patrick Swayze eat to stay alive in Dirty Dancing, something like 'ju ju beans'?? And, finally, do you have gingerbread?

CQL, there's no excuse now, get typing. We want to be regaled with stories of entertaining millions.

Jelly is our Jam I think.Jello is jelly.
And I believe tater tots to be small roast potatoes but am willing to be corrected.
Underwear is intriguing now you mention it.

Welcome home Scoot. Sorry to see that you had a crap nights sleep and that everyone is suffering today.

LOL at your post SOH
Yes i do like the cars, didnt think i would but when you are there in the thick of the action you cant help but get sucked in! I was even a grid girl last weekend (although looked pretty rough and wasnt in a catsuit that looked like i would need medical help to get out of. Nor did i have my make up put on with a trowel!) They do race at Snett, but that was in July, i didnt go to that as it was the weekend before we moved so i sent dh on his own. They are back there Aug 2nd 2009

JAM have a great time x

PJ how was last night?

Hi Scoot - what a shit time I've had whilst you've been away. Clearly, the marital stress, lack of job, but the worst thing is that the delivery date of Season 2 of One Tree Hill keeps moving back. Nice to see you back, baby.

LG&T sends kisses to all.

Last night was fine, dh very supportive. For a change.

"Last month [Patrick Swayze] was eating Jujubes to stay alive, this month women are stuffing diamonds in [his] pockets".

When are you coming to me for Marathon of OC/90210/One Tree Hill watching?DH has demanded I leave the house with the kids for the weekend of the Ryder cup Where the hell he thinks I will go is another matter?However if I do I will demand he takes them to his Mothers for another weekend thus enabling teen telly galore.Everyone come.We can put on our PJ's, drink wine, and play with hair and makeup girlie sleep over stylee.
Think we could all use a little meet up at the moment the way things seem to have been going.

Glad he was OK last night PJ..I should think so too.

No one is suffering more than my poor staff April .They are all trying not to catch my eye in case I tell them off for something as I am NOT in the mood today!

Oh that sounds great. I'll just go and check when Season 4 of 90210 is due to arrive. I'd love to meet you Scoot, I feel we would get on well....

You uncultured bunch.

Don't know what 90210 is but I have seen the OC a couple of times. Skinny people. And a cute Jewish looking chappy.

Scoot when and what is a Ryder cup? I'll come!

Jujubes, aah mystery solved there. They don't look nice.

Thrilled to hear DH is so happy, SOH. He really deserves it, as do you, after everything you went through in the last 18 months or so. Now, I am wondering if some of your wonderful placid nature and intrinsic understanding of children could rub off on me. I have to keep reminding myself that A does not yet have the sense to wind me up on purpose. Well, she does wind me up on purpose, but it's pure attention seeking and not out of any badness. I am trying to give her lots of attention when I can, but she's just going berserk when I try to feed O. I thought she was too young for jealousy, but I underestimated her.

I took A to the Library the other day. She was so excited by all the books that I had to physically restrain her. Unfortunately the vile librarians wouldn't let me bring the pushchair in so I had to just grab some books and go and when I did put A down she made for the stairs to the offices and I was severely admonished by aforementioned jobsworths. Amazon seems even more inviting than before. Boo. I did stumble upon the "Toddler Taming" book in the children's section and it's really good. It's helping me to understand A a bit better and get less wound up.

I have a toy rotation system in place for the most easily bored toddler in the world. I have two baskets of small toys which are alternated and I am keeping the "big" toys like garage, box of Happyland stuff, music desk etc under the stairs and rotating everything. It keeps A interested in the toys and stops the living room looking too much like a playgroup and/ or bomb site. Have also had to remove most of her books because if I have to read about Spot going for a walk or Buster collecting eggs one more time I might throw book (or indeed the toddler!) out the window. That was the purpose of the Library visit, but they don't really have many baby/ toddler books anyway. She really likes books with interesting and clear illustrations so we can talk about what's in the picture; like pointing out the insects in Wibbly Pig's garden, for example. If anyone has any suitable recommendations I'd be grateful!

It some Golf thing in September.USA vs the rest of the universe at glof is it?Apparently its some big deal?

I will find out when he is not at college and can take the kids and free up the house for us

Seth is half jewish SOH .At Christmas they have Chrismukkah to combine the two.I love that. >>Scoot-its not real, its not real

I've never seen the OC or One Tree Hill. Don't even know what One Tree Hill is! However, if newborns are allowed to come, I would love to come to your pyjama party! (Toddler will stay with Daddy )

Oh count me in for the PJ party. I have some lovely PJs.

Scoot - it's arriving on 4th Sept!! Excited. This is the series where Shannon Doherty gets fired.

How I love teen drama, oh, I do.

Lovely to hear from you TYG.

It's just the weirdest thing that I know all your RL names. Seems weird referring to you by your nicknames now.

Im the other way.When I saw TYG in RL I kept referring to myself as Scoot and couldnt stop.
OOH 4th September!!I will order season 3 of the OC too!

New borns are welcome of course.As are other kids really-just not my ones

PJ She has never see the OC There are people who dont know what it is..its true!

Dont beat yourself up about A and the lack of patience.You can only do so much and having a new born is knackering (even for superwomen such as you ).And toddlers can be ruddy annoying..sodding librarians want a kick up the posterior though.Are they not meant to encourage children to read?!

TYG I can't believe your library is like that. How . I loved, loved, loved the library as a kid. I was a real bookworm and I still go a lot now. C was joined up at 6months and so was R. Our library is only a small town one but it has a lovely children's section with nice comfy seats too if you want to stop and have a story. They do toddler and baby story-telling sessions every week but unfortunately only in term time so I have never been. There is quite a lot of choice of children's books and lots of dvds too. The library is always full of kids here, mainly they are a bit older either using the computers or doing homework but it is lovely to see.
I used to love 90210 but don't watch the OC and have never heard of One Tree Hill. Sorry! Am I out of the gang?

You are not as far out of the gang as I am Abby.

I have never heard of One Tree Hill, the OC, The Killers, don't wear PJ's, only have one pushchair and am about 10 million years older than everyone else.

Anyone would think I live on a different continent or something

TYG, sorry your local library is so crap. Ours, presumably in the same borough, is pretty tolerant of crazy toddlers including their buggies. We even have Saturday morning music/toy library sessions although they're currently on hold while they do some building work.

Did you get A's bookstart bag? The one from 8 months up has a couple of lovely chewy board books for her to destroy/eat.

TYG, sorry to hear you are finding A challenging just now, J too is supremely jealous if anyone of the other dc's touch me he comes along and pushes them away.

Personally what has worked for us in the past is:

a) remove ANYTHING that might be tempting for her well out of her reach then you won't have to do the run and chase marathon

b) give her a remote with no batteries and an old mobile phone, she will play with those much more than any toys

c) when you are feeding O give her some food too, something that takes a lot of time to eat, like raisins, or something you know she really likes, cheerios??

d)lots and lots of music, normally the more annoying it is to you the more enjoyable it is for her

d) read that toddler taming book (actually its quite good) and realise there is worse to come

OK tater tots are small frozen hash brown like things that you heat up and eat, generally served in schools. www.recipe4living.com/uploadedImages/Recipes/Recipes/tater%20tots.jpg

Graham Crakers area type of cookie, but they are long and thin and when you crush them they make a great crust to cheesecake, which real cheesecake is made with Philadelphia cream cheese, not ricotta, ricotta has no place in it. justingunter.files.wordpress.com/2008/03/graham-cracker.jpg
What is a digestive biscuit? Sounds like a personal problem

I don?t use phrases like ?come on already? it doesn?t make sense

Taffy is not toffee, it is chewey stuff that you buy in atlantic city. It?s not gum, because it?s a food, but I don?t care because I hate it anyway. cadenlaguna.files.wordpress.com/2007/10/salt-water-taffy.jpg

Jello is the dessert you get in grammar school that wiggles. Our Jelly is Jam, but we also say jam or preserves. It depends on how much real fruit it has, Jelly has non, Jam has more, and preserves has the most.

Men?s underwear is underwear (boxers, briefs, boxerbriefs) Pants are trousers

People that say ?I don?t got it? are stupid and have no clue about grammar (I?m kinda of a stickler for the spoken word. Things are good, we do things well type of person) No my MOM probably wouldn?t correct me, unless it was total slang or something, because I would have learned it from her. Luckily for me, my parents are intelligent and didn?t let us talk like that.

I hate ju-ju beans they are a chewy candy.

We do have it, but no one really likes it, unless it?s a gingerbread man cookie.

MKG - Do you say anyways or anyway?

I say anyway.

The problem with American grammar is that in the past 20 years there has been a divergence from grammar that I learned in school. "Whole language learning" which means, if we promote creativity and reading the grammar will be absorbed, which in your terminology is bollocks.

OK I'm off to work now. I will be taking questions when I return in about 9 hours. Feel free to write them down and I will get back you ASAP.

Hmmm, I never had you down as a Dirty Dancing fan SOH.

Ladies, I feel I must confess, I've been involved in two, er, altercations this week. On Monday, I was out walking with my friend, we had her dd and L in their prams, and both of them had been playing us up all day. Luckily, said friend and I are extremely close, and have been friends since the age of 10, so we just ignore them without fear of recrimination. However, L was screaaaaaaaming in her pram, because the rain cover was down, and she was really starting to get on my last nerve. A lady came over to the pram and said, 'Aaaw, what's wrong', and I said (quite huffily), 'She doesn't like the rain cover'. She said, 'I'm concerned for your child'. I (actually shouted), 'Listen to me you nosy cow, she doesn't like the raincover, I'm her mother and if anyone is going to be concerned about her, I will be, now go away'. Friend was very impressed. She just caught me at the wrong time.

OK, then on Tuesday, I took L for her jabs. There is only one toy in our GP waiting room, and L was playing on the floor whilst I was having a pleasant conversation with a father opposite me. L started to whinge a bit, so I turned around, got the toy off the chair, and put it down in front of her. I could see this grandmother staring at me, and I couldn't work out why, I though maybe she had a funny eye. She stared at me hard for a couple of minutes, then stormed over, snatched the toy off L and gave it to her grandaughter. I said (very nicely), 'Oh, I'm so sorry, was she playing with that, I didn't see her.' She said, 'Of course you saw her, you stupid cow, it was perfectly obvious she was playing with it, you took it off her,' and I said, 'Honestly, I didn't see her, but I think you need to get a grip and calm down'. The guy who was opposite me mouthed, 'unbelievable', to me, and the grandmother actually came over and squared up to me! I swear to god. Thankfully, the Health Visitor came out and called L at this point. I called the grandmother a 'psycho' and she said she couldn't believe I would say things like that in front of L. I said, 'Love, she doesn't understand the word psycho, but when she does, I'll make sure she saves it for people like you'.

And then I walked off.

AM - you are welcome to withdraw my visitation rights. I promise I'm a lover, not a fighter. But I am a scouser.

Bloody freaks.

Wha doe WASP stand for and/or mean?It was used all the time in American Phsycho by Bret Easton Ellis and I had no clue.As in 'she was a WASP'.

Well you can come to my PJ party all of you who dont know the OC/Own PJ's anyway and PJ and I will begin your tutoring in the ways of teen tv.
TMAM-How are you older than everyone else.I thought you were 30 something..

Well done on your use of the British vernacular for Testicles (Testes?) MKG