January 08 shiny new - year babys , tired mums and dads!

[lilyloo]

Will that do

That's the problem I'm having. She knows if she yells we'll run to her aid but sometimes there is nothing wrong but I'm trying to cook or something. I started a topic and most have said i'm cruel.

I do not leave Nathan to scream it out, but it is usually worth waiting a few seconds to see what the matter is and whether he will settle again, for example when he naps in his cot he will sometimes wake up and find no one there, call out for a few seconds and then decides sleep is actually too good . Pretty much as the baby whisperer advocates, trying to listen to what baby is saying. Mind you, Nathan is at least part-Spirited baby, and if not 'caught' on time does dramatic melt-downs involving bright red face like , sweat on nose and back and much effort to calm him.

amani - i really hope she is better soon, poor little thing xx
Lucky - George has 4 bottle of 9 oz a day 7,11,3 and 7, then sleeps through, but i think he will start waking for another feed again soon..so have got the hungry baby milk at the ready. Was reading a couple of weaning books that have scared me a bit, well wanted to wait as loong as possible anyway, but said that the enzymes in the stomach have not fully formed ? and that the kidneys are not mature enough to cope with the waste. Obviously some babies are ready earlier than others, but will definately check it with teh HV before i start.

George was great on the flight to and from edinburgh, not a peep, and loved everything going on at the airport, he reaslly is soooooooo nosey!
Hope everyone is ok and Barristermum, try and stay on your feet , hope the bruises arnt too bad xxx

Hi Lucky- I have found that Ruby has two types of cry (a) my gums hurt, I've shoved my thumb too far into my mouth etc etc (b) I want attention and I want it now!

I always check her when she is crying, to make sure she is not too hot or cold, dry nappy etc, she feeds every 3 hours during the day so I usually know if its dinner time.. she sleeps through the night now, when she goes down at night she smiles and goes to sleep immediately but I think its because I have taught her that I won't pick her up if she is crying for no reason. When she used to cry before going to bed I would go back into the room not speak to her but lift her slightly off her back and then put her back down, or firmly put my hand on her chest so she knew I was there, after that I would leave the room, for the first week this wenton for 15 mins until she realised that I wasn't going to pick her up and play with her, it slowly stopped and now she goes down without a peep. She still has naps throughout the day but I follow the E.A.S.Y routine which is eat, activity, sleep and your time.. it doesn't matter what time you do it as long as it is in this order... sometime after her 8pm feed her activity time consititues of a kick on her mat before bed etc... during the dayshe feeds, then is acive for 1.5hrs roughly and then goes down for an hour usually just in her chair.. she is teething at the moment which has meant she has been more clingly today and that cryiong I don't ignore because I kow she is in pain, but she can be a little pissy madam and has her dad round her little finger so the routine goes to pot at the weekend!!!!!!!

Gingeme- my mom sent me the email this morning, made me smile so I had to share it!

Amani- big hugs hope you are OK and your LO is getting better, must have been very frightening for you xxx

Madmouse- that is fab news about Nathan! I'm worried now, Ruby doesn't roll at all, did you teach Nathan how to do it??

Hope you all have a fab weekend xx

Bluebell - I sat on the floor with aaliyah and showed her if she moved her weight slightly she'd roll. I did it a couple of times for her then did the whole "yey, well done etc" then left her to it and a couple of mins later she did and got "yey, well done etc" again and realised it was a good thing. HOWEVER, now she won't stop doing it and you have to be very careful with her. lol.

I'll try the whole i'm not picking you up thing then and change our routine as normally she wakes up, has a play, some food then sleep (falls asleep while drinking bottle normally)

Thanks for the advice.

Lucky, Cerys sometimes cries out of temper - something may set her off and she gets so cross she very quickly forgets whatever it was that set her off in the 1st place and I find then she even gets cross if I try and comfort her - she arches her back and flails against me as if yelling "You don't understand!!!!!!". Then I just put her down and let her cry for a minute or 2 and then she will let me calm her down when I return to her. It seems like she forgets I was part of the frustration and is just pleased or relieved to see me. And just generally I very much agree with Bluebell on how much they can learn and accept and we followed very similar patterns with her and she takes herself off to sleep no problem.

What a miserable weekend eh?!

BM - Thats exactly what I get, so if I leave her be for a minute then she may calm down. I'll try that. Thanks

Weekends suck, I'm going to see my auntie today cos I'm bored outta my mind. lol

morning.
barristermum remembering ofcourse Crys is a red head and sounds like she is developing the temper were famous for. Sounds like youve got it sussed. Carry this routine when shes a toddler and throwing a paddy and calm will provail

Hi everyone,

Another quickie here as still in South Africa and on the dial up modem only - took 20 mins to get to this page!
We are still well and enjoying the sunshine.

I took DD for her injections and weighing last week. She hasn't been putting on weight fast enough so she has dropped down a few lines in the red book . The nurse suggested topping up with formula, which I really don't want to do as I feel she's ok - I wasn't in the least worried about her until we actually had her weighed. Plus I feel that I've done all the hard work bf so don't want to give it up now. I started a thread about it in the breast feeding section and, as always, got some really helpful tips and general support. But Monday is D-Day when we go back for our next weigh in so please send me heavy vibes!

Sorry I haven't been able to catch up with the posts properly, although I did see some of the babies are rolling over. DD is trying that but hasn't managed to go all the way yet. But she did find her voice this week so we phoned daddy who is in the UK and "spoke" to him. He misses her lots so was happy to hear her, although it does make him miss her more.

Hope everyone is well and enjoying the weekend!

Hey all back from our hols won't have time to catch up as have a mountain of washing to tackle.
Hope you and all your lo's are ok [smile
The hol was fine although the caravan was abs freezing at night so we slept in the main room with the fire on luckily i had taken a radiator for the kids room so they were fine.
Can't say bf Martha on the beach though with the howling wind was the nicest moment though!

Bluebell don't worry, Nathan is early, they are supposed to roll between the end of the third to the end of the fifth month. Just encourage lots of tummy time. Nathan has been working on it for a few weeks. Talking of which, I have a very frustrated little totty on my hands today as he cannot get it done again (well once or twice but not at will) and he is screaming with frustration. Have told him Rome was not built in a day and try to keep him of it for a bit but he does not listen and even rolls off my chest. He is asleep again. Wonder if he has muscle pain from all the exertion yesterday. He is certainly wearing himself out.

We are out all day tomorrow, first to church about half an hour away and then on to our future parish to view another three houses. The diocesan property officer has told me she is keen on the one I like least. But they have an investment to protect so hey ho. And it is not a bad house. Now Nathan's thrush is gone I hope feeding outside the house will be easier.

Lilyloo - welcome back from holiday!

Barristermum - I hope you're feeling better after the fall. I'm relieved to hear about your instincts being for the LO. I have nightmares about our stairs and have wondered a lot what I would do on instinct - save myself or the baby. It must have been a horrible shock all the same.

Lolo - sorry about all your bad news. Sometimes it just feels relentless, doesn't it. I had a year like that last year. Hope you're having lots of cuddles and comfort.

Amani - SO sorry about your LO's ear. Poor you and poor little tot! Something similar happened to me a couple of years ago - the doctor thought I had a normal ear infections, didn't give antibiotics (which I approve of)sent off the swabs and when they came back she realised I had not one but two incredibly rare, dangerous bugs living in my ear. It wasn't nice. I hope she gets better soon.

BWMum - sending you lots of growth vibes and support. I know how this feels and how worrying it is. I felt so rotten and I really hope LO has put on weight at the next weigh in. I'm off to read your thread and I'll try and post if I think it'll help.

Lucky - you certainly don't need people judging your callson your baby! Doesn't really sound like it's a very supportive mother and baby group! You're better of fwithout it. As to the crying, I've nothing useful to add.

Gingeme - sorry about LOs illnesses. You must be knackered! It's tricky when everyone gets run down. I'm trying to take it easy after our recent bout of pneumonia / bronchitis. How are you feeling yourself?

Madmouse - rolling FAB. I may have missed something but have you had any news about Nathan's vision?

Sabela is not rolling, although she has twisted a bit. She's just not interested! She's desperate to sit and stand though. She keeps obsessively doing what I can only call ab-crunches! I wish her mother would get off her arse and do some!

She actually put herself to sleep the other day! I had her in the moses basket after I had a shower. She was beginning to fret but I needed to loo so I nipped off and when I came back she was sucking her thumb and fast asleep! Score! She also slept from 12-7 last night.

I don't want you thinking all is rosy though. She's going through a bit of a funny phase, teething, nightmares (I think) and also crying if we leave her. I think she's going through that phase when she doesn't understand that we're coming back. She also gets really freaked if we move her usual environment around. She has this hanging circus animal thing on the wall which she adores, chatting with it for hours on end. I took it down to play with her on the floor th other day and all she did was look from it to the wall and look scared. I put it back sharpish.....

BWMum - I'm going to reply here.

I had this problem very early on with DD. She's absolutely fine and so active I can't believe it. She's at the bottom of the graphs - varying between the 2nd and 9th centile.

I knew that I was within my rights to tell the HV to go jump in the lake - especially as she was a cow. But I also did not feel confident enough to do this. I really wanted what was best for Sabela, but was not sure what it was. I did do top-ups, and she is still mixed fed. For us, it has worked, and sometimes I do feel grateful that formula exists. I don't know what would happen if we had switched back to bf. We have come pretty close several times but for different reasons we have kept on with the bottle. I never felt quite confident enough to, I suppose.

I think it might be a lot less worrisome for you in the long run if you continue to exclusively bf. I've always had concerns over its effect on my milk supply, although I've never actually had a problem. People tend to be a bit doomy and gloomy about mixed feeding, but I think it can work.

Although i know I have followed the HV 'advice' - if you can call it that, I do feel we could have probably gone on with the exclusive bf if we had been given more of a chance. I know many HV who are much cooler about the whole issue. And I really hate those growth charts. They're 50 years old and based on bottle fed babies so have no relevance to bf babies.

Anyway, just wanted to offer you support if you continue to exclusively bf,but also to say it has not been a disaster for us and I continue to mainly give Sabela bm.

Susie, we are convinced that Nathan sees and the GP recorded at the 6 week check that he tracked her face. He smiled at under 4 weeks and is very social and loves looking around and at faces. He has a mobile above his cot that is a smiling sunflower face, it does not move or make sound but he coos and grins at it, ditto the toys on his activity arch.

About putting themselves to sleep, I thought I would need a technique so got clued up on the baby whisperer pat and put down trick. Got all geared up to do it, put Nathan down awake and hid next door, cue ten minutes of meeping around in the cot, a yawn a few stretches and that was it. HE was not the one who worried about going to bed awake. He finds it easy to put himself to sleep as long as he is in sleep mood. Despite spending the early weeks (and still now too) falling asleep on top of me!

Thanks Susie
BWmum i really wouldn't rely on those charts if your happy wiht her weight. If you want to continue to bf then do so as you say you have done the hard bit.
Madm Nathan is doing so well you really wouldn't believe the prognosis you had.
For all those mums whose lo's aren't sleeping through i am totally with you Martha still waking for feed 11,3,5 then getting up at 6.30 am v.tired now though and would like her to drop one as she can go 5 hours in the day.
Lolo not sure why things so bad just catching up on Susie post but (((hugs))) anyway.

Thanks everyone for your support. Actually thought I was being optimistic and postive that everything will be ok for DD2 but this afternoon I broke down crying absolutely worried sick about DD2 and terrified that her ears wouldn't heal. Am so so so worried (X 10000000000000000000000000000000). The next two weeks seem like ages and I haven't been sent my appointment through the post yet so I don't even know what date to look forward to...

susiemj - have you had any issues with your ears as a result of the infection...?

Amani ((((hugs))) poor you and lo

Amani, hugs from me too, lots. Looks like you dealt with the situation really bravely and calmly and now you are letting the emotions out.

Appointment letters always come very late. I would just ring the secretary of the consultant you are under and make an appointment. Nothing wrong with that and at least you get seen on time.

Amani - Hugs from me (and sloppy kisses from Aaliyah) please try and keep your chin up. I'm sure everything will come out ok in the end. We're here for you if you need us.

Amani - my ear is FINE. And my infection really was awful.

I agree with MM. Ring the secretary.

MM - I'm glad. Do you know? In that picture you put up it really seemed as if he was looking at someone and responding. That's why I asked.

MM - Those pictures of Nathan are gorgeous!!

I just managed to put Aaliyah down for an afternoon nap, in her cot, in her own room!! I'm gonna have a kip now!

I've put up some new pics of Sabela

Beautiful Susie just beautiful
Not sure how but George slept realy well last night. We went to my sil for my nieces bday party yesterday and George had his last bottle at 6pm. Came home about 8 got the other two off to bed and put George to bed at 9pm. No bottle or anything! He then slept till 5.18 am had a bottle then slept till 7.30. Settled him back with his dummy where he slept till 9.30. I actualy feel half human today
Hope everyone is keeping well . x

Hey ladies,

Amani - just wanted to say I am thinking of you and if you wanna have a chat or soemthing give me a call.

Lucky - DS1 was quite a hungry baby and I switched to the number 2 milk very early on with him and it worked a treat, it is worth a go and if she dooesnt like it etc then you can switch back.

Shocked that people comment on those things at the toddler groups. Dont give up on them though, I went to a million different ones when DS2 was born and slowly found one that I liked better than the others so just search around and find another one. I find mine invaluable.

About the screaming I would be inclined to leave DS2 when he screams, I tend to hold his hands and he calms down or as already suggested put my hand on his chest or something. I think it is ok to sort of leave them as long as you keep checking back not just walking away and leaveing them for 30 mins screaming IYSWIM. Sometimes trying to soothe them can be counterproductive. Plus, I think each time it happens it is different, they are angry for different reasons etc.

Not much going on this end. Have finally managed to get DH a little more hands on with DS1 in taking him to the park and things at the weekend, i think he has finally realised that if he occupies him with activities and tires him out it makes for a much happier and less stressful household.

DS1 is very clingy at the moment, I cant cook or have a bath without him following me. He sat outside the bathroom door for 30 mins the other day waiting for meto finish. Bit worried about how he is going to cope when i start work next week, although he loves being with both sets of grandparents so hopefully this will soften the blow and once the pt hours kick in hopefully if I plan the week we can still get as much out of it as we do now.

Very proud pf myself. Yesterday cooked myslef some weight watchers recipes which i have frozen and today have cooked two massive curries for DH.

DS2 isnt turning over or anything just yet althop seems to be trying a bit. He is very awake and alert and hardly sleeps in the day which bodes well for the night as he sleeps from about 8-9 till 7 - 8.

I'm feeling like a terrible mother today as nothing is going right.

I put Aaliyah down in her cot and 5 minutes later she woke up again screaming. I ran upstairs to check on her as she normally just grumbles and she's screaming cos she's been fantastically sick all over herself and her bedding! So I changed her and the bedding and it took me 1 and 1/2 hrs to get her back to sleep, put her in her cot and the same thing happened again.

This is just wrong. I've rang the HV to arrange a homevisit cos them telling me everything is ok, can't be right.

Also, i've tried feeding her and she gulps it all down and then throws up, I know she's putting on weight cos she's been weighed but even so, surely that's not good enough. I don't mind so much but its keeping her awake when she is obviously shattered.

I just don't know what to do.... I keep breaking down into tears and getting annoyed at her for throwing up but its not her fault I know that and so far all the yelling has just been done in my head.

On a seperate note seeing as i'm on one here anyway I'm completely PEED off with DP. Over the past 2 days we've not seen him, he's come home and gone to bed and not got up till 1./2 hr before work, I've tried waking him earlier and he just won't get up. The other day she was SCREAMING downstairs but I had to pee so I ran up the stairs to the toilet and got met by him saying wha'ts the matter with her? WHY THE HELL DON'T YOU COME DOWNSTAIRS AND FIND OUT INSTEAD OF SHOUTING AT ME FOR NOT KEEPING HER QUIET?
This morning he came in and went on the computer then went to bed while I had a grumpy baby on my hands who didn't want to be put down but wasn't too pleased at being help either.
I know he's working but he only works 9 hour nights why does he get to sleep for 12 hours some days? Whats the difference between him and me? I'm just not getting paid for my job.
He doesn't help me with the housework and gets annoyed if there's not enough plates for him to make some dinner for himself, or his workclothes aren't washed?

I'm just soooo fed up with everything, I feel like burying my head in the sand!!

Sorry girls, thanks for letting me yell.