TTC First Baby Catch-up With Our Babies Continued!!

[ELW85]

Hi all

As I’m rubbish and keep double posting I thought I’d start a new thread as we’re nearly at 1k.
I don’t have all of the OG’s so apologies for anyone I miss or anyone I miss in general (blaming lack of coffee this morning!!)

@Delilah7 @RanchoRelaxo @MrsR16 @thumper59 @trashkitten10 @Bostonfern @crossfitgirl @Fivebyfive2 @MrsEG @purplefig @LarryDavid @Lemonysherbet @Stormtrooperjulian @MrsH497 @LokiCat @Cupcakesandglitter

Morning all

I really wanted to thank you for your incredibly kind words and all of the support you’ve given me.
The messages and hand holding have been amazing and I honestly couldn’t have done it without you.
A really special thank you to @purplefig @MrsEG @MrsR16 for taking extra steps to check in on me, when I didn’t realise I needed it.

This little group is the most supportive group of people I’ve ever known and I feel honoured to have you as friends.

I honestly don’t feel like I’ve done anything more than any mum would for their children, but thank you for your beautiful words (I had happy tears!)
That little boy is my world and I won’t have anyone fail him; he’s too important and can’t advocate for himself so I’ll never rest until he’s got what he needs and I know he’s ok. But that’s just being a mama and what we’d all do ❤️

I’m gonna ease myself back into MN life over the next few days so bear with. I’m still not feeling amazing but I’m getting there.

@Fivebyfive2 - how you flat out haven’t told your MiL to fuck right off yet is beyond me 😂
I’m so pleased you tested negative though; that must have been so scary for you all xx

@thumper59 - thank you!
You and Freddie are looking gorgeous as ever! Xx

@ELW85 I'm so pleased things are looking positive, I've been thinking (worrying) about you and so glad things are looking up :)

@Fivebyfive2 Joe looks so grown up! Lost his proper little baby cheeks. Your PIL sound like a right pair! Glad you stood up for yourself and your test came back negative.

@Lemonysherbet Jack is gorgeous and looks like he's going to be well into weaning by the look on his face seeing that pizza 😂 Such a strong boy trying to sit up! How is your mood today?

@thumper59 You look fab as always! Daisy is only a few days older than Freddie and I agree it's a lovely age, feel like her personality is just shining more and more each day ☺️

@MrsH497 Sorry you're still finding lockdown hard :( are you managing to get out much? Charlotte is scrummy and is holding her head up brilliantly!

@LikeTheFruit Ahh the multiple wakings sound rough :( was last night any better?

@TrashKitten10 - thank you! Just keeping everything crossed that the EEG is normal but I’m pretty reassured by the neurologists xx

@ELW85 that's an amazing update. I'm so pleased for you. Finn is so lucky to have you fighting to get all the answers for him. I'm glad the neurologist is going to give Finn's drs a kick to at least get the EEG done. Hopefully that will come back all clear as well.
I hope you're able to get help with the PNA. Well done for recognizing it and hopefully you can start enjoying it a lot more now. Huge hugs for you 💕

@purplefig Alayna is 4 months now so her startle reflex is still quite strong. She's not having any luck without the swaddle but I don't think the regression is helping either!
I think I'm going to start doing the same as you with condoms and natural cycle tracking. I was on a combined pill previously and it completely messed me up!
Poor M, I hope she's feeling a bit better with the teething? Hopefully they'll cut soon!

@MrsEG I hope lunch with DH was nice? DH and I did the same for our anniversary whilst my mum looked after Alayna. It was so nice going out to enjoy time together just the two of us, which we hadn't had since mid March!
Sorry to hear your PND wasn't ever addressed properly, but I'm glad you're able to get some counseling now. I really hope it helps ❤️ for what it's worth, it sounds like you're doing absolutely brilliantly with the boys. I struggle with Alayna and I'm always amazed when I read your updates at how well you're doing with the boys (of course I know they must have their days as well).

@LikeTheFruit so sorry about the multiple wake ups. We're right there with you (regression I think rather than teething) and it's so difficult, especially to then try and get through the day without feeling like a zombie! I hope things start getting better.

@MrsH497 oh look at her 😍 she's absolutely gorgeous! Alayna is definitely a daddy's girl as well. It's like, hello, I did all the hard work for 9 months? 🙄 I absolutely love seeing her and DH together though. So pleased to hear is reflex is better!

@thumper59 you look so stunning and look at little Freddie 🥰 so cute! How exciting to start thinking about his first birthday!! I can't wait to plan Alayna's 🙊
I hope his taster day at nursery goes well.

@Lemonysherbet awww I love Jack with the pizza, such a cutie! Alayna is exactly the same with tummy time on the the playmat so we try it on our chests instead and she seems to enjoy it a lot more. She hates lying down for too long as well, it always seems like she just wants to get up and go!
Sorry to hear you've had a difficult few days. Are you able to have a few hours to yourself to pop to the shops or even just for a coffee whilst DH/someone else looks after him? Or even just to have some me time with a little bath. Definitely look after yourself too lovely 💕

@Fivebyfive2 so pleased you've tested negative! Glad you stood up to your PILs and I guess it worked out for the best that MIL is ignoring you 👀 hopefully she listens and doesn't try to come round! I don't think you're being OTT at all.

@TrashKitten10 so pleased Daisy's afternoon naps are better. I'm with you on the perfect mummies all over Instagram.
I'm so thankful we have this outlet. If I ever need advice my first thought is to come here because I know we're all open with each other and no judgements are made!

Sorry huge catch up post! 🙈
So last night we decided to try a mixture of shhh/pat and pick up/put down, which worked brilliantly and she fell asleep on her own within 20 minutes. However then it all went to shit - her first stretch of sleep was under 2 hours, whereas normally it'll be at least 3-4 hours, then she was up every 45 minutes as she has been doing for the past week. I gave up at 4am and just brought her into bed with me. Do you think this is because of the regression and I shouldn't try this until she's through the regression? The other thing I've noticed is that when she wakes up crying at night she doesn't open her eyes. If I soothe her on my shoulder/feed her she falls asleep straight away and it's really difficult waking her up again (I tried blowing on her face and she actually smiled in her sleep last night!!) so I can't seem to put her back down awake. Any advice? I don't know how much longer I can do this 😫
DH also had to go into work today so I couldn't even get a lie in - I'm absolutely exhausted 🙈

My mums birthday today so going into town once Alayna wakes up to get a cake and some balloons then I think we're going out for an early dinner.

I hope all have a lovely day! Xx

@LokiCat oh man your post is a flashback to my life a few months ago!! I gave up trying to encourage sleep during the regression and just got through it by cosleeping and then doing shifts with DH. Then once she was over the worst of it we did gradual retreat and it's worked wonders. You've got this mama 💪🏼 it will get better!

@ELW85 😘😘😘

@Fivebyfive2 I don't think you're being OTT at all. Even if you were they're your boundaries and your in-laws have to learn to respect them.

@LikeTheFruit we're the same as MrsEG and teething hasn't affected sleep.

Ooo gotta go awake baby! x

@purplefig I actually did think of you when posting this, as I remember you previously posted that M was only sleeping 45 minutes at a time some nights. You've given me hope considering how well M is sleeping now after you did gradual retreat! I just really hope this is over soon!! Thank you 💕

Hi all, hope everyone is having a good weekend?

Sorry I'm struggling to keep up the last few days, suddenly feeling very overwhelmed with life! I've a back to work meeting next week to see about my start date. We are looking around nurseries. Joe is not sleeping again, or even napping and is determined to crawl but getting so frustrated bless him! And it's somehow still kicking off with the outlaws 😮

On the plus side, I'm feeling totally over my flu type thing, staying at my parents Mon night with Joe and have had some epic meals this last week; seriously, if anyone was on the fence about trying hello fresh or something like it, definitely give it a go, I thought it would be a rip off but the meals we've had were so fab and it was very convenient!

@Fivebyfive2 hey lovely! Glad to hear you're over your flu-y thing! Nothing worse than being ill... oh, Joe! You were doing so well!!! He'll get there! Ethan's only been sleeping through the night for a week or so! Trying to get him to nap today while we were out was a nightmare!! But I fought and I won! What's the latest with your outlaws (love that expression btw!)??

My work confirmed with me that they're happy with my new hours! I've never worked part time in my life, so it will be strange but good 😊 28 hours per week! I get Tuesdays off haha!

Sorry I haven't caught up properly, but it's great to see everyone, especially those we haven't heard from in a little while!! ❤️

@LokiCat oh god yeah it's just dreadful isn't it??? Are you getting any sleep? Can DH do some?? That's the only way we muddled through. Then as soon as it settled down (about 6 or so weeks after it started) I had enough grim determination to stick at gradual retreat, and that's completely sorted her out so far. Big hugs, it's rough this bit.

@Fivebyfive2 so glad you're feeling better! And your meals sound so good. I've made more of an effort this week and it's been so lovely and I feel way healthier too which is always nice. Sorry to hear you're a bit overwhelmed at the mo, it's tough sometimes isn't it? Not helped by a lack of sleep im sure! How olds the little man now? Would you / have you considered any type of gentle sleep training? (Please feel free to tell me to F off!!!). God your outlaws sound non stop drama!!!

@MrsR16 oh part time hours sound fab! I bet that's a weight off having it confirmed? So pleased Ethan is sleeping better. Was it a regression?? Dreading the next one!!

How are we all? I'm having great fun tracking my cycle again, it's a right throwback to our TTC thread (but so far without all the tears from me!!) had a positive OPK today and tonight I can feel myself ovulating 😂 sat with a hot water bottle as it's actually quite a strong feeling!

Today was lovely. Nipped into our nearest big town for the first time since lockdown and stocked up on baby clothes. Soooo nice to pick my own items....no pink!!! 😂 I love pink but nearly allllll her hand me downs and gifts are pink. Picked up some seriously cute M&S and Gap dungarees in the charity shop for £2 each 🙌🏻 forgot how much I love a bargain!

@MrsR16 I am the only twin mum at sensory! And with Covid no one can come and help me. So sometimes it’s rough! But it’s only 45 mins a week and I always feel better for getting out and going!
Excellent news about your work - part time is going to feel weird isn’t it?! Don’t know what I’ll do with my Monday’s off!!

@thumper59 Ah I bet he’ll love nursery - literallt all my friends with kids say it’s amazing for them and their development, social skills etc - it’s harder for us haha!

@MrsH497 So pleased that the reflux seems better for you now! And great news on a new car too!

@Lemonysherbet He is gorgeous! I was often very tearful in the first few months. I remember once sobbing over a fast asleep Ruairí apologising for not making his bottle fast enough earlier on in the day. Being a mum is a bloody emotional rollercoaster. How is your mood generally? The boys hated tummy time and I never forced it and one day they just started rolling over and now they’re always on their bellies. They figure it all out in their own time!

@Fivebyfive2 I don’t think you’re being OTT at all. It’s probably going to do you the world of good actually to be putting some boundaries in place now and reminding them you’re mum and what you say goes!
Sorry to hear Joe isn’t sleeping again, that boy is a night owl isn’t he?! I don’t know how you’re doing it - you’re a hero for getting through it all you really are. He will sleep through eventually!!

@ELW85 you are doing so, so well, you really are and I hope you know that. What a start to motherhood you’ve had. Finn is beyond lucky to have you as his mum!

@LokiCat sometimes I don’t know how I do it with two either haha! I’m glad I never had one first to compare it to - it’s all I’ve known! How is she sleeping now? It could be a regression in which case we just had to write those weeks off, they were really hard. But a regression should only really last a few weeks - and I did make sure we stuck to their bedtime routine the whole way through top to help get us back on track! Hope you’ve managed to get some sleep this week.

@purplefig you’ve given me the push to quit the pill! I hate it and it does me no favours. We’re using condoms like teenagers and I’ll start tracking my cycle when AF (ha! Feels so weird writing that) comes back again. I’m utterly terrified of another pregnancy though so a vasectomy is also on the cards! Sounds like an excellent day shopping!!

@TrashKitten10 Ah yes I love that FB weaning group!! It’s so helpful for advice and recipes (although I find the ‘food under 1 is just for fun’ argument very conflicting!!)

Sorry for the mammoth catch up! My god we’ve been in a teething hell. Ruairí now has 4 teeth and Conor has 2 with a third cutting, the gum has just broken. It’s horrible! They just cry and whinge all the damn day long. I sometimes feel like I’m losing my mind!! I’m constantly out walking just as they shut up in the pram!!!
An otherwise okay week though to be honest - sensory, nice walk and pub trip with the NCT girls, had the family round, me and DH went for a baby free meal (THE BEST THREE HOURS OF MY WEEK), and I even went on a night out on Thursday with friends! Drank far too much and had a hangover all of Friday. Let me tell you - babies do NOT understand when mummy just needs a quiet day!
Here’s the chaps munching on a melty puff mid-walk today to keep them quiet. Parent of the year, me.
Have great bank holidays!

Ladies talk to me about the 4 month sleep regression. Charlotte is 16 weeks on Wednesday and I have a feeling we are heading in that direction. Any tips?
Also can she have her comforter in the snuzpod with her? I feel I'd be happier taking it out before I go to sleep so she can't suffocate herself. Am I being over anxious?

She's definitely more clingy at the moment and I can see she's frustrated that she can't always roll over when she wants to. Struggling today I'm really tired, I find that I'll have a couple of days of being really tired almost like the tiredness just catches up with me all at once.

How is everyone?

@MrsEG, love the pic! Ha ha you make me laugh, you are a fab mum! We went out last week and when Joe started getting fussy I gave him a baby biscuit to munch on 😂

@MrsR16, aaaahhh I so hope Joe follows Ethans lead soon!

Both of you, how are you excited to be thinking about work again? I'm so torn, feeling like we've been in such a bubble (probably even more since lock down) and soon it'll be time for the real world, if that makes sense? It's nice in a way, but scary?? I think I'll be doing 4 days a week too 🙂

@purplefig, I know this sounds mad, but it's like every time I start thinking we need to train, it gets a bit better and we don't go through with it. But I think that now we're finally in a routine (for the most part) we might try and go for it. I really need him in his own room soon before he outgrows the snuzpod and we're stuck and I know I need to get away from feeding him to sleep so I can get some more freedom now 'real life' is starting up a bit more again.

Dh has sent his mum yet another 'back off please' message so hopefully she gets it. My dad has called to say he saw a fb post of fil and mil with family out for a meal and said if they give me any more crap, he's reporting them 😂

@MrsEG @MrsR16 ignore the 'how' in my back to work question, I meant to say So, are you excited?! Xx

@purplefig, he is 8.5 months 🙂

@MrsEG I saw your Insta updates earlier!! I feel for you! God, being the only twin mummy and with no-one allowed to come and help must be challenging! I'm sure the others will all understand though 😊 part time's definitely going to feel weird! Ooh, long weekends for you! I was secretly hoping for Wednesdays off but I'm not going to whinge...

@MrsH497 I can't say we suffered hugely with the 4 month regression. However, the 8 month regression is something else! Not wanting to put you off already - I hope Charlotte sails through them! I had comforters in the crib with Ethan and just made sure to keep an eye on him and he didn't have them when I went to sleep. You're doing a wonderful job, don't forget!!

@Fivebyfive2 I'm genuinely not excited to be going back to work. I don't want to leave my boy! However, he gets on great with his childminder and I definitely need some money haha so we'll work it out and it will be fine! As far as sleep training goes, I've never trained Ethan, still feed him to sleep in the evenings, still cuddle him to sleep all the time! I think for some people it works really well (@MrsEG, looking at you!) and others it's just not the right thing for them. Good on your DH! And your dad to be fair!

@MrsR16 thank you I know I'm very harsh on myself. My mum tells me off for it! I can't even think about going back to work.
I need to work on being more sociable and try baby massage or baby sensory. I try and meet with the NCT ladies I'm just naturally a shyer person so lockdown really hasn't helped that 😂

We've been using condoms as I've said I don't want to go back on the pill or have anything chemically (we'd like to try for number 2 so don't want to have to come off anything again)

Hopefully the regression won't be too bad I do love her little personality coming through.

How old are the other babies now? Anyone else thinking of having more?

@MrsR16, I feel the same about work, a bit surprised actually as I thought I'd be at least a bit excited to go back, even if just to see people again?!

I think we may have hit the 8 months regression 🙁 Last night was the 2nd night in a row of Joe waking every 2 hours and refusing to be put down. I had to hold him for ages until I knew he was properly asleep, haven't had to do that for absolutely ages, I'm knackered!! Let's see how he naps today... I think he's ready to drop a, nap maybe, but weirdly he seems to be trying to drop the afternoon one?! So he has a short nap (30 ish mins) in the morning and then refuses/fights the afternoon nap. Then he'll sleep in the late afternoon instead?! The only plus is I'm managing to get him re settled in the early hours, so he's been waking 6/6.30 for a while 🙂 Dreading when the clocks go back though 😮

@MrsH497 the 4 month regression is very hard, I also struggled a lot with the boys sleep when they learned to roll over a few weeks later - anything learning a new skill really messes with sleep! My only tip is just try and stick with your bedtime routine as much as possible, it’ll really help you get back on track when it’s over. For us the regression lasted about 3 weeks and you just have to buy coffee and red bull and power through it!! We don’t use comforters they just don’t seem bothered by them but I know plenty who do and they just take them off them again once they’ve fallen asleep. I think once they’re a bit older they can have them all night though, from 1 I think?? That’s when they can have duvets and stuff too so suffocation risk is way down.
The twins are 7 months old next week and definitely definitely no more kids for us!!!!!!

@Fivebyfive2 All hail snacks for calming a fussy baby haha! I’m 50:50 about work. If I could never go back, I wouldn’t - but some days the idea of someone else looking after them all day and me getting the ‘break’ of work I’m genuinely excited for! Adult conversation, no risk of having milk or pasta spat on my outfit. Someone else trying to settle them during the day. Bring it on!! Plus - my niece is in nursery, and her development and social skills came on leaps and bounds when she started. Her speech is so advanced and she had loads of little friends! So I’m excited for that for the boys too. I’m only doing 4 day’s so I’ll still have a 3-day weekend with the boys too :)

@MrsR16 yeah my sister has mid-week days off and loves it, always a baby or toddler class going on somewhere! @Fivebyfive2 yep correct - sleep training worked absolute wonders for us, but it isn’t for everyone - you just need to do what works for you and your family!

@Fivebyfive2 Just saw your other update - yep the boys have just dropped nap 3. They now have 1 hour about half 9 and 1.5 hours at 1 and that’s them done for the day. They can get a bit grotty later on but just will not go down again!!

@MrsR16 @Fivebyfive2 ahhh I feel you! I thought I'd be raring to go back to work but if I didn't have to I think I'd just take this time out to focus on this small but significant season of life. I'm self employed so planning to do one full day a week and then maybe the odd evening/weekend if needed. I'm really keen to avoid nursery until she's a bit older and luckily my mum can have her on my one day. I honestly think women should do whatever they want when it comes to work/staying home, but I do wish the latter was an option for those who wanted to. The cost of living feels too expensive for the average family to get by on one wage these days. And then there's the social stigma. Also the whole having your identity tied to work and not wanting to be "just a mum" smacks of rampant capitalism...surely we're all multifaceted beings with more to us than JUST work or JUST motherhood. I guess I just feel that ultimately someone has to look after the baby....so surely if one of the parents want to that should be possible. Anyway I'll stop ranting 😂

@MrsEG ahhh your week sounds epic!! A night out!! How was it?! Worth the hangover?? I feel like I've lost my ability to drink since being pregnant...I have a few sips and seem to get an instant headache. So rubbish. Hahaha god you're right condoms are a right throwback to teenage years 😂. DH will be going down the vasectomy route too once we're done having kids. I guess we just need to be super careful until then. The whole "food before one is just for fun" line is a pet peeve of mine because I just don't buy it, not where my hungry M is concerned anyway 😂 speaking of which, she's a big fan of melty puffs too. The boys look so similar in your latest pic 😍. How's weaning going? Are they still enjoying it?

@MrsH497 it seemed to drag on forever for us, but in reality I think it happened and then the change to her sleep cycles negatively affected her sleep and then that's what we were dealing with. Basically her inability to self soothe meant she was up at the end of each cycle. It didn't get better until she learnt how to put herself to sleep without us interfering. I feel like all I ever do is bang on about it but we used the gradual retreat method with surprising success!

@Fivebyfive2 it doesn't sound mad at all!!! You have to just do what you feel comfortable with ❤️. Like MrsEG said you're doing so amazingly!! How many naps does he do atm?? On the days M gets up at 7am and has decent naps she's down to two a day now. Glad your DH put the in-laws in their place. I only learnt about the concept of boundaries a few years ago and now I'm their biggest fan 😆👌🏼

Have a lovely Sunday all! Any nice plans? X

@purplefig yeah it literally makes no sense to me - surely the whole point of weaning is weaning them off their milk and on to food.... Weaning is going okay! We’re still just on lunch, they’ve had porridge a few times but I’ll move to two meals next week at 7 months and aim for 3 around 8-9 months (literally based on what the HV said to me, but mainly as those timings work in my brain too!! Slow and steady!) Weaning two at once has been quite tough in all honesty, some days if I’m on my own it takes up so much of my time. But we’re getting there! They gobbled up a load of orzo yesterday so really enjoying their textures now!
It was so worth the hangover - it sounds weird but I just felt like ‘me’ again, I just had a normal bag with me, I had make up on! The same when me and DH went for our baby-free meal, we agreed no baby talk - after a glass of wine we were our old selves talking crap and had an absolute ball. I had a blip when I spotted the time and thought ‘I hope mum has them up from their nap now...’ but I just put it to the back of my mind! I knew they were safe and I just wanted to enjoy our few hours!! I thoroughly recommend it!!
Do you have an idea in mind as to how many children you’d like, any timescales? Or are you just gonna see how you get on with M first!

@MrsEG exactly! And I know with BF babies they need to start needing a food source of iron around 6 months, so yeah, it's deffo not just for fun. I bet it's been messy with two, I'm so bloody in awe of you!! Big part of why we're done spoon feeding tbh 😳! Funny you mentioned orzo...M has been on baby pasta and so we're getting orzo in tonight's food shop 🙌🏻. Ahhh so glad you had fun and felt like 'you', it's so important to take a break. Fab rule for you and DH too...think I'll pinch it. DH and I have only had two baby free stints and both times we ended up looking at pics of her 🙃. Have you got any more dates in the pipeline? Mum keeps offering to babysit....why oh why am I not taking her up on it?!?! Nonsensical. So I think we want two with around a 2.5/3 year age gap, but obviously that's just a rough idea as we all know what fun TTC can be. Part of me wants three...madness. As full on as life is right now for you it's so incredible two kids right away! And they'll have such a bond ❤️ deffo no chance of a cheeky third for you? 😂 x

@Fivebyfive2 Ahh you poor thing :( Could you push the second nap back by 30 mins-1hr and drop the third nap? Maybe he needs to be a bit more tired before nap 2. I found the 2-3-4 schedule for two naps which seems to be working well. Put them down for their first nap 2 hours after waking, then second nap 3 hours after waking from nap 1, then bedtime 4 hours after nap 2. We've been on 2 naps since about 6 months as Daisy had really long naps and an early bedtime and we just couldn't fit in nap 3 but it's always worked really well for us. Nap time is so traumatic at times it's nice not to have a battle it an extra time 😂

@purplefig Totally agree with you about how it should be a more realistic possibility for parents to be able to stay at home if they want. There is no way we could afford to live on DH's wage and we don't exactly live the high life! From a child development perspective the best option for under 2s is to be with their primary caregiver. I say that from a completely non-judgemental perspective as I'm going back to work part time and I'm looking forward to the break haha but if that's best for babies (admittedly not always best for parents as we are not all suited to being a SAHP) then it should be made possible. The government I think just want to push parents back into work and babies into childcare. Great if that works for you but for some families it's just an inevitable rather than a choice, which is sad.

@MrsEG Love the food before one debates! I think it's another 'breast is best' slogan where a very complex process is minimised to a catchy rhyme. Babies/toddlers have a narrow window to introduce new tastes and textures and need more vitamins than can be provided by milk after 6 months and so weaning isn't just 'fun', it's really important. However Daisy has been a generally good eater, I think it's good reassurance for babies who are slow to wean to remember that they still get plenty of calories from milk and so there's no point getting stressed about solids, especially in the early months. Your comment about the bag made me laugh, that was one of my favourite moments of being out on my own. In fact the first time I dropped her off at my parents to go out I realised I had all my phone/purse/keys in the change bag and had no other bag so my mum had to lend me one ☺️ Glad you had a lovely time out, you deserve some good quality baby free time :)

@MrsEG, I also meant to say, the pic of the boys made me smile because Joe had those baby grows from Next too, I love them 🙂

@purplefig, omg same with everything you wrote about how skewed society is about 'just' being this or that!! Like, do the people who were raised by sahm not get what a smack in the face it is to their own parents by saying 'just' a mum?! And before I was a mum, I wasn't 'just' an accountant?!

I'm also a bit skeptical of the 'just for fun' weaning term. I think it may be to reassure those whose babies maybe don't eat so well; so as long as they're still getting all the milk they need, it's OK that it takes a while? But if the baby is one who loves food and eats for England, it's probably another story? I find alot of the advice very general tbh. When Joe got the hang of finger foods a bit more, we tried a more blw approach... All the books etc were like 'give a banana and your baby will just mush it/nibble it'... Joe literally tried ramming the whole finger size thing into his mouth, I almost hyperventilated! So now we still do a mix of finger foods and roughly mashed/blitzed food that he spoon feeds himself.

Just gone on an online shopping spree, stocked the boy up with Autumn clothes 😎

@TrashKitten10 yes that's exactly how I feel!!! Absolutely zero judgement if not, but if the parent WANTS to stay at home surely it's in the child's AND societies best internet for this to be facilitated. That said, I'm happy to do family care one day a week (I totally recognise this is a privilege!!) and then do nursery when she's older and the free hours kick in. Also totally agree with you about weaning. I'm sure all these slogans are well meaning but they reduced a nuanced topic down to an unhelpfully blunt, vague sentiment imho. Though like Daisy, M loves her food so I can see how it might reassure people with tricky eaters. When do you go back to work?

@Fivebyfive2 100% agree! I think the dismissive attitude has its roots in our patriarchal society that sees caring work as undeserving of proper remuneration / respect. And YES!!! We aren't, surely, any one thing anyway. Really grinds my gears!! Totally agree about advice being general...absolutely no way I could give m a chunk of steamed broccoli atm...it would end up on the floor 😂. Ooooo where did you get the boys autumn threads from?? I be just stocked up on dungarees...such an adorable outfit ❤️