Ttc first baby catch up with our babies!

[Fivebyfive2]

Just putting this on in case anyone wants to catch up? We're all at different stages, so might be able to help each other out?

@Delilah7 @RanchoRelaxo @MrsR16 @thumper59 @trashkitten10 @Bostonfern @crossfitgirl sorry I know I'm missing people, I'm blaming newborn brain!

I'll leave the link on the 'pregnancy' catching up thread xxx

And he self-settled!
Sorry for the double post but I’m in shock.

Now to figure out how to do it for the evenings by putting him in our room. More questions than answers. FML!!

@stormtrooperjulian Yeah I’ve also heard 18 months is the right amount of time for any woman’s body to recover from pregnancy! My sister was told similar and she had a vaginal birth. I can’t even imagine even thinking about trying to get pregnant again; I’ll have my fingers and toes crossed for all of you going for number 2!!

@ELW85 Whooop! Is that his cot in the nursery? The boys sleep better in there than anywhere else! It’s what helped push me to move them there full time!

@MrsEG - it is in the nursery. I feel awful though; after 40 mins he wouldn’t resettle. I did PU/PD but the second he hit his cot he started crying again so I got him up, did his nappy and now we’re having a feed.
I managed to resettle him a couple of times so maybe he just wanted up.
I’m scared I’ve upset him!

@ELW85 if he slept in it I'd chalk it up as a win for sure! And like you say, maybe he was ready for up after 40 mins. I think the more of a routine you do, the more you pick up on their natural rhythms. E.g. I've noticed M likes a shorter nap than what BW recommends in the morning, but usually makes up for it with a longer snooze in the afternoon. So I now don't bother resettling after she's done an hour in the morning. You're doing an amazing job mama and don't you forget it!

Right guys, I'm going to take a bit of a break from mumsnet I think. Lockdown has got me all phone obsessed again and it doesn't feel good. I'm also finding all the different opinions about topics a bit overwhelming to navigate.

I know it wasn't anyone's intention, but all the weaning chat made me have a massive wobble. And reflecting on it, there was no need for me to wobble. M lapped it up, swallowed loads and banged her fist on the high chair for more . She slept the best she's slept in ages last night (probably a coincidence and we'll be back to business as usual tonight) and she's happy as larry today.

It's weird old times and I've really got to stay on top of mental health stuff and I can feel it sliding a bit with internet overwhelm. I'm sure I'll be back once I've got my head straight. Until then I wish you all the absolute best. Take care and enjoy your scrummy babies! xxx

@purplefig, hopefully see you back soon xx You are doing an awesome job with M, she'll be bossing James Bond around in no time 😛

@ELW85, go Finn, what a star 😀🌟

@MrsEG, I laughed at your comment on Ruiri eating the mat, Joe did that too 😂 You're getting contact from your hv?? Did you have to initiate that can I ask? I've not heard from mine since our 6 week checks!! I called the helpline a few times since but they've never been in touch with me... I'd actually quite like to hear from them! Xx

Loving the weaning talk ladies, it's such a minefield!! Joe is 6 months today and we tried him on some brocoli and carrots pureed... He was a bit unsure, but took a good couple of mouthfuls without spitting it out or crying, so yay! I feel a bit bad for not going right to blw but I'm just not confident enough yet, especially as I'm alone with him most of the times where it's best for him to eat. Does that make me a wuss / bad mom?! I hope not... Tomorrow I'm trying him in a spoon of ready brek in the morning 😀

I had a social distance walk with my NCT friend and her baby today it was so lovely! Joe slept the entire walk, just over 2 hours 😂

Happy Friday all!!

@purplefig hope you're ok. You're an amazing mummy. Totally understand how lockdown can affect your mental health and the need for a break/detox. Sending love x

@purplefig Hope you’re okay! Never ever let someone else’s opinion think that yours is wrong; ever! You are M’s mum and you and only you know what is the best for her. Sounds like she is absolutely loving it too! Hope you enjoy the break - I did a similar thing with FB when I was ruthlessly attacked for asking for help with formula on a breastfeeding group. In hindsight I was asking for it a bit, but still!! Have a great time with M with this new stage :)

@Fivebyfive2 Just because some mums go right in with carrot sticks doesn’t mean you have to!! You do exactly what you’re comfortable with. I know exactly what you mean, total minefield! I found I got the best advice from other mum friends who’d done it before. Lots of nifty tips and tricks!! Has Joe made the big move to the nursery??
Conor is still weighed every month as a ‘priority case’ as he was so so unwell as a baby - he dropped to like 5lb and his kidneys weren’t functioning. That with the reflux, they like to keep a close eye on his weight!

@ELW85 mate I would say that is a huge win for first time in the cot!! The fact he even fell asleep in there is super impressive!! My first attempt they just cried and I had to take them back out!!! Well done you and Finn!

Gahhh Conor has been a challenge today. We’ve been weaning him off the colief and clearly it was the wrong decision to make! Had a very good chat with the GP who was very happy for us to go back to his normal dose and keep on it until he is 6 months and weaning - apparently this can help the lactose issue? That and his digestive system will be more mature. So, fingers crossed! He’s been just a screaming nightmare all afternoon!

@MrsEG, aaahh I see! Oh bless Connor, I hope he feels better soon and fingers crossed you have an OK night! We haven't done the move yet... Dh has been getting back late every night so we haven't really got organised. He has Thursday and Friday off this week coming though, so I think we're gonna do it then. So it's starting food this weekend and then the nursery next weekend 🙂

Ladies, we were so close to greatness! Joe had a feed and went to sleep... In his snuzpod... On his own! First time in yonks he's managed it! I trotted downstairs, feeling all pleased with myself, got my ice cream out the freezer... Just digging my spoon in and 'WWAAAAAHHHH' 😂🙄🤯🙁 Managed to re settle him, I'm just in bed now, sod it!

On the plus side found this gem of a thread on aibu if anyone needs a chuckle!

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3936889-to-ask-you-about-the-worst-mistake-you-ve-made-at-work

Hope everyone has a good night! Xx

@Fivebyfive2 doesn't make you a wuss at all, do whatever is right for you!

Dex refused his morning nap today, no idea why, so he's been an overtired nightmare for most of the day. He was clearly so so tired but he would not go to sleep no matter what I tried. He went to bed nicely this evening though so hopefully he'll sleep well tonight. Hopefully the 8 month regression doesn't last too long!

Well, he woke at 10 for about 15 mins, asleep until 2, I'm thinking yeah not too bad... It was 4am by the time he was properly settled and then he woke at 5.30 and I just held him until dh woke up at 6.30 and they went downstairs. Eugh. I'm definitely doing something wrong but at the moment haven't got the energy to figure out a way forward. Will just power through until he's in his room in a weeks time and if it's still no better after that, dh has 2 weeks off at the end of the month so we'll have to use that time to try to put something in place. On the plus side, Joe had a bath this morning and loved having a splash 😂 We're seeing dh's nan later (pre booked appointment in the garden of her care home) it will be so lovely as she's just head over heels for her chunky great grandson! And maybe tonight I'll try Joe on some ready brek, might fill him up a bit?!

Here is Joe getting excited by his new favourite thing... A water bottle 😂

Anyone got weekend plans? Xxx

Wow this thread moves fast!
Morning all 😊

@MrsH497 I tried using a groswaddle initially, but I don't think she liked having her arms tight against the chest so just cried the whole time! I ended up getting the ones that swaddle her arms to the side and she sleeps so much better now.
Ah don't let the HV make you feel guilty. Mine said the same about dropping it and that 'my breasts are enough', but the formula bottle works for us at night so I'm going to stick to it until I think she wants to drop it.

@purplefig thank you so much lovely 💕
I hope you're doing okay. You know what's right for your baby and as you said M did amazingly with the baby rice. I understanding wanting a break for your mental health though, looking after yourself is the most important thing. You're doing a brilliant job! Enjoy your break and all the moments with M xx

@LikeTheFruit cant believe Esme is 12 weeks! That must feel like it's flown by. That's great about the Snuzpod nap, hopefully they'll start getting longer soon. What sling did you use? I'm debating getting one as when Alayna has her days that she doesn't want to be put down, I feel like I can't get anything done!

@MrsEG that's exactly what we went through! Lactation consultant picked it up just before we were discharged, but said she had a strong suck and a good latch, so it shouldn't affect her. I wish they had just dealt with it her - I had some really low moments with breastfeeding because of it and kept blaming myself. So glad it's sorted now.
Ah thank you so much, we had the name picked out really early on - it was one we both fell in love with instantly 😊
Glad the boys slept better! That's exactly what my day was like yesterday!
Look at the gorgeous boys 😍 they look like they're doing brilliantly! Well done mama!!

@TrashKitten10 sorry Daisy's sleep regression has hit so hard! I hope the night sleep gets better soon.

@ELW85 I hope Finn had a better nights sleep?
That's brilliant that he managed 40 minutes in the cot. Well done you and Finn!

@stormtrooperjulian Alayna was an overtired mess all day yesterday and she refused all of her naps and was so irritable by the end. She slept well at night though. I hope Dex goes down better today?

@Fivebyfive2 happy 6 months to Joe!
That's brilliant that he took the pureed veg so well. You do what works for you (and clearly it's gone off to a good start!). I hope breakfast goes well this morning :)

The weaning talk is so exciting! I'm following a few weaning Instagram accounts and seeing their stories and recipe posts gets me excited for when it's Alayna's turn (even though we've got a few months to go! 😂).

So Alayna had a terrible day nap wise yesterday. She was yawning and rubbing her eyes constantly but every time she was close to falling asleep, she'd wake herself up. She was very talkative throughout the day which I loved, but was an overtired mess by the time it came to her bedtime, bless her. I think she just constantly wants to be social, so fights her naps! Slept well at night thankfully, otherwise I would be a zombie today. I got myself a Magnum ice cream for getting through the day and put myself to bed pretty soon after she went down.
Those that used sleep training books - which ones did you get? I was going to wait a few weeks but I can't keep having days like yesterday, especially alone so might start sooner! I'm thinking of reading up on the EASY and Shh/Pat method.

DH working long shifts this weekend, so just the two of us, although may have a socially distanced meet at my parents to keep my sanity in check. Just hope today goes better!

Have a lovely day all x

@LokiCat we're in Scotland and got a stretchy sling free in the baby box. We've also got a baby Bjorn one carrier which is great. I keep getting ads on Facebook/instagram for stretchy sling called free rider I think which look similar.
I've just this last week started with more formalised naps. I used huckleberry app so guide times a little. And trying to do EASY (except for last feed of day where I feed to sleep). I've just been getting her into her sleeping bag, closi the shutters so it's quite dark and putting white noise on. First few times she was whiny so I placed hand firmly on her chest and waited til she fell asleep. However, this morning I put her in sleeping back, lights off, noise on and she was
asleep. No patting/shhh-ing required. She will only sleep for one sleep cycle though so about 45 mins.

@ELW85 fab news on nursery cot nap. What did you do?

@Fivebyfive2 Love that thread - I made a hideous mistake at work once; I work in events and managed to note the time of our conference slot wrong in the initial meeting. Worked on it for 3 months and never realised; printed all materials, sent all invites out etc with the wrong time on. Only realised when I arrived onsite. These experiences make us stronger haha!
Sorry you had a bad night! I’ve got everything crossed the nursery move will help you!

@stormtrooperjulian Oh Dex! It’s just cruel that there are so many sleep regressions!!

@LokiCat I agree - it was such a quick procedure to correct it too that I just couldn’t fathom why they don’t just do it when they see it; I’ve heard so many stories similar to ours now!! Ooh what weaning accounts do you follow? I like SR nutrition!
For sleep we used the Charmian Mead 7-7 sleeping routine book, it’s super similar to the EASY method but just gave a lot of tips with sleep and naps too. You can just take from it what you need and what works for you! I found it amazing and until this stupid sleep regression kicked in (😫) they were both sleeping through the night regularly!

I’m a bit broken today ladies! I think the last two weeks were just easing me in and the sleep regression has hit in a major way the last few days and nights. The worst thing about it is that it’s really highlighting the differences between the two of them and they’re so often buggering up each other’s naps. I was up so much last night with them, even Conor who has been okay up until now at night. It’s one of those where if I’m being rational I know it’s a phase I just need to ride out, but as it’s happening I just cry to DH like ‘I can’t do thissss!’ Conor woke 30 mins in to his morning nap just now (DH is up with him, I’ve just had enough!) but Ruairí is still asleep. Like, what do you do?! Their days are just all over the place because of it. I just can’t wait for some normality again!!

Afternoon all!

Little Finn pop did a wonderful 7 hour stretch last night, so I’m chipper today!
And he’s 11w today so here he is in his cute little dungarees!!

@purplefig - it won’t be the same without you, but totally understand! Take care of yourself and never forget you’re doing an incredible job with M and know her better than anyone. I hope the weaning keeps going well - you’re an awesome mama!

@MrsEG - oh mate I’m so sorry you’re having a rough time of it. But it’s great that DH is on hand for the weekend! It IS just a phase but obviously acknowledging that isn’t really helping! I’m still clinging on to the: it’s one more day they’ll grow out of it!

@LikeTheFruit @LokiCat - I’ve read the Charmain Mead that MrsEG has, and bits of the Baby Whisperer...Solves Problems book. They’re both based around EASY and yesterday I got him down in the nursery using the pat shush PUPD method.
However, what I will say is that I’ve reflected on it and I’ve arrived at two conclusions; one; he’s only 11w today and still SO young. I actually felt guilt when he was in his nursery asleep. And two; It killed me to see him cry yesterday. I totally get that he’ll cry when he’s tired anyway and learns a new skill etc but I hated it.
So...today I tried again but I totally screwed up his awake window and as a result he was overtired and I ended up holding him (whilst shush/pat) to sleep.
He’s currently in my arms and adorable.
So I guess my conclusion is, I don’t know if I’M ready to commit to something like that. As stupid as it sounds.
I’ve found a 3 week plan that’s REALLY gentle so I’m not sure it’ll work but it basically works on getting them away from their current sleep crutches (like feeding) and gets them to sleep with sensory stuff instead. You actually build up to getting them to sleep in their own bed, that’s how gentle it is!
Again, I’m a bit sceptical but at the very least if it doesn’t work, I know that the PUPD pat/shush will work so I can revert to that if needed.
I’ve paid for the plan but will report back if it works.
Basically what I’m saying is, like everything else, sleep is such a personal choice and you have to do what’s right for you and your LO.
@LokiCat - she might be going through a leap? Sounds like Finn a few weeks ago!

@Fivebyfive2 - as you would say to me, don’t be so hard on yourself 😊 Joe is gorgeous and you’re doing a cracking job!! I’d take comfort from the solo nap, even if it was fleeting!

@LikeTheFruit @LokiCat I would totally agree with @ELW85 here - sleep train only when they and you are ready!! I started early, but only because I had twins. I was absolutely demented with lack of sleep and developed PND as a result of that and many things really. I so desperately needed routine (and sleep!) so I cracked on early. I still think if I’d only had one I’d have waited a bit. But the luxury of babies napping on Mum is one totally lost on me!
My main advice is just have a read over a few bits and pull out the parts you like and things you think will fit and work for you, that’s what we did. And then don’t despair at 4 months with the regression when it all goes to pot!!! Just make sure there’s wine and chocolate in, and buckle in!

@ELW85 7 hours!! Absolutely amazing. Go Finn!! I’m actually feeling a bit better now as after some real ninja twin skills I managed to get them both to have a 2-hour lunch nap, they haven’t done that in 2 weeks. If nothing else goes right today - that still happened haha!

@MrsEG - I’m sure he’ll have a bad night tonight to make up for it, haha!!
I’m so pleased you’re feeling better and they napped that long! How did you manage it?!

@ELW85 Honestly - I don’t know!! They went down at 12, Conor kicking and screaming! I tried so hard to settle him in the end I just had to put him to put Ruairí down, and by the time I’d done that he’d fussed himself to sleep. He woke up within 30 mins, literally JUST as my fork hit my plate! I just logged it upstairs, put a dummy in, patted his chest, shhhhhh.... and he slowly went back off. He’d woken Ruairí (ugh!!) so settled him in pretty much the same way. And then I didn’t hear a peep - I actually went up and woke them at 2 so that I didn’t derail the day too much! They’re now kicking away on the playmat!

Ahh I’m sure Finn will be great! When the boys started doing bigger stretches at that age it kinda quickly became fairly consistent! Still some bad nights but it got to the point where if they woke before 3 we were surprised!!

What a day! Saw dh's nan, Joe did a giant poo so changed him in the (parked!) car 😂 He's been attached to the boob all afternoon / evening and had a couple of mouthfuls of ready brek (sort of got the spoon in himself at one point!) We had a thunder storm, he was Not Impressed, bless him... All conked out in his snuzpod now... But for how long?!!

@MrsEG - that is some serious sleep ninja work there! Nice one! All quiet on the western front so far?

@Fivebyfive2 - ah come on Joe! If you can have boob all day, you can have some porridge 😂
How was the Nan trip other than eventful ? I love a good storm!
I think he’ll have a good night tonight. Just got a feeling!

Just because there’s been a load of weaning talk and I’m clueless, I started googling and found this. It’s just hilariously written and apologies in advance if I offend anyone. Certainly not the intention!!

theyruinyourlife.com/2018/03/01/oh-fuck-off-baby-led-weaning/

@lokicat good shout with the me time. DH is so supportive I'm so lucky to have him. How are you getting on? Glad you got the tongue tie sorted. I asked in the hospital do they not just check every baby for tongue tie and the midwife was like nopeeee. And that was that! Not sure why they don't. I'm not really sure how to spot the signs but as we've had such a terrible time with latching anyway I don't think il be going back to trying again. It's probably put me off for life with any future babies sadly.

@mrsh497 that's such a shame the HV put so much pressure on you about breastfeeding. I've had a mixed bag, but recently my midwife and HV were both very supportive and said I've done what I needed to do and he's gaining weight like a trooper so he's got more strength to get over the delivery. Made me feel happier for sure. I do still get the guilt for not breastfeeding though. I feel like I was super naive about the whole thing and thought it would just happen.

@purplefig thank you :) weaning is one of the things im really looking forward to! Can't wait to make a mess! Hope you're ok, it's nice to take a break and look after your mental health and we will still be here when you return :)

@ELW85 thank you, it's really nice to be back, if a little surreal that I'm a mother!

@mrseEG that's exactly it. I found it so hard being on the ward that long without my husband but coming home I really missed the support and just being on the ward. Hormones chucked on top of that I think it's taken me a good 9 days to feel like myself again! How bloody cute is that photo 😍

Sorry if I've missed anyone. It's really nice to be back into the realms of Mumsnet chats too!

Hey ladies hope your well. I'm so far behind again I can't read back enough to catch up. 😫😫

Had a bit of a sleep relapse with Freddie last week, 5am starts came back! Seems to have fazed back out now though fingers crossed. We are finding he is getting quite bad separation anxiety to me, but I read it's common around 7 months. I also can't do a thing about it with OH being back at work we are just stuck together, mainly indoors 24/7 so it's inevitable really.

I've got him on the waiting list (subject to a look round) to start nursery in September 😣. I go back to work in July but luckily MIL has summer holidays off so will be able to look after him when I go back to work.

I'm so grateful for him at the moment, well I am every day! But there is so much shit going on around us in the world at the min, his little face just brings me so much joy.

@Fivebyfive2 Oh Joe!! I had to do a 💩 bum change in the wild a few weeks ago when Ruairí decided to let rip in the park!! Ahh the joys of parenthood!

@ELW85 I LOLd so much at the sweet corn paragraph in that link!! I’m so sure I’ll do mostly baby led weaning but I’m starting to get used to the fact that anything you plan with babies never actually quite goes to plan!! Did I get a water birth? Not even close (thanks twins!) Am I still breastfeeding? Nope - didn’t even used my ridiculously expensive twin BF pillow!! So I’m kinda making a weaning plan but very aware it’ll probably go tits up and I’ll end up with a cupboard full of Ellas Kitchen pouches 🙈
How did Finn do last night?

@Lemonysherbet It’s so weird isn’t it! I just really missed being able to press a button like is this right? Am I doing this okay?? Hope you’re feeling a bit more yourself now!!

@thumper59 He is so gorgeous!! How old is he now? Ahh the nursery situ.. it’s hard isn't it, so many have been closed for ages and a lot near me are now only taking 50% of their children back!! I’m sure he’ll love it though, I’m really set on nursery after seeing how well my niece did at hers - literally within weeks her speech started coming on, she was making more attempts at walking (pulling up etc) all just because she was watching the other babies doing it and wanted to join in!!

The boys have slept throooouggh! I’m so so sure it was the excellent lunchtime nap that did it, they were on fine form all afternoon and had a wee catnap in the pram before bed. They were down at 7 and they’re still asleep, I’ve not heard a peep 😍 I cannot tell you how much I needed that sleep. I was such a grouch the last few days! Note to self - must not take it all out on DH!

I also went for my first post-partum run; only managed 2k but i was delighted with it!

Have a great Sunday everyone!

Morning! How are we all? 😊

@LikeTheFruit ah thanks, will check some of the stretchy slings out. Still debating whether to get one.
That's brilliant that she settled herself straight away in the morning, I hope the rest of the day went just as well?

@MrsEG I follow SR nutrition as well, she has some great tips but my favourite is What Mummy Makes. I like that she shows recipes that both adults and babies/kids can enjoy. Also that she shows her daughter actually enjoying the food on her stories, so it's not just some Instagram set up!
Thanks for the book rec, I'll check it out and maybe just research for now until she's a few weeks older.
Wooo go boys! That's great that they had a good day and night of sleeping. I hope it continues!
I've noticed that if Alayna has a bad day of sleeping, I'm in a very bad mood as well, I try not to take it out on DH but sometimes slip up 🙈
Also well done on the run!! That's amazing! I can't even imagine managing to exercise at the moment, but do need to start soon.

@ELW85 thanks for the honesty. I do keep debating whether to give her a few more weeks, as she is only 7 weeks. I initially wanted to wait till 12 weeks, but keep worrying she'll get used to nursing to sleep. I guess she's too young to pick up any crutches yet, so may stick to my original plan. Also with DH so busy at work right now, it may be better to wait till things calm down for him as well so we can both do this together.
I did some reading up on leaps and I think you may be right. She's absolutely fascinated by light at the moment, so it does sound like she may be going through one a bit earlier then suggested.
I hope the 3 week plan proves useful, definitely would woke to hear how you get on with it!
That blogpost is hilarious! I'm going to attempt BLW when it's our turn, but just to the point of getting her to try what we eat. I think I'll drive myself crazy if I tried to make everything from scratch!
7 hour stretch is amazing, go Finn! I hope last went just as well? Happy 11 weeks Finn, he looks adorable!!

@Fivebyfive2 ahh Joe, he had an eventful day. My friend warned me about car poo explosions she's had to deal with, so I'm just waiting for our first one 😂

@Lemonysherbet aww that's lovely. I've been saying to DH from the beginning that I definitely couldn't have gone through the first two weeks without him. We were in the hospital for 5 days as well and even though the midwives were amazing, I definitely missed his support there!
Things have improved a lot with the feeding, just sleeping now. I think I need to stop putting pressure on my self and just go with the flow for now as she's still young and seems to be doing well (lots of chatting and smiles from her, which are so adorable!). How are you getting on?
I found the tongue tie page on the NCT website most useful, but yeah don't stressful yourself about it if you're happy to continue with formula. He's gaining weight and doing well, which is all that matters. I'm sorry it's put you off for the future though, I definitely think it would be this tough as well!

@thumper59 ah that little face 🥰 he's gorgeous!
I'm sure Freddie will do great at nursery, but I can understand it must be hard. I can't even imagine what I'll be like when it's Alayna's turn.
I know what you mean about them bringing us joy. I could just sit and watch her smiling and giving me her gummy grins on the playmat all day. The little sounds she's making make me smile so much!

So Alayna had a slightly better day with naps yesterday. I read somewhere not to use the swaddle during the day, as it will confuse her about bedtime and feel stupid for adopting that because as soon as I swaddled her end fed her, she conked out! She still refuses to sleep after 4pm until it's her bedtime and just wants to be on the breast the whole time, which is getting difficult.
She slept from 8:30pm - 7:30 this morning but in 2 hour stretches. Not sure how to stretch those out.. everything I've read says to feed her more during the day, to stop her getting up for night feeds but I'm already feeding on demand so don't think there's much else I can do!

May start adopting a daily walk into our routine. Haven't attempted the pram without DH yet, so will see how it goes! Usually I just go for a quick wander in the garden with her from some fresh air but HV suggested a longer one around the streets if she's really not going down for a nap, so let's see!

Have a lovely Sunday!