Ttc first baby catch up with our babies!

[Fivebyfive2]

Just putting this on in case anyone wants to catch up? We're all at different stages, so might be able to help each other out?

@Delilah7 @RanchoRelaxo @MrsR16 @thumper59 @trashkitten10 @Bostonfern @crossfitgirl sorry I know I'm missing people, I'm blaming newborn brain!

I'll leave the link on the 'pregnancy' catching up thread xxx

I think I'm insane we have discussed having number 2! 😂

Hi ladies :) sorry I've been so AWOL and missed a lot of the thread. It took a while figuring things out with Alayna. I was having trouble with feeding and even though Alayna was gaining weight (which I think was due to the formula we were also giving), the problems all seemed to point to a tongue tie. I asked for a referral and had the appointment last Wednesday and I'm so glad I went with my gut, because the consultant mentioned it was quite tight! Feeding has been so much better since she's had the tongue tie divided, also in turn she's sleeping somewhat better at night (I guess because she's actually full now!). Naps are still an issue on some days, she didn't sleep between 10am and 10pm yesterday and wouldn't let me put her down! I was absolutely exhausted when she finally went to sleep.
DH went back to work after his two weeks paternity leave, plus with the protests happening in London, they've cancelled his days off (he's a 👮🏽‍♂️) so it's been a bit difficult doing this alone some days (also, I know he's really missing spending enough time with Alayna).
I had my last HV appointment this morning (video call) and she said Alayna was hitting all her developmental milestones and sounds like she's doing great - so that felt really good to hear!

I've missed so many babies arriving!

@Lemonysherbet congratulations!! Jack is so adorable 💕 I hope you're doing well and all went okay for you?

@Larrydavid congratulations! How have you been finding motherhood? Rory is gorgeous!

@MrsH497 I scrolled back to see a photo of Charlotte - how beautiful, congratulations!
I'm sorry to hear she's been suffering. I'm sorry I can't offer any advice but I hope things start getting better.

I haven't caught up on the rest of the thread, sorry, but I'll hopefully be more involved now (I see sleep has been a topic recently, which I can defo be involved in!).
I have loved every single photo you've all posted of your little bubbas. They're all so adorable, especially seeing the 'then and now' photos. I can't wait to see what Alayna will be like in 6 months (at the same time, I don't want her to grow up so fast! I can't believe she'll be 7 weeks tomorrow!).

Lots of waffle in this post; I hope you're all doing well? It's become so grey here. I miss the sun!

@MrsH497 - it’s awful but I’ll help as much as I can!
Do you have a sling? Keeping her upright as much as possible through the day will help and the closeness will comfort her.
If you go on gripe water, you can’t go on Gaviscon as they both have sodium so it’ll dehydrate her.
It sounds like she’s got a bit of both, reflux wise. Is she throwing up full feeds or just a bit of posseting? The posseting is totally normal (so is the silent reflux to an extent); they only class it as GERD if they’re not gaining weight, get pneumonia, or are so hysterical they can’t lie flat etc.
Unfortunately wind and reflux can both make them unsettled when flat so it’s hard to tell what’s causing the discomfort.
If you’ve got a strong let down, you could express and then wind her every 15ml or so?
It takes 2 weeks for all dairy to leave us, so if you’re trying that first you’d need to go cold turkey with it all now and see how she gets on?
You’ll need to avoid onions, chillies and anything spicy or acidic as babies struggle to digest that family of foods and it makes reflux worse.
I know how distressing it is; nobody (incl DH) would believe me until he saw Finn swallow the reflux then scream.

How is she doing sleep wise? Can’t tell you how much over tiredness can really exacerbate the situation!

@LokiCat - lovely to hear from you and that you’re doing well!
I hope DH stays safe, and well done for going with your instincts. So important!

@LokiCat my husband (and me) both cops as well i totally understand leave being cancelled. Is your DH Met?
Charlotte had a tight tongue tie as well and we had it divided really helped with the feeding. We still sometimes do a bottle at night.

@ELW85 she does get hysterical lying flat, sometimes it's full feeds other times it's cottage cheese looking sick but I can see her swallowing sick and she then looks so upset. She sounds a bit snuffly as well.
GP did mention eliminating those as well so I've been having really plain food since I spoke to them.

Sleep is a bit hit and miss at the moment. She refuses to go in the snuzpod but I think that's more she's still small and it's quite big so we put her in her bassinet in the snuzpod which she mostly does ok with. Had a couple of nights she hasn't gone down until 4am because of the wind and reflux. Last couple of days she's not napped again because of the wind and reflux.

I'll try expressing before a feed as I do wonder if my let down is too strong as she quite often gulps, coughs/sounds like she's choking. Gets hiccups daily as well.

Thank you for the advice xx

Thanks all.

We had a forcep birth in the end (I got to 9cm on my own on the antenatal ward following an induction on my due date due to his predicted big size) but then 6 hours later everything slowed down. I got taken for a c section but they managed to get him out with an episiotomy, a tear and some big old tongs!

He was yanked with some force and hated his head being touched for 2 days, has quite bad marks and lumps on his face from them. He also got an infection from delivery (they think) so we had a 5 night stay in hospital and he was on antibiotics.

Between it all we had trouble feeding as he couldn't have his head touched and he was super sleepy on the antibiotics. So we're currently formula, expressed and nipple shield feeding. Feel quite bad he's not on the breast but honestly he's the dreamiest little thing and sleeps and eats and poops and is so content 🥰 hope it lasts

I think my emotions have finally settled down too, I've found it hard to motivate myself some days but my husband has been incredible.

Very selfish post, all about me! Once I'm back in the land of the living I'll join in a bit more 😊

@MrsH497 - oh bless you that’s awful and sounds all too familiar. The nap/sleep stuff is a vicious circle as she’ll get upset she’s tired, cry, gulp in air and make the reflux worse, poor little one!
Are you ok? I know it’s exhausting.
Hopefully the diet change helps but if not, at least you’ll get Gaviscon to try. Dr Browns or MAM bottles are good if you go down that route.
I can’t think of anything else off the top of my head other than maybe colief drops. They break lactose down which can sometimes help xx

@lemonysherbet- wow you’ve been through the mill! Welcome again, nice to have you back with us!

@ELW85 good days and bad days honestly don't think me having an infection etc helped still quite tender on the wound but healing well. It's just as you say tiring and upsetting, I had awful guilt when I initially gave her formula but she needed feeding and my nipples were excruciating at that point. DH can bring her wind up really well she just won't do it for me! So I'm dreading him going back to work.

I'll get some of those drops and see if they help. Really trying to have a plain diet with no dairy but it's so hard! I know breastfeeding is best for her as well but it's exhausting when she feeds brings it up and needs more.

@Lemonysherbet don't feel bad about the feeding I've been there and still am to a certain extent. Baby needs to be fed and have a happy and well mummy. You've certainly been through it x

X

@MrsH497 - please don’t feel guilty about formula. I started off EBF but ended up in hospital with Finn as he lost nearly 10% body weight and wouldn’t wake up from a nap so got rushed in and admitted. It was awful. After that, I lost confidence in my ability to keep him alive quite frankly, so went to combo feeding. He’s thriving now and I feel so much more confident looking after him and knowing how much he’s had.
You need to do what’s right for you all. I 💯 agree that breast milk is important but at the end of the day, fed is best and don’t let yourself feel guilted into making a very stressful scenario manageable!

Thank you @ELW85 makes me feel better! You've not had it easy have you.

I've been so silly DH and I DTD the other day (just caught up in the moment and hadn't DTD since we got pregnant with Charlotte) almost 4 weeks post c section, bleeding had stopped. Since then it's been on and off again and I've been tender almost a bruised feeling around the wound which I'm pretty sure has always been there. I'm so stupid 😐

@ELW85 thanks lovely.
I didn't realise you ended up having to go A&E for Finn, that must have been quite scary! How are you all doing now?

@MrsH497 Yup DH is Met - I think I remember you saying you are as well?
We're doing a bottle at night as well. She's not drinking as much formula as she used fo, but we're still topping up if she's hungry. I felt quite guilty about it at first as well, but then thought making sure she's feeding well is more important.
Alayna never slept in the Snuzpod for the first few weeks as well (or anything flat tbh). Her startle reflex always woke her up. She sleeps a lot better since I've started swaddling her (I got the Velcro ones from amazon, because she always escaped out of the swaddle blanket!).

@Lemonysherbet oh wow you guys went through a lot! Glad to hear you're both doing well now.
My emotions felt all over the place for the first two weeks (I still have days here and there). Definitely get some 'me-time' in. When DH got home from work yesterday, I ran myself a bath and just relaxed a bit as my mood was a bit low. I felt a lot better afterwards.

@LokiCat yeah we are both Met, he's back to work next week. Not looking forward to that at all he's been home with us for 4 weeks.
Charlotte hates being swaddled but maybe she would do better in the snuzpod if she was swaddled. I might try it for naps and see how we go. She always escapes from swaddled blankets as well! I've got a gro bag but she kicked off about that as well 😂
It's so hard not feeling guilty with feeding. Our health visitor really put pressure on me to breastfeed and did the whole breast is best, told me every bottle I gave her would lessen my supply etc etc. Really dented my confidence.

@LokiCat - we’re doing great thanks! He appears to be growing out of it...famous last words 😂

@MrsH497 - don’t be so hard on yourself and don’t let the HV back you into a corner. Every family is different and I still have a decent supply even though AF just showed up! Do what’s best for all of you!!

@ELW85 oh gawwd I hadn't even thought about the registry offices closing! We got in the day before they did I think. Hopefully it won't be long until little man is a recognised citizen . How was last night and today?

@MrsH497 Sorry you're having such a time of it with the reflux, it sounds like such a horrible thing to go through. At least you've got some expert input from ELW85 which might help! When are you thinking of number two?! Immediately after birth I was like: hmmm one and done. But I've changed my tune already .

@LokiCat Gosh that sounds intense and you sound like you're doing wonderfully! So hard to be on your own so quickly too, you're doing amazingly woman

@Lemonysherbet Oh wow that sounds like a lot to go through but you sound like you're both absolutely thriving. Please don't worry about EBF, you're doing an incredible job.

Last night I just gave up fighting the four month regression and BF her whenever she woke up - which was actually way less than usual. Typical eh?! I've just been out and got some baby rice and some weaning spoons as she's officially four months now. Let's see how it goes! Hope you're all good x

@purplefig we think we'd like an 18 month or 2 year gap between them so would start "trying" again end of the year or early next year. Equally if it happened before we wouldn't mind.
Must say @ELW85 has been brilliant with tips and advice

@purplefig - last night wasn’t too bad but he did his classic shorter stints after a long sleep the night before! How are you feeling about weaning? I’d be so excited!

@MrsH497 - oh honestly it’s nothing, even if I can just give you some peace of mind that you’re not alone!

Re: second babies...I do think we’re going to go for it, but that was NOT our attitude a couple weeks ago so we’ll decide next year when Finn is one, I think!

@MrsH497, wooo go girl, get back on the horse 😀 And don't listen to the hv about top ups, use your common sense and you'll be fine, if you do want to continue to bf. I did top ups for 3 weeks, then we did bf in the day, formula 8pm till 1am and bf overnight. We got through a 2 week nursing strike at about 9 weeks where he had lots of bottles and I was so convinced we'd end up stopping bf altogether that I bought a perfect prep machine... But since about 13 weeks he has been almost ebf and he is 6 months tomorrow! Although reading your posts about reflux I totally get why you're considering swapping. It's whatever you feel comfortable with. Xx

Well what day ladies! Joe's been screaming, the cats been throwing up, I got soaked on our walk... Stick a fork in me I'm done 😂 But we had a nice tea, Joe is in bed (but for how long?!) and there's ice cream to be devoured 🍨😋

I'll try and catch up properly later,hope everyone is OK xxx

@Fivebyfive2 haha it was weird getting back on that horse!! I'd been so worried when I was pregnant we didn't at all!! But now it's started the bleeding again I feel like I was stupid and should've waited till 6 weeks.
Ooh ice cream!!!!! Can I join you!

@ELW85 honestly it really helped x

Oh my goodness this thread is flying today!
We’ve had a crap day, this regression is kicking my arse. It’s so heightened when you have two babies when neither are sleeping properly!! At one point today I just bundled them both in to the car for a drive so that they would finally sleeeeep. I am just exhausted. I am a shell! I can barely string a sentence together. What a delight I am here today!

@purplefig That’s great she didn’t wake as much! Oh wow how come you’re weaning at 4 months do you feel she’s ready? The boys are miles away haha! I’m stocking up so we’re all ready to go though. Our high chairs arrived today!

@MrsH497 my scar still feels sore sometimes now. Not noticeably but say if I’ve had a long walk or been up and down out of bed with the boys a lot. Have you looked in to scar massage? Make sure you’re being really gentle with the area until it’s totally totally healed, for me this was about 8-9 weeks when I felt it looked completely healed over.

@Fivebyfive2 Enjoy that ice cream!!

@ELW85 Someone asked me and DH if we’d ever try for another - I replied with ‘He's getting a vasectomy’! One big bonus of twins - all over and done with in one clean sweep!!

I’m trying to read the thread properly but my brain isn’t working! But saw something on swaddles - yes these were a godsend when the boys were newborn. We got the Gro versions I forget the actual name. They made such a difference to their sleep!

I’ll reply and catch up properly tomorrow I thought I had it in me but I don’t haha! Just waiting on Ruairí’s danger window recently he wakes between 8-10 and neeew settling
Ah I can’t even type I’m gonna go ladies chat tomorrow!!!!!

@MrsEG - I hope you have a great night - you deserve it! Be good boys and let mama sleep!
That is one of the many good things with twins- all out of the way! With my luck we’ll have twins next, haha!

@purplefig Sorry I just read that back and hope I don’t sound like an awful judgey mother with the weaning comment! I’m sure you know exactly what you’re doing end what’s right for M! I only asked as in my prep I had a good read of this and decided the boys are miles from ready haha! They’re slow learners for sure! www.madeformums.com/baby/is-it-safe-to-start-weaning-at-4-or-5-months/

@ELW85 Thanks love they’re asleep now so I’m just praying they’re shattered - I would be after the day they had haha! Oh man - anyone who had one and then two would have my utmost admiration- it’s currently my sisters biggest fear as she tries for number two now she knows they run in our genes!

@Fivebyfive2 I spoke to the health visitor about Daisy's constant puking and, as predicted, she wasn't overly worried as long as Daisy wasn't in pain or it was affecting her growth. She said to try reducing her milk now she's on two meals as she might just be overloading herself. I'm not sure it is that as it seems worst after her first morning bottle. Think I'll try going against advice and giving her solids first thing and then a bottle a little afterwards, see if I can fill her tummy up with something more substantial so the milk isn't sloshing about as much as she rolls around the carpet haha. So that's not particularly helpful for you with Joe 🤷🏻‍♀️ she did say if things don't improve to see the GP about maybe gaviscon. Maybe we are just destined to always be covered in baby sick 🤦🏻‍♀️ And in your case cat sick too 😂 sounds like the ice cream is very well deserved!

@MrsEG Oh god I'm so with you hating on the sleep regression. An early 8 month sleep regression is my only explanation as to why Daisy's sleep has utterly gone to shit. Thankfully she is going down and napping like a dream in the day but the night times are awful- I was up with her every 1.5/2 hours last night 😩 It really hits you when you've been used to a decent night's sleep.

Hi all!

Hope you're all well. Esme had 12 week imms on Tuesday - can't believe that's us nearly out of fourth trimester!! Think she was having a growth spurt over weekend as she was cranky+++ and sleeping was pretty bad. Managed to get her to nap in her snuzpod once a day for last few days which is great - only manages 45 mins though. I pop her in sling for lunchtime nap and she'll sleep for 2.5 hours.

@ELW85 our registry offices are still closed. We normally only get 3 weeks in Scotland to register births so will be mad registering her at more than 3 months old! Sounds like Finn is sleeping really well overnight! I honestly wouldn't worry about him sleeping on you for naps, he's still in 4th trimester and will sleep elsewhere when he's ready. I've just been trying cot for one nap a day, she has a long nap in sling when I can get both hands free.

@MrsH497 sorry to hear you're having trouble with reflux. Breastfed babies tend to have less reflux than FF babies so if you're feeding well then changing unlikely to help. It can take up to 6 weeks for you to eliminate the dairy. Also there can be cross reactivity with soya so make sure not replace milk with soya products. There's a cmpa group on Facebook with has lots of info and support. I'm on week 3 of dairy exclusion and not noticed much difference in symptoms (mega runny poos, congestion and dry skin). So hoping it's not that do I can eat cheese again 😂😂

@LokiCat glad you're sorted with tongue tie! Sounds like you're doing a great job. My DH has been working from home since birth so I've been lucky. We should all be so proud of ourselves doing it all with absolutely no outside help - it's unheard of!

Congratulations @Lemonysherbet and @Larrydavid !! Is there anyone left on old thread? I had forceps delivery too, rotational. I'm 12 weeks PP now and everything seems to be in order down there now 😂😂

@purplefig and @mrseg I am not looking forward to 4 month regression! I feel like we're having a 3 month one to prepare us though 😂

@Fivebyfive2 well who said lockdown didn't have to be eventful! Hope you have a more chilled day tomorrow

@MrsEG oh wow it sounds like you've had a day! I do feel for you having to deal with two of them during this stage, it's hard enough with the one. Re: weaning, I'm just introducing a bit of baby rice for the time being. But yes I decided to as she's jumped from just below the 50th percentile at birth to just over 75% since a few weeks later and she's stayed there ever since. She's also got a freakishly strong neck...the girl has been sat up in her jumperoo for weeks! So she's able to sit up in her high chair to eat no problem. And over the last week or so she's been grabbing everything and putting it in her mouth , so I thought I'd give it a whirl. She absolutely loved it (and made an absolute mess). I don't think we'll be doing it every day or anything, I just wanted to see how she went with it.

@MrsH497 oh wow that's so exciting! 1.5 / 2 year age gap seems to be really popular. I haven't really thought about an age gap yet, but you raise a good point that you'd have to start trying at the end of the year. It's the thought of pregnancy that puts me off and I had a pretty straightforward 'easy' pregnancy, but the third trimester still ground me down!

@ELW85 M is the same if it's any consolation - one longer stretch of sleep to start, and then more frequent wakings after that. I'm just trying her on the odd bit of baby rice for now, but yes I am so excited to wean her - mainly so she can try new flavours. I have an inkling she's going to be in her element!

@LikeTheFruit They do say the sleep regression can happen from 3 - 5 months, so you never know, she could be getting it out of the way nice and early for you! M was much the same with naps for ages, she'd only do short stints if she was by herself but could do 2.5 - 3 hours in the sling.