February 2019 babies - thread 1

[Celebelly]

Let's go ladies! Share your tales of cluster feeding, cracked nipples, poo explosions and sleep deprivation!

@powkin been thinking of you. Hope today went better for you.

@detachablehoof - I hope tonight goes better for you. It's so hard to know what do for the best sometimes.

I played half a game of netball tonight. I was crap and am super unfit, but I did it!! X

@detachablehoof oh that’s sweet. Today has been better thank you. All the messages on here really reassured me that I’m not completely crap, I can’t really express how grateful I am to everyone and how much it helped. I have help from the mental health team and can talk to them but having other mums telling me this stuff is so nice. It’s early days with my antenatal group and I don’t want to feel like the one who is always down or needs reassurance/support. I don’t have a lot of friends close by and am not that confident in making friends as I feel like I’m quite odd so not sure how much to say in WhatsApp group and in person yet...

The health visitor suggested asking for gaviscon in a few weeks if it her reflux hadn’t cleared up, so I ignored that and lied to the GP so they prescribed it. She’s just done a big vomit so not sure if it takes a while to kick in or if it’s not working! What we have changed is the teat size on her bottles, I bought a vari flow and that seems to have helped.

Husband let me sleep longer from 2.30 - 8.30 so I’m feeling a lot more rested, although today I seem to be have an upset stomach so perhaps I’m a bit under the weather too - my period has also made a return in some form or other so perhaps hormones have something to do with emotional and physical state! Have not missed my period symptoms AT ALL.

@Yakadee well done on the netball front! I've been wanting to go back but nervous that if I get going and dive for the ball my stitches will open lol. How many weeks pp are you?

We had such a good night last night but tonight she's being s little monster, been up 1hr15 already and she's still wide awake 🙈 oh and has vomited in my freshly washed hair ...

@powkin - glad you're feeling a bit better about everything, although rubbish you're not feeling great - I hope it passes soon too.

@1stTimeTina - I was only really going to watch but somehow ended up playing, I'm glad I did. Thankfully I'm GS so not too much court to cover however, we've moved to the top division since I stopped playing (not sure whether to take that personally? Ha!) and there's a reason it's the top one - jeez! I'm 8 weeks pp now and felt fine after.

Things are moving well with our house purchase so will be glad to get that over with. They're wanting us to be in by the end of April. Not sure what I was thinking deciding to move with a new baby!!!

Sick in freshly washed hair is awful, it's like they know! It's always the first casualty when my son has a bug!!! Xx

@powkin - glad you're feeling a bit better about everything, although rubbish you're not feeling great - I hope it passes soon too.

@1stTimeTina - I was only really going to watch but somehow ended up playing, I'm glad I did. Thankfully I'm GS so not too much court to cover however, we've moved to the top division since I stopped playing (not sure whether to take that personally? Ha!) and there's a reason it's the top one - jeez! I'm 8 weeks pp now and felt fine after.

Things are moving well with our house purchase so will be glad to get that over with. They're wanting us to be in by the end of April. Not sure what I was thinking deciding to move with a new baby!!!

Sick in freshly washed hair is awful, it's like they know! It's always the first casualty when my son has a bug!!! Xx

Aw @powkin glad you've had a better day. Pleased that you are able to get some reassurance from the group. I wish I'd had been on mumsnet when I had my first!

We've had two bad nights here. You know it's bad when your Fitbit thinks you started your day at 0151....... He sleeps beautifully until about 1 but then just can't settle him. He's got a combo of wind and a cold I think. Managed to finally get him down at 5 and DS1 cake barging in at 6....

Feeling a bit despondent as DS1 was reliably sleeping 10-6 by 9 weeks and I stupidly thought this one would follow the same pattern but I guess they are all different. I was obviously spoilt first time around!

@maxiflump1 we’ve been the same and I’ve not been feeling well so DH has been trying to let me sleep but now he’s exhausted. We have real trouble burping her, she clearly needs to but can’t and just makes constant noise and wriggles endlessly. She was up almost non stop from 3.30 to now. She had a few days not pooping much and had done three since last night now so don’t think that’s helped her be comfortable. I’ve taken her downstairs now and put her on my bbhugme pillow, she seems to much prefer soft things to hard mattresses but of course we are risking killing our child etc etc. She is also quiet as soon as you walk her around but can’t do that for hours and hours even with a sling. I just can’t believe how little sleep she wants at night some nights, she really fights it. Now she’ll be good as gold again today and sleep loads and then not sleep again tonight. DH is really blaming himself and feeling there is something really wrong with her but I’ll show him your message so hopefully he feels a bit better. He has a hair cut booked so can’t sleep in too much annoyingly but I’m hoping having that venting outlet and going for a nice outdoor swim whilst I look after her will at least refresh him mentally. He never naps during the day which is another big problem!

Annoyingly I couldn’t sleep much either, DH told me sleep in the spare room from 3.30 (after 2 hours of feeding and wriggling and not settling) and it took me about two hours to get to sleep. I find it so hard to drop off and my mind just whirrs round and round, I couldn’t even say what I was thinking now.

I really hope her digestive system start to catch up with her hunger soon. It’s so hard to find the balance of right amount of food and her inability to wind. She’s so hungry but so gassy too 🙄😫 ...

On a funnier note I was freaking out I had a new black raised mole I’d never seen on my thigh (my dad has almost died of skin cancer twice)... turns out it was chocolate. Phew! 😅

Bottle feeding mums can you share your rough schedules with me? In terms of frequency, timings and amounts.

After six weeks of trying to make breastfeeding work, I have realised that I am just too anxious about it after such a stressful experience with my first baby (weight loss, not latching, nipple shields, tongue tie etc) and REALLY need to see how much food my child is getting! I have been effectively housebound and scared to do anything in case he is hungry and needs to breastfeed. He never seems satisfied at the boob and has recently been fussing and point blank refusing. So it’s time to call it a day and give this child a happy confident parent instead of a stressed anxious one. I had hoped that by giving him a mixture of bottle and breast I could overcome the traumatic experience of last time. But it seems I’m still a bit bonkers from before so have to live with that!

So I am planning to continue to pump for him and hopefully give him two or three bottles of BM per day. I did this with my first for four months so would like to be able to do similar if possible.

I can’t remember for the life of me what we have and when. And as he will be having a mix of formula and BM I reckon feeds will be more frequent than the formula box says.

Also if anyone is feeding BM by bottle then what are your pumping schedules? I’ll probably do first thing in the morning, mid afternoon, last thing at night and one in the night. But may only manage three to be honest as I have my older child to think about.

Honestly why is breastfeeding so bloody difficult? This is my second experience of getting to six weeks and feeling like I’ve climbed a mountain with no end in sight!

@AmberRose17 - I didn't even try bf this time around because of with my first. I found it so hard and it made me miserable.

It depends however Emma eats usually every 3 hours or so during the day, 6oz bottles however she sometimes has a little less, not usually more. Then at night we tend to do, 10pm, 3:30am and then 6-7am ish, again 6oz bottles.

She's 8 weeks old now for info.

I think you just need to do the right thing for you and baby, I agree there's no point making yourself ill with it xx

I've been exclusively pumping for six weeks. We are gradually transitioning to breast at last, but when I was getting supply established I pumped every two hours during the day and every three overnight. Now I'm a little more lax, so anywhere from 3-4 hours during day and sometimes longer overnight (just pumping when I or baby wake up and my boobs feel like they need it!).

My Emma drinks about 140ml of BM a feed, sometimes more for first feed after a very long sleep, and I pump anywhere from 120-200ml depending on time of day and how long between pumps so I usually end up with a couple of bottles in fridge a day to cover any times between pumps when there's nothing fresh. We were topping up occasionally with formula but no longer need to.

Also if you get a handsfree pumping bra, you can combine pumping sessions with doing plenty of other stuff. I often bottle feed Emma while pumping her next meal!

Oh and in terms of feeding schedule, I just feed her whenever she is awake and giving feeding cues. Sometimes that can be hourly and sometimes she can go hours without (she slept a solid eight hours overnight last night for example but had an extended and mammoth feeding session before bed last night and again when she woke up). Sometimes it's like she's cluster feeding even with bottle as she will just take little and often over an hour or two, and other times she will happily guzzle the whole bottle in 15 mins.

I am mostly exclusively breast feeding expressed milk, however.. I do have some ready made formula in the cupboard - just in case! He probably has that 2/3 times a week maybe.

Otherwise, he tends to have 4oz every three hours. Sometimes the timings changes and he’ll fed mire often or go longer between feeds.. I follow his cue.
He’s was three weeks old on Sunday for reference.

My purr doesn’t make sense... I’m not breast feeding expressed milk.. that’d be tricky!! I’m bottle feeding expressed milk! 😂

Oh for fucks sake... my post doesn’t make sense.

I’m so tired... 😴

Haha @Notasgreenascabbagelooking I understood. Am so impressed with you ladies exclusively pumping. That takes some dedication. @celebelly is it the Evie pump you have? I’ve heard mixed reviews about it and they are so expensive! Currently renting a Medela Symphony but there is a definite appeal to hands free pumping. Especially as my baby refuses to be put down anywhere longer than about ten mins. I’ve mastered double pumping with him in a stretchy wrap though which definitely increases the amount of milk!

Thanks for your feeding schedules. I’m a bit tearful about stopping BF but I am so much happier giving my baby milk and seeing him drink it and be satisfied.

I do have the Evie but you can use a handsfree pumping bra with any pump - you can even just use an existing sports bra by cutting a couple of holes for the flanges and then sticking them through. It's a game changer! I wouldn't have continued pumping without it. I am renting the Symphony too but just bought the Spectra S1 which is just as effective for me so I'm going to return Symphony.

I use Evie during day sometimes when I want to be mobile around the house and then the Spectra when I can sit on sofa and overnight. Having hands free means I can just sit on Mumsnet while pumping too

I have this one: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Lonior-Hands-Breastpump-Breast-Pumping/dp/B01M6B5HOR/ref=mpssa111_sspa?keywords=pumping+bra&qid=1553687568&s=gateway&sr=8-1-spons&psc=1

Wow Celebelly you’re a pumping pro! Good luck getting her back on the boob

AmberRose17 you've done amazingly, 6 weeks of breast milk will have done your baby the world of good. Any time BF is brilliant, it's HARD!

I was talking to my mum who BF my sister exclusively until she was 1, and me until I was 5 months (I stopped gaining weight so she switched to bottles) and she reminded me that when we were babies (mid-late 80's), it was recommended to give baby rice at 3 months! And she assured me that we both wanted to be on the boob all the time too when we were in the house.

Everyone I speak to who BFs now is the same, and I've not found anyone whose baby went longer than 2 hourly feeds in the day in the house (and bearing in mind if a feed takes half an hour, that's only 1.5 hours!).

I am still BF at 4+3 weeks and proud of myself as I stopped at 4 weeks exactly with DS1, but he was mainly on formula by then (DS2 is still just having 2 bottles of formula a day, for bedtime and in the middle of the night - I BF all day). It's a difficult balance though as he cluster feeds all evening, literally, and DH (nor anyone else) doesn't get much of a look in holding him as he just cries, so I know for us it's not sustainable long term. I've made peace that I will stop when I want to, and will probably end up introducing a third bottle soon.

Until our routine went totally out of the window, my little girl was having about 7 bottles of 100-120ml per day. Feeds were at approx 09:00, 12:00, 15:00, 18:00, 21:00, 01:00, 05:00.

But now all of a sudden she's not really having more than about 70ml at a time and timings are all over the place.

Also, huge respect to anyone who has made BF work even just for the first few weeks. I couldn't face even trying. I had huge anxiety about not being able to see how much my baby was getting and hated the thought of her being 100% reliant on me for food. I occasionally feel a bit guilty for not even trying to do it, but formula was definitely the best choice for us. Being able to have daddy do some feeds has really helped. Baby seems to be thriving so I try not to feel too bad about it!

@powkin haha I regularily do the same freak out the baby has a mark...only to realise its a crumb. Mummy has to eat at some point! Usually one handed over a feeding baby.

We are still feeding every 2hrs at most. Apart from last night she went from 8:30 to 1ish then down again until 4:30 longest sleep has since she was born.mixed blessing though as my boobs where so engorged and huge sore and heavy. They leaked for 1st time ever woke up in a puddle. And I have generally been sore all day. Pumped, hand expressed and fed baby loads and still feel full.

How do people cope when baby sleeps through? Super paranoid about mastitis or blocked ducts.

As well as still waking up and just checking her and not being able to switch off at all.

Reflux is still bad. Starting to get me really down. Watching her cry in pain. As well as feeling house bound. As everytime shes put down just cries. Went to a baby group today she just cried and cried. Was on verge of tears myself. Everytime we go to something like this its 50% her feeding 50% me soothing her. Sounds daft but when just two of us out and about shes fine but hates groups. Unsure if its because we spent so long is hospital shes warey everyone new is a dr and going to do something to her. As well as it just being the 2 of us for first few weeks of life in a hospital room. Feel like its given her some kind anixity maybe?

I’m still exclusively BF with the occasional bottle of expressed. Don’t worry too much about babies sleeping through and missing a feed, generally it takes a few missed feeds to cause an issue i think. DD is going anywhere between 1.5 to 4 hours between feeds it’s incredibly variable!

We’ve also had a LOT of fussiness esp overnight, unsure if wind or what. Hoping it doesn’t last longer than a few days! While I love the fact she’ll take a bottle I personally find BF easier - we’re well established now, I don’t envisage stopping before she’s 1. But it has to be the right thing for you.

@notquiteagandt I doubt she’s picking up on anything it’s just luck of the draw. Newborns are fickle creatures! DD normally passes out and is content as anything inthe sling except the one day I wanted to shop! Don’t lose confidence though - I’m impressed you’re going, I’m terrible at going to baby groups!