March 2007 - All present and correct now

[LunarSea]

Morning all - new thread as the old one's about to hit the 1000 posts limit.

Not so great this morning - feel like an egg-bound chicken IYSWIM. Grrr - especially as I managed to avoid it all the way through pregnancy. And not sure if there's anything I can take for it while I'm feeding?

Kitty - not bathing since Saturday eh? Watch it, the sosh'll come round!

Callie... sleep! Sod the house. I am trying to get myself into a vague sort of routine, of sleeping when Bertie has a long nap, and catching up with house stuff when he has a shorter one. I'm trying to prepare myself for dh going back to work atm.

Laidback what a good idea about visitors, I might try that with mil when dh is back in work, going over to hers instead of her coming here!

Piffle, just a thought, is there any way you could get someone to look after your three and you can get a couple hours sleep? If you feel loads better after the sleep it may just be lack of it that's making you depressed, if not it may be worth keeping more of an eye on it?

I only say that because I know that unless I get a bit of a nap mid day, things start to go a bit grey around me and I lose my sense of humour, but once I've napped even if it's just half an hour I feel well better.

Eids, was it you who, ages ago, posted a link to something, it was like a little positioning device so you could use to put lo in the middle of the bed so three people could share a bed? I couldn't find it and there are millions of posts to go through from the antenatal days, but I do think it was you, do you remember?

Edinburgh test, that must be what the hv meant she would do at six weeks or so.

Dolly... never mind leg shaving, my worry is that I'm going to grow a tropical rainforest instead of a ladygarden... lack of time and also stitches down there... how long before I can get the immac out?

I will probably be on here a bit less the next week, trying to get acclimitised to dh being back at work and the like, so if I only post brief messages I'm not ignoring you all, I will read everything I promise!!

Lasses like kitty and viva put me to shame
Mossie my ds1 is at school all day and being 13 is able to help and watch dd (4) if I need a break.
Plus dd will have a sleep if I make her in the afternon up to 2 hrs
This afternoon I made her and Finn has slept most of the afternoon too, So have I.

See my kids are dreams honestly, that's why feeling useless makes me feel well useless, my children are so good already
Better we'll see
Must go and wake him now or he'll never sleep tonight...
What's for dinner FGS I'd have a take away but I'd have to pay for it in 10p pieces

Piffle - at the risk of sounding like your Mum, please make sure you eat properley, otherwise you'll end up feeling even worse. Not eating properly can make you feel down in itself. If you're BFing its an excuse to indulge a bit. Poor you re. losing your purse - that's all you need at this time eh?

Kitty - I realised about two days ago that DCs hadn't had a bath for over a week - well they'd had a "bum bath" as we call them, but not washed their hair and were looking well grungy!!!

Other people spend as fortune trying to look as grungy as my kids!

Anyway Monti at least gets a daily bath now, to ensure his tum button is clean.

DH used some sceneted wipes last night aND mONTI'S BUM IS RAW NOW - HE CRIES EACH TIME i CAHNGE HIM WHICH IS REALY UPSETTING (SPECIALLY FOR HIM) - sorry didn;t mean to shout

Yes indeed, eating. ASDA do some outrageous 'cookies' the size of my baby's face and they've got no calories in whatsoever .

Foxy at least yours were washed a bit

Yeah the bit which counts!

Piffle I'm sure the takeaway people would be well made up if you paid in ten pences. They're probably desperate for the change. Go on, chips & gravy, chinese, whatever's your poison! You can make up for the empty calories tomorrow by stuffing your face full of salad leaves or something? Anyway {{{{hugs}}}} to you, Finn and your family and I hope you feel better soon.

back soon baby crying

Well, baby's down early tonight. I bought some of that COLIEF today and I don't know whether it's pure coincidence but Ronnie's been more settled. He's screamed and griped but not ALL the time so I feel slightly less frantic and on edge.

piffle-i have to say,when i had ds2 i found it a shock to the system going from having 2 kids at school,who were long out of nappies,could tell me if they felt unwell,and could bath themselves,to having a helpless newborn again.plus nobody told me how to do anything cos they assumed i must already know,even though i'd totally forgotten.

kitty-i dont know whats worse,not bathing your children for days,or obsessivley bathing them every night whilst muttering to oneself 'must appear to be a good mummy,even if they are being damaged emotionally through being ignored,at least they look like i can cope with them'

mossy-i must ask,is it a 'northern' thing to sit outside your house on the front street drinking alcopops or cans of lynx as soon as the sun comes out?or is it just in this strange town?

my mother always said it was 'common' to drink in the street

Diva
We have a bench outside the front of our house, most of the neighbours do too, when it gets sunny in the evening we sit out and drink cans and have a get together

Yes it's a Northern thing perhaps!!

i think my mum is a bit snobby for somebody who grew up in a council house in east london.anyway,most people have gardens down south.i suppose sitting on the front street is more interesting than sitting in a back yard staring at a brick wall.

im a bitwhen they are out there at 3pm with their lo's sitting in pushchairs though.i think thats a chav thing.

Well the little guy is developing a routine and I'm not sure I like it
I'm not a routing person ie: an enforcer - I like to demand feed (within reason) and let them sleep when they are tired, happy to let him have a wee moan as he nods off in his bed etc
Right so here is my last 24 hrs...
8.40pm finally falls asleep
11pm good 18 minute feed change - settles straight away
2.30am short feed settles straight away
4am - huge feed settles fast
6.00am another huge 2 boob feast and hey we're awake for the day.
8am conks out in bouncy chair
8.30am I give him quick 10 min top up as we are taking dd to pre school
8.45 leave = screams
9.30am back home - stops screaming
Feeds again, plays, etc happy little fellow
11.30 good long feed
Asleep deeply, we go to pick up dd he does not wake, pop him to bed when home no waking.
2pm wakes for feed - bang asleep again (I go to bed with dd too)
4.30 awake - hungry we feed on and off for noext 4 hrs interspersed with screaming, nodding off when held waking up when laid down
Culminates in huge vomit at 8.30 and finally, he sleeps.

Thank god for my 1 yr old ds who has bathed fed and helped dd into bed.

Oh FFFFFFFFFFFFS he's awake again
GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

13 yr old ds
Am letting Finn have a yell - totally doing my head in
Am reheating my pasta for the 3rd effing time Arrghhh thank god Dp is home tomorrow

i just put Elsie upstairs,put the moses basket in the cot,have switched breathing/baby monitor on....am crapping myself now.the first night i put dd1 upstairs (rather than taking her up when i went to bed)she slept through the night(then slept through every night thereafter),but ds2 screamed when i did it with him.dd2 was ok,i think she took a few nights to settle but i persevered and she got used to being on her own.

i feel now that shes already growing up so fast,but i need to get her in a routine cos i need that couple of hours to myself in the evenings to keep me sane(ish)

went up to yelling Finn, one pat on the bum and he has gone off to sleep again
Babies huh, when will they come with a bloody manual...
Diva bless you

Diva, I know what you mean about the evenings, I'd die if I didn't get my hour. Bloody hour, that's all I get from when Ronnie settles 9pm to when I go to bed 10pm.

Piffle, Finn seems to be pretty 'well behaved' during the day.
Remember that 4pm is SO typically a time when they kick off. Ronnie is EXACTLY the same if it's any consolation at all, but he usually kicks off from about 2pm until 8-9pm.
But it does REALLY do your head in doesn't it.
I honestly think the COLIEF has helped. Still we'll see what happens over the next few days.
I sleep with Ronnie and so start settling him down on my bed from 8 ish. I know when he does fall asleep feeding on the bed then he's down for a couple of hours or so.

I like the idea of drinking on a bench. We've got a bench and I like to drink sitting on that when the evenings are nice and warm

Kitty has is also good at night inasmuch as he resettles so well which I am eternally grateful for.
I guess when you've got other kids 4-7 is a bloody awful time
Anyway I've ordered a new sling a Kari me which means he can just be stuck to me, maybe canfeed in it too. And not stress about it.
2 cans of ale tonight have mellowed my perspective.
I really feel for my dd, she has had so much attention (very very mild SN which she is outgrowing now) and she is such an angelic child, truly truly she is v special and she is getting short wedge of the cake and I feel so guilty
Ahh guilt, the true qualification for being a mother

Ah Piffle, the guilt is truly crushing. I feel like such a crap mother. Especially with dd3 who is such a lovely, gentle child. I could weep for her, actually I DO weep for her.
I weep for the fact that she is no longer the baby and that she has to share me with such a screamer.
I think if she became angry or aggressive towards him it would be easier but she is so loving and gentle with the baby and such a happy girl that I feel so guilty.

Now I know what I have just written sounds insane, but she is my baby still and I love her so dearly. Then I feel guilty that I am so horrible to the other kids and don't have any time for them.
So yes there you go, guilt and motherhood go hand in hand.

When a new baby comes along I think of it like us all sitting on the long seat of an old bus. We have all got our places and spaces and are quite happy, then we ll have to budge up a bit to make room for the new one. The is alot of grumbling, arguing and complaining, but in the end we all get used to our new places and settle down again. Silly I guess.

Glad you're feeling a bit more mellow

mossie - was this it??

here

kitty dd sounds exactly like yours, kind gentle soft and loving, no hint of jealousy, she even holds my boob when I feed him as she wants to help feed him, she is just such an angel and thinking about her does bring tears to my eyes.
I'm off to bed now Finn just woke for a feed and has done a poo so am going to go change him get him another boob and pray he let me sleep at least 3 hrs
.

can't imagine managing with another baby right now.. v impressed with anyone who does tbh.

lol at visiting other peoples houses so you can go. I say (or dh says)oh, I have to feed him now, do you mind, sorry! and we look at them expectantly. my friend is v brave. she just says can you go now, I have to do things.

did the hv test for pnd this week, but its just snapshot- the washing machine died tonight FULL of all the baby clothes- yeah i know, laundry rages out of control dh had to mend it, ## cried when he opened the cupboard under the sink and everything fell out " what is all this mess?" feel like hormonal teenager sometimes.

Hi all, I have sneaked online while everyone is in bed. PCs are in guest room occupied by MIL but I am on the laptop in the kitchen. Laptop has to be hidden from her otherwise she will be online 24/7!

Piffle - Sorry you are finding it rough. I find getting out helps. Saturday I just went to the High St for an hour on my own which helped.
Make sure you stop and eat and drink, you will feel much better. It won't kill the baby to cry for 5 mins while you have a cuppa - just shut the doors so it's not so loud (that's what I am doing)
BTW your routine is looking v similar to mine, DD is also guaranteed to scream between 5-8pm when i am attmepting dinner/bath etc for the 2 year old

Fox- do you think the Nystan is better than the Daktarin? I now seem to have one almost pain free nip but the other is hellish

Right I better go... need another cuppa before the work of the day starts

Eids yes that is it brilliant! Dh and I want to co-sleep with him even when we are sharing a bed, but dh is petrified of rolling onto him.

Last night Bertie did not sleep so well... was awake from about four until about eleven! Or so it felt, anyway. I had him in with me from about ten til eleven and he slept then. But second time round (he woke at two and fed and then wouldn't go back to sleep), he didn't seem to want to be in with me and would only sleep in his basket! What's going on? While he's feeding he seems to drift off.. the second I put him down he's wide awake again! Strange. I can't master the feeding lying down thing yet so I don't think it helps that I have to pick him up to latch him on and then put him down again, it is being put down he hates.

Dh actually said something quite helpful! He said that babies are basically tiny animals and that all tiny animals of whatever species have to sleep eventually and have to have quite a lot of sleep.

Piffle I hope you manage to get some down time today for yourself and you start to feel better, or get some help that makes you feel better.

Those of you with more than one I have no idea how you do it, full of admiration!

Off to wash and the like now!

Was there any response from Booboo?

Well I don't feel too guilty, the kids are such great company for each other and my 2 younger sisters are the best things that ever happened to me so it is so worth the initial disruption.

Spongecake/Mossy when you have the next baby you won't have to adjust to becoming parents, you've already done that. I do often feel that I could do with another couple of arms on my body though And respect to you guys with another little one, my ds2 is over 2 which isn't too bad.

Mossie - I'm actually finding it easier with 2 than I did with just ds1 whaen he was Toby's age. I think it's just that you've done it once before and know that you've survived it, learnt not to believe all the "advice" you're given, and know that everything is only a phase and there's light at the end of the tunnel - so you can be a lot more relaxed about it. And you've already learnt all the little time saving tricks like feeding lying down, baths every day aren't necessary, nappies are absorbent enough to not need changing the moment they're wet, etc.

Our "routine" - or more accurately Toby's natural pattern which he seems to be quite consistent about is roughly
6am - wake up, big feed, stay awake until about 8.30
8.20 quick top up feed before school run
8.30-10 sleep in pram (I just leave him in it when we get back)
10 another feed.
10.30 back to sleep.
12.15 wake up, big feed again, awake until about 2.30
2.30 feed again, then sleep
4.00 wake up - alert until about 11pm, interspersed with occasional 15 minute catnaps, and lots of feeding.
11 pm sleep
3.30 15 minute slurp - lying down, half asleep!

Written down it sounds like an awful lot of feeding - probably 12 times a day if you count all the seperate bits of the evening
cluster feeding. It's only a problem in the evening though - have discovered that I need to express so dh can feed him in order to get enough time to myself for a bath! I'm going out for a meal with some other mumsnetters tonight, so just have to hope that I've got enough milk stored for him to get through the evening! I don't suppose a little bit of formula will hurt him as a one off if not - and I should have plenty of milk for him to have a nice big feed when I get back!

Diva/Kitty - I feel like that too about my DD who is nearly four - I just feel so guilty I'm pushing her away from me and spending so much time with Monti. She's gentle with him but also very emotional atm as she knows she's no longer the baby and she keeps asking for a "girl baby" as she wants sister

Rosy - I texted Boo on Monday but no reply yet. I hope she's OK and just busy - feel slightly concerend for her and Johnny as she's usually on MN....

Piffle/Mossie/Kitty/Diva - Monti is very unsettled each evening so I feed him, stick a dummy in his mouth and sit him with the DCs which distracts him. When he gets bored with that Dh walks the floor with him for about and hour while I get DCs ready for bed. I don't get any me time but will hide in the bedroom with him, me lying on bed and watching soaps, him chomping on his dummy.

He snuggled up really close to me last night so I woke in the feotus position with me all curled around him. He looked so cute.

Don't they look cute when they're asleep!

TheBlonde - Nystatin oral tablets do work IME but take at least 7 days for the pain to go...Nystatin worked better than fluconozale actually but the pain went quicker with fluconazole IFKWIM....I don't know if Daktarin works on its own as I've always had oral tablets as well but others say it does.

have you got the Nystatin tablets for you? what are you putting in LOs mouth, is it Nystatin or Daktarin orabge gel?

glad to hear that at least one nip is getting better - that happend to me to!