May 2017 #16 Sleep deprivation, mumnesia and first smiles

[crazyzooo]

New thread to celebrate the small things (like first smiles and eating steak with one hand), commiserate over the less fabulous stuff (poonamies, vomit eruptions and wind spring to mind) and someone to talk to at 4am

Thanks for all the support ladies!
@ClaireSunflower please hang in there x I'll message you when Spekkie is asleep xxx

That's a really good idea @mightymouse76 where did you find your babysitter?

@ClaireSunflower maybe book a GP appointment too? Just to check in if nothing else. I don't know where you are but here we have something called Crossreach which is a charity that provides the sort of support you sound like you need. There will be something local to you.

@mightymouse76 if I didn't have family support I would do what you've done. Even an hour off feels like a holiday sometimes.
Yesterday and today I've been at my parents as we've had workmen in and I've been fed, sent for naps, they've taken BabyTea out in the buggy and I felt so rejuvenated for it. There can't be many mums who can do everything and be on top form 100% of the time.

First immunisations done. BabyTea rather enjoyed the calpol! Rotavirus syrup was also sugary which he seemed to like too. Three jabs though and he screamed loads bless him. Two lots more of calpol today and hope there's no fever or reaction.

Thanks for all the responses a few pages back about cord stump.
3 weeks old today and its still on,it seems a bit crusty around the base and I can see yellowy/brown marks on the clothes he is wearing that cover that area. It doesn't smell funky though. Seeing midwife again tomorrow morning so not too worried.

Re breastfeeding and alcohol, I read on the LL website that your milk alcohol level is the same as your blood alcohol level. I have had 2 glasses of wine so far,both times whilst I am feeding him or straight after. Not worried at all.

@BouncingBlueberry that's how we discovered it too, makes a huge difference to the amount of sleep we get, I still have the next 2 me which she goes in sometimes then ends up in the bed later. The link @teainbed posted is good information. I also found that I wake up before she does so the 2 am feed she's not really awake for so we both settle back to sleep again really quickly.

@Rustler74 sounds like you're doing everything right for your OH 13 years sober is impressive so he's doing well. @savagehk idea of a trade off night sounds like a good one. My DH has a history of MH issues and has had cbt in the past, he was struggling a couple of weeks (I think) ago because he was trying to do everything himself to look after us, rather than us tackling things together like we usually do. But we both recognised it and now we're a better team.

@ClaireSunflower that's rubbish from your HV particularly when you've had a hard time already. I did find that the ability to pass/remember information between HVs and midwives was a bit hit and miss , I've told my HV at least 3 times that I had a csection but she remembers every time to ask about our house hunting. Is your HV part of a team? I have a phone number which gets me in contact with the team, I think they each do a day in the office. That way you may get to speak to someone else.

@RasperryInAMelon sorry you're having a hard time but the fact you recognise is half the battle. I'd also say write your birth story, it really helped me to process what happened, even if you don't share it with anyone I think you will find the process helpful.

@mightymouse76 what a good idea getting a sitter, spark of genius!! I don't know how we'd have coped without being at my parents. Well I do, I would be knackered, never washed and we'd be living on take away/ready meals and I think the dogs may have left home!

I have a saying I found somewhere that's really been useful to me recently.... you don't have to see the whole staircase you only have to take the first step. It's amazing how quickly you get up the stairs if you only focus on one step at a time!

In non baby related news, we had our offer accepted on a house yesterday 😁😁 so next step finalise mortgage application... we could have our own home again by mid August!!

@Rabbitykins55 I found her through sitters, and she's fab. We did a 4 hour test booking one afternoon, and lucky for us our first sitter was a keeper (so far)- a grandmother and mother of 4 (including twins). Baby is super calm with her and she showed us how to bath him, different winding positions, and has offered to show us how to do an African sling wrap.

@teainbed It's crazy isn't it- this weird notion that we should be able to do this alone. I live in a very multicultural area and have been reminded regularly that in many other cultures we would have been looked after by female family or community members before and after birth, in exactly the way you describe, so mothers well being is treated on a level with baby. We've really lost that here and it contributes to a loss of self worth when the misplaced guilt kicks in. This is what I'm trying to remind myself of daily...

@crazyzooo I love that cartoon !

@raspberryinamelon, @sipperskipper and everyone else struggling, I am starting a local CBT 'enjoy your baby' group next week, I was referred late in pregnancy as I am slightly high risk for PND from my history and then I had a kind of traumatic birth so I'm going to make myself go. I'm writing it down here because then I'll feel accountable and hopefully actually go!

@mightymouse76 that is genius! I never thought babysitters could do newborns, I thought it would have to be just us til he was older. If you are in London please DM me her details but otherwise I shall look online.

@1004Rise that's what we're like on the days we don't have her (like today!!). I've had no more than 4 hours sleep, up really since about 3am as Baby is cranky and upset as hell with terrible wind and possible reflux, I'm still in milk stained pyjamas, seriously need a shower and just managed to stuff down a microwave mac'n'cheese
I miss my sitter today!!!

@CoxsOrangePippin I am, will do!

I have got to have a shower first thing - I wake up so sweaty and milky. Just stick baby in the carrycot in the bathroom. She gets a bit fed up for the last minute but I'm quick! Food is made with her in the sling.

@FoxMulder same, in the bouncy chair with the light show and music from the baby monitor! Usually can get a quick rinse that way.

Aw, sorry to those who are finding it hard. I felt like this first time round- I promise it gets better, and quite quickly!
Baby sonnet now on ranitidine for reflux- gp didn't mention if I should stop the infant gaviscon or not? Any thoughts from anyone?

Haha fox- what is a nap?! I'm the same as you- I have a toddler who has been running a fever for three days...not fun!!

@crazyzooo that cartoon has properly made my day 😂😭😱😂

OH is hoovering and this is how Jacob responds.

I so wish I had core muscles in the right place for a sling, although I think given the gap between my abs even without a c-section I would have struggled!!

Had the health visitor this morning, she's now 11lb 3oz so doing well. HV said no need for an appointment next week (we don't have clinics, all home visits - don't think they have anywhere to hold them) since we're both ok and to phone if we need anything so she'll be back week after next to do 6 week check and my pnd questionnaire 😊

Question of the day, baby rise has bouts of dry skin on her face, I haven't been putting anything on because I was worried she'd react to it - she came out in a rash when I wore a new top that I hadn't washed 😱 HV didn't seem concerned either but now second guessing myself 🙄 should I do anything?

1004 have you been to a sling meet? I'm sure my core is rubbish again but with her being so tiny at the moment both the wrap and connecta are pretty high up so the weight is on my shoulders etc rather than core.

Those of you that are breast and bottle feeding, what bottles are you using? I've got a couple of tommee tipper, mam and medela calma bottles and wondering which to try!

Mam! They're really good!

@1004Rise baby W has had lots of dry skin. We've occasionally been putting almond oil on her although I'm not certain it's made a huge difference.

Baby Red is now three weeks and doing well. However as I now have mastitis for the second time (caught it early first time) and have had to have blood tests and antibiotics - I am giving up with the expressing of breast milk. She won't latch no matter how much I have tried and the expressing is too demanding and clearly not working for me!

So she is on formula from now on and I will just keep expressing to avoid mastitis getting worse and gradually reduce the pumping.

Oh the bottles we use MAM, Medela Calma and Tommee Tippee Ultra - all seem pretty good

That sucks red. Mastisis is horrible. You've done amazingly expressing so much.

Hope there is no reaction to the jabs tea. They are so tiny for all those injections.

Rise I've been using coconut oil for dry skin. But it's really normal. So you don't need to do anything if you don't want.

Love that cartoon crazy. Very true.

It's so hot. 26 degrees in our room right now. Get so paranoid about the baby overheating when it's like this.

@red I had to express for every feed for the first 2 weeks or so and I found it really hard going - so well done for keeping it up.

Re dry skin we were told not to use any baby products on their skin until 6 weeks. I ignored that and have used some Burt's Bees oil.

At my wits end with nappy rash. Lots of very messy nappy off time over the last few days. Currently using water wipes - think I might have to try cotton wool and water. Have tried metanium which initially seemed to work, but still not cleared up. Several other creams tried too. Might try some of those organic nappies....any miracle cures out there?

rocky this is pretty amazing:
cavilon spray. I had it prescribed for dd1 when she was about 1 so you'd need to check with a doctor if you can use it for newborns.

If the rash is persisting despite nappy free time and barrier creams then worth getting it checked. It can sometimes be fungal.