February 2016 - our babies are here!

[IslaMann]

New group for those graduating the ante-natal thread

Hugs haquoi. I really feel for you, must be so hard. I agree with northern, it wasn't long ago at all really. The thing is as well, yes you have ds2 and have been enjoying him, but he isn't and never will be a replacement for your ds1 so you're still allowed to grieve and mourn for ds1. You mustn't feel like you have a baby now so must be happy all the time, you still suffered a huge loss not that long ago. And I don't think you ever get over that really, time can help to heal and make the loss feel less acute but it's not a case of just dusting yourself off after a set amount of time.

Handbag thanks, you reminded me to book our baby sensory classes Hope you enjoy them.

Liberty my first two, especially my second, were horrendous sleepers. Dd gradually got better all on her own but ds was a nightmare until he was 2 (still wakes early now). With dd2 now I've decided not to give a shit because it doesn't make any difference, if you have a non sleeper they're not going to sleep no matter what you do! I think she sleeps really well but other people are aghast that she's not sleeping through yet .

Thanks troika yeah I mainly try not to worry but feel like I'm teaching her bad habits by letting her sleep on me etc - but she's much happier in herself when I do so i should prob just give up and enjoy her

[Flowers] haq be kind to yourself. The others have written much more eloquently than I can, but I can't imagine how to cope with losing a much wanted child.

I don't think it's worth worrying about those rods unless they are a problem for us. I am sure that sleep is pot luck. Neither of mine will sleep on me and it's hard not to take that as a personal rejection even though it's a good thing.!

Hope you enjoyed your class handbag. We went to baby massage today and it was followed by a 2 hour nap. Result!

Thanks for all your lovely comments, they really are lovely and help. I managed to have a good day in the end - lots of walking, and got ds2 weighed (13+5, 18lb 5oz, over the 100th centile ), and then his latch checked as he's got lazy. Lots of family time as well. Plus bath time, skin to skin feeding and an explosive poo all over the (thankfully well-protected) bed It's been a good day.

liberty can you reset expectations to suit you, baby and no one else? I find every time I read a parenting book I panic because I'm "not doing it right"... When I don't read them and just do what I feel is best (obv I look up if I have questions or wishes) then i feel like a great mum and I think he benefits from that. Also, don't worry about the rod - things change so much that it might not be the same next week, let alone in 5 years. And what someone said to me recently is: it gets better. I hope it's sooner for you. You're doing an amazing job.

cud we did a baby massage taster yesterday and it was great! Was that your first session? I might try to find a class.

How did it go handbag?

haq wow that is an impressive weight! Go you....! Amazing boobie milk!
Thanks, yeah had a better day today just letting her nap on me when she wanted rather than trying to force her into a 1.5-2 hour nap schedule she doesn't want to follow! Will try and remain positive!

Baby massage is great, I've nearly finished a 5 week course with DD

Wowee haquoi, my dc were 18lb at a year!! That's amazing milk you have. Dd2 was still under 10lb last week...

Haquoi - Wow! What a thriving baby! DS is 12+3 and weighed 13lbs 1oz yesterday. He's put on a pound in the last 10 days and is growing fast, but clearly still smaller than yours!

Liberty - Agree with the others about managing your own expectations. Maybe look back at this thread to see some of your old posts where you were worried about things. You made it through those concerns and baby's happy and healthy. I think we can all get caught up on stuff that a few weeks later seems silly. Or maybe it's just me!

Baby sensory was good. There were 20 parents there, lots of babies older than DS but a couple of really little ones. Everyone apart from me seemed to be with friends - it was a taster session but some had clearly been last term and others had met at ante natal classes which we didn't do. Still, I enjoyed it enough to book us on the ten week course - sure I'll feel less awkward each week, and nice to spend some time with DS that's not purely functional! He slept very well yesterday afternoon...

As for today we're off to lunch in a bit with my boss and some colleagues. First time I'll see them since January although I've had emails back and forth. Going to show off DS and catch up on the gossip but I know I'll be asked about coming back to work, even just in a friendly way. I was so committed to my job before - it was a global role involving long hours and lots of international travel - and I can't quite reconcile my life last year with life this year. So I'm just putting off thinking about it!

And TMI, first proper period this week after a year without them. I'd forgotten how much I hate them! I'm on cerelle which with a bit of luck will stop them altogether (when I was on cerazette I didn't have a period for three years), but it takes a few months to control these things... Fingers crossed...

Thanks handbag yeah think I'm just a panicker!!

That class sounds great, maybe the others are just really good at small talk. I know I'm actually really shy but can talk about rubbish easily with others by putting shy-Ness out of my mind. Only started doing that when someone told me (once we were friends) that I came across really standoffish cos I didn't talk

Feeling sorry for myself today got really bad toothache (my wisdom tooth thinks it's a good time to start growing again) and back/foot/hand ache, full of cold and tired coz I haven't been sleeping properly from the pain. I've cancelled ds's injections today as he is a little sniffly too and not sure I could cope with the grumpiness while I feel so rough. I've booked him in for next week though so hopefully we will both be feeling lots better by then.

haq that's great weight gain, you must have super boobs! I meant to ask how your gig went?

handbag the class sounds great and you will soon have lots of new friends I'm sure.

Aww clumsy feel better soon

Sympathies clumsy, my wisdom teeth did the same recently. They're all 'partially errupted' to a greater or lesser degree, and so occasionally have growth spurts. Which fucking hurts.

Any sort of schedule is way off for us, especially as waking times can vary so much. But DD is now napping in her little vibro bouncer, and we got her down for an hour in her moses last night, so gently going in the right direction.
I really wouldn't bother that much, it's only as I'm going back to work in under four weeks so we've got to get DD used to sleeping without me, sigh....

Glad you had fun at baby sensory handbag i only feel I'm starting to get to know to new people at massage now and we're 5 weeks in so sure it will get easier soon. I definitely find it easier to go to activity type sessions as that means you don't have to do so much small talk!

Maternity leave goes far too fast doesn't it! I'm trying not to think about work!!! Am sure dd will sort herself out northern even if she does wait until you're not there...

Get well soon clumsy

Impressive weight haq

Been a funny old day here. Miserable weather and a tired toddler have been challenging. Particularly the tantrumming that started around 430. I gave up and had him in bed at 620!!! Sadly not sleepimg for some time after that so not sure he will be any better tomorrow. But at least it will be nursery dealing with it not me!

And babycud didn't nap!

Then the oven door shattered when I was heating it for some baking. Gave me a real fright. So glad it was after kids bedtime! I never bake but ds1 wanted to make bread this afternoon so had left it rising ready to cook later. Need to figure out what I can cook with no oven or grill until we can get it fixed... poor dh spent his evening clearing broken glass

God, how scary cud! When these things happen it's just a miracle no-one gets hurt. Guess you'll be having lots of pasta/rice and sauce meals...
We've had to manage without a kitchen in our first place, and an oven in our second, for months at a time, it's no joke!

We had a success last night, DD did the stretch in her moses in the living room, then had a big feed and slept through I can tell as my top was extremely damp this morning...and this morning she's nodded off- with encouragement from Ewen the Sheep and some extensive nose stroking- in her cot.
I can feel the 4 month regression just waiting round the corner to bite me in the arse!

Thanks everyone, feeling slightly more human today but still cancelled my dinner plans for tonight

cud how scary, glad no one was hurt.

liberty I saw this on my fb feed just from Jason manford and it made me think of you 'Those smug parents who (often without being asked) tell you that "my baby goes to bed at 7pm and sleeps through till 8" don't realise that the baby only does that because it's bored of your company; the first and last hour it's just pretending so it doesn't have to talk to you 😜'

I hope I haven't offended anyone just wanted to make Liberty smile, especially you northern that is some great sleeping! I'm keeping my fingers crossed that we will bypass the 4month sleep regression!

Had a look round dd's old nursery today so thinking we will send ds there even though it is slightly more out of the way than I would have liked. All of the staff are still the same 10 years later which is lovely. They asked about our routine hahaha I didn't think boob nap poo boob play boob boob boob boob play nap would cut it as a routine

Ha thanks clumsy

Thanks guys! I think the worst thing yesterday was thinking of how awful it would have been if the kids were in the kitchen a d got hurt. V grateful that no real damage done and we just need to sort a replacement. Good thinking on the pasta and rice meals northern. Just need to get brain in gear for fussy toddler!

Good sleeping babychinchilla and glad your feeling better clumsy that sleep quote made me hang in there liberty

Nice day for us today, 2 friends over for lunch with their babies. Lovely to catch up and all the small ones were pretty well behaved. It also made me do some tidying so the house isn't quite as much of a bombs items as usual

Bomb site. I need to get better at multi tasking!

Sounds like a good day

Wow posted too soon....sounds like a good day cud it's great when everything goes well for a bit - makes you feel like you can keep going!

Second batch of injections today for DS. He was very brave - last time his shriek was the right pitch to set off the alarm at the surgery, and this time it didn't go off!

But he has picked up his second cold - poor little man has spent the day miserable with snot running into his mouth every time he sneezes. I am literally drenched in dribble and snot. He's finally drifted off to sleep and looks peaceful for the first time today. Shame I have to wake him for a feed in an hour!

DS is on his way home after two days and a night away - on top of being away three nights last week and out on Monday night/working til bedtime on Ruesday. Really looking forward to seeing him, but he won't be home tonight til 11 and we've got plans to go out tomorrow evening then a weekend of separate plans ahead of us... I miss my husband! And sleep. But mostly my husband. But sleep too...

That should of course be DH who's been away, not DS... Can you imagine?!

Damn you autocorrect!

cud that's terrifying! I didn't think oven doors could shatter!!!

Woohoo chinchilla! Thats some good sleeping, lovely!

clumsy what a quadruple whammy, sorry you're feeling so crap. My gig went really well, thanks! It was so good to sing again, even if i felt pretty rusty. Good feedback though.

handbag he set the alarm off last time?! Those are some kind :) poor baby, cold and jabs. Are your DH's working hours a one-off or is this usual?

clumsy that also made me smile btw

We had the second injections yesterday too handbag. DD was rather grumpy going in, so the jabs didn't make much difference. She's been a bit out of sorts and warm since. Enjoy your DH's return!

That made me clumsy. Naturally, partly owing to the jabs, we had an interesting evening/night. She'd finally settled on me, but OH hadn't closed the curtains- big things on rattly wooden poles/hoops right over the basket- and sure enough, closing woke her. She wouldn't settle properly again in basket so got her out at nine to feed down.
She then woke in the middle of the night for an hour long fart-a-thon next to me, with extra wriggles, AND then DS yelled for me that he wanted his dummy . He never wakes.
Thanks kids....

Haquoi you use wool wraps don't you? Would you like two more? Size 2/large. One is a bit stained but I remember was bomb proof. They probably need washing and relanolising as have been in the loft for 6/7 years but if you'd like them I will gladly send them out to you. I also have a tots bots red fleece wrap (size 2) and 3 wahm fleece wraps (I think size 1)if you're interested?

I also have 5 super absorbant nappies (3 ellas house hemp, 2 wee notions microfibre) that I used to use as night nappies and a massive pile of pocket nappy inserts/boosters. If anyone wants any of it they'd be more than welcome. It's all well used but still ok.

I may have been slightly nappy obsessed with my older dc and as a result have waaaay more than I need. (That and the discount I got for being an advisor) Would rather it was being used than sat in my loft so please feel free to take it off my hands