December 2012: the one where they're all potty trained. Sort of....

[Barbeasty]

The old thread was getting dangerously close to 1000 messages, so thought I'd better start this one.

Frazzled i am so sorry that you have had a rubbish Christmas. If it helps look how far you have come, in a year your whole life turned upside down and you haven't crumbled, you've kept going. Be proud of yourself its a massive achievement. Also knowing that you need time to concentrate on yourself is a huge thing to admit well done you.

WL i hope your DH realises that this is an issue for your relationship and that only he can fix that issue.I think sometimes people don't realise their issues or obsessions affect others. Maybe if you wrote it down for him he could process it better particularly if you point out things he is missing or not helping with. And i know you've been unhappy with your job a while now. I hope that your chat with your boss goes well but at the same time maybe it is time to look around for a new job. There is no point staying somewhere you are unhappy, life is far to short for that. Don't worry too much things will work out for you.

Nutella DS is ace on his scooter, and your poor Dd. H got all her teeth at once. We use to peel carrots leave them in cold water and give her them to chew at. She couldn't get big chunks off but she did seem to find some relief from it.

Beasty, A looked good on the pictures of his horse riding. He does look as though he loves it. I know someone who brought their 3 year old a horse. Everyone was saying she was spoilt but the girl loved it and i can't see whats spoilt about having to out every day no matter what the weather to clean out a stable and look after a horse. The girl is in her teens now and is deeply passionate about horses and still has her horse and still works very hard to look after it.

Hugs and all round x

WL hope he sorts himself out.
What is it about the job- is it the job itself, the colleagues or the company? If it's the 1st then can you talk to them about other opportunities which may be coming up? If either of the other 2 then start looking elsewhere. Hope it improves.

Frazzled hope things improve for you over the year and that the weekend was the lowest point. I agree with Hales that you've been incredibly strong.

Hales he loves it. His 1st sentence was "I need to ride a horsey". But I'm not getting him one!! He did ask Santa for one, when he did the ride to Santa. Santa very sensibly said that maybe when he's mummy's age he can have a horse!

WL you've got some great advice about work already. I like Beasty's approach. I hope your chat goes well with your boss. Sorry to hear about your DH. I try and put my phone down - it is terrible how much time it saps away..... I feel a bit of a prat that I can't put it down more often.

Sadly if your DH doesn't understand the problem then he perhaps he can't see what needs to change or why. While we were at my Mum's with very limited internet I didn't check Facebook for almost two weeks. I didn't miss it! It made me realise how pointless it can be. Sadly... I'm still checking it probably a dozen times a day. When I have a minute I pick up my phone and look. Although I find myself telling me that it is pointless

Hales yes I remember H being quick with the teeth! Thank you, carrot sticks might help. She is ok most of the time, when she sits chewing her fingers she says "owaaaa owaaaa" which means it hurts. I'm not sure if she means she bit her fingers or her teeth hurt

We have lots and lots of snow! DS loves it. I am full of cold so I could really do without snow this week!

The snow this morning.

Nutella i am very of the snow. I just know H would love it and we haven't had a decent snowfall since she was born.

It's been ages since we had decent snow! We are screwed when it snows though as all back roads.

WL I'm sorry you're having a shit time

Then look at the chaos and small child heaven the snow brought

Wow nutella that looks lush! Hope the excitement distracts dd from her teeth.
beasty it's the role and maybe the company! The people are nice. I've been there 3 months and still don't feel that I know what I'm doing or making any impact. I still really want to make it work as I think I can learn a lot but I am struggling. Am speaking to my boss tomorrow.
Dh has been making a big effort so we'll see. I might suggest to him that we see a counsellor to help us move forward but I'm too tired right now.
frazzled how was going back to work for you?

Yes a bin lorry that accidentally ended up a little bit in a ditch and broken down. Eventually pulled out by a tow truck that was being pulled by a Unimog - which is the orange beast and something that they apparently use up in the Alps. DS got to watch it being pulled out on his way home from kindergarten.

Probably the best thing a toddler could ever wish for!

Also jealous of the snow!

I had to leave work early to take DD to the Dr today. Her tonsillitis has been getting progressively worse, so it looks like she might miss the 1st week back this term. No arguments about needing antibiotics this time though.

And while I took her there, A fell asleep on MIL's knee and did an enormous wee on her. There's just a little bit of me that says that if you will let him fall asleep at 5pm......

At least he seems to have finally gone to sleep now.

beasty I hope dd feels better soon. Horrible for her to miss the start of term.
I would be most peeved if mil let T sleep at 5pm. Yes I know it's lovely when they sleep on you but it is not lovely when they are up half the night!

Beasty your poor Dd i bet you both can't wait for those tonsils to be removed.

Nutella, H would have loved to have seen all the lorry drama.

WL

Poor DD Beasty. I've had pharyngitis/laryngitis/tonsillitis for 3 weeks now. It's rife here and a really nasty one. And yeah that serves MiL right. No naps in this house for over a year!

Snow looks awesome Nutella. J loves snow. And bin lorries. That's definitely his idea of a best day ever!

Glad DH has pulled his socks up WL.

Work was good. Glad to be back. Nice and busy and lots of lovely people around. Very good for me I still have a little cry every night but I'm able to stay alone now. My mum and dad have their spare room back!

I joined meet up and have signed up for some stuff over the next few weeks. Pulling myself together!

Well done willyou!

Ds still naps every day I usually wake him after an hour.

Beasty poor dd hopefully not long until they come up.

Counselling sounds like a good idea WL.

We're off to Southampton today as dd has physio and neurology appts.

Ds had his first full day at pre school yesterday and it went well but when I came home there was a small poo accident in his pants he was obv too shy to say even though he wees fine there.

frazzled that sounds like you're making great progress. Don't underestimate the power of a little cry - let it out if it needs to come and you'll get there faster imo.
Had a good chat with my boss today, she was v nice and said I'm doing as well as can be expected and is happy and it just needs time as v complex role and org etc, and she sees me in the long term. It will be good for me if I can make it work but I am so out of my comfort zone.
There's def some January blues going on having - I have really missed the dds this week and was so wrapped up I forgot to notes on their lunch boxes today. Ts first day at preschool tomorrow. My baby is grown up!

Morning all. It is still bloody cold here!

WL if your boss has faith then believe them and believe in yourself. They would be having words f they thought you couldn't do it.
I hope DH says yes to some counselling for you.
DH wants us to go to some counselling, I've said yes but he still hasn't sorted anything out. He is an awful listener. He will ask me what's wrong. I tell him and then he talks about something completely different. I get angry because he hasn't listened to me at all and so we spin round and round in circles!

DS still needs a nap a few times a week and he wakes after about 45 minutes at the longest. It makes going to bed a bit more challenging but nothing like what we used to have.

Hold in there folks, it is almost the weekend! not that it makes much difference....

nutella the short answer is that men are annoying! Dh is still trying really hard and it's made a massive difference this week. The counselling would be to help us ensure that its a long term change and that I don't unreasonably harp back to it etc. I hope your dh sorts out counselling. I think for us it's partly about having been together for so long and so busy etc that we forget to pay particular attention to each other.
T apparently had a good day but woke up crying not long after I got home (late from big work annual pow wow) and clung to my head for 40 mins saying she didn't want to be on her own. She even had a bit of boob which is obv milk less but reassurance and closeness for her. Poor soul. I do hope this doesn't foretell some tricky times ahead.

WL you are absolutely right. I do sometimes wonder why I bother trying to live with one! I used to live on my own and do whatever I liked whenever I liked. It was great! I had no body loading my dishwasher badly or eating the last biscuit. Nobody else's dirty clothes to worry about.... Bliss!
Although he is handy with the kids and I do like him really.....

Our snow is melting. It isn't yet warm enough not to be very icy though... Made for an interesting walk this morning

WL i think that your chat with your boss sounds positive. It also sounds like they were expecting it to take a while for you to settle in.

Nutella and WL i hope counselling does work for you both. I think counselling is always a good thing having someone independent view your problems always helps.

I can't believe our DC are starting Nursery, although i know H needs too.

H watched Lip Sinc Battle today and was glued to it, she was dancing along with it.

Ewww H just vomited into my hands. This is not how my saturday nights use to be. Haha.

Oh hales that isn't fun! Hope it was a one off. Fingers crossed, the last bug or two we have had has only been diarrhoea

Oh no hales I hope H is ok. I hope everyone has had nice weekends and no one is suffering with all the rain and floods.

She was fine it was a one off but led to much drama from her. And alot of running to the toilet to spit haha. Shes a funny thing. She told my dad that his teeth were nice and yellow after he had said it was important to brush your teeth every day

That's the great thing about toddlers hales no mental filter whatsoever DS told DH that he has a big belly. He told me that my tummy is special (which I really appreciate, since my belly is probably bigger than DH's belly)

This morning they both helped me getting dressed - DH was away overnight - they brought me 5 pairs of pants and at least three t-shirts. Thanks kids! Oh and no socks. Until I asked for some. Then DS brought me one pair. He loves helping