September 2006 Babies - growing in front of our eyes!

[Lysettes]

New thread everyone!

Clairmow - I have a sister but, although we get on well, we are not all that huggy kissy iykwim. I could talk to my mum and she would be (and is) madly supportive but her answer is to bottle feed and give solids (very old school!) though she supports me bf. dh is useless. I still I was is was pg with dd and all the s**t that followed and then his uncontrollable temper tantrums. He was v jealous of dd and my relationship. With ds, he was so paralletic after the birth in the delivery room that he collapsed and fell asleep on the floor. Got home two hrs after delivery and he went to bed for 4 hrs. he didn't even get to see dd meet ds for the first time. and on and on and on................He has no idea what it is like. re: him never in. He works a distance away from home and drives daily to get there then is involved in politics and holds a council position which requires him to be out most eves. He is a fantastic provider for the family but not great at emotional/practical support

Oh F* dunno what happened to half of hte message there, But the bit about him sleeping with someone else during dd's pg is missing.

One more thing , ds will not take a bottle of either formula or ebm. He goes ballistic! He won't take a dummy either (I guess the two are related) Mind you, having just re-read the dummy thread and seeing mums are getting up frequently during the night to replace lost dummies I should be quite relieved that he won't take one! The bottle thing does concern me though as I am unable to leave him for anytime at all as he will not feed from anything but me. Anyone had this problem? btw - I feel better about stuff today as my ma is coming for a couple more days until dh returns from Far East Still no less overwhelmed but a spare pair of hands is soooo helpful.

Where is everyone???!!!!!

Claire - DH is very sensible and I'm very very lucky.
Mabel - do take care not to overheat your little one. I've read in lots of places not to worry about cold hand and feet but I also worry that it must be uncomfortable. What about putting scratch mits/socks on your LO's hands at night? Mine sleeps in a vest, bundler and grobag.

Cruise - just read your messages and wish I could say something to help re your other half. I suppose talking is the only answer but I know that sounds really patronising and would be a lot easier if he was around a bit more. Glad your mum is around. Can you talk to her about it?

Have you tried any different bottles with DS? I saw some tommy tipee ones the other day specially designed for BF babies. I don't know what they're like because my DS gulps it down wherever its from! I know what you mean about being so tied with the BF. Even if you do get away for a while leaving EBM or a FF, your boobs get so full and painful. Don't fancy expressing when on my travels...

bristols - re:tommee tippee - i've just rung hv who recommended just that! gonna look it up on web to see where they stock them. ta.

bristols - my ma knows all about dh. His temper, infidelity, his drinking, the way he sometimes talks to me etc. and she is so supportive but she lives 70 miles away with my dad who has cancer so she can't always be here . I'mnot gonna go on and on about stuff on here as dd is v computer wise and this pc is shared with dh who returns from abroad on fri. But thanks

bristols - my ma knows all about dh. His temper, infidelity, his drinking, the way he sometimes talks to me etc. and she is so supportive but she lives 70 miles away with my dad who has cancer so she can't always be here . I'mnot gonna go on and on about stuff on here as dd is v computer wise and this pc is shared with dh who returns from abroad on fri. But thanks

where is everyone today??!

hi all,

Cruise, think we all feel guilty about things i have not bf any of my 3 always feel bad about that. I spend no where near has much time with ds2 as i did with dd and ds1.

Mable i still swaddle ds have been thinking about this, how do you know when to stop.

ds now weighs 12lb 14oz and is 10 weeks this week.

ds1 and ds2 have chest infections it is a nightmare at the moment in this house. luckly it is not interupting ds2 routine yet, fully expecting it to though.

Mabel - as we live in the 'frozen north' (must be mild compared to tassis though!) our house gets pretty chilly at night and DS2 sleeps in vest, babygrow and 2.5 tog grobag. His hands are like little popsicles but his tummy's always warm. I;ve heard that if a baby is cold, they'll let you know, but if they're too warm they won't so better be on the safe side. Gro-bag say that as long as the room is around 18-21 degrees (C) the level of clothing I've just described is OK. If it's any more then it goes down to just a vest.

Cruise - sorry about your troubles with DH but I guess things must be reasonably ok if you're looking forward to him coming home. About the difficulty with bottles - having had two very fussy babies when it comes to teats all I can say is keep trying different ones. After all the fuss with DS2 we're now on NUK wide neck bottles and med flow NUK teats - they're very boob like - more so than the avent/tommee tippee ones. Might be an idea if they don't work?

We're getting there (slowly) - DS2's discovered sucking his index finger and thumb though he can only manage for 30sec or so at a time. This meant that last night we didn't have to get up to re-insert a dummy though he did wake up and cry for a minute or so on and off for an hour around 3am. After settling himself 'properly' he then woke at 6.45am! - only aother 15 minutes to push it and we're there!

liquid - who says i am looking forward to it???!

jam - wot the heck was the other thread??????? i have to know!

Sorry Cruise - I misread the smile you put after the bit you wrote about him returning - I guess the smile was for your mum instead.

no probs liquid. It was a smile attached to the 'thanks' Here's another one - just for you...

Evening everyone. Sorry to hear you're going through it with dh Cruisemum. No advice really, although have you considered Relate?
Things are okayish here although I keep thinking 'when will it get better'... lol Was feeling teary and panicky last week and on the verge of calling the GP but seem to be a bit better this week. Have no experince of depression so can't tell if it's just the normal stress-mum-of-two etc or something more to worry about. Fingers crossed we all have a good night

Compo - ohmygosh! that is EXACTLY how I was feeling last week/beginning of this week. Read my post sent yesterday and you will see you are definitely NOT ALONE!! I was very teary this morning and panicky about everything - naps/no naps, nights/waking/sleeping/feeding/bf and so the list goes on.... I do feel better today. I was even fraught with anxiety over Christmas cards . Hopefully it will pass for you as it has for me. Defo don't feel anywhere near as bad now. But it was dreadful . Chin up and sending hugs to you

hi all,

Cruisemum, I don't really know what to say re. DH - Compo's suggestion is good though about Relate, if you feel it's appropriate. Compo, I hope you're ok?

Liquid - great night for you! Last night we had a waking at 4.30, and F shouted a bit (not crying though) for a good half hour, began to seem like he was going to cry. I was literally getting out of bed to feed him, and DH went to the loo, when he stopped, I heard sucking (forefinger and middle finger for him, or sometimes an entire fist), and we heard nothing more - woke him up at 7.10!!! Clearly didn't need a feed then at 4.30...!!!

Interestingly, I gave him his formula bottle this morning - downed it in about 10 mins. After lunch, I gave him an EBM bottle - fought it and took 35 mins to drink 6 oz. Has anyone heard of a baby choosing formula over breast milk - is this common? Made me feel a bit rejected... or maybe the formula just filled him up and he wasn't really ready for a feed? (he drank a good 7 oz formula around 11, and I offered the EBM at about 2.30 - maybe should have waited longer?).

Hello everyone,
well we're off to Germany tomorrow and DS has come down with another cold, he is coughing a bit and sounds quite thick with snot. I'm a bit worried about the flight now, should we be taking him on a plane if he is full of snot??

hi Myrtle, don't worry too much, it's a short flight I guess? He might find take off and landing uncomfortable though with the changes in pressure - maybe give him something to suck - milk or a sweetie or whatever.

Clairemow, its only an hour flight and we're taking the dummy but I'm going to try and feed him when going up and down. I'm just a bit worried about him, after sleeping really well for the past week, last night he was up every 3 hours. He's 11 weeks now so I did wonder if he might be having a growth spurt, do they have one around this age?

myrtle - re g.s. they say they have one abt 12 weeks so it could be that...

Fantastic night last night! He woke and grumbled for 5-10mins a few times around 3-4am but then we had to wake him for his feed at 7.25am!!! WOW!!!

Clairemow - I wouldn't feel rejected if I were you, he was probably just full up. As I understand our routine plan the 2.30pm feed should be a bit smaller than the 11am one anyway. As long as he was relatively happy for the rest of the afternoon don't get stressed about it. &oz is quite a lot for such a young baby though - little greedy guts! - I'm still struggling to get DS2 to take 5oz

Has anyone had any experience setting up their own company? I've had an order form a friend to make all her wedding invitations, orders of service and place cards. I've been meaning to set up a sideline in hand crafted cards etc for a few years now but haven't got round to it (certain little poeple and a masters taking up all my free time!). If anyone has any advice I'd be very grateful!

Wow...great night for you too liquid!! Myrtle, Jack was up every 3 hours again last night & he is 11 weeks...I'm so tired today. It's not as if he was going through yet but he was more settled...or so I thought!! We tried to dream fed him again at 11 but he only took 3oz & I was up thereafter at 1.30...

On the plus side - & for all my virtual friends that have been following me since the beg!!- we had sex last night....YES...I said SEX!!! For the first time since Jan!!!!!!! Hubby went off with a big grin this morning... ...I'm feeling happy & relived.....

Hi all,

Congrats Coriander on doing the deed! Since Jan!! thats a long time! Your hubby mustve thought xmas come early!

Cruisemum I hope you are well.

Hi Liquid, Sorry cant help with the business, but happy that you had a good nights sleep

And for everyone feeling a bit down I think its totally normal there's days I am so happy and then days im just teary and miserable. I think im just constantly thinking about dp going away for xmas. He's going back home for a memorial for his grandmother the trip was planned before we met but now the date is drawing closer (18th dec) I feel so upset that he's not going to be here to celebrate dd first xmas
I'll be going to stay with my mum and dad but its not the same is it?
I keep thinking when dd's older and I show her pics of her first xmas her daddy wont be in them.
Am I being a moany cow? I know its for his Grandmother but I just wish it wasnt this xmas.

Oh well at least I wont be totally alone I'll have dd to make me laugh