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Original poster

sept 2014: babies are here (or coming soon!)

999 replies

allisgood1 · 05/09/2014 14:30

Even though dc3 is end of August, thought I'd start a sept thread :-)

How are you all doing?

dS1 is 9 dats old. Feeding well and surely sleeping well but it's hard to know as I keep falling asleep at night feeding him!

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Allisgood1 · 12/10/2014 21:22

LH, it's normal Smile

He's working on your supply. You can help by eating oats (flapjacks etc) and drinking loads of water. It does settle down but your supply isn't properly established until 8 weeks or so.

OP posts:
topmammy · 12/10/2014 22:32

LH, maybe not till he's a bit older but you could give him some baby rice before a bf to fill him up more. My mum had to do that with my brother as he wanted hourly feeding!

Jessica has been attached to my boobs most of this evening. I sense a growth spurt coming on!

ShowMeShowMeTheWine · 12/10/2014 22:48

Lh, he's cluster feeding and building your supply. This is growth spurt time and very common. If you can, persevere- you're doing brilliantly! For forget, the first 6-8 weeks are about establishing supply and resting to get back to normal after birth. All totally normal. It will pass.
The sickness is probably possetting which is normal too and nothing to worry about albeit messy!
Hope you're doing ok, keep the fluids up and get family/friends to help out. The housework can wait, baby can't!

Nazly · 13/10/2014 03:01

Ladies you may think I am nuts writing this in the middle of night...
I was just thinking how fascinating the nature is; we are making around a litre milk everyday for the baby , just eating and drinking as normal... And it is -supposedly- such good quality milk too :)

Feels a big surreal !

Marjal12 · 13/10/2014 04:16

LH If you want to exclusively BF then ignore me, but I've mix fed both my girls. Both of them didn't put weight on at start, when I was just bf'ing. We were advised to supplement with a formula feed at night. Immediate weight gain, just on one 2-3 oz feed.
P is a cluster feeder and will regularly do breast feeds that last an hour and a half, then come off and be wailing looking a feed again a half hour later. I have no issues with supply and leak milk all over the place, but noticed there was two times during the day that she just never seemed satisfied - around 11am and 7.30pm, so we now give her a wee top up of formula at those times, after at least an hour of breast feeds, if she's still hungry. I still feed her myself all night (normally at 11.30ish, 2.30-4ish, 6.30ish) and every 2-3 hours during day. Without those top up feeds I feel I'd have lost my mind - they allow me to read my older daughter stories at bedtime, and get the occasional nap early evening as I often only get 3 hours tops at night due to P not settling with wind and wanting to sleep on me. I have no intention of switching wholly to bottles, but I honestly feel I couldn't satisfy my baby on my own at those times, and at least she's getting me 90-95% of the time. We use the ready made formula so there's very little faff, or expressed milk if I've had a free half hour at any stage to pump a few oz! My DH baths DD1 then does the evening feed with DD2 and loves it.
There's a lot of guilt that can go with FF or mix feeding, but I say you are the only one experiencing YOUR life, and you need to do what works for you. Good luck with what you decide xx

cookielove · 13/10/2014 09:17

So tired - that is all!

SeptemberBabies · 13/10/2014 12:28

Hi all.

Further to your middle of the night thoughts Nazly, I have been pondering how amazingly responsive the breast feeding mother is.

Two Three examples:

  • Was getting dressed this morning and naked from waist upwards. Had a brief thoughts that DD was due to wake anytime for a feed. Immediately both boobs started dripping.
  • In M&S with DD asleep in carseat in trolley. Another lady came into shop with newborn in a sling, newborn was unsettled and crying. I felt my own letdown immediately, even though my baby was sound asleep.
  • Writing this as DD is asleep. Just the act of thinking/writing about breastfeeding her has given me letdown.

I think that the breastfeeding Mum's body and instincts are truly amazing.

Well done to all of the breastfeeding Mums out there Smile

ApparentlyNotGoodEnough · 13/10/2014 13:31

Please remember that we're not all able to breast feed. It's great that it's going so well for you but comments like this can make those of us who have failed feel even more inadequate.

I think that the bottle feeding mums instincts are also wonderful.

Well done to all the bottle feeding mums out there.

TeamEponine · 13/10/2014 13:48

I think everyone who manages to get to the end of the day with a baby who is fed, clean and reasonably happy is doing amazingly and has fantastic maternal instincts! Grin

Having said that, there is something quite fascinating about the way a woman's body can become an automated milk machine! september, reading your post started my let down!

Pregnancy, birth (I had an ELCS) and feeding have given me a new appreciation for how amazing our biological systems are. Just wish they coped with sleep deprivation a little better!!! Shock

cookielove · 13/10/2014 14:31

apparently thank you for posting that, was feeling kinda crap after reading September's post.

Agree with Team happy healthy babies its all what we want right?

Also for those of you in the late night/all night wakings i was there not that long ago and if ds hadn't come so super early I would still be in thick of it, it gets easier quickly I promise.

Ds is unsettled today :( lots of snuggles to be had!

LH1981 · 13/10/2014 14:35

Apparently I don't think anyone on here is judging or snubbing formula feeding, rather marvelling at what a woman's body is capable of. Whether or not it's working for you, it's kind of amazing and that's all that's being said really. There's nothing wrong at all with FF.
I wasn't able to BF my first ds, and am having problems this time around with supply/demand, but I'm not taking offence. However you feed your baby, as long as he/she is healthy and happy that's what we're all aiming for.

Thanks ladies for all your advice! Marjal, thanks for your take on it - I appreciate another view. I'm going to try and give it a little longer, then I might try introducing a supplement feed in the evening to see if that gives me a little more rest. I find I can cope in the day, but it's at night I really struggle when he wants to feed every 5 minutes! Maybe if I swapped the 10pm feed with a bottle he might go longer before waking for another feed.

holls2000 · 13/10/2014 17:02

Thanks apparently....I didn't think I was overly fussed about my inability to bf but after a few days of unhappy baby cos he has a sore tum I actually was feeling like the worlds shittiest mum. I feel I'm never off the phone panicking to the HV or the mw. They must think I am nuts.
My parents flew home yesterday and today I am super sad and feel a bit lonely. Going to the inlaws tomorrow for 5 days but that makes me nervous - not sure why, they are lovely, kind, fab people.
3.5 weeks in, anyone else still a bag of nerves?

On another note, have leaky nappy issues. Any tips?

SeptemberBabies · 13/10/2014 17:11

I wasn't judging. Just marvelling.

There are many amazing things that the female body does in the nine months leading up to the birth and in the several months afterwards. Feeding is just one.

We are all amazing Smile

misog2000 · 13/10/2014 19:24

Definitely still a bag of nerves holls, although I feel like I know Emily a bit better now so know what is normal for her. I'm really tired today, it's the first time I've really felt like this - think she must be having a growth spurt or something as she has been demanding bottle after bottle today and been very fussy and won't be put down which is not like her. She doesn't seem poorly just wants to be held and eat all day Confused. I even tried a dummy again to see if that would help her settle but it just got spat out repeatedly.

KatharineClover · 13/10/2014 19:30

Did you know every woman has receptors in the skin of the chest which recognise when a newborn is held skin to skin and will warm up /cool down according to whether the baby is too hot or cold, all women have this ability even if they haven't had babies! Our bodies are amazing x

KatharineClover · 13/10/2014 19:32

Holls, I was permanently on the phone when I had DS1 - I even rang the dr once as he had chewed an envelope and I was worried he'd eaten a tiny bit Blush

Nazly · 13/10/2014 19:40

DS is two months and I am still nervous!!!
I defenitely wasn't judging and I didn't thins Sept was either - human body is super fascinating... That's all... I haven't been this amazed by human body ability before the pregnancy... Producing another human being inside us is the most amazing thing and then nourishing them (whatever method) and helping them develop when they are born is also a superb experience

CoolCat2014 · 13/10/2014 20:06

I think babies are pretty amazing. How DD always decides she's hungry the moment I've got hot food ready... That's skilled!

CoolCat2014 · 13/10/2014 20:42

She also knows exactly when mummy & daddy are trying to have some intimate time, and responds by doing the biggest poop ever.

Fantastic contraception these babies...

CumbrianExile · 13/10/2014 20:45

Lol Cool Aidan also knows exactly when I have sat down to food/cuppa's! Its a special gift these little ones have Grin

holls2000 · 13/10/2014 21:00

Katharine, oh thank god, I have rung the docs/HV/midwives so many times. Dry skin/grunty sleeping noises/sore tummy due to formula/not pooed in 24 hours/you name it, I have panicked over it. I swear if I'm like this for the rest of my life, it will see me off….:-)

KatharineClover · 13/10/2014 21:29

I once rang a BF helpline to ask if I should wake ds1 to feed him as I had leaked for the first time (milk wasn't coming in properly due to post partum haemorrhage). These things seem silly now, but at the time I was so anxious.
Holls, please tell me to butt out, but are you ok? I had mild form of pnd - the HV called it post natal anxiety which described me perfectly - I wasn't sad but my anxiety levels were through the roof. My HV did home visits for a few weeks called 'listening visits' to help me to talk things through.
Ladies who hoped to bf but haven't been able to - with ds1 it took me a looong time to grieve for the bf experience I had hoped for but didn't achieve I used to cry reading the 'bf is best' message on the formula tub) - sometimes circumstances conspire against us, be kind to yourselves xx

ShowMeShowMeTheWine · 13/10/2014 21:38

Don't know if it's a 2nd baby thing but I feel massively different this time around compared to dd1. Feel really bad in a way that I had such a bad time with her- would it have affected her? Guilty that I felt that way and don't this time. Don't get me wrong, I'm shattered and frustrated a lot of the time but I'm so much happier this time round.

EllaBella220 · 13/10/2014 21:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

holls2000 · 13/10/2014 21:47

Suspect may be a tad anxious going to mention to hv tomorrow - my mum has been there for previous mw and hv visits and I didn't want to worry her. Im not sad but have occasional cries but I do worry about everything. I feel so stupid - in real life im a capable woman but I have gone all wobbly over this tiny boy