sept 2014: babies are here (or coming soon!)

[allisgood1]

Even though dc3 is end of August, thought I'd start a sept thread :-)

How are you all doing?

dS1 is 9 dats old. Feeding well and surely sleeping well but it's hard to know as I keep falling asleep at night feeding him!

Polka, day 4 was the day I melted down and was rescued by a neighbour...

Nazly, my supply seems to have improved slightly. I was pumping constantly all weekend and I think it may have helped. Its also possible it went down due to me (and DS) now having a wonderful dose of flu. Plus I have taken Fengreek since Sat. Whichever it is, things seems to have improved. I got off around 1000ml yesterday, and I've had a good start already this morning. DS is eating 900mls a day though which is apparently top end for a 1 month old according to Kelly's Mom website. (Clear he is a greedy little fucker!)

I spoke to the HV yesterday regarding feed sizes and the lack of information / conflicting information I'm being given/finding. She very helpfully told me, that based on DS's weight using the formula she has for calculating how much a baby should eat in a day, that he should have 450mls. He was eating considerably more than that before there was concern about his weight gain being slow and I increased his feed size! She back tracked after I told her what he was having, and said to carry on as I was doing it right as he has gone from 7lb 6 last Thursday to 8lb 6 yesterday which she was pleased with. She told me to ring them if I had anymore questions about expressing (?!)

It really does highlight how little support there is for expressing. I find it nuts if they are really committed to 'breast is best' over formula as this is a half way house and there are loads of practical reasons why women might want to part express even if they are breast feeding. Its frustrating. And its not much better online either, which I find even more surprising.

I did find an online guide that suggested a feed for a 1 to 2 months old, should be about 120 to 150mls of milk for each bottle. And by 3 to 4 months of age, this may increase to about 150 to 220 mls per feed. But it does depend on the baby and some need more feeds than others too.

DS is 1 month today and on 100mls, 9 times a day. So 120 - 150ml seems about right to me (He's draining a bottle pretty easily, so I think we will be upping his feed again in the next few days).

Polka- hang in there. As others have said it's baby blues Give yourself a break, you are doing great

Re: bf. I'm not eating enough calories but I am eating oats which increase supply. Also, I avoid spicy food as I've found that it always makes baby unsettled. With dd2 dairy caused major issues, so if you suspect this I would cut it for a week and see what happens. The results are v quick.

Re: dummy. Tried this over the weekend out if desperation and DS not interested at all.

Re: sleep. DS will only settle on me in the day. At night he settles after a mega feeding session around 10-11 and sleeps until 3-4am. After that he's up every 2 hours. I reckon I get around 8 hours every night but only 6 unbroken.

Has anyone taken their baby to see the chiropractor? I didn't with my first two but DS has an appointment fri am. I hope they fix his car seat issue, he screams the whole car journey!!

Well, seems as though most of us are in the same boat sleep-wise, thanks for sharing! It feels like I'm the only one awake during the early hours. My DH is sleeping in the spare room as I'm solely BF, and haven't tried expressing, so didn't think there was any point in us both being exhausted. However, it is quite lonely and seeing as he has 4 weeks paternity leave, thinking of asking for some help, even if it's with settling him between feeds or something.

Saying that, last night was a good night where I only had to do 3 feeds, about 2-3 hours apart. Feeling a bit better for some sleep!

Polka, I agree with the other ladies - please don't worry, it really does just sound like the baby blues. Mother Nature is a bitch sometimes! I suffered badly for about two weeks once my first ds was born, bursting into tears all the time and thinking everyone and everything was against me and I was totally inadequate. It passed and everything was suddenly so much better! Luckily didn't get it with ds2 or this time around. Just go easy on yourself.

Dry skin here too, plus mild baby acne. Been told it will just go away on it's own, plus the olive oil thing too.

xx

Oh yes we have horrible baby acne too. Been going for nearly three weeks!!

Baby acne here too

I'm very tempted to try a dummy. I'm sure he's comfort feeding, weighed today and he's put on 1lb5oz in 8 days, and had already put on 11oz in the 5 days previous to that . He's jumped from the 75th to 91st percentile. I'm not sure when to actually use a dummy though

I was still unsure I was feeding him correctly (despite weight gain!) so went to the breastfeeding clinic at the hospital. I'd definitely recommend if anyone's having problems, it was an hour session with a midwife and she really reassured me that with a couple of adjustments we're doing fine. Unfortunately I have very fast milk flow which causes him to choke and pull back and spray milk everywhere

I was talked too quickly last time. I pumped yesterday and got less than a oz! I used to pump 3! So ive been pumping/feeding from breast first to try and increase.

Baby also chokes on breast. I have big boobs and odd shaped nipples kinda on the side iyswim and seems like he takea too mucj in and chokes then gets upset

polka As you can see from other posts,you're definitely not alone. We are on day 9 and I've already had 2 meltdowns when I just thought everything I was doing was absolutely wrong and felt I disappointed everyone as having a lots of bf problems. Since day 3 I've been forced to express as Christian refuses breast most of the times. Also one day it really seemed I had no milk at all and was afraid my boy was going to be hungry.. Had to use formula for that day.
Now I know I just stressed myself and that didnt help with my supply,also that formula doesnt mean I do something wrong with my baby.
It takes a time but bf getting better every day as we both learn from our mistakes and now when Im calmer,supply is much better. I can express even 100ml from one session,usually every two hours as my boobs get sooo full,plus something gets Christian directly from me (how much depends on how much he wants to try)

red You're absolutely right about the drinking! Im absolutely rubbish with that. Managed to control it and drink a lot while pregnant. At the hospital as well,though. Since home I've not been able to drink even half of what normally. I have to keep an eye on it. Want more milk,no less.

About expressing: Its true there isnt a lot of support. I didnt find much information. Only midwife told me that at this age (a week or two old) should drink about 90ml every 3-4 hours. Well, my boy drinks 60-80ml every two. Hour ago he drank 150ml within half an hour. Always fell asleep after some amount,minute later woke up wanting more and again and again. Only about 30ml was straight from me,unfortunately. But still bigger success than three days ago.

About sleep: first 5 days after labour I didnt sleep at all but somehow managed to function almost normally (as normally as possible after c section). Couldnt sleep at night as listening Ch. breathing and every movement. Then got like an hour during day and two at night. From day 7 learnt how to sleep at night again and having around 3-4 hours each night. Sometimes get a nap during the day as have a hubby on paternity leave just now. I've never needed a lot of sleep (6 hours each night was ok for long periods) so getting used to this new pattern as well.

My boy wakes up every 2-3 hours. As I express we can take turns with hubby but its harder for him to cope with less sleep so mostly I do feeds and nappies during night. But when necessary he does what needs to be done. And he does a lot of nappies and feeding during day as well as keeping house tidy (as I cant do all household cleaning) so really happy to have him around. Also its nice to have him here to comfort Ch. while warming his feed or so.

Sorry everyone for a long post. Enjoying little bit of adult contact

Hi all...sorry to butt in mid conversation...just wondered if I could join in.

My son was born 23/09/2014 weighing 8lb 11ozs. He is my third child - the eldest 2 being twins aged nearly twelve. His birth was a successful Vbac and I have pretty much been on cloud 9 since he was born. I'm bottle feeding which probably cuts a lot of stress for me and he is a good sleeper and generally very content little boy. I was worried before I had him about the first few months because when I had the twins I found it hard work and generally difficult to bond with them...but his time round I am ok (so far).

I guess my main gripe is that I feel in a little bubble at the moment - i am loving spending time with my DP and baby...but on Monday DP goes back to work and then it's on with life. I am on such a high that I don't want to go back to reality...everything feels perfect.

Anyway congratulations to everyone..nobody in my real life has had a baby in the last few years so it's comforting to read other stories xx

So. Midwife came today - the head honcho. She was so lovely. B has put on 150g since Sunday and she was cross that I had been stressed by other mw,. Seemingly normal for babies to out on weight then plateau. She also seemed unconcerned by jaundice but us coming back on fri to check. She was also only mw who asked how I was, whether I was eating etc....said I am big eating if drinking enough. Didnt grump at the combination feeding but said am expressing good volumes so to keep it up.

I cried. It's day 13 and I am so tired. My mum is here and I am sure I could go for a sleep whilst she watched b but I don't want to let anyone else near him. She and my stepdad smoke and have been having their fags by the washing which us drying on the line.....the house smells of smoke too now.

B takes his milk too quickly from bottle almost every feed he has a choke and a splutter - any ideas for slowing the flow down! Am using Avent size 2 teats.

Holls, dd gulps at the breast and chokes herself nearly every feed. I've (nearly) stopped worrying, she clears it quite quickly and is just a greedy guts! As long as they seem to be coping I'd not worry too much.

I've bought some soya milk to have instead as I'm going to try cutting out dairy to see if it makes Jessica more settled. Although accord to The Wonder Weeks app she is going through a mental leap in development currently which can make babies more unsettled. Anyone else got this app? It's quite interesting.

Jessica still not interested in the dummy. Not sure what to do about that.

My left boob particularly likes to choke poor Jessie. Right boob is less troublesome lol.

I'm still not drinking enough which is not helping constipation! I have somehow managed to choke on/ inhale water a few times which doesn't help with the speed that I can drink as I'm scared of it happening again. I know this makes me sound like a nutcase lol. At least I am making milk still for Jess though.

Welcome jay. Congrats on your little boy

I have the wonder weeks app, 6 days till his first leap! I do wonder if I'm better not knowing, seems not good to be just waiting for a change. On a good note, baby just slept for 3.5 hours - that's his longest ever sleep!

Welcome Jay and congratulations on your son

Welcome Jay

Jessica just did 5 hours that's the most sleep I've had since her birth. I did naturally wake up after 3 hours though - that's how much my body clock has got used to it! The only thing I did different last night was give her 2 doses of infacol so maybe that's what did it.

Thank you so much to you all for your understanding. Ive decided Im going to give up breast feeding, I know most of you are getting on well with it but DH and I are suffering and I am genuinely concerned for both of us. He is suffering the effectd of sleep deprivation more than me as DS refuses to sleep anywhere but on us.

Having another nightmare night. Trying infacol tonight for the first time. Hope it starts to make a difference soon. Baby has been bitty feeding and won't be put down since 1.30. DH has just given up and gone to try a sleep on the couch for an hour before going to work. Baby is so easy during the day, but why can't I work out the nights?

Polka just do what feels right for you, and hope you start to feel better.

Team apparently they cluster feed around this time as milk-making hormone concentration is higher now, so it's effectively the best time for them to get supply up. We've got a really good bf support team round here and they say that that's all they're doing for the first 6 weeks, trying to develop supply, and then everything gets a bit easier... I'm on week 4 now so hoping that's the case anyway!

Thing is, I wouldn't mind so much if she was feeding properly for all this time. She just kind of flutter feeds (if that makes any sense) and falls asleep whilst being winded, but as soon as I try to put her down she starts whinging and rooting for food again. Not sure what to do next really Feels like I'm rapidly failing at this!

team, maybe strip her for feeds and have skin to skin, so she is a bit more awake. just keep her back covered so she stays warm

Team, what you described is exactly what Jess often does. It's frustrating I know. I still think it's wind causing it as being laid flat hurts more with wind. Try lots of different winding positions and it might bring a burp up. Or you could try a dummy, Jess still not impressed with the dummy though lol.

The lactation consultant /specialist midwife appt was really helpful - Danny's tongue tie has reattached, and I am in the unlucky 1% of women who have IGT (insufficient glandular tissue - so even if my boys hadn't had TT issues I would not have been able to exclusively breastfeed). We won't re snip after the complications he had with the first procedure (plus it would involve going privately to the uk tt specialist).
I've done what I can to maximise my minimal supply and I am currently still offering a breast feed before topping up as I'm hoping he will still get some benefit from the breastmilk he receives, plus the movement will help his tongue - and I now have a plan for how much top up and when. Danny has been acting very contentedly but losing weight up til now - however, since getting this expert advice he gained 180g in a day and a half! It's like he has found his appetite :) I am trying to express when I can, but now DH is back at work I'm not managing very often.
I hadn't hoped to use formula but I can now accept it as necessary for him to grow and develop and I feel such a lot happier about the situation. I just wish I'd known this with DS1 as our feeding issues were a large part of my pnd last time. I feel a lot more peace about the whole situation now I have some answers, even if solutions aren't possible Feeling like I can enjoy my baby now :)

team mine has been doing that too, lasted 4 days but yesterday he just slept. After cluster feeding for days and getting my supply up he didn't feed much last night which has left me rather large and uncomfortable! After his big sleep he was awake for most of the night in some sort of discomfort . An explosive nappy seems to have rectified the situation

Team, tis normal I had that all day yesterday, from 4am-11pm he was really really unhappy unless on the boob, drawing his legs up like he had bad wind, would NOT settle. I finally knew he passed out at 11, put him down and he woke at 6!!!! He's fed twice since and is currently sleeping. It's a growth spurt. It's normal. It will pass. I promise.

Thanks all for your kind words I think that sleep deprivation is getting to me! Mum is coming up today so hopefully I can catch up a little. Fingers crossed this passes quickly! X