Welcome to the world June 2014 babies

[Panicmechanic20]

Hello, any other mummies with newborn June babies? I have a gorgeous 12 day old son and a 3 year old DD. anyone else out there?

Can I ask when are you meant to try and get babies into a bedtime routine. DD doesn't seem to have a pattern, sometimes will drop off at seven, others will remain full of beans and refuse to be put down til 2 am. Once she is down she is a good sleeper and will sleep in four hour stretches til morning, only half waking to feed and going straight back to sleep.

I don't think babies have a body clock till around 6 weeks old (I think), before that they've no sense of day/night. You can try a routine whenever you want though, to make them and you both familiar with it. It can't hurt, but don't expect too much.

That said, there's a noticeable rythm to DD which I can use to my advantage for planning things. She has a couple of 'good' feeds and sleeps through the day. They're not the same times each day, but there is a pattern. Have you tried noting down when your LO eat/sleeps and for how long each time? Then you can use any patterns to your advantage. I do an afternoon nap with DD after her big afternoon feed - I know I'll get a good 90m sleep from her then, and can relax and sleep easier myself knowing that.

I think I remember reading that babies have a 28hr rhythm naturally, so will cycle through 'normal' and straight back out the other side again over a few days. Not sure if there's any science behind it though. It was in one of the sleep books I read for DS. I was sleep deprived and desperate after 9 months of broken sleep.

Dd3 is 12 days now and we've started doing the routine tonight although I don't expect it to have any impact on her whatsoever it just works in with what we're already doing with dd2. We couldn't remember when we started with her though so this is just a wild stab in the dark to try and get some order back in our lives. So far she's been not too bad at nights eating at 5 or 6 then taking 3hrs sleeps from then til 6am - that's when we drop back to 1-2 hourly. Hopefully that will change soon too though.

Hi all, congrats to everyone who wasn't on the ante natal thread! Hopefully we'll have a few regulars on here, although my time and energy to sit and type is fairly rubbish but I shall try!

We're into week three and DD is being a gem, feeding often but always pretty easy when not on the boob, so no screaming for no reason! Sleep is so random with newborns!

I found an awesome website the other day which was such a good refresher as I'd forgotten so much from DS - major baby brain!

I can't promise the link will work but it was www.troublesometots.com and had heaps of info and advice on ssleeping. Not much you can do with newborns other than go with the flow but the stuff about getting overtired was a good read!

Any word from mummy midwife? X

We appear to be in the evening cluster feed here. I just hope it ends before I want to sleep! That said, I've found a good feeding/winding position for DD and I. I lay down on my side, DD lays tummy to tummy with me, kind of upright, and looking over my top side. She'll happily wind like this and fall asleep, but if she fusses for food I can move her up to the breast and she'll feed. All the while I can doze :)

DD is 2 weeks today, eats and sleeps pretty well, and put on weight at both day 6, 10 and 13. We're now 8lb something, up from 7lb 4oz at delivery. All would be grand, except for the toddler (18m). He's started needing us to stay with him for naps and nighttime till he falls asleep, sometimes taking well over an hour. He also woke last night in a panic at 2:20 and wouldn't go back to sleep without DH in the room. He finally came through for his pillow at around 4 and spent the rest of the night in there, periodically reassuring DS he was still there. Still, he seems to like his wee sister, wanting to stroke her hair and give her kisses all the time. We had our first family bath this morning too - DS, DD and I all got in together. Not a very relaxing bath for me, but was nice to be together. DS enjoyed it so much we had 2 temper tantrums today with him trying to climb into the bath! I think we may need to start bathing him more than once a week now.

How is everyone else getting on? It's really quiet on here, but I guess everyone is off adapting to life with a new baby?

Hello, hope you are all well. Our DS will be 6 weeks on Friday can't believe it. We seem to be slipping into a routine. Feeding every 3-4 hours and he seems to be more awake during the day. Due to jaundice I am still expressing 5 times a day and giving him 1/2 ff each day. He seems happy with this a not that interested in my breast - I guess he is finding the bottle faster.

Not sure who asked but from week two we bathed him before our DD and then fed him and put him down. He then wakes roughly at 10/11 for a feed.

Hope you all have a good night

Still finding this a massive struggle. Dd3 just wants to feed or be on my lap and in between times she's filling her nappy! Dd2 finding this a major adjustment and being really hard work all the time. Bf still ongoing but I really think it was a mistake to start and now I'm not sure how to stop without giving myself massively sore boobs - can't be done with that on top of the cs pains. I'm just full of the joys!

Dh is off for 3 weeks from Friday so hoping that will help bring this all together a bit better.

Notfast it's hard, especially if you end up with a clingy baby. Is your DH good with the kids? I hope you get some time to yourself over the next 3 weeks, maybe some time home alone with DD3 will help too? I'm finding it hard with just DS wanting his mum back. Are you feeling guilty for not having as much time for them? Have you tried DD on a bottle of expressed milk? Might be a way for you to spend some time with DD 1&2 while your DH feeds DD3. You could also express less each day, and top up with formula, as a way of gradually cutting down and stopping feeding. If you want to stop that is. It's such a massive commitment you need to be happy doing it or you're going to end up feeling down and grumpy. A happy mum is more important than a breastfed baby.

I just had to deal with a poopocalypse. How do such small babies make so much poo? It escaped from the nappy and was up her back up her neck! Cue bath time :)

Oh, something I only learned recently, despite having an 18m old DS. The 'envelope' shoulder vests (overlapping fabric on the shoulders) are designed that way so you can take them off baby over their feet, as well as over the head! Just slip the arms out and into the shoulder hole. Very handy for pooplosions.

stacks yes dh is great with the girls it's going to make a huge difference to have him here esp for dd2 who has really felt the impact. I do feel guilty about it and just hope when it all settles it works out. The baby was for her to have a sibling to play with and have someone to grow up with (dd1 is an adult and doesn't live at home anymore) so the fact it's upsetting her instead is really sad. It's hard when they're too young to understand it's only temporary and mummy will be back soon.

Hv was here today and baby is back to birth weight plus 2.5oz so obviously all this feeding is working for her. I've sort of agreed to go to 4 weeks and see if it settles a bit before I give up on it. Don't think I fully appreciated how actual breastfeeding was going to be.

With you on the poop though - my little darling can fire it out like a torpedo mid change and everyone has to duck for cover. Got our bed sheets at 3am this morning which pleased us all no end. We found out about the vests last baby, she was good and escaping poo too.

notsofastjustfurious agree with you with the poop situation. Well it is déjàvu here! DD seems to do it when she is on her Sunday best or that pretty outfit that you do not want her to get any mustardy colouring!

On a positive note she has given us 2 respite nights where she slept through to 5.30.

Then we have the heat, which means we are back to night watch. Happy weekend ladies xxxx

Notsofast have you got a sling? Although if you had a csection might not be comfortable but DD is a little Velcro baby too, my moby wrap arrived last week and I'm using it an awful lot. Bit sticky in this heat but that and a dummy to help stem the comfort feeding have been a godsend. Also the mother care swaddle with the arm trapping bits..... A normal swaddle was no match for my little Houdini! She looks like she's in a straight jacket but has helped her sleep a little better, we had a 3 hour stretch last night! Yippee!!

I'd like to introduce myself. Baby Eliza will be 5 weeks old tomorrow. She is our 3rd - we have a nearly 7 yr old and a 4 yr old boys. She was a big baby - 10lb 7oz at birth, and I hypnobirthed so no pain relief!! DS2 was also big at 10lb 7.5oz, so I suspected she might be a whopper too despite midwives assuring me she would be around 8lb!!

Breastfeeding took a little while to establish as she had a poor latch, so took ages to feed and made my nipples very sore (thank goodness for Lansinoh lanolin cream!). Although she didn't lose a great deal of weight (about 5%) she took 3 weeks to regain it as was only putting on weight very slowly. My boobs got painfully engorged too due to her not feeding well, but I discovered that by lying down to feed her at night, not only was her latch much better, but it meant I also got some extra sleep. Her feeding is much better now, latch is fine, no pain and she's gaining weight. Still a pretty slow feeder though, and she likes to have both boobs so takes extra long! My boys were both fast feeders from only one boob each feed!

Night times are still pretty erratic. Had a couple of good nights where she went down at 10pm, woke at 3 and then around 6am, but now reverted to waking every 2 hours! Evenings are a challenge - very unsettled just when we're trying to get boys fed and to bed and get our supper.

To top everything off, DH broke his wrist when she was 2.5 weeks old - had to spend a weekend in hospital having surgery and now in plaster for 6 weeks. So he can't pick he up or change a nappy! He was due to take his paternity leave just after the accident (quad biking with work!), ad I had really been looking forward to the rest as he was going to take over school runs and cooking/cleaning. Instead I have ended up doing everything and more!!

Apologies for the mammoth post! Well done if you've read this far!!

Welcome zeeky and congrats on your little girl! Sounds like you have your hands full there. Hope your dh has a speedy recovery.

Miss I do have the moby but find it a bit uncomfortable with the cs and it hurts my back so not sure if I'm doing it wrong - have watched a million instructional videos though so not sure. Also my little suck monster won't take a dummy, have tried her a few times but she just spits it out in disgust. We do seem to be getting on a bit better now and it's just nights that we struggle, she seems too desperate to latch on and I'm too half asleep to do it properly. Going to a local bf support group shortly so hopefully get some help there. Glad to be in the north of Scotland just now too, weather is warm without the horrible heat that seems to be hitting the far south, goodness knows how you're all coping with that!

Afternoon all. It's still so quiet on here, it's a shame. DD is 3 weeks tomorrow, and so far still mostly a 'good' baby (much as I hate using good/bad to describe babies). She's been waking me every 2-3hrs overnight to feed, and cluster feeds through the day, having 2-3hr naps between. Had a bad night a couple of nights ago though, was awake from 8pm till 3am fussing. Not really crying, just on and off the breast, whinging and wriggling. I don't to well with poor sleep any more!

Had her weighed today, she's put in 11oz in a week! I was worried she wasn't taking much milk, as I've been engorged through the afternoon/evening and night and felt like she wasn't taking much at each feed. I must just have too much milk though, as with weight gain like that she's got to be eating! Going to try expressing off a bit to keep comfortable, and hoping it settles down.

Welcome Zeeky, glad you've got the feeding sorted. Well done for sticking with it through the pain. I don't blame people for stopping, but feel you should be very proud of yourself for persevering. Hats off to you managing with your DH out of action too! I'm dreading my DH going back to work, only a week left. He's doing all the childcare for 18m old DS just now. I get an afternoon nap and a lay in just now.

notfast do you have a sling library or group locally you could go to for advice? It can be really awkward getting the fit of a sling right. Once you do though, you know how it feels and should be able to recreate yourself. Did the breastfeeding group help at all?

Thanks Stacks. I think if she had been my first then I would have really struggled with the feeding & would have panicked & possibly given up or started expressing/formula feeding way too early. But as I had breastfed my older too with few problems, I knew what the issues were & how to resolve them. Experience helps so much!

It doesn't help so much with night times though! Thought she was doing ok at night but last night was bad - got about 3 hrs in total between 10pm and 7am - she was either feeding or fussing/crying in the cot. Took her into her nursery & rocked her to sleep on the rocking chair at about 3am after a feed only for her to wake up half hour later seemingly ravenous again!! Thankfully DH offered to walk DS1 to school for me so that I could stay in bed longer - usually have to get up at 7 to get myself & boys ready for school, but DH somehow managed it with the one arm!

I'm hoping tonight will be better...

Morning All and welcome zeeky

DD is 8 weeks, has had horrendous night, thankful it was DH on duty before he starts a stretch of 7 nights

I have gone over and over to replicate the evening of what we did including a staged row when she slept through. Nothing seems to work! I also think she has learnt to not to bother with tidily cry, but to go straight to the screeching blue murder cry and she will get me matching up and down!

On positive note we are getting lots of smiley's and cooing noises. I am convinced she said 'mummy' the other day Her weight is steady going up. We have first immunisation next week, I hope and pray this will not affect her!
DS is on holiday now and is helping around the house, the two are forming sibling understanding despite the 8 year gap!

How is everyone else xxxx

Good effort for trying ACL to trick her into an all night sleep, I can't believe she slept through already though! I'm thrilled if little miss does a 3 hour stretch as its pretty much 2 hourly feeds, so no more than 1.5 hour kip at a time. I'm making an effort to go to bed early but if she's been awake properly then getting her to sleep is a real mission. I'm looking out for all the cues and not letting her get overtired but we still have to battle it out.

My main concern though is DH lack of bond with her. He's from a male dominated family with no sisters, nieces etc. he just doesn't seen to have any interest in the baby. It's almost like he sees her as my baby, not his.

We did have a big chat about it when she was about 2 weeks old and he was honest with me about how he felt bad that DS won't have a brother close in age like he did. It seems that the disappointment of this has almost manifested in not bonding with DD.
I also thought DD was a boy for about 30 seconds when she was a boy (cord/willy confusion!) and he says that during that moment he felt relieved it was a boy and allowed all his reservations about having a girl come to the fore in those moments. That was pretty hard to hear but I know what he means, I equally had that moment of 'oh its not a girl - damn!'.... Until the midwife told me to have another look! So whilst I understand his feelings, SHE is here, here to stay!

I've tried to be patient but his complete disinterest in DD is starting to annoy me. He's an amazing dad to DS, dotes on him completely so I'm hoping when the newborn stage is over and she's got a bit more personality he will be won over. I guess what an grinds on me, is a lack of effort to try and bond. He's changed one nappy in 5 weeks! I expressed a bottle but she didn't really like it and he look so disinterested in the whole thing I ended up feeding her myself.

DS is smitten with her and I think shoes more interest than DH, its a sorry state of affairs when a 3 year old is more doting than the babies father....

Any other suggestions on helping things?

Miss sorry to hear about your concerns over DH. It must be hard knowing he still feels like he's rather a boy, even though he knows he has a girl. I can't really advise much, as DH was so happy to find out we were having a girl. I think it helped that he got the 'unwanted' gender first, and all the benefit then of bonding with his only child.
I will say though, much as DH wanted a girl, he's not been that involved with her yet (she's 3 1/2 weeks now). He's happy to hold her, and would like to feed her a bottle etc, but overall there's not much he can do with her. You can't really pal with a newborn, and get very little back from them. Once you have smiles and giggling it becomes easier as dad can hear and see that baby enjoys their company. Just now DH feels (and often rightly so) that DD would prefer mum and breasts over dad..

Things are ok here. I feel I'm being a good mum to DD, but an awful mum to DS and an awful wife to DH. I don't have the energy or patience to play with DS and deal with his tantrums. I've got a really short fuse and keep getting angry with DH and DS. I've also barely spent any time with DH since having DD. He's sleeping in with DS, I get up later than them, have an afternoon nap, and go to bed early. DH has enjoyed his time alone for the most part, and found fun things to do on his own. So when I asked him to spend time with me the other evening he said no :(
Really don't know how I'm going to cope when DH goes back to work next week. It's so hard to handle DD and DS together, when they both start crying at me I just want to run and hide. I need more energy, patience and hands!

Zeeky (and anyone else who wants to join) there's a secret Facebook group set up where most of the June mums post. It's why this tread is so quiet - everything gets posted on Facebook. If you want to join just pm me your real name on Facebook and I'll get you added. It's all invisible to your friends/newsfeed, and there's usually someone posting something, any time day or night.

Hello folks, I lost this thread for a bit there, must be as it's so quiet it dropped off the radar.

stacks I know exactly what you mean! toddler tantrums have hit a new high here. Seems like nothing pleases her and if she thinks the baby is getting something she isn't all hell breaks loose. I'm dreading dh going back too but have another 2 weeks before I have to worry about that. I didn't make to the bf group - both dc dirtied their nappies, both needed food and both cried (in stereo) when I tried to get them in the car. Two hours later it was too late to go. Still not sure I'm enjoying bfing, it's just sooooo tying and we seem to have dropped to hourly feeds which is making matters worse.

miss that sounds hard! most men want a daddies girl. my dh has 2 and never mentioned wanting a son which is just as well as there'll be no more. I think he will come round when she becomes more interactive. My friends husband took no interest in their baby girl (despite being the one that wanted a baby the most) but was always keen to get playing with my dd, there's no way he will be able to resist her then.

Oh and I had a good day out with the moby the other day so think I've finally cracked it

Hey everyone, sorry for the delay in updates.

So I went for a midwife appt at 41+1 (4.7.14) and mentioned movements had reduced slightly but I wasn't concerned... Had a trip to delivery suite for some monitoring, had no contractions but x2 decelerations in fetal heart rate.. Discussed with a very trusted consultant who advised for induction. So had induction with process started at 7.30pm, kicked off straight away, and was contracting like the clappers by 11pm. Horrific contx on and off until mid morning. Waters broke in my sleep at about midday on 5.7.14 with meconium and a slightly offensive odour. By 5pm I was 4cm and contracting irregularly but hideously painful, sore pain, never felt right. Had pethidine and at 8pm was 5cm. By this point I had enough and was beside myself crying so had an epidural about 9pm, which I cried a lot about. Midnight had synto drip started as progress tailed off. Overnight my temperature increased as did baby's heart rate. At about 7.15am 6.7.14 I was 9cm, my temp increasing which required IV antibiotics, swabs, bloods etc. by 8am very concerned re. Baby's well being, still 9cm so a crash CSection was called for infection (chorioamnionitis). Baby born at 8.49am by CSection in poor condition, transferred to neonatal unit intensive care and made his way through the neonatal unit system over a period of 8days. He had antibiotics, lumbar puncture, blood tests etc and was diagnosed with E. coli sepsis which developed in to bacterial meningitis. On day 8 he was transferred to a paediatric ward to continue IV antibiotics for a full 3weeks. Luckily due to him recovering so well, we both went home on day 11 and was given antibiotics as an outpatient for the rest of the 3weeks. In this time I had a blood transfusion as lost almost 2litres of blood, developed cellulitis so had various antibiotics and am now recovering very well.
Breastfeeding was going really well until I started my last lot of antibiotics and he refused to latch on. I was crying at almost every feed and really struggling so ended up expressing and using formula, which I'm gutted about but he's happy and I'm happy he's well.
So welcome Sebastian, born on 6th July 2014 at 8.49am, weighing in at 4.675kg (10lb 5oz), head circumference 39cm, length 55cm. A really crappy start to life but we are gradually getting there.

Goodness mummy you certainly went through it there! So glad to hear you are both recovering well from your experience, must have been quite scary. He's a good size though, congratulations

Wow mummy poor you. Hope you are better now. My DS is 8 weeks today - can not believe it. We have our jabs later :/. I currently have mastitis which is beyond painful and my poor little DD has a dick bug so not the best week for our little family (and the washing machine). Hope. You are all well. It's such a shame that the thread is so quiet - should we all aim to update on a certain day of the week to get some momentum?