November 2012 - Any tips for surviving the 18-month sleep regression?

[StuntNun]

Previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/postnatal_clubs/2035882-November-2012-Are-the-LOs-old-enough-for-Mothers-Day-yet

Morning!!

Family chips are home!

Welcome home Pass x we have missed you I will be around in 10 mins, put the kettle on (joking)

J settled after about 45 mins of rapid return last night, but he woke at 1am. His voice sounded hoarse, and he felt hot so I took him downstairs and gave him calpol. I then went to put him back to bed and DH said bring him into bed if you don't think he will settle. I was confused as we had discussed this earlier and DH was backtracking. Anyway, we then put J back in bed and had to rapid return for another 20 mins. If DH had not poked his nose in then it may have been different, but J understands quite a bit, and thought he was going to sleep with mummy. I felt awful for J.

I then watched Peaches' last interview about attachment parenting and was very upset to think that J was basically collapsing out of sheer exhaustion, and traumatised. DH is away tonight so I will be doing night 3 on my own. My head says it is kinder in the long run, and when in bed he is sleeping so much better. But my heart just wants to scoop him up and cuddle him

The 18 month regression can only be good for us.

He did not have a temp, just sore teeth.

milky milky

Oh wow, you can actually just watch it here buy clicking on the picture.

I feel awful. Dd was up with a bad dream and I had to go into her bed from 5am. J only woke once requiring me going in. I'm like vq and could easily cuddle him up on my bed all night but we've worked so hard to get here.

I told Dh he'd need to be a little late for work as I feel so ill I needed to go and get Gp appt. You need to be at surgery for doors opening at 7.30am. I got there and apparently it's 8am on a Wednesday! Great! I got an appt tho and I've a chest and ear infection. My tonsils are OK just inflamed no pus just now. Got antibiotics. Kids are in nursery now. Mil will collect J at 11.30am and keep him til I go to get dd at 3.30pm. Ugh. Back to bed but I feel so Yuck.

Poor old you flouncy

Keep going vq in order to "mummy" you need sleep as well because you need to be healthy an well rested or you get run down and I'll and can't function. As always for that interview they chose two strong, passionate characters at opposite ends of the spectrum , real life is about balance. You need to live your life within healthy limits.

Which I have just blatantly pinched from something I read this morning.

flouncy big hugs, hope the Ab's do their thing quickly for you.
I am also one that struggles with sleep training. We did one night of cry it out - after 2 hours of screaming we gave up and sat with him. He really isn't the sort of baby who will give up and go to sleep. I feel much more comfortable with the gradual retreat we have done and it seems to have worked for us with very little crying at all.
But as much as I am in the attachment parenting camp to some extent, I also from experience know how when at the end of your tether and sleep deprived you will try anything to get some sleep!

Thank you that makes sense.

Poor Flouncy (((hug)))

vq I think that you can take bits from various types of parenting methods and adapt to suit you/DC. Peaches was passionate about and v firmly in the attachment parenting camp and it worked for her. Others in the quiche are also in that camp. Others are Gina Fording it and that works for them. I don't think any particular method is absolutely right and you kind of have to pick and choose what works.

Lololol PR

I made my own camp, probably bit of lots of strategies pinned together. It works for L and I but probably not for other babies. I also have to alter it depending on the teeth/desperation anxiety situation.

He was left howling at nursery this morning apparently. I hate those days as I feel guilty all day.

I am in camp 'haven't a fucking clue so I'll just make it up as I go along'.

Sorry you are poorly flouncy

You are welcome for tea vq!!

I will let you recover a bit first Pass

I was a brutal GF mum with DD1, an adapted version with DD2 as she had to fit in with DD1, but with boy child, I am as soft as putty. I guess it is because he has not had it easy, and I did what I needed to do to get as much sleep as possible.

Wise words as usual quiche, thank you (slaps self gently with fish)

I am a 'routine' mum, I need to have a routine in order to function properly. Not as strict as Gina ford but not a softie either. O loves routine as well, she likes to know what will happen.

flouncy poor you! hope you are back in bed. ((Hugs))

Bad night, possible accidental ingestion of soya. Think I got 4ish hours sleep?

Nothing helpful to add, so will share my

Oh dear BP. What do you think happened? J nearly got kissed by a chocolate covered sibling yesterday, and this morning had his Koko snatched back as I could not remember which carton I had poured it out of. Perhaps having the Koko next to the regular milk is not such a good idea.

Slings and reusable nappies should put me firmly in the AP camp but, actually, you parent the baby you have not the one the books tell you you should have. R loves his routine and I go with that, even though I would be happy to let him crash where he landed when he was tired but it doesn't work for him.

Lovely morning in the sun. Went to the market and supported lots of local cheap traders then park :o he's now chatting to himself in his cot while I contemplate hanging out laundry

Sorry to hear that bp

P was handed two boxes of miniature Lindt chocolate bunnies at the family gathering recently. She went immediately bonkers - how does she even know what they contain?

I have just had one while she naps. I figure it's my duty to protect her from such things.

And I am working so the calories don't count.

We wing it too - I have to confess to reading no parenting books other than 'French children don't throw food' and a few pages of 'she who must not be named' in (one of her maaaaany!) second hand books being flogged at the Jack and Jill sale. I've always said I'd not take advice from someone who has no kids and slept in her Mum's bed til 15 and reading a few pages made me realise she'd not met my son! I'm not anti routine but I'm not keen on baby boot camp either nor any expert who says only their way is right.

We have a set routine in terms of a rough order of things but timings fit round how long he slept in and what I've got on in a day. I hate the term attachment parenting as all parents are attached to their kids but I suppose we're more attachment parenting than the sleep training school in that what I've heard about cortisone levels, attachment disorders etc puts me off and letting him cry inconsolably just flares up his reflux anyway so unless I want to leave him crying in pain its not for us.

TBH I've never needed to let him cry as he's easy to settle and sleeps well UNLESS he's eaten something he shouldn't have. Watching the quiche sleep dodgers be tamed by excluding cows milk after failed attempts at sleep training has convinced me that with any child I'd cut allergens out of their / my diet asap instead. Hopefully this would mean there'd be no need to consider CC or CIO as bad "oh god I'll do anything to sleep" habits wouldn't have needed to be established. It's only because of my sister that we recognised J's symptoms super early (7 weeks) otherwise am sure we'd have been comfort feeding to sleep / cosleeping/ doing ANYTHING to sleep now months later - and given he's a stubborn bugger god knows how we'd have got him out of our bed. I'd probably be in his cot by now! We probably would have had to train him if we'd not got him treated early.

I wish HVs were better trained on this getting parents to consider diet before spouting the 1950s combative parent vs child crap "they're just trying to manipulate you", or as it turns out oftentimes they're in pain - manipulative little monkeys eh wanting comfort from pain after bedtime, how very dare they?

YW you so right. When I thought yep I need to train was actually after the cows milk introduction and before you all helped me put 10 and 10 together! Now I know to trust my instincts more about what is right

And I certainly won't be introducing cows milk to any other LO I am lucky enough to have straight away.