Dec 08 - The One where they take on the world (school)

[DeidreBarlow]

New thread

He emailed the guy (sort of knows him) over there yesterday for all the details and he replied he was "out on the lash" and would get back to him today. dear God.

How's the foot Deids?

Rubes, such a big move for just a year. I hope the guy does come up with the details soon so you can think it over properly. DH told me the day before we exchanged that he had been approached by a headhunter in connection with a good opportunity but it is about 25 miles away. I'm not keen to move DD again so soon after the traumatic time she had last time but then we would be back to DH working his stupid hours with a commute on top. I think I've talked him out of it but we'll see. Their careers are important, I know, but so is family life.

The foot...I did the shred DVD this morning and have just made it 100 times worse. Nearly passed out during a jumping jack! O lord the pain. Its my own fault. I think I need to do zero impact activity on it till its pain free. I am such an idiot. I may go to the Drs on Monday but till then need to follow the RICE treatment I reckon.

That's a big move Rubes for one year...would it defo be just a year or is it at all likely he would get another job and then stay out their longer?

Deids, please take it easy on the foot!

Rubes, I don't think I expressed myself v well. What I was getting that I was stressing over a potential move of 25 miles while you might be moving to the other side of the world.

I wonder what that message said.

Arti, it was my DD1 who had impetigo, but hers was pretty mild. She still has a couple of little patches on her body, which didnt clear up with the antibiotics, but they don't seem to be spreading or getting worse. Have you been to the OOH doctor?

Rubes, wow. Must say my initial reaction is that its a hell of an upheaval for just a year...

I am officially Pamela Anderson today and along with arrival of milk, comes hormones. Sob! Oh and jaundice for DD3. Just mild though.

Ooo. Random deleted message in our thread wonder what it said!!!

Ooooh a dodgy poster!

Re the job, no that's just the thing - he wouldn't want to stay on and look for another job, as the system in place over there is that anyone who is overseas trained cannot be given a medicare provider number until fulfilling usually 10 years working in an area of need aka the '10 year moratorium requirement' there are loopholes and possibilities to shorten the length of time, however it seems complicated and not sure if this particular fellowship would cut down on some of that, but the short of it is, he would be basically be already set up here to go straight into private, rather than a huge drop in earnings after slogging it out for so many years of study, and then get behind as he would not be keeping up with all the advanced stuff, out in the boondocks, and as he calls it, would be committing career suicide. Of course things are changing all the time, and there are probably loopholes, but I think it would be a gamble, because basically Australia just looks after it's own in this subject.
He's back at work again over night tonight, but hopefully have heard more details and have a better idea.
And very true - it's major upheaval for only a year. I have a cons list a mile long before we even know the details!

urgh, I don't miss the massive tight boob thing either..... My 2 both had jaundice too. It's almost the norm these days. Hardly the weather to stick her in the sun either.

Deids, hope the foot is on the mend. Will ask DH tomorrow if he can shed any light when he gets home.
We went for a end of school week drink at the pub yesterday then on to Zizi for food - both dcs ate massively as they were so hungry after their busy week I think. We walked home and I was busting for a wee so dh told me to run on ahead. I half ran in heeled boots and could feel the leg sore again. Hoping it's not a set back and only due to it being not warmed up and awful footwear!

Oooh dh forwarding email info re job

Oh lord. I have so much more milk than Tory can possibly handle. Worried about mastitis. Have tried hand expressing, but can't get enough out. Did some electric expressing this morning, which helped a bit, but think I'll have to do a ton more. Just had a 2hr sleep. Hoping I will be a bit nicer now. DH taken DDs1&2 to soft play. Will be v kind to them on return.

Arti, how is DD1? Did you find you we're entirely wrapped up in new DC when he arrived and then felt bad for ignoring the others. I'm finding I'm even getting irritated with them. Poor little things. But am trying to make sure I hug them a lot. DD1 has asked why I'm not playing with them or taking them to school any more. Think we will do a family trip next week!

Aw Beans. I was so painfully e gorged this time. Cold cabbage leaves straight from the fridge and in my bra really helped. It was horrid so I really feel for you. And cues I did find my other two an irritating distraction when DS arrived and I did feel bad. To be honest that is only just rectifying itself. I think your hormones programme you to be all about the baby. It takes a while for everything to settle down but it really does settle down and feel great after a bit.

Both DDs saw the OOH's GP who said they had some of the most virulent impetigo he had ever seen. They are both on two types of oral antibiotics plus a topical antibiotic and they can't go to school. Total nightmare as DD2 just settling in and this might really set her back. There go my plans to see the Pompeii exhibition this week. I do feel for them though, they both look awful.

Beans, that cheered me. Sorry I got a big chuckle over the Pamela esque boobs. Not fun for you I know.

Artiiiii hope dd improves quick. Poor thing and such bad timing. Hope the Au pair improves quick too!

Vag, where are you. I need a pep talk. I need some of your strength to get my head around things that you seem to manage effortlessly.
Not sure if it's a whole lifetime in my job with a transient lifestyle, but I'm kind if sick of it. And we may be off again. I know I need to go with what's best - I think Its just the bad timing as I'm uncertain about lots things, straight after thinking things were falling into place. My brother hasn't talked to me since we fell out 6 weeks ago either. Not helping.

Right might have to have wine and put another call into the parentals since dh at work again.

Ahh Rubes honey! Have a . It's a lot to get your head round & I hadn't realised your bro still not speaking to you either

What is DHs gut feeling about it? I'm a lot of an ignoramus tbh, would it be a massive boost for his career if he went? Or is it just a fantastic opportunity? I guess I'm asking what the good points are. I know you said you had a list of negatives do what are the positives?

It does sound unsettling Rubes. If it wasn't your home country would you even consider it? I mean are there pros beyond the chance to go back near your friends and fam for a year?

Update on au pair: she's been quite good with the girls for the last day or two (I havent attwmpted to get her to interact with DS again). All good. But she is so very young and innocent. Today she went into Oxford Street and came home excited as anything because a "really friendly" English man had bought her a coffee and said he would help her improve her English. She kept saying nobody would be so friendly in her village and not seeming to even consider he might have had other plans than language tuition. Apparently he lives in Soho (who the heck actually lives in Soho?) and has invited her to practise her language skills tomorrow. Hmmmm. DH wants me to have a word but I'm sure she can't be totally naive and is it really our business and what on earth would I say?

Arti dont you have to act as in loco parentis? I would say to her can you imagine if something happened. I think unfortunately some girls are just naive.

Rubes what a confusing time. Does it mean put your house purchase on hold etc? What about school? Gosh so many questions. I always said I would be happy to do a yr somewhere but I would have to make sure that our house would still be here for us on our return and that the boys still had a place at school.

dh has been at work all day and overnight but have spoken a tiny bit on the phone. My fear is he's too optimistic about being able to do it but also go ahead with the house etc, and rent it out. He also assumed that the school would hold their places but I'm thinking they wouldn't? I mean, a 5 year old hardly goes off on a "career break" does he, but then again, I may be wrong and if they would then that would be helpful and make more sense going ahead with the house purchase. Then there's the cars - we'd sell one, and take the other over - there are fees involved but it would be worth triple what it is here so could sell it at the end. There's also my dog, and she would be coming, which means costs for her including 30 days quarantine which I will find hard (although we do go away up to 3 weeks sometimes and she's in the kennels but still.

Yes Arti, it isn't really much to do with it being my home country - that's just a bonus I guess - or not as I said I don't know how I'll feel coming back here, but then again most friends who have moved home for good have wished they didn't. I am not from Sydney and don't really know anyone there, so from that point of view it would be not much benefit, although I would see more of my parents as they'd come and stay much much more. It's a very very good fellowship for dh and they aren't often handed on a silver platter like that, and yes would be very good for him career-wise.
It would also mean losing 50% income plus my job so piddily income there but also flights. He's talking about coming back on annual leave to work and concentrated week at his other job then take the work back etc as after he sees clients it's all done via internet, but I think he's a little optimistic about that. The wage there would cover living costs, but if anything went tits up with tenants over here it would be a hassle and there's no contingency - I guess Vag is doing the same but, if we go and didn't buy this house, we'd have to move in November and then move again when the job in Aus starts.
Anyway, I'm 3/4 way through a bottle of wine and dh had to go as he's busy but said we'll talk about it all tomorrow. Trouble is, we've got time before it stars, but not much time to decide yay or nay.

Arti, I'd be a bit nervous of the friendly English guy [eek] I say have a word.

Just said to DH about it Rubes his response. Its a yr its not forever. Maybe thats just blokes mentality but if you look at it like that a yr is not that long.

The LA would have to find the DC a spot at school on return.

You could rent out the house.

The quarantine for the dog is a bummer but arent those places normally somewhere you can still visit and hang out with the pooch.

Could you transfer to Virgin Oz or ask for a sabbatical so you can come back to it.

Yes Sydney is pricey but think of the fun lifestyle you could have for a yr the climate all the lovely outdoorsy stuff that you all enjoy.

The no MIL for a yr.

Yes there are good points and it's not a long time but still long enough to be really hard to leave as I haven't lived at home since 1999.
No on the airline thing. I'm just a number. In rare cases they give career breaks but you lose all seniority and have to basically start again. They just let you avoid interview. It wouldn't be worth it. No I'd be done. Wouldn't bother trying to work on the ground in Aust as I'd have to find something in school ish hours as paying for childcare not an option. Plus it's pricey there.
The school doesn't have to give a place at the same school though do they? That'd be good but guessing not. Ours is badly oversubscribed and we got it on waiting list but guess it would come up.
It's really more about whether we could weather the financial hit. Nothing at all could go wrong with renting the houses and tenants which is a long shot as we'd be screwed as only be able to tread water in Aust. With dh talking about flying back in his annual leave to work here, it kind of takes the fun holidays out of the equation.
I probably sound quite negative which us probably did since it's my home, but we know we would want to go eventually ie to retire but not go and come back so it's hard to get my head around so suddenly when we're still knee high in mortgage applications and dh changing jobs in a week or so, and he tends to be quite optimistic about money and back up plans and so I feel like I have to think if everything.

Urgh. My head is spinning! I'm just going to stay neutral and let DH make an educated decision. Otherwise I'd regret swaying him one way or another.

Give it 24hrs see what happens when you can talk to DH one to one in person.

Jam when he said its a year it's not forever, it sounds like he's got the wrong issue. I'm not worried about leaving the uk for a year, but more worried about going home and then having to leave again to come back here. Might be desperate to! Who knows.

I meant wrong idea of what's worrying me, not issue.

Sorry thats me not relaying it correctly. I see what you mean.

Hmm. V tough Rubes. I can see pros and cons. A friend from here has done the same thing. If it helps, they are loving it! 3 boys from your DS1's age and up.

Have had a good night so far. DD3 fed and slept, so have only been up twice at 3 and now. Not baaaaad.

I got some hydro cortisone pile stuff from GP. Working a treat already. And I managed a small poo earlier. Phew.