Still brooking no argument for sleep, glorious sleep!

[Stacks]

This will be the thread where all brooking babies learn to self settle and sleep through the night (the real version, not that 5hr at a time thing).

another toughish morning here. my bestie was ment to be coming over this morning but luckily for me she's having a disaster herself. I say luckily not because I didnt want to see her but because I've only just got N settled and am working on getting myself washed and dressed. I'm back on antibiotics as my infection hasnt gone its tough because they have advised me to have 2 baths a day in milk/lavender and teatree oil. so really I need a shower too as I can't have shower gel etc on the area so can't really wash in the bath. I'm finding it hard to get the time to wash and eat. eating I wasn't so bothered about but i have to now with the tablets. I thought I was clever this morning setting an alarm for 8.30 giving myself an hour before his feed to get ready, he had other ideas and woke up screaming minutes before. he has only recently stopped and gone to sleep. it took me until 7am to get him fed and settled after his 5.30 feed, I should have got up then .
sweetie how long do e and f take over their feeds? n can take over an hour to drink his milk.
I know no one has a rountine yet but what are you all doing? I hate leaving him to cry too much but I have to at least eat. me washing in the morning is way down on my prioritys, if I have to wait until the evening so be it. I can't really take him in the bathroom with me there's no space. its a shower over the bath so could get splashed with hot water and he would be right next to the radiator where he could over heat or burn himself. nothing seems to calm him much. his bouncy chair only works for a short time, he is a bit too little for it anyway so I have to watch him so he doesn't slip out especially because the head hugger but isn't attached. its just the fabric that sort of grips to its self a bit, you know the kind that attracts loads of fluff and dust. toys and books don't really work either neither does his play mat he can be interested for a couple of min and then just scream. he will eventually sleep if I hold him and rock him or if I take him for a walk. his next feed is due at 1pm but I think there's a chance he will go longer now because he spent all morning screaming. Im trying to make sure I get as much sleep as poss with out napping during the day although I'm thinking now I may just have to get ready after his early morning feed even if that is 6am ish.

Oh trix its sounding tough. We had an awful night, DH was so tired after all the winding he slept through Z's 6:00 feed!! We have no routine but I am keeping track so hoping to see a little pattern.

How does everyone manage once their DPs have gone back to work? My guilt factor is off the scale!!

oh bumpie I'm not gunna lie. it was horrible the first day. both me and N cried most of the day. I didn't get dressed eventually he went to sleep at 3.30pm and my mum came and sat with him while I went back to bed for a bit. was ment to go out and didn't. but that was the worst now its not so bad. im slowly learning and getting more used to it. don't get me wrong though sometimes my mum still comes and sits with him while I get washed and have some food then she usually gets us out of the house. N is 4wks old and I still have taken him further than a walk round the block by myself. not even gone to the corner shop!
I must admit that I sometimes give dh evils when he's fast asleep and I'm struggling to stay awake whilst feeding N.
but I'm sure you will do much better than me! I was dreading dh going back to work but actually I was ok. it wasn't as bad as I thought (after the first day I think N was testing me!)
if all else fails shove z in the pram the ladies here all told me that was the best thing to do and they were right.

bumpie mymum came for a few days when dh went back to work

trix how about smaller more frequent bottles, that sounds a long time for a feed maybe he's not wanting that much? s fed v often at that age

trix I often don't wash promise it gets easier as they can watch mobile etc for a while. for now just muddle through. why do you think he's crying, wind?

bumpie in the early days bf takes a lot of time! get easy food for lunch. make sure you eat and drink enough. don't aim for anything above feeding and changing him.

who asked about routine? at 12 weeks we have a bedtime one but days are flexible, which is how o like it though.

dh is convinced its not wind but I'm not so sure. he doesnt want me to give N infacol or anything. but its alright for dh because its not him who has to deal with a screaming baby.
I'm trying out the bicycle legs but its hard because he doesn't stop screaming and kicking his legs about.

try lying him along your forearm with hand pressing into tummy, head in crook of elbow. just walk round jiggling. what does he think it is? I agree, it's not him dealing with n. is it all day or specific times? after feeds? I'd try the infacol if he has no other suggestions...

does he vomit up feeds or seem in pain after feeds, esp if you lie him flat?

sweetie do you still think e might have reflux?

he voms some times but not everytime. I think more often than not he seems in pain.

Google reflux or silent reflux. poor little man. if you think it's that the gp can give medication and you also keep them upright after feeds

had a quick look, it does seem like reflux. in the past hour he has sipped down 2oz and seems to have fallen asleep now. I tried winding him more often taking the bottle away whenever he'd stoped for a while or was just sucking but not drinking. he screamed everytime I took it away. I'm sure he wasn't this bad when I fed him every 4hours even if it ment I woke him

how long has it been since he ate last?

make an appointment to see the gp tomorrow, they give babies quick appointments

Trix, do you have a sling? DD was terribly refluxy and it was the only thing that kept her (and me!) happy. After feeds I often kept her in it while doing things around the house or going for a walk - it made it a lot better. Also, elevating the head end of the cot/moses basket helps - so they're laying at an angle rather than flat if you see what I mean. Books under the mattress works well!

Bumpie, glad to hear you're doing well with the bf! Re your first day without DH, my best advice would be to be prepared! Make sure you have all your remotes, drinks and snacks to hand If you can prepare a sandwich the night before that's excellent, so you can just grab it at lunchtime... if you can get DH to make it for you that's even better!

Hope you and S are well keep?

Sorry for reading and writing and running (and sorry if I've repeated advice that's already been said!) - DD is watching Spider in the Bath on the other half of the screen so I have very limited MN time!

keep he fed at approx 9.30am took until nearly mid day to be fed and settled. he slept until about 2.30 he has only just maybe 20min ago settled to sleep. he's only been having an average of 3oz per feed yesterday and today sometimes more some times less.
musical haven't got a sling, didnt really think we needed it. now I am reconsidering.
oh he's crying again

when did he last get weighed? is he putting on weight OK? how much total is he taking per 24 hours vs what he should be? poor you. do see the gp. I saw my friend this morning who's dd has reflux. medicine has made a big difference

Trix DTs drink their bottles very quickly, only about 15 mins for 5oz. In fact we have to slow E down as if she drinks too quick she sicks most of it back up. I had thought it was reflux but think it was more greed, it only has happened a few times and not at all since we make her have more breaks for winding. I would have a word with the HV or even GP about getting N something as it doesn't sound right.

Bumpie my Mum came around when DH went back to work too. I think being prepared is the best advice, get everything ready the night before. I would try to get snacks, drinks, lunch etc ready in advance also have your shower/bath in the evening when DH can watch Z.

We have quite a good feeding routine (every 4 hours) and DH helps out when he is here and in the night. But we don't have naps sorted yet but I aren't worried as DTs sleep well at night between feeds. Long may this continue.

Mmmm, looks like I need to bed down for the day on monday! mum live two hours away and everyone I know in this town is either heavily pg or has a nb!!!

ah, we will get by!

you will be ok bumpie, you'll amaze your self.
I'm in the bath incase I don't get a chance later, hopefully I will get back to sleep for a bit after though.
N had a walk in the pram at 9pm he then slept till 11.30pm. dh reckons I'm not always shoving the bottle in far enough so tried that and some infacol. he's fed and settled much better on his last two feeds. he's still sicking some not loads but more than I would assume possetting is.
I think I will phone the hv first thing and if they are useless take him to the doc.

dh also thinks I make him too comfortable when feeding so not sure if it the diff feeding technique or the infacol that's helped.

Trix, hope you don't mind me saying but your DH seems to have a lot of opinions, is at home all the time with N too? If not then I personally would listen to your gut and do what you think is right and what seems to help N and if you have any concerns, speak to a hv. My ds1 had and still has reflux (now 3) so I can always answer any questions, but IME most parents who think they have a reflux baby just aren't winding them enough or hard enough. A very good friend of mine I discovered wasn't even winding her child as she was worried about hurting the baby. If N has wind, maybe give him 1/3rd the bottle, then wind, give another 1/3 and wind, then the final third and wind. Some babies can cope with a whole bottle before needing to be winded, but my ds1 definitely couldn't cope with that much pressure in his stomach. Also would not lie down in the day for a sleep as was in pain, and used to scream a lot at night. Infacol didn't help. Best thing was gripe water mixed in with some cooled boiled water, but I think they need to be 1 month old before they can have it.

sweetie are they more awake in the day now? are you enjoying playing with them? it's lovely once they start smiling.

we are well thanks musical, getting the hang of things slowly... she is very gorgeous, chatty and sunny personality

loopy not at all! he is not here all day. at times he's given N back to me when he's been struggling with him. although more recently N has been better with dh than me probably because because he knows im stressed, babies can tell can't they.
the health visitor said its not reflux because its not every feed and hes not so bad at night. so on second thought I think you are right. I do try and wind N regularily through out his feed but he doesn't always make it easy he screams and pushes his feet off my legs so I can't sit him in the right position very easily. sometimes I end up giving up and assuming he doesn't need a burp and that he's screaming purely because he's hungry and I've taken the bottle away. but is it actually because he's uncomfortable with wind? he does burp and sometimes without me even having to help him but perhaps its not enough. I find sitting him on my knee and leaning him forward patting his back better than putting him over my shoulder (when he stops wriggling and screaming anyway) bicycle legs is a struggle too.

trix. have you tried this www.youtube.com/watch?v=SeWWobEAJKc ?? I find Z loves it. I will post the link on fb too.

Z doesn't wind very easily either!! xx

with bf there are positions that get less wind. maybe the same for a bottle? glad it's not reflux x