Holy shit katie! That sounds horrendous. Scammers are very much more sophisticated than they used to be and, as an academic it is possible she has been targeted specifically. My DH was telling me about a scam which is targeted towards foreign students studying in the UK. It is a fake conference aimed at students who speak English as their second language. All looks very legit with claims of being highly daughter after within academia. You need to pay a deposit though. The doctoral students who fitted the criteria were specifically targeted by name.
Anyway, I hope she is ok. I would think the embarassment will be worse in many ways than the loss of cash. I totally understand your feelings of worry and anger. Get yourself some dinner and try to take it easy.
kyz poor E. that sounds awful. Poor you as well. As though you need anything else to cope with.
BP DH is easily bought by providing him with craft lagers and the promise of a stroke of pussypig