March 2013: Smiles, sleep & excellent feeding.....the thread of wishful thinking!

[SoYo]

Well we may as well start the thread on a positive note before the grumbling about the little darlings begins!!!

[StormyBrid]

You might be alright if it's just a stud. I'm anticipating some painful moments in the future though, because four of my seven piercings are rings, and one's a 14mm flesh tunnel - perfect size for DD's little hands to grab!

We haven't had a really bad day of milk in a while. Last weekend was just over 20 ounces each day, so not great, 20th and 21st of May were both 19 ounces, but otherwise we've been clearing 21 at least each day. 26 yesterday, which sounds brilliant, but we did have to feed six times during the day and twice at night for that. That said, six feeds a day fits in with DD's lack of napping schedule, so it's working alright at the moment. Averaging 23 ounces a day, which is less than the box and her weight would indicate, but not by enough to have me really worrying. Her dad's an infuriatingly skinny bugger, so she may well be taking after him (which is great, if it means she doesn't inherit my arse).

[vjhist85]

Well DD's still happily plodding along in th 0.4th centile. Which I know is fine, but her being so little still worries me as I feel we don't have much of a buffer iykwim.

Our HV is of the chocolate teapot variety. Re: napping resistance "make sure she's tired before putting her down". Really? You get paid to give out that advice? And re: green poo, the old faithful "if you're still worried go to the gp".

Today I am cross. Cross that dd is so tired/screamy/nap resistant, cross that today will be like every single other day, including weekends, and the fact i get no break from the tedium, cross with breastfeeding and the lack of freedom, cross that DH does absolutely nothing, and cross with myself for being so f***g grumpy!

And breathe. Even the sunshine isn't cheering me up.

[Rainbowbabyhope]

Must admit I admire the work those of you who ff put in to feeding your little ones - sterlising, preparing bottles, heating milk, leaky bottles, different teats, having to worry about amounts eaten etc. Couldn't imagine having to do all that on top of everything else! No one can suggest ff is the easier of the two options!

For those of you thinking about buying bits for weaning there are some lovely bowls and spoons in natural materials like birch which are apparently brilliant. As soon as dd can sit up we intend to make sure she sits for three meals a day with us at the table and we will place the bowl and spoon in front of her to encorage her to copy and then be lead by her as to when she is actually ready to try real food!

[StormyBrid]

Yes, Rainbow, but we can eat what we like, we don't have to worry about getting our boobs out in public, no supply issues to worry about, we can have a break while someone else does the feeds, and we can get more sleep. So it's swings and roundabouts really. And sterilising's a doddle, we just chuck the stuff in the microwave.

Speaking of microwaves, I just heated milk in there in front of the health visitor. Her face was a picture.

vj best I can suggest is bugger off out for the weekend and leave the baby with your man. Although it's really not the same as getting a break at home. While it's a bugger in terms of cashflow, I'm glad mine's been off work for five out of the last six weeks - it's a hell of a lot easier having two of us around. Really reduces the stress (which was particularly important when getting two ounces down DD felt like a triumph). And it means he knows what it's like being on duty all day so he's not likely to think I'm slacking and sitting on my arseall day.

[zigwig]

I'm glad to hear everyone's babies seem to be on the up. Eig the 12 week jab might not be as bad as you think. It was a few minutes screaming whilst being stabbed and a small lump for about a week, that was it, no bad side effects this time which was great.

Just been reading a good book about weaning, it sounds really similar to the annabel karmel (if I got the name right) one. I think the idea of the baby rice is more for the texture than the nutrition. To get them used to solid food without a taste overload. At least that's what the book made it sound like. Someone more in the know than me already bought us one of those plastic food catching type bibs so seeing it recommended here too makes me think that may be a necessity. I'm going to leave weaning as close to six months as is practical as we've had enough digestive issues here already so I don't want to rush him. If he seems like he's ready a bit earlier though I'll start introducing plain things.

Uh oh would appear nap time is over..

[KFFOREVER]

Just back from baby massage and i have 'the guilt' as all the women whipped their boobs out when their dc's were hungry. other than that it went well and ds had a nice nap after.

rainbow sterilising etc is the consequence punishment of not bf. However as stormy said it means others can feed and i get to see how much ds feeds.

Re: weaning. I will have to wait and see. They say every baby is different. So far everything i said i would do and wouldnt do has become the opposite. I guess ds didnt read my list of things i would do.

[vjhist85]

Unfortunately I'm my own worst enemy, and the control freak in me really struggles with the idea of leaving dd with DH for too long. Interesting that I'm fine with my mum having her though- think DH and I are a dangerous combination of control freak do-er and lazy any excuse not to do-er. I take over and he lets me. Rod, meet Back.

First day attempting wake to sleep for naps... We're at an hour for this nap and still going! Not sure if that's anything I've done or just because she's totally exhausted after the weekend, although exhaustion doesn't usually make a difference. Anyone else had success? If this is the solution then I'm one very happy mummy! (In contrast to my last grump-fest of a post, amazing what difference a coffee, lunch and sleeping baby can make!

[StormyBrid]

vj we tried the wake to sleep thing once last week. The next two days, she had a decent length nap over lunchtime (two hours!). Since then it's all been 45 minutes. So we may have to persist a bit. And she's squeaking now. Bugger!

[vjhist85]

Still going! Longest unassisted nap in cot ever! And we're meant to be going out soon! Typical!

[plonko]

Vj that's awesome! And you know this is the safest place ever to rant, right? just don't mention controlled crying Glad you're feeling calmer.


Rainbow between dishwashers and microwave sterilisers, ff is soooo much easier than bf. except that I washed all bottles in the same load as a pan covered in tomato sauce, so they're now orange. Live the sound of those weaning bowls but how does one sterilise wood? I think we'll try a similar weaning method in that when I have breakfast and lunch he'll get a dollop on his highchair tray to pick at/run through his hair/choke on.

[worsestershiresauce]

Arghhhh, can I just vent?! Gorgeous sunny day, and DH is at home, which means all the sodding doors are open and the house is full of bluebottles. If there is one thing I can't stand it's 50 of the things head butting the window behind me, and I can't get the spray out for fear of poisoning the tiny person.

And breathe....

Dinner was the best thanks - proper food, hot, no burnt bits, conversation and cutlery. Quite the novelty. I even kept my boobs under wraps, and that never happens. DH was either thrilled or disappointed, it's hard to say . Best bit, I didn't have to worry about the tiddler as I have the best sitter on the planet. Friend's daughter, works at the local montessori nursery. It's fair to say she knows more about that babies than I do not hard. Arrived home (sober, sadly.... but still bf-ing so thems the rules) to find mini-worse looking happy, in a clean nappy, and all milk drunk. Cool.

Ah, the whole bf v ff faff factor debate. Can I contribute? (what with me being either indecisive or flexible.... you decide.... and doing both). Night feeds boobs win every time. Pick 'em up, latch 'em on, lie down and have a snooze. Not so much a chore as a nice cuddle. Boobs also tip the scales on trips out, as frankly who wants to worry about bottles, hot water and temperatures when travelling. However, if you want a good night's sleep there is nothing like a big bottle of sedative formula to zonk 'em out, and if you are in a hurry there is a lot to be said for getting a feed done and dusted in half an hour rather than faffing about for up to 90 mins (or is that just worse-junior being lazy?). So there you have it ladies.... the winner is.... ta daaahhhhhh.... Both !!!

Eig and Pud I'm so glad your littlies are home and doing well. I have been worrying away on your behalf... although it's probably fair to say you've been doing more than enough worrying yourselves without some internet random jumping on the band wagon. Seriously though, just really happy for you.

VJ - that nap sounds awesome. You do realise she is only doing it to be inconvenient don't you? I'm telling you babies know . DD absolutely does. Any day I need to go out she makes d*mn sure not to eat her breakfast, just so as she can scream starvation the second we leave. It's fun you know.... trying to break your mummy. As for not wanting to leave mini-vj with your DH, just do it. He'll be fine. Nothing like a bit of responsibility to make a bloke pull his finger out. Worst that can happen is she'll teach him a valuable lesson in what happens if you don't pander to her needs. That's a great lesson for dads to learn...

Speaking of needs, some one here has decided she needs her afternoon snack. Like now.

[vjhist85]

I reckon that with bf v. ff ease, the first 12 weeks or so ff is much easier despite the sterilising etc. others can help so you can recover, you quickly get those longer gaps between feeds, you (usually-sorry stormy!) get peace of mind knowing how much they're taking. I know that for the first 9 weeks every day was a fight in my head to continue (I'll just do one more day. I'll just get to 8 weeks. I'll just wait til she's sleeping better")

Now, the whip it out and plug her in thing seems so easy, although we've discovered she doesn't like eating in a breeze so outdoor feeding isn't that easy! It's also nice as a fall back if she's crying and nothing else works. And although we always have an emergency bottle with us when we go out, I like being able to go over to my mums for the whole day and take only nappy changing stuff!

I agree- the winner is both! Pros and cons, I'm quite enjoying mixed feeding and think it will probably allow me to bf for longer as I'm not getting quite as fed up with it as I would be if I was ebf.

We haven't managed any more wake to sleep experiments today as we've been out and about, and the last nap of the day we tend to have together cuddling before bath and bedtime starts. More research tomorrow though!

You're right, I must let DH just get on with it. I know he'd do brilliantly and probably even tidy up a bit just to prove a point and shut me up with my moaning, and we all need to get used to it with kit days coming up, it's difficult for him as he's away a lot so his learning curve has been slower than it would have been if he were around all the time.

[Rainbowbabyhope]

Well I admire you ff ladies anyway! Bf for me now is just so easy. Feeds on 5-10 mins long and perfect temp food from automatically sterile tap day and night. She sleeps well generally (and would never use that as a reson for giving ff anyway) and I have absolutely no inclination to leave my little one under the care of anyone else anyway for any longer than it takes her to get hungry so works well for us. Thinking about the alternative just made me appreciate how more fuss ff would be for us and new respect for those of you who do it on a daily basis!

[ecofreckle]

Hello ladies. Am sat in sun on holiday in peak district :-) I waved as we passed matlock plonko (if you get bored this week we could have a coffee). After doling advice out (to vj?) about coping with babies on car journey we had a stinker. Traffic jam and wailing, not for food just BECAUSE. But here now and sunny.
Nice to catch up with your news. Well babies back at home! Lovely news. Worc I agree with you about relative merits of ff and bf although only academically because dd still won't take bottle. But if she did I'd be happy with boob when out and about as am lazy cow and delighted with delegating a night feed or two to dh. The stuff of my dreams.
It's with interest that I read your posts as it's a peek into future with my end of march baby. I'm getting the boob fussiness, no poo for days and then an atrocious mess (today in Sainsbury which saw me holding a yellow/green stained baby at arms length across the shop much to shoppers disgust) and green poo.
Glad some of you enjoying wonder weeks and that you found suggestion useful. I'm liking the suggestions of activities to try. This has resulted in luminous ribbon tied around limbs for pre bed play which looks bit random.
We went to a national trust place today and I did my first lying down outdoor feed. Boob out on blanket baby wriggling over to it to chow down, dh reading newspaper. Does that gain me Hippy points? It felt lovely in sun and actually more discreet than sitting. Just looked like we were napping.
Dd now asleep and it's my turn to cook. I have at least four hours before next feed. Is one glass of wine all I can get away with... It's all I've dared do so far.
Hope quiet this eve from you ladies because babes are all being model citizens.

[worsestershiresauce]

Eco - what a simply perfect day out. Hope the sun continues to shine and you get many more of them.

Am currently scraping myself up from a soppy mummy puddle on the floor. The tiddler has fallen in love with her pink teddy. She giggles when she sees him, and has just spent 10 mins grasping him in both hands looking him in the face, cooing away in a very serious manner. Awwwww... The more they do the cuter they get.

Rainbow 5-10 min feeds? You're luckier than me. Anything less than 20 and she's hungry again within the hour. It takes an hour to get her properly full. V slow my little lady.

[ecofreckle]

wors sounds very sweet! Hope you have two of the pink bears if it becomes a favourite. Do you now let her have it in the cot with her? We have loads of cuddly stuff but not put anything in with her yet. Moses basket looks barren! We too only feed for max ten mins. Maybe that's why we have green poo. But it's always been that way so maybe that's just dd's way. Sometimes when I'm desperate for a sit down/bit of telly I'd love half an hour of peace to cuddle suckling baby but it never happens! We always want what we don't have eh?!

[SoYo]

Eco I'm a 2 glass girl 1 was my rule in pregnancy so indulge!

Stormy MiniYo did indeed to back to sleep, until 6.30 then in with me until 8! Amazing night.

The jabs were much better than last time so far 30 secs screaming then nothing untoward since. 1 gave 2.5ml calpol 30mins before again.

We've had a lovely day here. Walks in the sunshine, went to a friends & then playing in the garden. Beautiful weather here. I've just changed her to the pushchair bit of her pram & she's definitely enjoying seeing more & still naps in it as well.

In other news, we've booked a holiday! On Saturday we're off to Cornwall for a week with MiniYo, PuppyMonster & all the gear that comes with them. We won't have to wedge the steriliser in though, madam is still a bottle refuser & I've given it up as a bad job so it's portaboob all the way here.

[StormyBrid]

Wish I was going with you to Cornwall, SoYo. Normally go two or three times a year to visit my sister, but there's nowhere suitable for DD to sleep. Whereabouts are you going?

Gloriously sunny day here too. The man randomly decided to take the baby out for a walk round the park. Glad he's finally realising he can take her out and she enjoys it. Now I just need to persuade him to take her with him when he goes to the shops. He normally refuses on the grounds that a) he hates people with prams in shops and so doesn't want to be one and b) the thing's a bugger to steer because he hasn't spent enough time learning to steer it.

plonko are we supposed to sterilise plates and so on at weaning time? I'd've thought just washing them up as normal would be alright.

DD is now 4.95kg. Still not as heavy as Number 3's enormous ginger tom cat. I have a suspicion we're going to be in 0-3 clothes for at least another month. Can't complain though, means we get more wear out of them.

Right, it's time I went to bed and failed to sleep. Fingers crossed for good nights all round.

[pudtat]

Day was lovely, went with friend, her 20mo DS and 5.5wo dd to ceramic workshop to put baby footprints on things. So two sets of coasters for Father's Day (miniPuds and mine) and a tile/pot stand for mil when we eventually go an visit. Very cute.

But have turned into snivelling mess since DH got home and I asked for a half hour nap while LO had his pre bath cat nap and instead he let us sleep for 1.5 hours. This was sort of nice but has thrown my evening schedule totally, nearly wrecking careful feeding plan for DS, and meaning I am just sitting down to dinner and have no hope of getting a nap in before next feed as need to pump as well. He keeps asking what he can do and the answer is not much as he can't pump my breast milk, sleep for me or eat for me. Argh!

[SoYo]

Stormy we're going somewhere just outside Padstow. I've never been before. Can't wait.

MiniYo fell asleep in her pram walking back from the shop at 7.15 so I decided we should start bath & bedtime. Still wasn't asleep at 9.15 so I gave up. Just starting to try again now. I think she's a mini party animal.

[zigwig]

Oo soyo I'm jealous. We went to near Padstow for our last holiday together as a couple and it was lovely. If you get chance drive over to the eden project which isn't too far. That's also an excellent day out.

We have farty wriggly baby here tonight. OH wants to see how he gets on if we don't wake him for a feed now so I'm letting him sleep. Of course this probably means he'll wake twice in the night to spite us but we'll never know if we don't try it. Off to sleep for me too in preparation for much waking. Hope everyone has a good night!

[Eigmum]

soyo I am with you, still having trouble with the bottle so giving up. I am fine feeding her for now and I'll cross the work bridge when I come to it, by which time she'll be 7 months old. Occasionally I will need ( for my sanity and to keep my job which is in no way flexible as its a man's world in banking) to leave her with someone else for a few hours and if that concedes with a feed she will either have to take the bottle or wait til I get back! I have booked a holiday to Florida in january, house with a pool by the beach and taking granny and grandad too... Something to look forward too. Mini eig did great today, no coughing, good feeding and good sleeps, could we be on the up!

[plonko]

Eco hope you're having fun in my back yard did you go anywhere nice today? I may be free for a coffee on Thursday providing DS isn't knocked for six by his jabs on Wednesday.

SoYo does that mean a trip to Rick Steins? I have it on good authority that its pretty damn good there. And I second the Eden project, but make sure you take lots of water if venturing into a biome at this time if year. I must confess, when we were in the tropical biome a man proposed to his gf at the very top on the platform thingy and I cried my eyes out. Dp ridiculed me relentlessly for the rest of the day.

Stormy I think even has to be sterilised up to 6 months, so if you wean early you've got to do the plates etc. after that it can just get washed with the family gubbins.

Zig fx you get a good night.

Oh dear Pud, I bet it was a lovely sleep but you sound like you want to clobber him! Hope tonight's not too bad for you.

To balance out rainbows post...I'm astounded at the hard work you bfers put in. Seriously, I couldn't even get past two weeks so to hear all your struggles and triumphs is amazing. I've decided that next time I'm going to try really hard to breastfeed, I feel like I've really missed out. Formula is definitely easier for me but certainly not rewarding!

[leniwhite]

Damn it, my post earlier isn't there again

DS had gone from 25th to 50th percentile, putting on average 8.9oz a week when normal is between 5 and 7... No wonder he eats all day!

Stephen Fry was amazing, he told us a big secret too - he attempted suicide again last year but has never said it publicly before tonight

[pudtat]

The whole feeding thing is such a minefield. I would love to be ebf as for us Rsinbows tale of convenience would generally hold true. However, I need miniPud to take a bottle for kit days if nothing else. But where we are currently, which you'd call combination feeding but involves giving a bottle with at least 8 feeds a day is kind of the worst of both worlds. All the time of bfing (and our feeds take 40 mins unless he's pratting about which is actually also a worry) plus the sterilising and gear hassle of bottles without the convenience of time. Am going to try hard to get supply up to try and reduce need for top ups but tbh if I can't achieve it in a couple more weeks I think I will have to let the bfing slide. I really don't want to, but a min hour to feed him 8 times a day, without including sorting out kit, or pumping never mind eating/sleeping washing... And ideally a couple of bf only feeds on top. That really doesn't leave room for any kind of life and I think will leave me a snivelly wreck permanently. If I could just give one or two bottles a day, that would be doable, but just don't know if my supply can keep him gaining enough on so little formula. Totally aware of all the stuff re top ups reducing my supply, but notably ebf was what hospitalised us and no one is suggesting I wasn't nursing frequently enough. So there we go. Appears the boobs just really aren't up to the job.

SoYo, if you fancy a pit stop on the way to/from hols let me know as I suspect you will be passing within 10-15 mins of our house. You also have Nathan Outlaw's place over the water at Rock where the bistro is cheaper, easier to book and in my opinion a massive improvement ambience wise on the restaurant, and the bakery/pasty shop on the quay at padstw was one of Alex polizzis projects on her troubleshooting family businesses programme (and does do nice pasties though don't let the seagulls see you eating it, they'll take it right out of your hand!)