November 2012 - The new quiche sleepy dust crop-sprayer plane seems to be working

[StuntNun]

Previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/postnatal_clubs/1725957-November-2012-Poor-sleep-deprived-mummies-and-daddy

That's us just going to bed. This is getting ridiculous! He hasnt slept much today, as per usual, so there is no reason for bedtime to be so bloody late!!!

I need all the hints and tips possible for encouraging sleep earlier than 11.40pm!!!

He's woken allfuckingready!!!! DH dispatched to hand hold and he turns the feckimg hall light on!! Why?!? Fucking eejit!

Bad to worse. Had a lovely day. Told some more close family we r expecting. Everyone very excited. So was nice. At end of night changed LO nappy so I could put him straight into cot when home.

Only prob is I did it on floor n squared right down rather the kneel. As its hard wood flooring. I stretched out my fanjo it's really hurting down there now

This worries me. As I'm obviously not as stretchy down there! How will I get this new baby out.

Izzy, I can try to tell you the things J taught me about sleep, if you want. There are several caveats, though. First, I'm a man, and both ours are bf, so they don't associate me with food. Secondly, I don't want to promise anything. They're all different.

Third, this is going to take time to fix, so go easy on yourself and DH for now.

Izzy. I don't want to sound patronising. But what's your current bed time routine? Maybe if you tell us that ppl may be able to offer tips?

Chasing I feel like a shit father. Other parents cope better with more problems with less help than me.

I feel weak, too. I'm on painkillers for my knees.

Feel isolated. This thread is my social lifeline right now. The advantage I have here is I've done this once already, so I know the isolation ends. It does.

Feel guilty. J has some issues. Genetically, that's my fault. Everyone tells me I should read to him more (I was reading to him for 16 hours a day at times). I've given up two careers for them and I worry the example I've set is that I'm a quitter. I think guilt is a synonym for parent.

These things are not you. They are entirely normal.

Feel like I am not capable of being in a healthy relationship. Feel like there is no way out. Feel scared.

This is stuff I don't have. See my first two sentences in this post. And they are all his fault.

and for those in need - Chasing please stay, we luffs you

Thank you, we really did need it. Dp normally works commentating at these shows but obviously wasn't sure he'd be up to it. He went up to see his mates in the tower and got talked into doing a bit on the actual drag racing, then later on the Dizzee Rascals (test circuit) with ds in the Beco, fast asleep! Twas fab, he's got loads of his old confidence and energy back :o

Think R's first tastes were flecks of tyre rubber washed down with diesel smoke in other news, he didn't slump in his high chair at dinner this evening. Hurrah!

Luis I've seen you in action. How many 2 1/2 year olds know their letters? J is a bright, sparky little lad who doesn't talk much. He patently adores you

I'm always up for coffee if you fancy a wee boat ride.

Argh almost messed up
LO was put to bed by DH earlier. I popped head in to check his feet to foot just now (he moves so much) n stunk of poop . So changed him. For a min thought he might be up for a while. Seemed like he wanted to at. But he has drifted off to sleep

Have managed to move 3-4 feed of water to 5am. So have now decided he will have water any time before 7. He used to do 7pm-8am with a 11pm dream feed. So I KNOW he can manage it.

I just have to be stricter with myself. N my so called Molly coddling! As stated by hubby. Was very annoyed by that.
He also said "I just want one good nights sleep" he was referring to the cold he had last few days n sickness he had last week. I wanted to smack him. But politely replied "yes, that's all I've wanted for the last 6months." Not mentioning my lack of sleep before the baby. He had no come back.
But here I am again. PG n turning into an insomniac.

Pls pls pls chuck sleep dust on ME! As much as I loved keeping you entertained with my ramblings I don't wana do it no more!

Hey PP. which ear defenders did u but LO? As ones I got seem a little tight ? Like they with squash his head. However at party yesterday he seemed un phased by music... It was very loud. Just worried about damage to his hearing

Thank you pp. We had a lovely time that day and J keeps talking (signing) about the adventure we had.

Congrats on your own adventure today

Aww luis. I cross posted majorly there. Sry.

I think part of why I like this thread is because of the support. But mostly as I kinda feel isolated as well.
I think my isolation is different to others. It's more a me thing. In I don't talk to ppl. I'm one of those ppl who sits in a room full of ppl and still feel lonely, like I don't connect, or can't talk to them about my life or they r so different to me that I don't think they relate to me.

So im so glad that you, like I and I suspect a few others here have this support network. But as you say, you know for you this will end.

In terms of your dc seeing you as a quitter. Many women give up work to be full time mums (I don't know if that's the politically correct term) n are not seen as quitters, and neither are you! You have made sacrifices for your DC, very selfless of you. Not something you should worry about in terms of "what ppl/dc think"

And that's my ramble done for now.

Ps ill take a min now to apologise for my SHIT txt typing here. I'm not surprised how bad it's got since leaving work . the only time I type is MN or txting oh looking back as post and I corrected most. But apologies for other shoddy posts

This is the only place where I told from the beginning that I lost my OH. Most of the mums i know have no idea. They probably think I am in a relationship. A couple came to my flat and all they can see is the pictures of us everywhere. If they ask about him, i change the subject. That is how isolated I am.

Lois, you mustn't see yourself as a quitter. You give the best start to your children by being there for them. Carrier can wait, they are only little for a short time. I am also fascinated about the signing, it's amazing that he can express himself even if not talking. I often feel to give up my OU course just because I am tired and can't be bothered but I am already on the black list with them and if I quit my chances for getting the second degree will reduce to 0. I don't want to quit but at the same time I do really.

I think I know why I can't sleep. It's because of my baby girl. She is very noisy, moving, sucking her thumb. So I just came to the sitting room and made up sofa bed, let's see if it helps.

Well, I think we can safely say last night was a fluke :( N is currently on her 3rd feed of the night. Tbf, She woke the first time at the sound of me coming up to bed so I'm going to have to work on that. But even so, I'm back to feeling like I haven't really been to bed.

Glad you had a good day pidj - sounds like just what you both needed.

Like GT and Luis i find this thread a real lifeline. The new baby stage is pretty isolating, even when you are managing to get out and about so it great to be able to come on hear and compare notes and see what you've all been up to. I have Especially needed it over night!

izzy hope you get some sleep. I have no advice for you - if I knew how to get them sleeping I wouldn't be on here all night every night! - but I can offer ((hugs)).

Cross post lily - hope the change of room helps, babies can be very noisy sleepers! I can understand you don't telling new mum friends your situation - it's so hard and so personal that it must be hard to talk about at all, never mind with people you don't know so well

kirrin {{hug}} flukes are good. They prove flukes are possible

Luis thank you As for you feeling like a quitter, I admire you, so I can only imagine how proud your DC and family must be. You have sacrificed your career to raise your children - there is no job more important than that.

GT, the £5 ones from the Santa Pod shop!

Luis, i know another not quite 2yo boy who signs and doesn't talk much yet. Wonder how hard it would be to get them together?!

311 that would be fab, thank you x I will send you my address when I am awake enough to remember it!

Luis I can understand why you would think genetic stuff is your fault, but it really isn't. Obviously I do not know the exact details, but my understanding is that genes are just the way we are made. What you CAN control, you seem to be doing amazingly well. As a man who has given up his career to focus on his children, you are certainly not a quitter, but a rare gem, and as for J knowing his letters so young, that is amazing!

Gonna try to get a few more minutes kip before another thrilling day.

My 4 month old was up 3 times in the night.

My 2 year old is acting like a moody teenager, woke at 6 shouting but won't get out of bed, and just jumped out, slammed his door shut saying 'closed', and got back into bed.

At the first hint of sunshine I have developed a cold sore, and have no cream to put on it as I get one about every two years.

It's gonna be a good day...

luis, you may not see this as you are a nocturnal human an i am Definately a morning girl. Nice to hear your honesty. My DH didn't speak till he was three and tbh he speaks as little as possible now he turned out to be incredibly bright with a degree, masters and a phd in electricity things noone else understands. He has a successful career a wife who loves him to distraction,two beautiful boys and two lovely DSDs. Who could ask for more. (He says he is dyslexic and some psychologist once said they thought he had aspergers )

And so we make the best of life. Your boy sounds a joy. And you did that.

liliy that's a bit heartbreaking.

Am same. I don't want any more friends in RL tbh. I am really happy. I don't have many good friends and my family are really important to me. But you can not do the baby days without support and this has been amazing I an not believe I find it till no four.

Yep I am in the masters widow camp. He fell asleep on the sofa watching it.

Oh dear Dixie :(

Shit night here too. Back to waking every 2 hours or so and waking the second I put her back in the cot - took 2 or 3 attempts every time.
I really thought the good night we had was due to the formula filling her up rather than her breastfeeding snacks. I should know better than to think like that. I am an idiot. Spent the night in tears and don't feel a whole lot better now it's day. Surely this has to get better soon?

I slept on sofa bed!!!

vq if you send me your address before 9.30 than i post it today, need to send off some ebay items as well.