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November 2012 - Will the Easter Bunny visit our babies?

999 replies

StuntNun · 18/03/2013 08:40

Previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/postnatal_clubs/1707618-November-2012-The-thread-where-it-all-starts-to-get-easier-Pretty-please

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
BigPigLittlePig · 18/03/2013 21:07

I pop out for 2 hours and you fill 3 pages?!

It rather sounds like we're heading for tearful Tuesday, sounds as though there are lots of us struggling at the moment. Thank god for quichey goodness.

chasing please phone gp tomorrow, even if that's the only thing you manage (other than the million and one O-related things of course) - the sooner you can get help, the quicker you can start to tackle the depression teaching granny to suck eggs again no doubt

Catbag · 18/03/2013 21:13

Er sorryBPLP, that was probably mostly me Blush

BigPigLittlePig · 18/03/2013 21:17

I had noticed your name once or twice cat Wink

I know people say it's great with a young baby, you can take them with you if you go out in the evening, they'll sleep anywhere...well this babys "sleep anywhere" bit is broken. She's only now starting to feed to sleep, 2 hours later than usual. We have a wedding on Saturday....

In other totally useless news, 1 year ago today was the 1st day of my last period.

Pikz · 18/03/2013 21:18

Must stop eating chocolate must stop eating chocolate must stop eating chocolate must stop eating chocolate

horseylady · 18/03/2013 21:20

Erm very little clue what's happening sorry. Life catching up with me!!

Welcome newbies,
vq fuck about car. My clutch needs replacing. Cost very similar :( fucking cars.

det how's o?

pr happy birthday to dd1!!!

E squealing, blowing raspberries, rolling, moving his walker and thinking about crawling. Can't be left anywhere without moving. Rsv seems to be getting better. Touch wood!!!

ChasingDaisy · 18/03/2013 21:22

Just had a horrible phone call with Him. He's talking about overnight visits and taking him for a whole day at the weekend Sad. He said if I tell my gp I have depression again and the reason we have split then they will take O away from me. He said everything leading up to what happened is my fault. He said I either let him take O to his mums tomorrow evening or he gets to spend the whole of Saturday with him. Like fuck he is Angry

This is going to get really really nasty. All I need is a fucking hug. You should be able to buy hugs.

ChasingDaisy · 18/03/2013 21:24

Tomorrow's plan.

  1. Phone GP.
  1. Grow some balls and man up.
  1. Tell my boy how much I love him.
BigPigLittlePig · 18/03/2013 21:25

chasing thats a whole pile of crap

LuisGarcia · 18/03/2013 21:26

He said if I tell my gp I have depression again and the reason we have split then they will take O away from me.

eh? No they won't. What a shitbird

BigPigLittlePig · 18/03/2013 21:27

Nobody will take O from you for being low.
O is too young for overnight stays away from the main caregiver - not fair on him so ex-p can go fuck himself. Ditto more than a few hours away from you.
What happened is not your fault, it was his fists, his hands, his temper that caused this.

BigPigLittlePig · 18/03/2013 21:29

PM detective your ex-ps current address - she'll give him a taste of his own medicine. You are so much better off without him sweets, he's being such a wankbadger. Just remember he has no god given right to take O when he feels like it.

ChasingDaisy · 18/03/2013 21:32

Contra Thanks and Wine. I have been in the same cycle - try to settle O to sleep. Takes so long he is then hungry again. But I don't know if he is crying through hunger or tiredness.

You just sound a bit worn down by it all, which is completely understandable. We were all told that the hard part would be over by now - that magic 12 week mark we were all looking forward to. Have you decided on a plan of attack for the daytime sleeps?

Pikz · 18/03/2013 21:32

Daisy. Crock of shit. Don't let him scare you. Mothers have all priority and rights in these situations esp when not married.

Horsey glad to hear rsv improvements! No wonder your so busy with a constantly moving target....he will be off before you know it!

ChasingDaisy · 18/03/2013 21:35

Thanks everyone. Don't worry, I know that what he said is complete shit. 1 in 10 mums get PND according to Loose Women today . There are not 1 in 10 mums living without their babies.

I told him no way to overnights and full weekend days.

Oh and when I reminded him of the reason for us being in this situation, he told me to 'Get over it'. Tosspot.

Catbag · 18/03/2013 21:35

chasing Ignoring the fact that it is not sweary wednesday...

What an utter bastard. He is doing it again, undermining your confidence, trying to bully you and feed you bullshit to control you. I am fucking raging on your behalf right now Angry

Speaking to the doctor WILL NOT put you indanger of losing O. Not at all. He doesn't want a fucking paper trail, to have it written anywhere that he is domestically violent, and he is picking things to throw at you so that you will be frightened and do as you are fucking told. HE DOES NOT GET TO DICTATE TERMS. He has no fucking moral highground and I am deeply fucking irritated that he has no qualms about arbitrarily throwing scary threats about. His family will be terrified that you are going to upsticks and do one with O (personally, I think that idea has a lot going for it) and is probably putting a lot of pressure on him to make sure that they get to see O too.

I am so angry. I'd like to see how fucking 'manly' he would be with half a dozen members of the quiche standing in front of you at the flat.

Catbag · 18/03/2013 21:37

Twat.

Catbag · 18/03/2013 21:38

He's given me fucking Turrets.

ChasingDaisy · 18/03/2013 21:44

Turrets? He gave you castles? Grin
You summed up my feelings eloquently there Cat, particularly about the paper trail. That is exactly what he is afraid of. Tosser is trying to frighten me. Tried to tell me that I shouldnt tell the GP, HV etc the reasons I need extra help right now.

BigPigLittlePig · 18/03/2013 21:46

Grin catbag you expressed my thoughts rather well.
Blood.
Boiling.
Angry

BigPigLittlePig · 18/03/2013 21:47

LOL at idea of angry quiche-mob with pitchforks and the like, hunting him down and giving him what for. Hormonal women are a force to be reckoned with.

Catbag · 18/03/2013 21:49

< Grin >

kissyfur · 18/03/2013 21:51

Well said cat!

Love the idea of us all scaring him off! He's just trying to frighten you chasing because HE is frightened! He knows what he's done is going to catch up with him. Well, he should be scared!

Kyzordz · 18/03/2013 21:52

Tried to catch up swiftly. chasing don't listen to him. Honestly he can't do that. You're doing brilliantly, you really are. He is being an utter fuckball and it is up to YOU when he has O. I know O loves his dad, and smiles at him but he needs you. e smiles at me the least and LOVES his dad to bits and always smiles. But the quiche made me believe that he cries at me cos I am his mummy and they cry at us to let us know they need or want something and it's us they want it from. You're doing so well, and O loves you, he does :D

contra we all feel like that some days. Some days I've wished it was tomorrow. Some days I've felt like I cannot do this and have made a mistake thinking I ever could. Thing is, the fact we question it is what makes us good mummies :) if we weren't bothered about our LO's then it wouldn't worry us that we couldn't do it quiche told me that too. It will be okay, on grumpy days (and I'm sure we've all had bad days/grumpy baby days?) focus on getting to tomorrow. Sometimes we cannt work out why LO is crying, but it doesn't mean you don't know what you're doing, it means you haven't figured out what is wrong at that particular time. No biggy, we've all been there. It could be something as simple as an annoying fucking itch they can't scratch?! You go through the list, mentally, and do your best at figuring it out. You're trying, which means you CAN do it. If you just thought fuck this and left LO to it and turned music up then that would be different. Am shit with words but hopefully you get the gist!

Hope good nights are had by all tonight :) I am trying so hard to keep up but it's not been easy the past few days!

I missed you chunky!
cake looks awesome pr

Erm. Everyone doing ok?

Bryzoan · 18/03/2013 21:53

Chasing - he really is a revolting piece of work. At least he is making it easy to see that. I thnk you should add calling the womens aid helpline to your list (or better still call them now). They might be able to point you at some real life support in your area. I'm so sorry you're having to go through this. But please know you're not alone. We all care hugely even though we are just a quiche in a handbag. Big hugs. X

Contradictionincarnate · 18/03/2013 21:53

thanks chasing for the wine and sympathy as twer ...you have always been so lovely on here all the while putting up with that twat he is such a control freak ... and seems like he just likes manipulating you.
I think my best plan regarding lo is to try to get out soon as it gets too much to put her in pram and just walk til she calms ... would help my fat arse too!! just wish weather would get warmer though and I can't be arsed to get myself presentable and there is no where really to walk too... just one shop or this wood trail but same sights ...I'm very easily bored. I was looking fwd to a chilled day today in trackies playing with our new lamaze spin and explore (she doesn't think much of that either!) ... dd had other ideas!
what's your plan of attack chasing ...
as usual I am indebted to this quiche and more grateful than I can explain! Smile