November 2012 - Will the Easter Bunny visit our babies?

[StuntNun]

Previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/postnatal_clubs/1707618-November-2012-The-thread-where-it-all-starts-to-get-easier-Pretty-please

[Sophiathesnowfairy]

I am going to come and bop your P on the nose chasing

[GTbaby]

hello everybody. remember me ??? lol

so india is lovely and hot now. LO is loving it. he loves sitting outside and feeling the breeze on his face. at first he looked very shocked at this sensation, but seems to be getting used to it.

we have both been bitten by mosquitos :( LO has been ok though, however my bite on my eye lid got so swollen that i couldn't open my eye! will put a pic on FB soon as i remember to have the laptop and camera in one place.

MS has been better here, had 4 sick episodes , one of which was on the place [very embarrassing!]. still haven't told ppl here i'm PG! they will be shocked [as was i, haha]

looking forward to our scan when i get back, then i will feel properly PG lol, as if the puking hasn't bought it home.


anyway off to bed night night

[dont worry, im back in two weeks lol]

[MadamGazelleIsMyMum]

Nice to hear from you GT!

[Contradictionincarnate]

chaising I second what everyone has said! O needs his mummy... I get upset as dd doesn't smile at me more at dh but I think its because it goes without saying ...and she spends more time with me so takes forgranted I will always be there! babies need their mummies ...especially O in your situation he needs your calming influence.
have also noticed dd treats me the same whether I'm crying or in a good mood!
that's not to say you don't deserve a break either though ...

[Contradictionincarnate]

yeah nice to hear from you gt glad your ms is better out there ...bring some sunshine back with you too!?

[ChunkyChicken]

Chasing I'm catching up so bear with me... Having read your FB entry, you are doing the right thing. However, it doesn't mean you can't grieve for what you've lost, the man you thought you loved, the "traditional family unit" and all the other things. You are in a shocking situation & may well be depressed too. You will go through all the emotions of grieving. BUT that doesn't mean you can't cope or LO is better off w/out you. He wants his Daddy obviously but its best for your DS if you are his primary carer in the long-run. Let's face it, your P can't be a very balanced, mentally healthy individual ideal for bringing up a child if he did what he did to you... He may deserve/be entitled to access but nobody will be O's Mummy. Give yourself a break & some time to move on. You will feel better & O won't even remember this period of time later on.

[Pikz]

Chasing if it makes you feel any better I am sat on a small stall rocking a pushchair with my foot desperately needing a wee. If I stop rocking he cries.

O needs you... And you can do it... Babies are Velcro it's their nature and if your ExP had him all day it would be the same.

[Pikz]

Hello GT! Glad all is well!

[Contradictionincarnate]

chasing what pikz said ... and I am also sitting with dd asleep on me last time she woke and I thought we would play and I could put her down ...but no she started wailing and only boob would stop her I need a wee too and a poo

[Pikz]

Contra sorry about link... Leftlet in with playnest just have that link

Wee and a poo is bad though the worst is being thirsty and unable to move.

[ChasingDaisy]

I know I am being silly as daytime has always been like this, but when he got home from work I had chance to make dinner, do housework etc. Evenings is his most unsettled time - as it probably is for most babies. I am also missing the hour I had in the morning before he went to work where I could shower and make the feeds for the day. I just need to figure out a new routine I guess.

As somebody said, I am also grieving the loss of my relationship, family life and the future I had planned. I am also still in pain from The Incident and am worried about the legal. crap that is to come. I am also bloody lonely. The only adult conversation I will have all week is baby group on weds.

Anyway....

Rolling - O started rolling front to back at ten weeks and did back to front once by accident. He now thinks this is boring so has given up and prefers trying to sit up by himself and also flapping around like a mermaid.

He also chats less but has started making purring noises.

He has also started stroking scratching my face in the morning when we wake up which is lovely . Could do without the hair grabbing mind.

[ChasingDaisy]

Sorry pikz I think an imminent poo is the worst..

[ChasingDaisy]

Oh and now I'll have to buy my own easter egg. Although I suppose it is my mummy duty to buy one for O...

[Catbag]

GT! We've missed you! Glad the ms is better. C'mon, what's the temp out there at the moment? Make me as I look outside at the farking snow. How many weeks are you now? H was looking more handsome than ever in the FB pics you posted a bit ago. Looking forward to your return :)

VQ Fuck. I thought it might be around that as slipping clutches are not cheap to fix. My Volvo had one about ten years ago and they are really difficult to get to in those cars. You actually have to take the engine out to get to it. Was cheaper to scrap it and buy a new one. There's never a good time for this to happen, but really, car ishoos should fuck off now :(

[Catbag]

chasing I don't think my DH would correct me if I called him shockingly useless and domestically rubbish. He (like me) is about to complete his degree and is either at uni or else sitting for 17 hours a day at his computer (no exaggeration). My point is, at times most of the time I feel like a single parent. Believe me, not getting time to do stuff is part and parcel of being a mum and NOT in anyway indicative of any shortcomings on your part. We all struggle to find time to do what needs doing, but it does get easier, no matter how endless it feels at the moment. We muddle through best we can, even though we all have bleak moments where we feel like we must be doing a crap job. I think that your confidence has been knocked so badly that you are finding it difficult to trust your instincts. Don't panic. That will come with time.

Of course O is pleased to see his father. He does not comprehend what has happened. It is just another face that he is familiar with. You are not depriving him of something/one that he desperately needs. As others have said, he will not remember this period. I for one think that is a better situation than O's earliest memories being his mother getting knocked about. This is hard, but this too shall pass and there will come a point where suddenly every day becomes a little easier, and we will be here the whole time x

[BigPigLittlePig]

Thirst is a bad one. I have a sports bottle with squash in it 24/7, imagine my horror mid-feed today to discover it had run out. Have also had to deposit baby in the cot today whilst I, erm, deposit something else.

chasing I suspect O would really really like the nicest, scrummiest Hotel Chocolat egg you can find obviously for him, like

[ValiumQueen]

[Cat] I nearly cried when she told me. I need to ask my parents for the money as we cannot afford it. I hate doing that.

*chasingdaisy] I have fresh fish, as we are going to need a few for you I think

1. Nobody in the whole world, past present or future, could possibly be a better person to care for your baby.
   

1. You are the strong one, he is the weak one. He lost it with you, and assaulted you in a very serious manner. That makes him pathetically weak. Hopefully he can still be a good father to O, but he has proved you are too good for him as a partner, and NO WAY ON EARTH should he be the primary care giver. He fucked up, not you.
   

1. You mentioned a while back you thought the depression was back? Have you seen a GP? Have you started on meds? If not, then that must be top priority for tomorrow. I am concerned about your mental health sweetheart
   

1. You are young. You are beautiful. You are a wonderful loving caring mummy. You do not deserve what happened. It was not your fault. You will be happy again one day if you give yourself the chance to be x

[ValiumQueen]

Well I really fucked up with the highlighting there!

[Sophiathesnowfairy]

Fuckity fuck vq roll on sweary Wednesday that is a lot of money.

[Lily311]

Can you pass me that fish of yours vq so I can slap chasing hard?

I am not going to repeat what was said, I do agree with everyone. If you think depression is back, pls get some help from gp. Evenings are hard but they will get easier.

vq sorry for car troubles. That's a lot of money.

[ChasingDaisy]

VQ I nearly cried when I read that.

I think the depression may be back - don't think I can blame this low mood solely on lack of sleep. My GP is wonderful. Yes I should see her soon. Wary about meds again though.

Lack of rl support is my main issue I think. I literally have nobody to turn to. Building a support network needs to be a priority.

[kirrinIsland]

VQ I hate cars.

Hi GT glad the ms is easing. Enjoy the rest of your time out there :)

chasing it is only natural to be tearful at the moment. It is huge thing that has happened to you - you are not going to get over it in a couple of days. Some one has already mentioned Homestart, which is a great idea. Re adult conversation, you need to find more groups! I know baby groups can be boring as hell but it gets you out of the house and it's the best place to meet new friends.

I haven't had an Easter egg in years and I don't need one, I am single handedly keeping cadburys afloat at the mo

[ChasingDaisy]

[Evilwater]

Another thread, we can talk. Chasing I second what VQ said, is that a fish a smell??

n has rolled over for the first time today. he has still been very Grumpy. Why does he have to have that high pitch whine that grates!!! I can't wait to start weaning.

He was sleeping all night, but now he wakes up three times a night. Is there a 5 month regression? We were doing so well....

Evil

[Catbag]

Embrace the fish smell, chasing! hmm, sounds a bit wrong, that