November 2012 - BFPs? Already? You girls are going to have some fun!

[StuntNun]

Previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/postnatal_clubs/1693077-November-2012-They-WERE-sleeping-what-happened

vq i was paranoid about chocking and i think i passed the fear onto her. She was 1 before she'd properly chew anything, it had to be mushed up.

Welcome lily. In so sorry for what you went through.

Detective... So happy for you!

Well done Eliza and Ella!

LO is laughing and talking away. He has new prehistoric animal noises to make!

Pr that made me laugh a lot... Awesome game!

Thank you for the warm welcome. It's been a tough year, yes, I am strong but what choice did/do I have? I need to carry on for my little girl, life is not about me anymore. I have amazing friends and family, I couldn't have managed without them. I wanted to post ages ago but was never ready, although I feel I know every one of you.

I requested to join the facebook group too.

Does anyone raise their kids as bilingual? How do you find it? I have dual nationality and speak the minority language to baby girl at home or when I am alone with her but using English when other people are around.

Sorry for very short post - I was on my phone and it is soooo slow it drives me demented!

glenda well dome on getting your shifts sorted.

detective yay for getting your happy baby back :)

PR that made me laugh out loud

lily my DDs are/will be bilingual. We do OPOL. DD1 (2) has the odd Arabic word but mostly speaks English. she does respond to Arabic instructions though, she just answers in English. My friend's son was the same until he was about 7 and now speaks both languages equally. I guess you have to surround them with the second language as much as possible and work on the basis that they are taking it in even if they don't actually speak it.

Just done feet prints into everyone's Easter cards... Very funny...

Just put jumperoo together... Road test time! X

Oh goodness lily I'm so sorry to read about your OH. I do hope you can find comfort here and talk things through if and when you feel the need. We are a caring bunch and with so many non sleeping babies we manage to have someone online most of the time.

lily I can only echo what everyone else here has already said. Hugs to you and your very special little girl. No advice on the billingual front other than to immerse her in both languages as much as possible.

Thank you all for your advice and support. I went as far as to pack a bag for tilly and I last night. He has recognised (alledgedly) how frustrated I am with his selfish twunty ways and is making a visible effort today. You are all right though, I wont make any rash decisions while I'n feeling this stressy. Thanks especially pass for your kind words.

YW I am easy either way for friday pm. I will have the car all day so could easily come to you

How could I forget sweary wednesday?! ignores fact I have been swearing all week

The fucking wankbadgering insurance company still havent collected my pissing car

My DDs are/will be bilingual too. I speak to them mainly in English, except for emergency instructions - like careful! Stop it! That's dangerous - which I do in French to avoid confusion with nursery/ school etc. DH speaks to them in French of course.

And during the day only British TV; in the evenings and on weekends we have French TV on

Finally, child is asleepage! He has dodged sleep all day! He went to the doctors, his ears are fine so it's likely his teeth, am to give calpol if his temp is any higher (was 37.2) Or if he seems in obvious discomfort. Also need to take him back by weekend if he's still the same. He's a bit snotty so it could be that making him feel a bit rubbish too.

Had loads to reply to as sodding usual and have fucking forgotten!

pr sounds like a fab game!

kirrin I have an awful fear of ds choking too, am trying to get over it but it's a scary thing (to me!)

Stupid fucking company mm1!

Yey Detective Omeperazole is the shizzle! Seriously good shit - having seen its results on my niece and cousins kids that's why I was such an awkward bitch to the docs until I got it - am so glad its given you your perfect wee man back. Just keep an eye on his weight and adjust the dose. Also teething, jabs and viruses might also see a temporary return of symptoms. I find calpol, cuddles and being upright help for those times.

MM whatever you prefer for Friday am happy to head to you and you're more than welcome here if you fancy a break from DP.

L has slept and slept the last few days, it feels like she is asleep more than she is awake. Not sure why as she seems ok when awake but not quite as smiley and active as usual.

Can I ask what you do with your LO? I'm worried I just bore her and run out of ideas so gets a bit repetitive.

We sing, read / look at books, go for walks and chat about what we see/hear,
do baby massage, play with her toys, she has time in her jumperoo and on the playmat.

I feel I should know what to do to stimulate her more but feel like a rubbish mummy as we end up with her watching me do jobs :(

Just read all the messages since 10.22pm last night!

Hi to barefoot and to Lily, I can only echo what others have said about your bravery and how lovely to have your daughter there as a part of him, and an inspiration for your happy future.

Weaning, I was advised to try new foods as breakfast so if there was any adverse reaction we would have the whole day to notice and deal with it. Then combine 'tested' foods for lunches & dinners. There are so many different foods though, if you do a new one every day it will surely take months to try everything? I am a bit unsure of it all. We are planning to mix blw and puree. I will not be as organised as VQ.

Glad things have improved Detective.

I didn't think babies could be overfed at this stage either but HVs all seem to have different ideas. Talking of weight we went for a weigh in today and L has gained but not as much as previous weeks since we changed the formula. They are happy with his progress but I am thinking about our options. Obviously with bf you don't increase the amount given but with ff you do, so I'm not sure about mixed feeding. I can't see us getting back to ebf so I may increase the formula and hope he doesn't decrease his bm intake as I really want to continue as we are.

Also, is it weird that my HV calls L her "boyfriend"?

I've forgotten all the other things I was going to say. Fuckity fuck.

Liliana we do everything you do. Oscar's new favourite thing is holding stuff and shoving t in his mouth, so I've been finding different stuff for him to hold so he can experience different textures - my nail file is a favourite at the moment, as well as a cloth book.

He has also shown an interest in water so tomorrow I am going to let him splash his hands in a plastic tub of water.

Just simple things I guess, I try to look at what skills he is currently trying to master and tailoring some of his play time to that.

lilliana F spends a lot most of her time watching me whilst I chatter inanely or sing. She seems to like it. We also go for a walk most days, and she spends time on her playmat. Just watching the world going on around them is heaps of stimulation, you're not a rubbish mummy at all if you are I'm the bottom of the bloody pile

Sweetpea that is a great idea about the water! L is v cautious of baths so it might help him get used to the idea of water in small amounts.

Blonder I got the idea because he was fascinated by the water sloshing about in a bottle as I was drinking it earlier. I'll let you know if he enjoys it.

So umm, currently sitting parked up on the busiest street in Edinburgh with my tits out feeding M in the back of the hire car which I cant park

Lots of crossed fingers she will behave for my meeting.

YW can we pop along to you? He'll be at work but I am getting cabin fever stuck in the village all the time!

sweet finding different textures is a great idea, she has just started holding things so will search out a load of stuff tomorrow. Also like the water idea, L loves her bath and going swimming,she kicks and splashes like mad so will try that too.

Thanks bplp, I just feel guilty if I'm doing other things and not focusing on her. Also I'm generally a quiet person so find it hard to chatter away to her. I hate making small talk prob why I find it hard to make friends

Tbh I don't do half the things you guys do with your babies. She just watches the rest of us get on with life, and listens to me 'sing' to her.

Oh, and winds me up with her dummies.... Which could be fun if she enjoyed it, but she doesn't. I am seriously going to buy more and pop the third one in her mouth when she is staring at the other two. In principle I don't like dummies, but wtf, they are bloody useful. Trying to wean DD1 off her's though isn't much fun. i just give it to her when she sleeps now, but she demands it a lot more

She'll be two in a couple of weeks and am using that as a milestone for her.

Lilliana are we the same person? I also feel guilty if I'm not constantly entertaining O. I'm sure he would be happy just watching the world go by, but I can't bring myself to do it. Hopefully I will relax a bit as he gets older.

I am also naturally shy and quiet so am quite conscious of trying to make sure O is confident and outgoing. Which is why him being so overwhelmed at baby group today upset me so much. Every other baby was fine

blonder that is beyond weird. I think I would slap her.

kirrin I think it is wise personally to be very cautious about the risk of choking. You hear the horror stories that are thankfully rare - in recent months there was a child who choked to death in nursery, a tot who pinched a marshmallow off their mothers' hot chocolate in a restaurant and died, and a little one who died after someone gave them a hot dog sausage. I had an incident with DD1 aged about 18 months, when she was proper choking on a blackberry. I had to do the heimlick manoeuvre on her, and my MIL was hysterical, saying if she had been alone with DD she would have died. Probably not helping your fear here, but hopefully reassuring you that you are not alone in your fear. Others may disagree with me, and think that I am adversely affecting my children by my actions. I am not ashamed to admit I am a very protective parent.

I am not sure children can actually chew before a year anyway, although I am no expert obviously. I puréed meats until they were a year, and DD2 still struggles sometimes with chewing at nearly 3 as she has not got all her molars. If you feel you have a crippling fear, i.e. a bit irrational, it may be worth talking to your GP or HV to see if there is something that can be done to help you overcome it.

PR I have always been adamant that I wouldn't use a dummy and so far I haven't done, but sometimes I feel like I'm missing a trick. Perhaps it would help him sleep better at night? Settle anywhere other than me for naps? Who knows. I do find my resolve wavering at times.