October 2012 babies - we meet them at last!

[YompingJo]

Getting thread in place in readiness!

Everything has become a blur and I can't actually remember what she was like / how much she slept last week, all I can remember is I was very awake full of energy and cheerful so surely it can' thave been that bad..... Currently it feels like babies simply don't sleep

Just quick one to say that she is genetically programmed to get her needs answered so although it its different behaviour from last week, and exhausting for you, , I wouldn't worry.

I am an awful mum... On Mumsnet, holding baby who has just done explosive sounding poo, hoping DH will wake up and come and change her before I have to... What are my chances?

Oh, 3 things.

1. Baby's latch had gone to pot. WTF? For a few days now her latch has been good but suddenly it is like she can't be bothered or has forgotten. Won't tilt head back far enough (so I take boob to her, I know this won't help the next bit), and either won't open mouth wide enough to get nipple plus areola in or opens it wide but immediately pulls back so she's sucking just the nipple. Tempting to let her as at least she is feeding... Nipples taking a battering. Has anyone else had a suddenly lazy latcher and what can I do about it?

1. She has started having what seem like small tantrums at the breast. Gurns, groans, moves head but won't unlatch (this is the increasingly rare times she actually has a good latch!). To my untrained eye it looks like she really wants to come off but can't figure out how to let go. Then she settles again. Odd child. Any advice about this?

There was a 3rd thing but of course I've forgotten it

Oh, yeah, remembered. Is anyone else who is co-sleeping finding themselves almost hallucinating when dreaming? I lie there asleep or half asleep thinking I am holding her and feeding her, then her noises and lip smacking wake me and I discover she is lying next to me and I was just hallucinating, or dreaming, and I get really confused. Did I just feed her? I suspect this is my sleep addled brain, invading my dreams as her noises wake me and inserting those sounds into my dream, where they are translated as me feeding her as that is all my brain knows at the moment, so I wake from the dream thinning that's what's happening... Only to find that it isn't but it needs to. Not sure I have explained that at all well. It's very weird though and I don't like it. Just wondered if anyone else has had this or am I just a total fruitcake?

yomping, mini-C here has done exactly the same, just won't open her mouth properly no matter how hungry, even when I'm tempting with a nipple that's dripping milk. She's also started grunting and shouting at the boob, very disconcerting, and clamping down with jaws while twisting head. I haven't changed anything so have no idea what's caused this :( I've tried relatching but it doesn't seem to help so any suggestions welcome!

Amazingly she's still asleep, after a fairly decent night, so I've managed to shower and feed myself. Hopefully this augurs well for today as DH out 7am - 8pm.

We're off to FIL on Weds (DH working away near FIL and I didn't fancy 4 days & nights solo). No idea how to pack for baby, I keep thinking of things we'll need, like changing mat, a gazillion nappies etc. Once upon a time I had a brain and was a competent human being. Hmmmmm.

Squid, sounds such an awful patch you're in, just focus on getting through each hour. I'm sure at some point she'll crash into mega-sleep.

Love to all, x

yomping I get that sort of thing as well, think its just down to tiredness and those funny half awake half asleep sort of states. So no, you're not a fruitcake (or if you are I am too!)
squid sounds really tough but am certain it isn't a problem for her. Dd1 used to have spells like that too and she's turned out ok ( apart from being appallingly cheeky sometimes at the moment but suspect that's unrelated!) do try to eat properly today though even if means leaving jess crying while you get something, you are allowed to look after yourself as well as baby! wanted to ask also did you end up getting the beco butterfly you were trying, what did you think? Am mulling over whether or not to get one as although the stretchy wrap we've got is super comfy its impossible to put on outside as the ends just trail on the ground and get mucky.
mrsc don't worry about packing, so long as you've got the baby there is very little that you couldn't just buy once you're there if need be! Hope you have a good trip.
woolybob thank you for sharing your birth story, what a lot of waiting you had to do- not ideal! Big congratulations, you did brilliantly.
angelico really really hoping those antibiotics kick in and you get more comfy. You are doing brilliantly to carry on feeding.
cherry think you're doing exactly the right thing!
huffle hope you got your better night, you deserved it!
Right, baby making waking up noises now, sorry to anyone I've missed out and love to all of you!

Yomping, yes, we had that too for about a day and a half. Very stressful, no idea what it was about but it seemed to resolve itself, thank god. Mentioned it to the doc today and she just said we're both still learning. He seemed to be in a generally bad mood that day, so maybe tired? Under the weather?
Latch generally very lazy here though, know what you mean about slipping down the nipple - Ouch!

Hope you have a better day today Squid, perhaps Jess is going through a growth spurt? Maybe you could read back on here a bit to remind yourself that there have been better times. Please remember to eat today, it will give you strength to cope, and if you're run down you'll be susceptible to illness which none of us need right now.

Thanks Smiley, you're always so encouraging! How're things with you?

One of my good friends here, an older woman who I taught English and who taught me Japanese, came to visit yesterday and brought a great gift of a baby gym, but we already have one so she asked what I'd like instead. I mentioned a couple of things we could do with, including a changing bag (don't really need one, but it's hard to think of things when people ask). Anyway, it was delivered today - a Storksak! So nice, must have cost her a fortune though.

I forget who asked, but no, no paternity leave here. They barely get any holiday and a lot of them don't even use it all . Feeling very sorry for DH lately, he has a test for work today and more next week. They're very important, but he's not been able to study much or get any rest because of all that's been going on. I don't feel like I can be much support at the moment and feel very guilty about it

Hello everyone, finally found 5 minutes to spare to begin catching up.

Yomping, big yes to the hallucinations. We are not officially co-sleeping, however sometimes after her night feeds she just won't settle unless she's in my arms so she stays in with us for an hour until she's asleep, then I pop her straight in her cot and go back to cuddling my hubby... for about 10 minutes, then she's up and hungry again. Still, after the dozy jaundiced baby who didn't want to eat last week, I'm quite happy with this hungry one. But the sleep I have when she's in my arms is odd- definitely not proper sleep, but not properly awake either.

Squid, my midwives says babies sleep as much as they need... the only risk is keeping them up for too many hours at a time so they get too frustrated to sleep. Unfortunately most babies seem to sleep during the day and scream all night.

Well we've made a bit of progress here. Using a nipple shield, we managed to get a proper latch for the first time on Sunday (to any breastfeeding nazis who want to shout 'using a shield will create a lazy latch'- fuck off. A lazy latch is better than none at all). She will now feed directly from me for about 15 minutes at a time, which I'm absolutely thrilled about. I'm still expressing to top that up, and make sure she gets enough as she's still quite yellow. It's still very hard work and I feel like packing it all in and getting out the formula sometimes, but it's worth it so she gets my milk. All in all, I'm a one woman dairy farm and it's bloody knackering. I think I've pumped too much in the first week though as my nips are incredibly painful when she does latch on with the shield. The right one in unbearable. Any advice for this? Saw someone had recommended shells- might give them a go.

Anyone else's baby get hiccups constantly (like 7 or 8 times a day)?
In other news, we've been trying to establish a routine of regular naps and waking her up and trying to keep her awake periodically- it does seem to help.

Squid, a bit jealous of your sexy times, but at 10 days post birth, I'm still not ready. Oddly enough, my hubby seems to really love this post-baby body with my new soft tummy and massive leaky boobs. Seriously, he LOVES it. I still feel klike it's a new body and I need to get used to it first...

Hugs to you all.

Morning all, another lazy latcher here. I blame the bottles they made me give him, sometimes it takes master midge ages to latch. Luckily he is patient so rarely gets grumpy but it is frustrating and he also slips down. Has a suck like a Hoover when he's on though. He is pretty much a textbook baby but wondering how long this will last. Wondering if I should start imposing the EASY baby whisperer on him or carry on letting him lead the way. Is it too early? I did everything baby led with DD and as a result We developed Some bad habits which were hard work breaking. What are you all doing? He is pretty angelic so wondering if I should leave well alone...

yomping yes to dreamlike weirdness. Never really know how many times I feed even, all a weird blur of crazy thoughts and actions. And I startle a lot.

cherry bag sounds lovely, I am a peasant and just use a crappy old thing with a nappy mat in. Must become a more polished mummy. they look lovely. Don't feel bad about DH you have given him a beautiful baby, what's a few sleepless nights in comparison? Well done on your big trip out, makes things seem more manageable knowing its all not as daunting as it feels. I felt like that after being out all day yesterday.

Was doing this one handed, sat the baby up and he projectile puked all over me. Like cottage cheese, I'll be back.... And now he's doing a huge crap.

Londonmrss DD gets hiccups all the time! It makes her really cross.

DD is poorly today . I think shes picked up DSs cold, shes cried for ages, looks pale, has a runny nose and is just generally miserable. Taking her to Doc in a bit but I suspect they'll just tell me she has a cold! I'm supposed to be going back to college tomorrow and feel so guilty.

Has anyone else's house gone to shit? I just can't keep on top of it!

On the upside she has accepted the bottle so I can go to college no more excuses.

Cross posted with londonmrs great news with the feeding. Glad the jaundice is on its way out, and to hell with the bf nazis. My baby has a lazy latch because he is lazy - not because of shells or shields or what not. Glad things are on the up.

Squid hope Jess has slept now. Listen to smiley you must eat. You need your strength and energy for BF so have a nice big pie.

Cleaned vomit and pooh of master midge. I'd only just got out the bath so decided to go for the path of least resistance and just wet wipe it off myself. Dirty midget.

Ooh, anyone with a leaky baby, these bibs are saving me a lot of laundry: www.amazon.co.uk/Tommee-Tippee-Milk-Feeding-Beige/dp/B000K83VX0/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1352199868&sr=8-1
Can we talk about baby poo? As far as I'm aware it's normal, but my baby's poo looks like mustard and smells like bread. She does her poos noisily (massive farting noises) and often at the same time as a sneeze. Lovely.
The one day last week that she had formula, the poo smelt like sulphur- it was grim.
Anyone else?

Oh I feel like a numpty. I want to try expressing so DF can bond with her and so we will have more flexibility as she gets older, but I can't work out the ffffg machine. I should have had a look when it first came (ie pre baby exhaustion) but now it just looks at me, making mw feel stupid.

Not a good night last night. I am tired and grumpy.

Oh cherry that is such a shame re no paternity leave. Well done you for being a trooper. My sisters have offered to buy me one but I have no idea which one to choose.

midget and huffle our bean also forgot how to latch. Frustrating. Seems to be better today.

midget I am (whispers) starting to try to implement a bit of a routine, along the easy lines. We will see. I'm quite a planning and organisation sort of person so it suits me. And she's growing and seems happy, so that's good.

We get hiccups but only once or twice a day.

Right better go. She has fallen asleep on the job.

Congrats on the feeding LondonMrs, you must be so relieved! Like you say, any way is better than no way.
And yes to the hiccups, he seems to quite like them but they piss me right off because they keep him and me awake. And very noisy farts, mustard colour, bitty poo that's quite hard to wipe off, especially his balls!

Baby-led all the way here, Midget. I bought a Baby Whisperer book for my Kindle, but haven't opened it yet!

My housework was always shit Wantan!

I think I may give it another week and do the same thing. I know that at the least, when I can spread feeds out too get life is easier but not sure I am ready to give him a dummy yet as only 3 weeks. I think I'll need the dummy to get him to sleep easily. Like to make it to a month at least. I was very anti dummy last time. The result was that I was a human dummy and not prepared to do that again. God knows how you stop a baby falling asleep on your boob though- sometime I can but other times it's like herding cats....

Cross posted with Cherry. Nodding in agreement at mustard seeds on the balls. No wonder some men smell bad, they are a devil to keep clean....

Cross post Livvy, I have the Tania Bee in black. Had a quick look and I probably would have chosen that one, had I chosen it. I think it'll be ok for DH too.

Hi everyone, I've been avidly reading all your posts since Erin's birth (she's 4 weeks on Friday - how time flies) - but it's all gone in a bit of a blur so haven't been posting. It's good to hear how everyone is getting on - the ups and downs...

I'll post my labour story at some point but will be long (it was actually hellish and I found it all really upsetting - very long and ended up in theatre for a CS but then ended up with forceps... hypnobirthing totally out the window, epidural and epist-i-thingummy (can't spell) instead.

However, I'm quite lucky as Erin is a good baby - mostly, she has her moments but I think she's being pretty easy - she was nocturnal for the first five days, eventually sleeping at 4am but we've now gone from awake every two hours through the night to now three hourly wakenings - where she feeds and goes back to sleep again. BF was totally horrendous for the first week - initially before the milk came in Erin wanted to feed every hour and seemed really hungry and frustrated because not much was coming out. And my nipples were red raw (as you will all be very familiar with). Now BF is much easier - although Yomping she does the 'lazy latching' too - I'm not sure how to improve it as she gets very frustrated if I take her on and off too much - flailing arms and scratchy fingernails are excruciating if she catches the nipple too.

Huffle - Erin is a very windy baby too - you can hear her vibrating with it and she takes ages to wind but certainly lets me know if she's uncomfy.

MrsConfusion - I know what you mean re DH feeling a bit helpless re comforting crying when he can't BF! Gives him a reason to pass to me to stick on boob - when actually she's not hungry and just needs a walk. She once was sucking his shirt though optimistically just in case.... Also second the smelly lochia - urgh.

WantanOrange My DH also expects her to settle really fast and panics a bit if she's bawling (I think she had a sore tummy yesterday) He also knows she goes straight to sleep if in car seat and started to want to take her out driving to settle her rather than do the marching/swaying. My friend says to do a 'allo allo' policeman bob up and down to settle them rather than side to side - also very good for toning pelvic floor and thighs that one though.

Cherry haha re your MIL having a good look - very disconcerting - I have to chase my dad away as he comes in to see the baby and likes to gaze lovingly at her - I have taken to wearing large scarves to swathe myself in to avoid. Re Japan letting baby have a good cry - I find that if she gives a good cry her hiccups go - she seems to get painful sounding ones quite often as well as more normal hiccups - loads of times a day.

Squid sorry to hear Jess isn't settling - does she settle in her pram? We live down a really bumpy farm road and yesterday when she had been awake for hours and was really grouchy, it was the only thing that settled her - poor little thing nearly bounces out the pram but still she sleeps...

Loopyla re being along - I have safe 'baby stations' around the house to leave Erin in to get things done/go to the loo etc. She sometimes cries but I don't leave her for long - sometimes I sing to her to reassure her that I'm not far - probably best that I'm alone in the house for that... I'm going to get a sling as the hardest thing is not being able to do stuff and tidy up - even if asleep Erin has a radar that she clocks she's been put down within just a few minutes. My mum keeps telling me that I got left in the garden to sleep in my pram for hours and didn't do me any harm.

Midgetm - haha really smelly boy balls - although getting gritty mustard poo out of Erin's foofoo isn't great either. How do they manage to jet poo out at such a rate?!

Best go now - Erin is doing comical loud groaning as she stretches and wakes up - she's very noisy - if you didn't know it was a baby in the moses basket next to the bed then you might be mistaken to think some kind of Lord of the Rings monster or something was in the room in the night.

at LOTR monster, Katla. I was just thinking something similar. DS is so noisy! Grunting, snuffling, groaning, chuntering, sneezing, hiccuping, mewing like a kitten, wimpering, heavy breathing. He's worse than an old man, but soooo cute. I love it when he's trying to wake himself up, it takes so long, and involves all sorts of special stretches and sound effects

hey, - exhausted wave -

Today is going much better thanks so much. Boyfriend is off and so we went to the dentist together and dentist persauded me to buy adorable baby toothbrush for when jess gets teeth and oddly that cheered me up. We wandered around in the rain, managed coffee shops and lunch out with minimal screaming and nifty breastfeeding. We bought jess a huge fluffy white polar bear suit as it is getting so cold - ridiculous but cute. Me and boyfriend are veering from ridiculous histrionic dramatic declarations of how we love each other but can't touch each other like we're romeo and juliet or something, and tearful furious sleep deprived fights (this morning he asked whether I'd considered giving up dairy in case that was what was making her cry and I flipped) - all very teenage.

Best news is my mum is coming up tomorrow for OVER A WEEK! My brother calls her the witch because of her ability to hypnotise babies. My sister in law is due n a few days so it may not be the full week but still me and boyfriend are delirious with the idea of having a bit of time to ourselves, and sleep.

Jess is not so bad. I love her really. She is asleep in the sling on her dad in the other room, and I'll take her later so he can go play football for the first time in a month. I am going to express a bottle and then get some sleep. She is pretty good if you're doing something (walking, out the house, visiting people) but has been unbearable in the flat the last few days. Even I can't walk 24 hours a day. Maybe it has stopped now though.

Perhaps I shouldn't have got it in my head that you should be able to put a baby down for an hour or two (some of you seem to be managing it!) I think I was doing better when I accepted I would just hold her all the time and worked out clever ways to do it! Am a bit alarmed by what midgetm says about me giving her bad habits though...

Will reply to all in a minute, tea and orange first...

Squid the best thing that we have for putting Erin down in is a orange donut shaped 'baby nest' cushion thing (it has a lion face and mane on it and was from mothercare) - one of my mum's neighbours have lent it to us as it's the only thing that she doesn't clock that she isn't being held and stays asleep in (unlike the pram when it's not moving/baby gym etc that are flat that she won't stay in for more than ten minutes). I think it's because she's in a C shape and it's warm and fluffy material so maybe more like arms. It's a total godsend to be able to 'park' her for a bit so lots of sympathy if she won't go down.

sorry - quick expressing question first - I seem to still be expressing ok though not the speedy huge amounts I did when I was very engorged - I can generally get off about 5-6 oz in half an hour with this tommee tippee hand pump a mate donated to me
Is it much quicker/better amounts with a electric pump? worth my while?
Do not want to experience porno boobs again though! they have settled down nicely now...

smileyhappymummy thanks lovely. am eating better today. & thanks for reassurance
I did buy the beco - nabbed a nearly new one for £40 on ebay!!! so chuffed. not sure how it compares to ergo but suits me and boy so we are happy. have no idea what i would have done without it to be honest!! Agree the stretchy ones are not v practical when you're out and about (I am always out and about)

Hello!!!! Lots of posts, little time, can't possibly keep up! Day number 2 on own going well! Yay! Decided to hav no trips out to see how we settle. Also decided not to enforce any routine on him..... Admit ive been limiting day naps to 2 hrs but maybe that makes him tired and cross in evening?????? Currently 3 hrs in to afternoon sleep in pram..... Boobs getting heavier by the minute waiting on him!!!!

I even managed to paint my nails....... Only clear gel coat to try and protect from all this blasted washing!!!!!

Guess I'm not too bad. He sleeps day in pram and night in basket. So enforcing routine not paramount yet. But if he up all night I'll know what to blame!

Found a new friend today. The dishwasher. Was grouchy earlier and as we walked round house he stopped crying in kitchen. So I put his bouncer beside it and he happily stared for 10 mins!!! This is similar to extractor fan. We get dinner most nights while he lies in pram snoozing to fan. Turn it off and he cries. Kills any chance of dinner chat but hey!!

Flip, sounding a bit too positive here, bound to return tearful in the wee hours.......

Must dash, wash on, tumble on and a wash to hang out!

Xx
Oh and the nipples still a mess, but hoping the 3 hrs off has helped.