Dec 08 Mums - still biffing on

[LadyThompson]

Yes, yes, it's a bit lame. I wanted to say: "Still fucking on!" but wary of causing offence....

I know 'biffing' is a bit PG Wodehouse, as well. You'll just have to humour me

Trace - my belief and dh's is that stopping conception is ok, so barrier methods alright. Things like coil which stop implantation of a fertilised egg, not so happy. We had a big talk about this and when it eventually comes to telling the girls, we wold generally go with the line that if you're going to have sex, make sure a) you are doing it because you want to, not from any pressure b) you're in a relationship where you care about your partner and they care about you, and c) if you're not in a place in your life where you want to have a baby, make sure that pregnancy can't happen. I don't belive that just straight abstinence education is the right thing (fully respect people who were able to wait until married, if you made that choice and were able to stick to it then that's pretty amazing given the pressures of modern society)

I know the catholic line is that sex should only be done with openness to procreation - but that means that older people, or those with fertility issues, are effectively being told they shouldn't, which seems very wrong. We feel that sex is about strengthening a relationship and is a gift from God (otherwise why would it be so much fun?!) and that if DH has the snip, as is the plan, we'd still be celebrating the amazingness of the human body by getting it on. ahem.

Meanwhile when S says to me halfway through mass "yes but how does the baby get into the mummy's tummy?" I'm very glad to be able to say "this is a quiet bit, I'll tell you later" and then she forgets... :)

I'm such a rubbish wife though, we were sat outisde having dinner and then watching the girls playing, looking adoringly on as E tried to push S on a swing. I lean over towards Dh, he says "if you want to kiss me in front of the girls, i wouldn't object..." and I had to say "sorry, i was looking at the aphids on the rose bush"

Kiwi hope you and dh are having lots of olympic fun!

Beans keeping you and lovely dad in my prayers and thoughts.

Obes how is california?!

Nb obes, just spotted what you said re dh and quakerism - how fascinating that the wedding affected him so much. Would you be happy with him investigating something like that?

Vag - your boys always seem to be so happy and secure, glad to hear you got ds2 back safely.

Oh the joys of a carsick child. I was congratulating myself on having caught all the sick in a muslin when I discovered that dd had done a massive wee at some point in the proceedings. Carseat covers in the wash. At least I don't need to drive anywhere tomorrow.

Home from a brief tour of Leeds and Manchester, shall do some catching up tonight I hope amid washing and unpacking!

Oh Beans I'm so sorry. Sending you love and many healing thoughts for all of you x

Enjoying the sunshine here on our return. Dcs are on the decking after a walk int he woods to collect sticks and dh is playing with the pizza oven.

Religion is a funny thing. For myself I firmly believe that religion as an organised thing is simply a way that people developed to explain the world in which they live, from Aboriginal dreamtime to Christianity, it is a collection of stories to explain the world and to reinforce the norms and expected behaviour of a society. However, that isn't to say I don't believe that there is something out there. I always say if I was Christian I'd be a Quaker as it feels similar to paganism is many ways. I went through the usual wicca/pagan phase as a teen and a lot of it has stuck with me, the cycle of the god and goddess over the year of course was in tune with seasons, it was a way of seeing the world, of keeping hope through the winter and rejoicing in the Spring but I like it, I don't necessarily believe in a god and a goddess but I like the balance it brings. I like giving thanks as the seasons turn and celebrating the solsices and equinoxes. I suppose I see the spirituality in nature and the way she looks after us so long as we respect her. I was brought up Christian but always found it too heavy handed and too male.

Of course ds1 is in a catholic school and the others will go there too . His school is pretty laid back though with a big community focus and I am happy to talk about other things at home. I think perhaps not being catholic helps with that. When the time comes I can say "catholics believe contraception is wrong but wev don't and this is why" it must be harder to contradict when it is your own religion. Personally I believe a woman must have choice, for me I don't think I could have an abortion but I have never been in that position so I cannot judge. Barrier methods are great, those that stop implantation do make me feel funny, I had a coil fitted once but it fell out after a couple of weeks. I was relieved really and didn't go back to have another one. Dh and I need a good chat about contraception, I think dh will have the snip as we both know we don't want another baby but since ds1 snuck his way though 2 forms of contraception........

Ds2 getting grumpy, I should go bath him! I need to try to get back into some semblance of routine, the poor baby is all over the place sleepwise without his school run naps! He has stopped putting himself to sleep too, stopped going to bed in the evening and keeps waking in the night and being WIDE awake. He is developing at such a rate though, keeps learning new tricks. Darn sleep regression!

We've had a rubbish night. DDs nose is all blocked up so she's not breathing very well unless sat upright. So we've been taking it in turns to sit with her.

The religion chat is interesting. I was brought up just general CofE and that's how the DCs will be brought up too. We don't go all the time but I make an effort to go once a month. It's actually DDs christening on Sunday.
DH was brought up catholic and was at a catholic school too. He's probably one of the least religious people I know. He doesn't agree with lots of it. His parents are no longer religious following a family tragedy which made them question whether God exists. But the same tragedy made his brother and sil more religious.

Kayz have you tried saline drops? Worked wonders with mine particularly just before a feed

Vag is there a weds plan yet??

A drop of olbas oil on your bra works wonders for feeding :)

We got some saline drops today. I think she might have colic too. Evenings can be really really unbearable as she just cries no matter what really. I feed her and she does feed but then she gets to the point where she is obviously not hungry but is still crying. We change her, cuddle etc but she still isn't happy.

I've decided to have a go at running. I was talking to my stepdad about it and he thinks I might be ok with my knees as long as I'm careful and stop straight away if they start to hurt. He's doing another marathon in September around Loch Ness. It looks like a lovely course.

Any recommendations for trainers? Or anywhere I could go to get advice about running shoes?

Thanks for the porridge fingers recipe Kiwi, I'll give that a go

at the whales Obes

Well survived on the camp Trace!

If DD is still bunged up Kayz, try feeding her in a steamy bathroom with the hot tap running, it seems to unblock my girls enough to feed decently. Colic sounds miserable for you all

We're hooked on the Olympics here - I loved the opening ceremony, and DD1 isn't complaining (much) about the lack of CBeebies, she's really enjoying the gymnastics. How is the solo parenting going Kiwi? And do you have tickets Vag, what are you seeing?

Evenin' all

I am back from Belgium and just doing my notes for my catch-up - too tired to start typing it now (so many interesting things to respond to!) but just wanted to say hello.

Brussels was v nice, though my cricketers lost the match. We didn't take the pushchair so DD2 was sightseeing on foot on Friday. She was a total champ.

I recorded the opening ceremony and watched it last night. I thought it was a bit weird in parts but jolly good, nonetheless. Interestingly, there were some Belgians at the match on Saturday who had just got back from the opening ceremony in London. They all loved it. They said they would have found it hard to understand the meaning of some of it without the printed programmes everyone had, but even if they hadn't had the programmes they still would have thought it was good.

I must go to bed but will be typing up my meanderings tomorrow.

Sorry for Radio silence heel busy and haven't had much time to get on. So is anyone up for a meet up somewhere around waterloo. We could do RFH as a meet up but if weather is nice could maybe sit out in the sunshine at a cafe along the river. What is the earliest anyone can do weds arvo?

Hi all

Sorry for radio silence here too. Went to a wedding in Yorkshire at the weekend, which was fab. DH did a brill best man's speech and I did smashing make up, so all well. We got totally hosed without DDs and it was ace.

Afraid I can't do meet up tomorrow, sorry!

Also can't do a big catch up as am in Kent about to take Dad to a meeting with his oncologist and then his first new round of radiotherapy. Am a little taken aback by how much he's aged just in the last few weeks. Must not cry, must not cry!

Right, off I go before I weep uncontrollably and I mustn't do that!! He's busy in his study at the moment working on his will. God.

X

Oh Beans, I'm sat on the DLR trying not to cry. Wish I could see you to have a little hug.

Beans - try not to despair. The radiotherapy might patch up him nicely. And were you aware that some of the faster growing grades of cancer can be surprisingly responsive to treatment?

Vag - would love to see you tomorrow but I have a vomiting DD2 so I need to see how she is. Groan. She was sick in the car on the way home on Sunday but I thought that was just random - well, it appears that it wasn't random! Which is why I haven't been on yet to do my catch up.

Beans :(

Beans, thinking of you lovely. I hope it responds well to the treatment. xx

Indith, I hope DS2's innards calm down for you!

Proud boasting Mummy alert!! DS2 has just done his first poo on the toilet. I have been convinced he will be in nappies at 18 so I am so pleased that he seems to be getting somewhere in pants.

Beans be strong my love.

Vag and kiwi I would love to see you at the RfH later. Vag am not sure whether urbane boy will be with me - am at work today but have slightly cunning plan to try to get him up here for the afternoon - should all be a lot easier now my horsey friends have finished trashing the local park. That or could definitely do cutty sark tomorrow am if that would be better for boys.

Beans I managed to lose first part of post. Sorry to sound insensitive and be straight onto meet up. Second what Ladyt says. One of many cruelties of these things is that you just don't know how it will respond. Thinking of you and family.

DH has double booked us and I may be a little time limited today anyway. I can do tomorrow morning at Greenwich, as I'm down in Lewisham in the afternoon so very close. I think the boys would love the cutty sark.

Vag can't do tomorrow am alas. I'm thinking of going to watch the time trial this afternoon though?!

How did your Dad's appointment go yesterday Beans? Much love and strength to your whole family x

Well done Kayz boy on the poo!

Kiwi the porridge sticks are hit (with both girls ), thank you for the recipe. Can I make a batch for several days worth of breakfasts?

Happy Yorkshire Day to you all

Beans I'm sorry, I meant to add my thoughts to everyone elses messages - really thinking of you at this horrible, difficult time for you. Sending you vibes of strength and big hugs

ZJ Glad they were a hit! Yes I would definitely make up a batch in advance and keep them for a few days. DH claims porridge is better after a few days anyway, it "matures" apparently . You also asked very nicely how single parenting is going - not much fun! DD2 is teething so it terribly clingy. DD1 is fine when she sleeps ok but has been getting up ridiculously early (5.30am like her sister..) and is then really really grumpy in the afternoon. The weekend was a bit of an ordeal. She's at nursery now so it's a bit more relaxed but mainly it's just SO boring, I am a bit lonely and miss my DH! He was home at a vaguely resepctable hour last night so at least we got to chat but was off again at 6am this morning..

Lots of love and strength for you, Beans, from me too. I hope your dad's appointment went OK.

Well done to your DS, Kayz!