Dec 08 Mums - Breech babies, bedtimes, boozing and Bikram

[KiwiPanda]

Um sorry about rubbish title

Oh my just picked DS up he scratched one teacher, bit another, refused lunch (hasn't eaten since breakfast), scratched a couple of other kids and generally been disruptive all day. Don't know what to do with him or say really....I'm shit at this parenting.

I am interested in the curtain talk. Beans, your MIL suggested budgeting £800 per window and yet wasn't her DH all tight about champagne for DD2's christening? Maybe if I was tight about champagne (or had been in the past) we too would have nice curtains - even SOME curtains! Yes, ten months after moving in, we have some bare windows still. I have bought some lovely John Lewis blinds for them and on some windows we will also have curtains as well as blinds in time, but just can't run to it at the mo. DP hasn't put the blinds up yet, I bought them before Christmas I keep asking him. I would put them up myself but I am useless at that sort of thing. We also have some grotty curtains from the people who lived here before, which drive me nuts. However, we have had a carpenter in who is boxing in some ugly pipes in the kitchen this week, so that is very good. There are still so many jobs that I can't do myself and so am reliant on DP to do them (he is too busy or, alternately, is too lazy) as I can't afford to pay someone to do them. It will all come right in the end, I guess

Sybs, as well as your awful news about your FIL, I didn't realise that your DH was being made redundant. You are having such a rough time lately. I am so very sorry. Much love to you.

Aubs, you mentioned awful pain on ovulation. I don't get that but I do get a nagging pain with ovulation - mittelschmertz, it's called, isn't it? But I think you should see a gynaecologist about that pain, it shouldn't be like that.

Oh yikes, I had a smear yesterday. I wasn't going to bother because of DD2 being so ill but as I had to take her in anyway, I managed to get the appts to dovetail. She was crying and screaming for me the whole way through and I found the smear quite painful. I haven't had one since before I had DD1 and I remember it being ok last time. Well, it has made up my mind that I could never manage a coil, anyway! The nurse told me she'd used the smallest speculum - I dread to think what it would have been like with a big one. Maybe I am just a terrible wuss. I think I may be. Especially when some of you lot have cheerfully given birth to babies of +10lbs! I am in awe!

JB, re: your anaemia - there's something that helps you absorb iron and I have forgotten what it is...Vag will know. Also there are things which inhibit absorption of iron...can't remember what they are either! Oh dear, I was trying to be helpful...

KP - re: cutting paper - DD1 is nuts on "snipping". Endless snipping. Oh well, there are worse vices, I guess! Makes a flipping mess though.

I STILL have more to say. This is turning into a monologue!

Sorry DB, I crossposted with you and JB. You are NOT shit at this parenting lark. DS is just being naughty today. It is so hard to know what to do when they start being stubborn or badly behaved. And believe me, there will not be a single person on this thread who hasn't experienced similar naughty behaviour. Is there any punishment that wil make him think twice? (Our only bargaining tool with DD1 is withholding bedtime stories, which she hates - not as much as I hate doing it and though it is effective I can hardly ever bring myself to do it as a result, ha). But this is all you can do - punishments for bad behaviour plus massive encouragement and praise when he behaves.

But beating yourself up is not allowed. You need to put your feet up and watch The Apprentice on your big telly later when the kids are in bed!

My sister is a July birthday. She was never considered to be the academic one, that was me (a September birthday) and her grades were always lower than mine. Then she was massively bullied in secondary school and changed schools because of it. The new school did a different GCSE syllabus so she repeated year 10. Low and behold she improved huge amounts. I think sometimes repeating can be a very good thing.

I am shit...keep crying, how ridiculous!

He denied it all...now because I won't hug him he has 'fessed up (as good as a 3 yr old can). I just think the teachers must dread the days he's in and must look at me & DH as pretty crap parents. At times he can be just adorable and I know they must look at him and think 'Oh bloody hell Deidsboy is in today' and that upsets me.

He's having an early tea (as he is starving) before I get DD from after school club. Am putting him to bed without a story (I do that a fair bit as punishment), I've already told him. Not sure he's bothered one way or the other but we'll see.

I bet you and your DH are both doing your absolute best and I bet DS is a great kid. However, I do think that at this age (maybe at a lot of ages!) it's a case of pushing at the boundaries. And some just like to do this more than others! It doesn't mean the child or the parents are bad! Tomorrow's another day. It really is.

I still haven't finished my catch up but I feel like I have blathered on too much today so I will be back to finish off in a day or two. Apart from having more to say to various people I also have some moans I want to burden you all with

DP has come back with lots of beautiful fruit and veggies from the market. He does this every week or two, gets all sorts and I never know what we are going to get. It's really nice and they are such good quality. Today's bounty includes massive sweet red grapes, fennel, lovely peppers and shiny aubergines and fresh looking caulis. Yum.

lady Those veggies sound delicious...my online shop has not delivered anything quite as tasty looking

DS in bed...DD in tears at after school club, she has no friends, everyone's mean to her, wouldn't let her play etc. Time for some , followed by and then maybe another topped off with a for good measure! Aargghhhh

Oh dear, poor little DD. Hopefully she is just having a bad day and things will seem brighter soon. But yes, ... I had sworn off the booze for a bit (I haven't been drinking all that much for quite a few months) but I did hammer it a bit this last week cos of me birthdee and stuff. I was thinking I fancied a proper break but I just really fancy a tonight.

It's a shame that Irish girl was fired last week. I've enjoyed being annoyed at her.

Poor girl :(

And DB you are not shit, it was just one of those days. All children are different, some of them lash out at times. He is just learning how the world works, he hasn't really got the hang of other peoples' feelings yet.

It was hair wash night tonight and for once instead of just dragging a comb through it before putting her to bed I sat with dd and combed it and dried it. It was lovely sitting together in front of the mirror :). I felt a bit :( looking at her, they are so funny at this age, she is half little girl and half toddler. Her face is slimming down and her limbs turning gangly instead of tubby, the rolls of fat at the wrists are going but she still has her little toddler pot belly.

Oh DB, I feel your pain lovely one. I have to say by the sound of DS I think I like him, he didn't just lash out he lashed out good and proper. He stuck it too them all good. I don't want to condone what he did, but is it possible something is causing it, like tiredness or hunger. DS always kicks off when he's hungry and tired. I worry about what is going to happen when ds2 starts at school full time he's going to be tired and probably hungry by the afternoon, someone is going to feel his wrath.

Lady your posts made me giggle, and yummo on all the veg. We get our organic veg delivery every Wednesday and ds2 and I nearly burst with excitement waiting for it to arrive. Ds2 goes for the fruit bag and i hit the veggie and the yummy cheese. Today we got a mass of beetroot and ds2 & I juiced some of them with carrots and a couple of old apples. He loved the juice. After the depression of watching ds1 reject all my beautiully cooked organic carefully balanced foods and juice raw stuff, it is so so wonderful to share my love of fruit and veggies and awesome way to inbibe them with ds2. He's my little gourmet taster.

Oranges or anything with vit C will increase the uptake of iron, coffee, alcohol and calcium will deplete it. You don't need to have an orange with whatever you are eating with iron in it, just sometime during the day.

Lady DH has a mysterious love of hanging blinds, I wish I could send him over. It is hard when they are busy to get this sort of stuff done though.

How are things Sybs?

Oh ladies I have a mortifying tale to tell you. I did a bootcamp session tonight with my lovely friends and the friend of ours who takes the group. There where lots of skipping with the rope and starjumps and other jumpy things as well as some stair sprints. Anyway, it was all a bit much for my pelvic floor. I was skipping when i looked down and .....I'd pee'd myself and it was glaringly obvious. I had a wet patch on my track pants!!!!! Luckily they are a great bunch f girls and have all had kids so we all had a laugh about it. I haven't had pelvic floor leakage for ages, except for the occasional squit if I've got a full bladder and sneeze three times in a row. Needless to say I've been doing kegels all night.

Oh and tonight I sliced up some komquats & oranges and am now soaking them overnight ready to make marmalade in the morning, I'm sure I'll be up for WI membership soon.

Hello all

Dear Deids, you are so not a shit mum. They are all little swines at times, and often one bad thing leads into a spiral of crap, as I think they enjoy the reactions of various people. I could cheerfully sell DD2 and DS at various points, so minky are they with their behaviour. I hope the wine helped. Chin up. Lots of love

Back on tomorrow I hope. Love to all.

Beans thanks, this trip short but very sweet. 11.25 hrs sleep last night. Have been there loads (NY, not slumberland) so sleep was the highlight (sad)
I have really odd screen action going on tonight and not sure if its MN or ipad so have to might catch up later as difficult to read back.
I also feel I'm crap at advice and bad with the right thing to say so will quit while I'm behind! x

Bad start already...DS nipped a boy waiting to go in to pre school. He said sorry and his mum said it was ok but I could have throttled him! Had to speak with DD's teacher this morning too as she was saying she didn't want to go to school. He said he would keep his eye on her and make sure that it wasn't anything more than just her being a little sensitive (which she can be).

I'm sat at work feeling sick...I know both of them are having a 'phase' and it really will pass but DD feeling 'friendless' is just awful. I remember that feeling so vividly

Deids Sorry that you are having a rough time with ths DCs. If it helps DS1 told us that no one plays with him and he was really sad about it. So I had a word with his teacher who was really shocked as he's always with someone but that they don't always play what he wants to play. So sometimes he goes off to play on his own instead. Could DD mean it like that maybe?

I just had my 32 week MW appt. Baby is back to back so I need to try and get her to move. Any suggestions?

Hope everyone is ok.

kayz Yes I do think that a lot of it probaly is beacuse she isn't playing 'on her terms'. Its just so horrible though...actually I think a lot of it has to do with her being almost a year younger than some of them too.

I hope she turns round for you...no idea how to get that to happen!

vag Your pee story did make me giggle last night - so thanks. I peed myself a couple of weeks ago on the trampoline with DD, and both mine came out of the sun roof so i really am a lost cause.

sybs How are you all holding up? That wait till the funeral is such a long one, horrible limbo before a funeral. Take care x

Dieds second third fourth fifth what everyone has said, you are NOT a shit mum, they are just little buggers sometimes, and know how to press our buttons. Something in the air at the moment as all of the little boys I know IRL are being absolute buggers - hitting, biting, screaming, kicking siblings etc etc. Went for dinner wiht NCT friends the other night and one burst into tears as she sat down at table because her little boy is being such a nightmare. hope today ends up being a better one for you.

LadyT and Vag I am awaiting this week's vegbox right now. Hurry up I am hungry!! We get Riverford one and absolutely love it. Actually went to a dinner hosted by our local vegman (they are a franchise) the other week, it was all vegetarian and delicious so we were happy customers. Can I have some of your marmalade please Vag? I LOVE marmalade. I need to make some more pickle though, I am a terrible pickleholic and get through gallons of the stuff. Have just run out of the last jar of cucumber pickle I made about a month ago. My insides must be pickled.

And finally, Vag do not talk to me of pelvic floors. Mine is fine for normal running but if I push it/ go faster/ do sprints.. it is not good ...

Oh and Kayz your little possible-Rosalie is following same pattern as mine! Was breach for ages, then back to back for ages.. but turned around fine pretty near the end. Not sure you can do a lot but just wait and see and keep your fingers crossed

Me again. I have just calculated the cost of childcare for the two girls next year. I need a DRINK.

Kiwi, we've had the prospectus for a private school in York through the post today. I think they are sending them to everyone as elderly neighbour who has never been married or had kids got one too. Well its over £8,000 a year for DS2 to go to the nursery there. Not to mention DS1 at about £10,000.

I nearly had heart failure reading it. Its a good job I like the local infant school

Did you have lots of back pain when your Rosalie was back to back?

If it makes you feel any better, that's a bargain compared to what we'll be paying (for one year only, thank god, until DD1 goes to state primary)

I didn't really get much back pain, no, but I'm not very susceptible to that. I had lots of other niggles and pains though!

Kayz, they can try to turn them, can't they? But my two whizzed about quite a bit last couple of months so try not to worry.

Is cucumber pickle hard to make, Kiwi? I love cucumber and I love pickle so it sounds like a winning combination.

Oooh, have just seen lots of other messages above those few! Whoops. Back later, just putting some stuff on Ebay. Such a bind. But I am determined to put several things on per day. I am such an ignoramus at it, though. I have only ever sold one thing before, and that was last month.

Nah it's a breeze LadyT - I highly recommend this recipe - though when I make it again I think I'll up the proportion of cucumber to onion. Tastes the same really once pickled but cucumber has a nicer texture I think. Also, be warned, the house did rather smell of vinegar for days afterwards.. I don't mind in the least but DH did mutter dark curses about it...!