January 2008: I'm four and 'they're all mine!'

[latrucha]

Sorry Simposn. Just couldn't resist.

Madmouse - I hope our gallstones and DHs nerves are under control.

I hope everyone had a lovely Easter weekend.

Have there been any serious injuries yet, Simpson?

The tooth is out! She couldn't possibl be more excited. Very sweetly, when DH asked her what she wanted to do with her money she said that when I have passed my driving test she's going to drive with me into town and buy me a coffee and herself a hot chocolate to celebrate. I am very impressed with level of altruism from a five-year old!

I am currently stressing about studying for my NVQ level 3 to qualify as a TA.

I have not stopped working over the last 3 days and am only two thirds through the first module (there are 8).

My brother and his girlfriend have had the kids for the last 2 days and have taken them to see the cutty sark apparently they had a great time.

My mum had the kids last weekend (sat night) and M was so bad she has said never again

Madmouse - hope you don't have to wait long for op.

Oh Simpson that is not good your Mum saying that . Is it time to discuss her behaviour with someone?

In terms of studying, you will get into the rhythm, get back into your study skills and find it easier as you progress xx

Molly was up from midnight till 3am screaming

Not sure who I can talk to about it as on the whole (bar one awful week) she seems to behave at school so can do it iyswim.

Got totally overwhelmed yesterday re studying but got more done today so that is good

It may be that she can manage it at school but has had too much when she comes home, or that she needs the structure of school to feel ok. You could speak to your GP (without her).

I'm just so concerned that your mum being your main respite is saying never again xx

She has been with my brother and his girlfriend for the last 2 day with no problems (but they have told her ifvshevkicks off they will bring her back home).

She does seem to kick off more in the holidays without the structure of school. I don't think it is the structure of the day that is the problem but the amount of learning she does (or does not do in the holidays) that makes her kick off. She says to me "How will I get better at thing if you won't teach me?" (whilst sinking to the floor screaming!!)

She cannot entertain herself at all and needs a lot of input from me to complete tasks I find her intense for want of a better word. And she constantly competes with J (which he finds very hard to deal with ) tbh this is what motivates her... To be as good as J in everything!! Even her teacher at school as picked up on this.

She can exhaust me at times!!!

I wouldn't underestimate the tiredness of school. Sabela is constantly on the go at school and loves it but can frequently be a screaming wreck afterwards. It takes her almost a week of holidays to catch up usually.

Have been thinking about this. Will post more later if I come to any useful suggestions.

For what it's worth, I do think if it wasn't 'learning' she was screamng about it would be something else.

My brother texted me after he had dropped the kids off (he and his girlfriend have had them for 2 days) to say he is knackered and going back to bed!!

She used to scream all afternoon after nursery last year which I put down to tiredness but as soon as she started school full time it stopped overnight and it has gradually been getting worse again since Jan. the way she has been taught at school has changed drastically since Jan so I wonder if the 2 are linked....

The things that set her off are reading ( me not listening to her), something Joshua has that she wants or can't do as she is too young and food (wanting it and me saying no).

Simps - she certainly sounds knackering, not sure how you manage. Feel a bit :( that your Mum said that though.
I think that you might need to consider getting further advice, outside school, just to make sure there isn't something else going on. Not that I think there is, it probably is tiredness like the others have said, but best to be sure don't you think?
Start with a thread on here perhaps?

All ok here, off to Devon tomorrow to my parents for a few days - was hoping for better weather but forecast isn't great.

Have a good trip, look forward to seeing pics on FB

With regards to M, I don't cope really but I know people have it much worse

I think I am going to see how she is when she settles back in school and take it from there...

All good here, still finding studying tough. J had a great day yesterday and he got his first ever phone call from one of his friends wanting him to go round and play (which he did).

I don't really recommend any parenting books, but I have one which suggests a technique that I use when S is in one of those spins when she can't stop herself being defiant / whining / asking etc. It's the '1,2,3 Magic,' one. He says to do it all the time for everything but I don't feel right doing that. I don't think I'm going to read it again so I could send it to you if you like? No problems if not.

I would love it LaT thanks. At this point, I'll give anything a go!!

PM me your address and I'll send it off. I did it loads at first, and decided I wasn't comfortable with it as a blanket way of responding but I do use t in those situations where she just can't stop herself and discusion is counterproductive. She knows what it means (in her room, in our case) and I rarely have to follow through. I like it because it cuts down on conversation when all they want to do is wrangle.

She is doing my head in today

Constantly screaming about being hungry (bored) seems to be the trick of the day.

Going to try a new tactic tomorrow, 10 pennies given at the end of the day (to both DC) and M losing one every time she kicks off (with a warning given). It might work, given that she is ££ orientated.

Will PM you

Any pennies left Simps?

Haven't had a PM BTW.

Yes keen to hear how many pennies made it

Sorry not PMed yet

Pennies being handed out tomorrow after breakfast (to take into account bedtime tonight) she has 3 pennies left, J of course has 10. M is not yet in bed though (so may lose more)...

How did it go Simpson? Did she have any pennies? Did she melt down???

I was supposed to work today (normally my day off but I wanted to earn back some school holiday absence) but Nathan is poorly for the first time in a year. Seemed quite poorly this morning, then fairly bouncy all day until he went quiet at 4.30 and had 38.9C temp. Long live neurofen. Just a virus I think. Hope he's well soon as we have D-Day weekend looming...

She lost another one over bed time and then lost another as she screamed and demanded all ten this morning. So she got a grand total of....one penny

But miracle of miracles, she has kept all ten today

Hope Nathan feels better soon

Sounds like it's working Simpson. Well done. Maybe you won't need the book now . Have posted it though. I forgot to put any kind of note in. It's not just you: I also forgot with a friend and my MIL. I just sealed all the envelope as soon as the essentials were inside. Classy me

How is Nathan? Are you ready for the weekend?

Sabela and D spent the afternoon digging in the garden. They pften do this as I have totally given up one side of the garden to a building site for Danny. He was making it into one anyway, so I decided to just let him. I usually can count on them to play nicely. Today, however, I went out to realise they had instead been digging up my carefully tended herb garden and throwing the bits in the bin. It is decimated. My fault for leaving them, I guess although S was the ringleader and should have known better.

Well, it didn't go as well today.

She was told to get back into bed 3 times then had a warning about losing a penny and she said she didn't care anyway and did not want a penny so for that she lost 3!!! (Not altogether but one after the other ie she lost one penny after saying that and if she did not get into bed she would lose another etc).

So tomorrow she will get 6 (given out after breakfast).

Will be soooo glad to get her back to school!!

Eek Simps - she sounds so grown up already! I have the kids version of that 1-2-3 Magic book, pm me your address (or on FB) and I'll send it on. I bought it by mistake as I wanted the one LaT is posting you, but read it anyway. It's aimed more at the kids for them to read/have read to them rather than the one for the parents.
It might help.

I can so see M going the same way tbh. She is full on with the pouting, stropping, throwing herself on the floor, NO NO NO, etc.
Ssh Mummy
Norty Mummy
My turn
etc
etc

The boys never did this!

Well H has his own version of meltdown to be fair. Now I realise how lucky I was with T when he was younger.

Cool, thanks JKS

Did you get the book LaT is posting to me? I can always post it when I have learnt it off by heart read it if you like.

M has always been hard work, I remember her aged 2 pretending she loved the naughty step ("I love it mummy, I am relaxing!!" - then she would lie down on it) in the hope I wouldn't use it again

S did try saying in a sarcastic voice in the early, 'That's a 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10' which jut ogt her sent to her room straight away. The good thing about it for me, although as I say I don't use it for everything, is that it gets around all that, 'I'm cleverer than you' stuff because it's not about talking.

For what it's worth, for the author, the time out doesn't start until they've stopped screaming. With S that could be all day until she is sick, so I cut my losses and it just starts from when she's in her room.

I do also like the fact that it doesn't have a material reward. I find reward charts etc very short-lived in their efficacy. For example, she had her baby doll taken away today which she won for sleeping well as she had started waking up for the hell of it (she had one genuine nightmare for which she got cuddled and then just ran wih it). All she did in response was pick up another doll.

Anyway, make of it what you will and feel free to pass it on

Danny can be very defiant at the moment but I can get round him so easily it's scary. All I have to do is whisper, 'who's my baby cat?' in his ear a few times and he crumbles into smiles. It's a joy and long may it last.