November 2011 - early birds, just in time and late to the party, all welcome!!

[TwoJackRussellsandapumpkin]

Hi all,

just starting up a post natal thread for all the due in November peeps on the antenatal forum and anyone else who would like to join in too, hoping to see my arrival by the end of the week, so officially an early bird I hope :)

Cali and Hadak I have no advice to offer but want to send you lots of sympathy. I hate it when Lucas cries and he doesn't have those problems (touch wood) so can imagine how horrible it is when they are in pain.

Mash I an using a manual pump. I can't get on with expressing by hand but had read the 'advice' not to use a pump for 6 weeks. I talked to my midwife who was confident that as my milk supply seemed well established, I could have a go. I was more than prepared to stop if it caused any problems. Thankfully it has been fine and although I don't express regularly at the moment, I tend to have enough milk to get a few ounces on the same breast L has just fed on.

We had a dummy as a 'closer to nature' one came with the steriliser we bought. I wouldn't have thought to buy one specifically but think I might get one more of the same (it's a slightly flat shape so meant to be less confusing for BF babies) and a little case so I can just keep it on hand. He doesn't always want it but has come in handy a couple of times!

Cali poor you & Abi, that sounds awful - wish I had something useful to say but I've no idea - keep badgering the HCPs there must be an answer. Could she be intolerant to something else as well? My DS1 can't have soya.

Hadak I hand express & can usually get about 30ml in 5 mins - it may be that you are squeezing too close to nipple - for me my finger & thumb are about an inch back & I can feel little sort of petal shaped bits inside which I massage for milk. I never got on with any pumps - think boobs too big - certainly didn't get milk any more efficiently & made me sore.

Been to docs this morning - 6 week check - wound finally looking pretty good & she's says I am ok to drive again - HURRAH

Hi all

h007 I haven't really left DS for a prolonged period of time (he is 5 weeks), the longest we have been apart was the 1.5 hours when DP took him to the in laws whilst I put up the Christmas tree!

sevenswansaswimming my DS is 5 weeks and on 4-5oz every 4ish hours. Every baby is different and if she is keeping that amount of milk down and content, I wouldn't worry too much.

kate393 I mixed fed for a while and found that the poo after a BM feed was always an explosive one!

mashpot Well done on your first day as two! My mantra was as long as baby is fed, changed, content etc. Anything else is a bonus! I don't think I cooked dinner for at least a week, DP was in charge and we lived on sausage sandwiches so major respect to you.

staceroo Hiya!

cali and hadak I hope that your feeding/colic issues are resolved soon. I think it is going to have to be a case of perseverance unfortunately, but things will get better. Hopefully sooner rather than later. Cali is there any way that you could record Abi feeding on your phone or something and show it to healthcare professional next time you are there? Have you tried to get a second opinion? You do have the right to do so if you aren't happy with the responses you have received. I really feel for you as we are constantly being told by professionals that we know our babies best and then concerns don't seem to be taken seriously. So frustrating.

We have had a tough weekend. DS screamed from 4pm until 10.00pm on Saturday night (apart from a 45min respite when we took him for a drive) he did however settle at 10.30pm and then slept until 2am and then 6am. Last night, he didn't settle until 2am and then woke up at 6am ready for the day (but he wasn't screaming at least, just VERY awake)

Does anyone else have problems with strainy babies? DS doesn't seem constipated (stools are very soft and paste like still) but he can spend hours and hours grunting and straining and bringing his knees up until he is red in the face! I have been giving him a little water each day and we have just started him on gripe water now that he is big enough, and I don't really know what else to do to ease his discomfort. The worst thing is that is seems to kick in at about 5am - 9am which, although doesn't seem to wake DS up, definitely wakes up me and DP!

If you have got this far then thanks for reading this EPIC post

Mashpot then problem you are having with the being sick all the time, my DS thankfully doesn't do this, but my daughter did when she was a baby. It wasn't a violent projectile vomit, just a constant stream of being sick a little bit, all down her front, all day long. Turned out to be reflux. It didn't particularly distress her, she wasn't in pain or anything, but she was constantly soaking wet and I was having to change her clothes about five times a day. The anti reflux formula sorted her out, but obviously if you're breastfeeding that advice isn't much use to you, sorry.

Perish my DS does seem to grunt and strain a bit even though he is producing lots of dirty nappies, similar to those you describe ('pasty' or at least very soft and wet) We're going to the drop in clinic this afternoon to get him weighed and I'm going to mention to the midwife to see what she says.

perish - what truff said, babies will strain and look constipated but have wet poos - I read (and checked with mw) that is natural. Tiny new guts getting used to the whole process. My boy hasn't got any substance to his poos - like thin pea soup sometimes mustardy but more often olive (due to jaundice we think). Yet he looks like he is passing snooker balls!

I've found his routine and i HATE it. He sleeps like a dream from 7pm to 1am, wakes for a big feed then wants to play until 7am. He has kept this up even though I only let him nap for 2-3 hours in the day.

He is 4 weeks tomorrow and been running this routine about 5 days. It is killing me. I dropped him I was so tired the other day - not majourly - he was feeding and rolled off my arm onto the sofa, a very small distance and a soft landing but it scared the bejeez out of me.

PamSco Truffkin thank you! That puts my mind at ease! That is a beautiful description of a bowel movement Pam haha, won't be looking at pea soup in the same light, LOL.

Pam sorry to hear that you are so tired, do you have friends/family that could take him off your hands for a couple of hours so you could catch up on some sleep?Or could your partner maybe take him after his feed from say 1am-3am so you can get a couple more hours sleep and then DP could go back to bed from 3am-7am? Would you be able to put him to bed a little later, might involve him being stroppy if you make him go a little longer between feeds for a day but he'll soon get used to it. Although it's lovely that he has a routine, IMO it has to be one that you can both deal with, so he might need some gentle persuasion. And remember... "This will pass"

am here, on laptop one handed. bear with me. tough recovery and not yet got general anaes out of system.
bf not going very well - milk come in and loads of it but ds wont suck and gets furious if it doesnt flow immediately. trying lots of advice and using shields so have no idea how i'll feed out and about as it takes 10mins of crying to latch each time and thats onto a shield, not the nipple.
hes hungry baby but sleeps ok - 11-3 ans 4-7 at night.

pam had to comment - sounds hard on you at night. no expert but my instinct would be he needs waaay more sleep in daytime. at this age, let em sleep during the day if they want to.
try cluster feeding in evening to keep him awake, say 7, 9 and 11 and he may sleep after midnight.

my poor neglected dd is being a star and has been ill most of the week and poor dp is doing virtually everything so i can feed and bond with ds. i will post birth story soon - need to, but it's pretty hairy. just need to get feeding sorted and recover from section/general. oh and see my solicitor but i'll save that for birth story :)

at a few weeks old, expect baby to sleep at least 16 hrs every 24

oh god, solicitors MrsA !?! Can't wait to read your birth story, I'm glad you are all ok now, sounds like you've really been through it!

MrsA doesn't sound quite as bad but DS was being a nightmare at latching on until a couple of weeks ago - not every time but up to 30 mins of him shouting & flailing & getting more distressed so was thinking I wouldn't be able to feed in public as no way of being discrete through that then suddenly he just flicked a switch & now goes on 1st or 2nd try every time. Possibly milk was too fast or to slow but think he was just being melodramatic about the whole thing.

Yay, MrsA you're here! Gosh I think your story is going to be dramatic. I still haven't BF in public because F sometimes takes ages actually getting on the boob and I get covered in leaking milk in the process. However, I am going out on Wednesday and will have to feed so I'm building myself up to it.

Snoozle yes F doesn't projectile, it is a dribble for up to an hour after feeds, sometimes accompanied by violent hiccoughs - I will see if I can find any advice for treating reflux in BF babies in case that is it, thank you.

Perish we can always tell when a poo is coming too due to the straining and look of concentration on his face!

Cali sorry the feeding is so tough, I can imagine how draining it is and I hope you get help soon.

Truff thanks, I think I will wait to new year and then invest in an electric pump and hope for the best.

Pam that routine is not great for you is it - I hope he breaks the pattern tonight.

Hi Ladies,

Am sending heartfelt good luck wishes to those of you with feeding troubles with your little ones, it sounds tremendously difficult and wearing.

Viggo has been feeding well in the week since his TT snip, he's still only on one nipple but that nipple is slowly on the road to recovery with the gel pads I've been prescribed.. the milk culture on the other breast has shown infection with a bacteria resistant to erythromycin and I'm allergic to penicillin so I think my gp is at a bit of a loss in what to prescribe. I've been expressing from that breast at every feed and massaging it etc and the swelling and redness seems to be reducing so fingers crossed I'll have a healthy pair in a week or two.

Hadak I can't express by hand and the manual pump was just too manual for me! I bought the Avent electric pump coz it was cheap and fitted with some bottles I already had. I find it works really well for me, better than the expensive Ardo one I hired initially. I can get 60ml out of the boob the baby doesn't use, and 120ish out of the one he does. I don't know why you wouldn't use it before 6 weeks, I think it'll just up your milk production which doesn't seem to be a problem if you're prepared to keep expressing it off?

We had a hospital appt today Viggo is now 5kg at 4 weeks so a nice chunk, the nurse wanted to take a urine sample, of course the only time he weed was when I picked him up to move him to the scales. I got soaked, then had to sit in the waiting room breastfeeding him on a towel with him half dressed, his willy in a sample pot... When the baby doctor came out she said she didn't need a urine sample, he was there so they could check out his misshapen head! She said his misshapen head should rectify itself with some gentle persuasion but then she called in the physio to look at his neck because he only looks one way so now we have to do neck stretches too. Poor little love has had more medical attention in the first 4 weeks of his life than I'd expect him to get by the time he's twenty! Still, hopefully he'll be all aligned and content soon.

Epic post, better get back to the witching hour(s) and relieve dp...

I'm losing the will to live over here - completely at a loss - winding her, sleeping lion hold, ranitidine, gaviscon, more winding, infacol, nutramigen, attachment parenting, letting her cry, making her wait for her food, feeding her often - nothing works. She's a lovely baby otherwise, sleeps well, settles, smiles, gurgles, lifts her head off the pillow now and looks around but I can not for the life of me get her to eat without forcing it down her throat.

I can't hear her cry like that anymore, I'm about to lose my rag.

cali I have nothing constructive to say but it sounds ridiculous that you are not receiving help you so obviously need. Would a chiropractor help? Mine helped me with ibs issues. Sorry not much help but am thinking of you in your hour/s of need

Cali hope you're doing ok -,sounds like a nightmare. Can you leave DH to look after her to get a break from it? Only other ideas I have are to try a faster flow teat or a diff bottle. It is so heartbreaking to see out LOs distressed

Thanks for the support ladies and the info on breast pumps/ hand expressing. I think I am going to invest in an electric pump as the manual is killing my hands and given I need to express to mix his colief before feeding I do need to make sure there is a supply of milk in fridge as well as trying to buiild a bit of a stock in freezer.
Cali I hope that Abi is better soon- maybe you could ask for a second opinion. I remeber what it was like with DS1 when asking for support. Video/recording Abi feeding sounds like a good idea.
Mrs A Good to see you made it over here. Hope you are recovering ok
Re feeding when out and about- we haven't ventured out as yet- well only to docs and shops so need hasn't yet arisen. I fear it will be a bit of a faff as his colief needs mixing with only warm milk but the colief needs to be kept refrigerated so I will need two insulated bottles- one for expressed milk, one for colief, somehere to warm milk, a setrile pot to mix and then feed it to him from and then getting my boobs out to actually feed him!! I will look like a "mad scientist" with all my little bottles of potions. I think we may well just stay in.
Need to get into gear for Xmas tree has been delivered and need to find time to decorate it today and I suppose I should think about getting presents wrapped.
Hope you all have a good day.

Hi everyone not had the chance to catch up on this thread recently. Sleep deprivation was terrible so we had to call in the cavalry ie my mum who is staying with us and taken the little one for a couple of nights. Thank heavens she is here as I have a kiwi sized lump on my breast which is very painful. Doc gave me antibiotics but isn't happy so wants to see me tomorrow in case it is an abscess. At least the little one seems to be doing well and actually slept for four hours for his granny.

Oh Cookie, glad the cavalry was available to help out, hope the lump doesn't come to anything.

Cali, the feeding sounds absolutely awful, has the health visitor ever watched a feed? It might be worth asking her to come round at the time you are due to feed Abi so she knows what you're talking about. If she still doesn't listen, then you should try crying, I find that can get you a long way in life! I wish there was something I could do or say, but I'm sure that you are doing everything right to help her, and only the health professionals can do anything... its just convincing them.

Smiling I know what you mean about medical intervention. Having Eddie in hospital for the first two weeks of life, he had more treatment than I have had in my life up to pregnancy! Did anyone else have a really difficult pregnancy after expecting it to be fine because they are never ill? Or the other way round? I guess health in pregnancy doesn't have a lot to do with general health and wellbeing.

Everyone working out how to leave the house while breast feeding, mucho respect, I don't think I could cope with that, I like my bottles now I'm over the initial guilt. I don't honestly think I could ever have managed breast feeding, even if Eddie had been more keen. He made the decision for me by coming so early and being so weak, but ultimately I think I would have given up by now anyway. Oh well, at least he got the first two weeks. I think thats all I'll aim for with any subsequent children. (Though the consultant said I shouldn't risk having any more after the problems this time)

The HV has seen her eat, and I burst into tears constantly when talking to them - and they're trying their best, I think. They're just limited to what they can do, really. I called the dietician this morning and she changed her formula to Neocate - hypo-hypo allergenic. If all else fails I have paed. appt on Monday - but that's a week of fun away.
I have had three or four opinions by now - mostly conflicting (CMI vs. reflux, or both, or none), which means we're treating for everything.
Dietician did say that if Neocate fails it's medical investigation next. Ho Hum.

Hey guys, have turned into a bit of a lurker, but wanted to say that I'm thinking about everyone having troubles and hoping that things get better soon for you all. I feel very lucky that my grumbles are minor and wish that there was something I could do to help out you guys...

Oh Cali, can't think of anything helpful to say apart from that hopefully it's colic which means it will pass in the not too distant future, you'll get there.

Has anyone started looking at nursery's yet? Seems premature considering he's only 4 weeks and I'm not planning to go back until Sept/Oct next year but apparently it's V difficult to get the places you want here so I've just emailed all the nurseries around me to go and have a look...

Cali - that sounds awful. It's horrible when they scream in pain. You must be hating feeding her at the moment :( there is a reflux support group on here who might be able to help/give advice.

the only thing I can think of is what size teat are you using? Do you think you need to go up a size? Wondering if milk is not coming out fast enough for her. Also she doesn't have cold/blocked nose? As DD struggled to feed as couldn't breathe and got v distressed.

MrsA - bloody hell, sounds like you've been through the wringer. Take one day at a time. That's brilliant that you've got tons of milk, now Ds needs to learn how to breastfeed. You'll be feeding like a pro in no time . Sounds like your DH and DD are lovely. Hope you've got other support whilst you are recovering from c section.

Pam- agree with mrsA that ds should nap more in day. Bizarre but they sleep better if they nap in the day. I'm noticing ds is falling into a routine. The only time he doesn't fall asleep straight away after feeding is mid day where he is alert and content (ish!). He always wakes up crying as nappy is wet but I change him and put him under gym to kick and wave until he realises he's hungry. Always tires him out :) best thing we bought for DD.

Cali - reflux support thread

Hi all

I am feeding DD atm so not got time for a long post, wanted to say Pam I agree that it sounds like he needs more daytime sleep as they say that good daytime sleep = good nighttime sleep, bizarre but true. Also I would try introducing a feed at 10/11pm, whether this is dreamfeed or wake him up properly (you could try both) as you will be disrupting the cycle he is in and hopefully resetting a new one where he might sleep past 1am. I don't want to recommend using Gina Ford to anyone as its a very contentious issue but I do think that her book and the Baby Whisperer book are very good for information regarding feed and sleep times, they both helped me a lot after DS was born and I had no clue about those things.

Cali I have no advice but just wanted to say I hope things start to improve soon. Remember this will pass (I know thats easy to say but it is what helps me whenever things get difficult) Have you tried cranial osteopathy?

DD is doing well, feeding well (I am breastfeeding and feed anywhere and everywhere, standing, lying or sitting - take a big pashmina if you want some privacy out of the home but its fine and I've never had any negative attention with it), sleeps like a dream at night but won't nap easily in the day unless in the sling/carseat/buggy - its like DS deja-vu all over again, quite windy but infacol seems to be helping and we are having some lovely smiles now

hadak expressing is slow IME - I don't think electric will make any difference to that. I would love to know how you hand express alicat one hand / two hands and what do you catch the milk in??

DD had exactly the poo struggling problem - strained a lot but runny ones and the cranial osteopath seems to have cured that so highly recommend it for anyone with same problems.

I thought I said I didn't have time for a long post, I am better at NAK-ing than I thought