Dec 08 Ladies - We're fat, we're thin, we're nearly 3 years in!!

[DeidreBarlow]

Sorry for the shocking title - couldn't think of anything else and our babies little people will be 3 in the next few months!

that didn't make sense - sorry - am tired. I meant - Either a nursery at dh's work which is OK for him to drop off and pick up but not so local (20 min) or stay at DS's current one and add dd altho it costs more and is less flexible (we would have to pay early drop off fee to leave them at 0730 so dh can get to work on time (but only when I'm away which would only be twice a month on average.
I must add that ds LOVES nursery now. He waved me off today and all week has been saying "we need to go to nursery school now" and goes off to his room looking for his backpack! Then today he introduced me to his best friend Madison and introduced his sister to the staff when I arrived with dd to collect him however, I know it will probably be the same at a new one, he's only been there since Sept once a week!!!!

Dad was actually due to be discharged today re: chest infection as it looks like the intravenous antibiotics did their stuff, and is still hoping to start chemo asap, but I haven't phoned as I want him and my Stepmum to have a rest. Thank you so much for all your kind thoughts (much appreciated). I am glad you feel a bit better today, Beans. It definitely sounds like you are thinking along helpful lines. I think I am still in the shock stage as I just feel like crying all the time. It's the anniversary of DH's death on Monday so it's never a completely fabulous time of year, although the fact that DD1 was born in November stops the month from being a complete gloomfest. JJ, I would love some prayers for Dad, thank you so much (sorry to hear about your heating and hot water woes - those sort of privations are so depressing). I know that he wants to go on a cruise with my stepmother, so I am very much hoping that he will be able to do that.

Beans, that is such good news about the house. I will have another proper look at it in a min - but how super. It'll be a nice thing to chat to your Dad about as well. Did you hear any more about that job?

Sorry about your crappy appt, JB. That does sound duff. Well, I am no bf guru but it all sounds most unsatisfactory, I hope the Birmingham team are more helpful. You asked about Christmas gifts a while back, for the children. We won't be going large. I feel they get a lot of stuff from other people anyway, so we tend to go with small things to play with, books and things to wear. DD1 is very keen on Bagpuss so she will be getting a toy one for her birthday. If I had bags of money, though, I would buy a lovely rocking horse. My DP has gone up to near your neck of the woods for a few days, he's at Bolton Crown Court. Oh, and we had no idea about DD2 and egg but I had noticed that she never wanted to eat it, which was strange given that she adores most things.

So, Rubes, how on earth are you managing if MIL isn't having the kids? You must be knackered. And how is your bro?

Kayz, how are you feeling now? I see your awful bug has gone but how is the morning sickness going? I hope it's reducing a bit. I remember that early stage of pregnancy being so tiring.

Invis, how was your hol?

ZJ, I did smile at your priming DD for the new arrival by teaching her to dress herself. Wow, that sounds like a really sensible and forward thinking idea. And no double buggy? I still use mine, I must say, but that's mainly because I can't always stand to go at DD1's dawdly pace.

Trace, are you there? No pressure if you are just lurking. I hope you have been feeling better this week and have been being kind to yourself.

Vag (and Rubes) I did have a little grin about Canberra. You know, I wondered if there was something a bit iffy about it because one just never hears anything about it! Anyway, my pal won't mind. He will just enjoy being somewhere English speaking for a change and not war torn.

AAA, are you back into work now? Have you been able to pick up the project you'd been working on? How is your DD1 and Doris?

Spot, how are you settling in? Too early to tell, I guess....I am off to read your blog in a bit, it's been a while.

Effie, you are so thoughtful to ask about our draughty old house. It's not what I am used to and the real fire in the living room gets used in the evenings, whereas the stove in the kitchen, which powers the radiators, is hardly being used at the moment. I must admit I am rather nervous of it. But also I need to get on top of making sure every room has curtains

Today DD1 asked me if she ate bird poo, she'd be able to fly Well, it's a thought.

My eyes are getting a bit tired so although I haven't said everything I wanted to to everyone I wanted to, I send a big hug to all of you.

With DP away I was going to go to London tomorrow with the girls as I am sorting through stuff in my flat, but I don't really have the energy. Going back a bit, last weekend was quite interesting prior to the dramas of DD2's allergy appt and the news about Dad - I went to a big party for two people who were leaving the BBC and there were quite a few random famouses there. I was a bit pissed and I gave the man who does the voice for Come Dine W. Me a big hug, but told him it wasn't for that but for BigBarn Farm. Oh dear. And then on the Saturday, I went to the exhibition at one of the Buckingham Palace galleries of photos of the Scott and Shackleton expeditions. Now THEY were brave. Saw friends of DP's on the Saturday night then went to a concert of some Bach cantatas at the Royal Academy on Sunday morning. I haven't done anything like that for about 6yrs. It was great. Night night all.

Oh - last thing, anyone seen the adaptation of The Slap on BBC4? It started on Thursday but it's on iPlayer. I thought it was good.

I hadn't been refreshing, Rubes, so didn't see your post. Mmm, tough one. I do think you'd need to have a good look around the new one before you could know for sure - I guess you are too busy at the mo? But DH picking up and dropping off would be good, surely. How long would it take your MIL to drive to it in the case of an emergency?

Oh Lady let me know if you want to meet up sometime to get your mind off stuff (as you know, I'm good at talking loads of nonsense about myself) Hope you are ok as can be expected in this rotton month, but yay for DD's B'day x
Didn't want to add to it as I don't think it's anywhere near the same, but Mum has had a melanoma just taken out and will get final results tomorrow. They think it's one chance in a million of it being a problem now, but she is a ball of stress since she's one had Breast Cancer and fought back. So I'm not too worried but it's never nice.
DB is at home and on AB's etc and on about 5L water a day so just being monitored really for flare ups.
Lady thanks for the Big Barn Farm chuckle!
Up late again.... Bugger.

Hi Lady - crossed.... (rare these days isn't it!)
No I'm not busy at all this month (now) was suppose to go to Florida but grounded at the mo with ID issue. My only other NY trip doubt I'm doing either. Couple of b'day do's and not much else really x

Oh and about hmm an hour and 15 for mil to get there I'd say. But she drives slow so maybe longer, and it is the M-25 so perhaps add another half hour on for all the usual M-25 malarky.

Gosh, so sorry to come on here and see so much difficult news. So very unfair. Beans, LadyT I can totally understand how you'd feel totally poleaxed.

LadyT - I don't necessarily need to bore on here, but if I can help at all on the practicalities of allergy stuff do just drop me a line. I think more kids than not grow out of egg allergy - certainly my nephew and niece both did. So with any luck it is not forever.

Hols were pleasant enough - usual mixed bag of weather for England in October. Had a truly glorious day where we managed a coast walk. Very proud of DD for making it round 2 miles without complaint. And we completely randomly bumped into some old school friend of DH's in an obscure middle of nowhere pub so had a fun afternoon with them.

Nothing on the scale of the worries on here, but MIL was admitted to hospital after another fall on Friday, so DH understandably fretful as not clear how the ILs are coping. Nothing life threatening I think, just the grind of old age.

Beans - congrats on the house. It looks great. Did they accept your low offer or did you persuade your DH to spend a bit more? It will be good to have something positive to distract you. Is there a good primary school near the house?

Lady - last weekend sounds blissfull. I am glad you had that before the bad news hit. Fingers crossed that your dad got home yesterday.

Rubes - I don't quite get why the hospital nursery poses more of a problem for your MiL to get to in an emergency. Aren't both nurseries miles from Kent & equally impossible for her to get to quickly? Anyway most days you will be the emergency contact and when you are away, if there is a genuine urgent emergency, would it not be great to have DH so close and able to respond?

Invis - I'm glad you had a nice hol. Have you let your nanny go yet?

Jam - I loved last week's willy tale!

WG - lovely to see you! How are you doing? Please don't stay away over guilt about catching up. How is yr DH's filming? I saw Stephen Fry tweeting about it quite a bit. So exciting!

Safety post. Back in a min.

Guess whose back? Tube been in same station for 15 mins. Bugger.

JB - your kidney appt sounds most unsatisfactory. Do you have more trust in your Birmingham team? I hope they are better. Re presents: DD1 is all about Lego at the moment and I love playing it with her so she will get a Lego castle set. DD2 aspires to being older and covets her sister's play mobile so I might get her a play mobile set (maybe the farm). They each get one big present, two books, new PJs and stocking fillers from us.

ZJ - I loved your name choices on the names thread. Any more thoughts?

Quick update on me. Back at work and scrabbling to catch up with a big project. Working 12-14 hour days and seeing the girls for maybe 10 mins a day Mon - Thurs. At least I have my Fridays with them - I missed those while on jury service. I'm rather stressed and girls are (understandably) playing up so i find myself shouting at them wven in those 10 mins. Feel so guilty but just got to get through to Dec 16th and all will be OK. Am going to reduce my hours in Jan so I get home at 6pm on a normal day (it's usually 6.45pm). Oh and DH and I fought this morning because he keeps accepting work trips that are optional, pay no extra, are boring, and take him away for two nights most weeks. The other two nights he does night duty so he never sees the girls in the eve (he does give them breakfast and take DD1 to school most mornings). I just think the girls need more than we are giving them at the mo. Thank God they love their nanny.

AAA - we have the play mobile farm and DD1 loves it. Although it is quite little and fiddly. She's getting into it now, but it was too early last year when she got it. Am thinking about a doll's house. And yes, they did accept our low offer, which is brilliant. There is a village school that only has 8 pupils per year. I'm off to have a look at it next week. The next door village also has one, and it's only 1 mile away, so if first choice is awful, then it's not far to go elsewhere! But the village one is walkable. Marvellous!

Your situation with not seeing the girls sounds a bit miserable, you poor thing. I'm sure your girls will readjust and start behaving less erratically once you've settled back to normal. Parenting is not an easy thing, is it?

Rubes - I must say, I think the 20mins away nursery sounds ideal (once you've seen ti and if you like it), purely because it's easier for DH in case you're not available. Plus more flexible, which is good. Hmmm. Go with your gut instinct though.

Lady - how are you feeling today? I'm back to weeping again today, having had a merciful day off yesterday. I am so exhausted and feel totally wrung out. PHysically and emotionally! Now am trying to sort out surveyors for the house, which is keeping my mind off it. Dad hasn't decided about the chemo yet, so will call him later. But they've said it's unlikely to keep him alive for any longer, damn it.

Must go and feed the littlest beast.

Hi Beans, I was going to say you sound a little more chipper until I got to your last paragraph These things take time, as I'm sure you know, so you're going to have your good days and bad. I see you making good memories with your Dad in your new house.
Re the nursery, DH is quite keen, so I'm off to have a look at it today. I feel disloyal to the current nursery, but as dh said, it's just a business deal at the end of the day.
AAA - yes not a huge difference, but mil is about 45 mins away now vs about an hour 20 with the other one, but you are right, and have made me feel good about it, I'm sure it would be better to have dh there if I'm out of the country rather than have him 20 min away if they are at the one near our house. I hope I like it.
Right I'd better get sorted. DS is an absolute nightmare if I don't get hm out of the house these days. He's driving me mad with constantly fighting with DD and all that!

Hello guys ? beans fbooked me and reminded me of all of you ? sorry for being awol. Am doing a massive catch up based on a series of notes i wrote on my iphone in the car while dd2 was sleeping, so forgive randomness...

First of all, apols for being awol ? dh has been filming for the past 4 ½ weeks, which has left me a single mum during the week which i am not used to. He leaves at 6am and returns at 9pm, so i?ve gone into lockdown mode and been doing the bare minimum. Huge respect to those of you who do this on a more permanent basis ? hats off!

So, here goes. It is in chronological order...

kiwi - mahoosive congratulations ? gorgeous name (dd1?s name!) and what a great birth you had. How are you doing? And so sorry to hear about your sister?s mmc ? how is she doing?

JJ - you poor thing - S?s behaviour sounds tricky and the way nursery are dealing with it sounds a bit crap. I am sure she is a delight and the trickiness is the sign of an interesting and intelligent girl emerging. Breathe...

Very jealous of your meet up ? it was our wedding anniversary and I am not yet at the stage where I would be comfortable having someone else put dd2 to bed. Dh hasn?t even done it yet.

kayz - congrats! Hope the morning sickness is abating and you can really enjoy this pregnancy

spot - woo hoo on the move! Where are you now? A village? But it?s yours yours yours!!!

lady - glad you are getting more involved in your village life. It really is always the answer, isn?t it? Feeling isolated ? involve yourself; having problems with a child ? spend more quality time with them. Mind you, easier said than done.

sybs - we are attempting a kitchen extension (plus a loft conversion) next year sometime. I am so terrified of the prospect, we?ve been putting it off for a couple of years now. But with dh?s good fortune work-wise at the mo, i have persuaded him to go for it. If you have any advice, please let me know. Please keep telling me it will be worth it

zj - when are you due? Glad it is going well

beans and lady - i cannot tell you how sorry i am to hear about your poor dads. I can only reiterate what aaa and lady said ? my mum had 6 months between diagnosis and death, and she lived like she had never lived before: saw all the people she wanted to see, did trips, bought things, said things, enjoyed things. In a crazy way it is a privilege to live life this fiercely. As lady said, we are all dying, just some of us know it is around the corner. I really hope that you and your families can find a way through it. My mum?s illness brought the best out of her and therefore out of her friends and family ? some people aren?t so lucky. Keep talking, keep crying, keep living every minute. Lots of love to you

beans - fab house news. I met dh as my mum was dying ? it was the best and the worst things happening at the same time. But i know my mum was thrilled to pass me onto the next person to love me unconditionally in my life. I?m sure your dad will be thrilled to see you get this wonderful house (link, please ? have lost where it is) and begin making it your dream family home. And while we?re on it ? your latest poo story made me nearly poo myself.

aaa - i did jury service a while ago ? found it fascinating ? you?

lady - funny you mention DL as big barn farm/come dine with me man ? he?s in dh?s thing and i indeed gave him a big hug the other day. While he was wearing two wigs.

And back to me: dh has been filming filming filming ? SF is a mixed bag ? will say more soon. There is a stellar cast and it is all terribly exciting and utterly draining and exhausting. As i said, he leaves the house at 6 and is back at 9. It is terrible, terrible, terrible for family life. And it isn?t at all glamorous ? they are filming in a disused studio in hayes with the crappest caterers because they are the cheapest (on a v v tight budget). Fingers crossed it all works out and is a hit. Will let you know when it is on.

Am off to Portugal with dad and LF next week for a 2 week holiday. So may get some rest while other people help with the girls. In the meantime, must go to bed. Night night all.

Really lovely to hear from you, WG. I know only too well the rigours of filming, but it's just so wonderful that it's happening and I cannot wait for the result. I didn't know DL was in it. He is a nice man. Anyway, it sounds like your trip to Portugal has come at just the right point - have a swell time! Everything you say about life limiting illnesses is wise and true. I'm just not quite on top of it all yet. Would love to hear more about how things are going with you, when you are back. How are you finding life with two now, and what is DD2 like?

Rubes, what did you think to the nursery? And fingers crossed for your Mum's melanoma results tomorrow. I'd love to meet up in Reading or something soon, that would be immensely cheering.

Beans, I don't really know how to describe how I feel really except to say that I feel sad all the time. That probably sounds banal, but it feels terrible. And I feel like I've got no more space in my head for anything and like it's about to explode. Did you find a surveyor?

DP was due to be away until Saturday but something has happened with the case and it's finished so he will be back late tonight. I had been planning to go to London to carry on sorting out my flat (it's really got to be cleared by the end of the this month and I have barely started - nightmare) but I'm not sure now. I just feel rather feeble. I might consider paying someone to pack it up.

AAA, your and DH's work schedules sound so hard at the mo. At least you have a date when you know things are going to improve from, though. And it's before Christmas!

Glad you had a decent trip, Invis. Reading anything good? I'm reading The Birthday Boys by Beryl Bainbridge, which is about Scott's expedition. I am more Scott obsessed than usual at the moment as I am helping to organise a crazy cricket trip to Oslo to celebrate the centenary of Scott's being beaten there by the Norwegians. It's all a bit mad. And more than I can cope with at the moment, tbh.

In fact, I am going to read a bit more of it now. Goodnight lovely ladies. Lots of folk are being light on posting at the moment - where's DB and Summer, for instance? I could do with some chit chat.

WG - glad to see you back on here. All consuming work is a bugger. Hope Portugal is fun - my sis was there a couple of weeks ago, i think they had a lovely time.

aaa - I am a softy, so although nanny knows her days are numbered, I have allowed her to take her time to find something else. To the best of my knowledge she has been offered and turned down a couple of alternative jobs. Anyway, xmas is the hard deadline. TBH, with DH's mum in hospital its been handy to have her around. Not sure how we will deal with that kind of thing.

LadyT - managed to go away without a stash of books, which is truly unthinkable for me. Picked up the latest Kate Atkinson which was the best of the tesco options (and I do quite enjoy them). Have just started the Northern Clemency which I randomly picked up in a totnes bookshop. Middleclass fear and loathing in sheffield so far.

Rubes - good luck with the nursery. I guess you'll have a gut feel when you see it

WG - what a treat to hear from you and what a wonderful post. Thoroughly enjoyed reading it. Well done you coping with two all the time. You are wonderwoman!

Lady - know what you mean about feeling sad all the time. It's just there constantly. And when I start thinking happy thoughts about the house, or something to do with the girls, the thought of Dad creeps in and makes me feel sad again. He wouldn't want that, but I can't help it. Ho hum.

We're off to Cumbria tonight with the inlaws. The whole lot of them. Both SILs and their kids and MIL and FIL. What a treat. Actually, sure it'll be nicer than I expect. But I could really do without it. I don't really want sympathy and kindness and nor do I want to be with someone else's family, when I really want to be with mine. God, that sounds spoilt, doesn't it? It'll be a lovely weekend, though, I'm sure. Will be offline til Monday though.

I slept for 9 straight hours last night. Was amazing. First time it's happened in ages. Bliss.

Am reading something called The Passage. It's got really good crits. Meant to be a bit like The Stand by Stephen King or something. A good old epic. And apparently first of a trilogy. Wow. It's a big old book, too.

Mum got the all lear thanks or asking Lady Lets def make a plan as I don't have much on this month.

Urgh, I'm really up in the air about it. The nursery is massive, so many staff, so many kids, just huge, and his current one is nice, and small - ish, and personal in comparison (although I've always thought his current one is huge, but really not I guess.....) I have to decide fast.
To add to it we had decided not to move, then a house we really liked has come back on and going to look at it tonight No idea why, when DH will only be moving workplace north to Hertfordshire next year, and this place is slightly South! But tis lovely, and a lot of house for the money.....

Hope you can enjoy the trip away a little Beans. I can imagine what you mean though.

Hello WG

Ooh, Rubes - might you be moving to Hertfordshire then? That's where our new house is! How exciting!

Beans - S's godmother is from that area, leads to endless hilarity - "where do you live?" 'Ware' "No, that's what I just asked you" etc etc :)

I can picture the long winter evenings flying by with those jokes, JJ!!!

Off to Cumbria shortly. Big love to all

xx

Not sure if we will Beans, dh might just commute there. He's not there until 12 mths from now so if we do, I'm excited you'll be there! Just looked at that house we liked near here. Bit rough round the edges but we like it and probably apply tommorow.
Have a lovely time away, hope you get more rest.

I am having so much trouble keeping up. I have been reading the last few days but just can't seem to get a chance to post.

WG your message to our Beans & Lady was so moving, such a lovely calming tone to your wording. Very special. I am getting ridiculously excited about your DHs series. I'm feeling like I'm running out of funnies to watch and you are giving me a lifeline. I am telling anyone who will listen that the mother of all funny shows is coming and we will all be saved with its hilarity. I'm sorry your on your own, but it's for a good cause, stiff upper lip and all that :o

Rubes, I think you need to go with the place you are happy to drop them off with (or happy for DH to drop them) and feel comfortable for the LO's to spend their day there. Although DH will be close to them at the hospital one, he may not always be available if there is a need to call him. The house thing sounds exciting, does that effect the decision at all?

Lady your trip to London sounded heavenly, you fit so much into one trip. DH has to come to London to sort out a lease change over for our flat. I wish I could come with him. Would love another sneaky catch up.

JB if there is anything else I can do with this latest BF ishoo, please let me know. I could ramble on about this but I won't bore. Speaking of which I am missing it, occasionally DS2 asks for it and I so want to give him some, but I know its over and I have to leave it that way. I'm still so grateful for my nursing career but DS2 & I have a new relationship now and that's nice. Oh and Rubes, I'm not losing weight rapidly but I am definitely looking slimmer. I put a pair of undies onto today which turned out to be too big! Woop Woop. Anyway so it must have been the BF, not that I would have stopped any earlier, its such a short time to have to wait, and I'm glad I did.

Right must go to sleep, busy tomorrow and want to fit in a long run. My PT is away for a week and I missed Tuesday because I was sick, so I am a bit behind in the look fit for trip home plan. But I'm feeling better so will do a bit of running until my next PT sesh.

Right I'm orf.

Oh and Spot, how's the house.

Trace, where art thou, how are things?

Right I'm really orf

hi rubes!

trace - meant to say, what you said made me really worry about you. please talk to people about it and keep letting us know how you are doing. even if it is just a couple of words. thinking of you, love.

and lady - you are right, in all the whirlwind, i forgot to say HURRAH HURRAH HURRAH, they are really making dh's series and it is AMAAAAAZING! he's getting to the end of a gruelling 5 weeks and so people are all getting ratty with each other and he's worried about this and that, which is why i forgot to say yay yay yay. i've been to see him on set a couple of times and in spite of enormous budgetting problems the costume and set people have done WONDERS and the actors are fantabulous! it is so thrilling to see. i will be letting people know it is on when we know. and as for Stephen rhymes with Cry - it's all well and good him presenting a series all about the wonders of language and speech, when he neglects to learn dh's lines. luckily his paraphrasing is pretty good, but dh was not well pleased. he also burns the candle at every end going - dh reckons in an effort to keep his well-publicised demons at bay.

beans - good luck in cumbria

anyway, we're now twice through the peppa pig dvd and it is time to get out and about.

love to all.

Gosh, I feel like Vaj and struggling to keep up - everytime I think I'm there lots more lovely chat pops up. But surely I've managed it now?! If I have missed anyone, I'll start with a wave to you

Beans and LadyT, I'm continuing to think of you both. LadyT have you spoken to your Dad yet? And I agree with Vaj, both AAA and Waiting's experiences were a privilege to read - heart warming and heart breaking all at the same time

So tragic about the school Dad Vaj, has DS1 said how his friend is doing?

Good news about the house Beans and so exciting. Will you be able to take your Dad to see it? It would be lovely to create some memories with him, such as a chat in the garden or lunch in the village pub. Enjoy Cumbria

L is very funny Jolly, as is the willy biting episode in the Jam household. DD has come out with some crackers recently as well, my favourites this week have been "you can't come to my party Mummy, it's only for men with peacock feathers" and, on stealing a carrot from the veg rack, "I've got a carrot so now I just need a horse to give it to"

Have you seen that 'expert' before Jolly? if not, it sounds like he's jumping to conclusions. If it was me, I'd be more comfortable taking advice from the other team who know your history. Are you feeling ok, or is it affecting your health?

Welcome back Rubes, it's lovely to see you popping up lots! Providing you like the nursery near to DHs work, I'd go for that. As someone else said, in a real emergency you and DH would drop everything to get there, and otherwise I can't see an extra 20 minutes or so driving for MIL would make much difference. Where are the nurseries in relation to the possible new house? Phew for the all clear for your Mum

And WG too, so lovely to 'see' you. You're doing marvellously to get through the whole day without DH. Does he get weekends off, or is it really 24/7? Have a wonderful break next week. I'm due mid Feb BTW

LadyT you'll either be impressed with this or think I'm a complete tyrant! It turns out that not only am I trying to teach DD to be independent, but she is also becoming my slave - yesterday she managed to empty the bottom rack of the dishwasher item by item and put it away while I stood back and made myself a cuppa supervised. Excellent! . (before I am reported, I haven't actually trained DD to do the dishwasher, she's always sneaked stuff out so taught herself, honest). And the dawdling walking pace suits me just fine at the mo. If that do was a BBC one, then VoiceOver man was surely there for Big Barn Farm rather than CDWM? He is certainly popular with the Dec 08 ladies

Work sounds tough AAA, you need a special advent calendar to count down from now to 16th December! Don't talk to me about DH's working too much, I'm having similar issues. I wish my DH wasn't always so serious about his 'provider' role and had a better balance of providing and actually being there. I'm sure I will bore you all with it at some point when I need to vent. Anyways, I've gone off at a tangent, I loved your name suggestions, thanks, and overall am leaning towards the shorter names now. Still lots of time to change my mind though!

Trace how are you doing this week? You've been quiet this week. And also we've not heard from Trudy for ages - I hope you're not working too hard?

BTW I saw Indith on another thread and think she is clackered with no 3, which is lovely

So, star chart progress - it's working for me and I'm feeling more of a positive Mummy than negative Mummy and it's nice to encourage with a reward than threaten and punish all the time. I was quite lenient last week, as I wanted to show DD what she could earn, and if she didn't do as I asked I ignored her, did something else and then asked again later until she did comply. She is more satisfied with a sticker to wear, so she gets a star on her clothes as well as on the chart, but earned herself Mr Tumble's spotty bag, with thanks to the current Something Special magazine. She is a proper bag fiend and will either spend her life maxing credit cards on the latest It bag or be a crazy bag lady, storing all her rubbish in there!

Hello everyone. Sorry to say that Dad died this afternoon. He was discharged and all seemed good for him beginning chemo, then he went downhill fast. I saw him yesterday afternoon and we had a lovely chat and he was fairly woozy and didn't realise how bad things were, which I think was a blessing. He had a good night's sleep and slipped into unconsciousness this morning. So, far from having a few months, it's happened very fast. I think that once he knew how ill he was, his mind chucked in the towel. Anyway, I feel pretty bad and might not be on for a few days. As I mentioned it's the anniversary of DH's death on Mon so not a great time of year. Have a good weekend all. And hug your loved ones.

Oh Lady all my love my lovely friend, completely understand you taking sometime. We are always here when you need us, you know that. Love and sympathy to your family esp you step mum. Look after yourself.