dec 2008- Who will stonk it in & be crown queen of the thread?

[HRHvagolaJahooli]

He we are ladies though I may need to change my name as royal title may be stripped.

Hello, hello, hello

First up, Vag, can you write in big bold letters the date of the evening you want to meet-up in London? I will then copy it in even bigger letters onto my calendar and sit back and look forward to it.

And Vag do not be so hard on yourself re your treatment of the boys. You can't underestimate the pressure that comes from having a volatile child to care for. As we have many times observed, the dispositions of your Ds1 and my DD1 are similar, as are those of our DC2's. I know I would be a calmer more consistent mum if I had two like DD1 and although I adore DD2 she regularly pushes me to my limits (& my limits aren't pretty). We do our best but we are only human and it's natural to get cross when faced with extreme screeching, crossness and disobedience.

Rubes, I'm glad you DS had fun yesterday. The separation fuss may continue though. DD2 is happy as Larry with her nanny but still can get upset when I leave - separations are just hard for some kids.

Re packed lunches. We found slices of homemade pizza were perfect. I would make it on a Sunday, hide veggies under the cheese, then wrap up a slice a day for the first three days of the week. Homemade sausage roles and pasties were also winners (again you can hide veggies in a pasty). Cold pasta pesto is an easy back-up (named pasta salad but truthfully nothing more than cold leftovers). DD1's school is a sweet, chocolate and crisp free zone so treats included flavoured rice cakes, pots of dried granola, dried fruit, smoothies etc. All this is in the past tense as I found packed lunches a right faff so she is on school dinners now.

Can I have a tiny boast? DD1 read her first chapter book this week! I could die with pride as she only turned five three weeks ago. I know wider MN would accuse me of being a competitive mum and valuing something that just happens naturally for some and not others etc etc etc so I would never mention in RL. However, I do think it's something special when you first see your child get absorbed in a proper book.

Ah. Rubes. Your DH is then considerably better at DIY than mine! No way we could do that! V impressed though. Thank you for offer of electrician's help - might well take you up on it!

Vag - try not to fret about being a scary mum. I'm guessing you're a lot less scary than you think you are, but it is horrific. I, too, am sometimes shocked by how furious I get with DD1 and feel like I could be violent. At those points, I walk away if I can. Although she does get the odd smack and I feel terrible afterwards. She's not that badly behaved either, poor little mite. Just v rude at times. But pleeeease don't feel badly about it. Also, I do think it helps them to know that there are boundaries and they can't just do what they want when they want. Certainly makes them into nicer people when they get older. You are NOT breaking them. Don't even think that.

Please could I know the date of the night out too? It's our anniversary on 13th, so not 100% sure I'll be able to make it as DH and I usually go out on the Friday after, but hopefully we'll do it on the night this year...

AAA - I'd be really proud too. What a gorgeous thing to witness. I can't wait for DD1 to start reading and am tempted to teach her myself next year! Mum did it for me and it was an amazing gift for me as I read ceaselessly now. She already sits and "reads" (recites) The Three Little Pigs for me and I love it!

Sybs - are you ok? You're only round the corner from me. Please please please drop in whenever you're feeling the stress of it. We're around most of the time and if you just give me a call, I can either look after you here, or if I'm going out, you're so welcome to use the house while I'm not here too. Thinking of you.

And don't forget, after 40, you start counting backwards in age. My sister turned 39 last week!

xx

Morning all,

Vaggie my love, please dont think that you are so not failing those boys as a mother. You are a brilliant mum. I think we all have moments where we trun screechy and can feel our blood boiling I know that myself I have shouted at my boys and have grabbed them a bit too roughly when they have been driving me insane. Its hard work being at home all the time. Boys especially are so spirited and strong willed and appear to be able to push every button they can. Well I know my 2 do. Big old squishy hug to you.

Oh and yes bold the dates you are over would love to get together.

Blimey Rubes thats one hell of a home DIY project.

Beans good luck with your house DIY stuff, v brave. OH and am loveing the cutey pie pics on FB of your two. Just gorgeous.

SL helllllooooooooo thought we had lost you. Thank god its only work. That is a ginormous pain in the arse about the lunches thing.

AAAA that is soo lovely about DD1 boast away I cant wait for DS1 to start doing proper reading books.

Invis how is DS finger did it all take ok.

Effie how is W going still stroppy or a bit better this wk?

All good here fantastic wedding at the weekend. Was just so delighted for my friends. Brilliant time was had by all and I think I have found a cure to hangovers. Chug a bottle of fat coke and a bottle of water take 3 nurofen and go to sleep wake u in the morning and voila no hangover.

Ds1 is doing really well at school is super happy to go and the whinging in the afternoons is getting less although I would say he is a long way off being ready to go full time yet. I do have a little bug bear though. I dont want to feel like a pushy mum but they are using the Ginn reading scheme which I am a little about as it is almost as old as me but anyway they bring a new no word book home every day but DS1 has twice brought home a book he has already read. Would you not as a teacher ensure they are not bringing the same book home more than once and especially not the wk after they have first had it? Obviously have not said anything as I fear in a small village school it would mark me out as being a stroppy cow who is interfering.

DS2 on the other hand is now sobbing when I drop him off at nursery I think its because he misses DS1. I am doing the mean mummy quick kiss and walk away.

Right I have an hour and half to clean the downstairs before I take the pooch for a walk then pick up the boys. This rock and roll lifestyle I lead is so draining.

Just went to take some boots back to H&M for DD1 and left them at home. Total twerp. V annoying. So went to Sainsburys. Set DD2 free, turned my back to put something on the conveyor belt from buggy for all of 3 seconds and she'd gone when I turned around. Was SO terrified. Had about a minute of total panic, then she reappeared. Didn't cry in there, but got into the car and sobbed. Hideous.

Hello ladies, got back last night from exhausting Cornwall/London trip. Scrabbling to catch up with everything and only have this afternoon and tomorrow and then we are off to York on Friday morning, so hoping to do big catch up later today.

Hey, I saw our newest thread baby yesterday - Pingu's DD2! I suggest that anyone wavering about having three shouldn't go anywhere near her as she is far, far too adorable. Pingu and I had a quick whizz around the Hollywood photo exhibition at the National Portrait Gallery (really nice to see you, Pingu, and you look great).

Glad DS is settling in Rubes, that is great news! Have to collect DD1 in an hour. It struck me this morning that she isn't good at mixing yet. AAA, that is so lovely about the reading. Sybs, I hope you are drinking deep from the hipflask today.

Have tons to say to everyone so will be back later.

Had such a lovely afternoon poddling on the common with DD2. She walked ;miles and is now knackered, but still going strong. Pushing her pushchair round the garden. DD1 goggling Charlie and Lola. Had early bath as DD2 had done massive poo and DD1 going into gentle meltdown without her snooze at nursery. She had massive tears and even did a wee on the landing, poor lamb. First time since bank holiday that she's had an accident.

I feel exhausted, despite having a fairly lazy day. Never mind. Think am getting used to being awake in the night, though. Only twice last night, which doesn't seem too bad. I think if we ignored DD2 she'd probably learn not to wake crying, but last night I left her for a minute and got worried she'd wake DD1. We left her to cry at bedtime as it was clearly just for attention and she was fine.

Am reading Jed Rubenfeld's new book - Death Instinct. Am enjoying it more than his first one, which I still enjoyed - The Interpretation of Murder. Put DD2 in her new jeggings from H&M today. They looked hilarious! Very silly. And are far too big round her waist, but I like them anyway! Proper little dude!

Right, off to do milk and cuddling. DH insisting I keep them up til he gets home from work and DD1 so needs to be asleep. BUT then she'd be up at 6 tomorrow, so will hang on til 7 if she can.

Wow. Stream of very boring consciousness. Sorry.

Lady - looking forward to reading your catch up later. Always enjoy them. How was the Cornwall trip? Was it as emotionally draining as you thought? Hope you are ok.

Meant to say, Vag, am delighted you think of me at poo-related incidents. Nice to be thought of for anything!

DD1 has just declared "Mummy, it's Sick Four Too Late!" Her favourite programme. Also insisted that I sing it. She loves me singing along to the theme tune. Fine by me. I also love singing along to it. "Sing it Mummy - LOUDER!". Brilliant. Have always thought I'd be rather marvellous on X-Factor. Sadly am far too middle class and happy to get through. Oh and not very good at singing. But I don't have a sob story to make me appealling. Bugger.

Sybs - are you ok?

PS - in case I am too cryptic, Sick Four Too Late is: 64 Zoo Lane!

beans I love your chatter! And Sick Four Too Late is very funnny! P loves By Dam (Fireman Sam!) and bebbabi (peppa pig!). I was thinking about her words earlier actually. She has some cute little words which I totally understand, but I guess others wouldn't, such as 'bicbish' for breakfast and 'eye-buddy' for rice pudding! She loves rice pudding She is lacking a fair few sounds but never really stops chatting these days, and I just love listening to her
We got feedback from the lady who viewed our house, and basically it was the location that put her off, but anyway we have got another viewing tomorrow, by a couple who have accepted an offer on their house, so it's proceedable, as they say! So I have to make it look all nice and appealing again before I go to work tomorrow (eek!)
I think I've got a lump in my neck, in the hollow bit above my collar bone. I think it's probably a gland, but I've not had any sore throat or infection or anything that would cause it to swell. And it doesn't hurt at all. Odd. I'm tempted to go to the GP, but it's only about 2 weeks since I was there saying I thought I had a brain tumour (P reckons I don't have one!), so I would feel rather daft going again so soon with another crazy worry. Hmmm.

Beans you're quite wrong, it's clearly actually called Lucy Four Zoo Lane (at least according to s). I do love to hear about your lovely girls, they make me smile

Well slrry for being away so long, things have been a bit mad as we're moving house next week [eek] and dh has the first concert on saturday of the new choir he set up. Has just come downstairs from trying to print the programmes, printer being a bastard (as they generally do)

Am now going to have to be rubbish and quit again as sausages ready at last. Fnar. But i promise tomorrow when dd naps (as she is quite good at, thank god, still pants at night) i will catch up.

• enjoy the sausages - hope they're worth the wait!

is this the same woman who was stalking Vaggie?

Happy birthday Sybs for this week ? what day is the big day? I hope you get treated to lots of nice things. Bless your builders for being so kind

I?m still on for this weekend LadyT and Trace (and Jolly too?) When fits in with your schedule LadyT? I?m hoping not to have E with me, but can?t guarantee whether DH will find some tractoring to do and leave her with me. I?m really looking forward to it . I am very of you meeting tiny Pingu, I hope you gave her a big sloppy kiss from me?

Trace shouldn?t laugh, as it sounds rather painful, but L complaining of a wedgy did make me smile! And what is wrong with your location? There is a lovely view across the fields for goodness sakes, I bet the houses down the road don?t get that. Silly woman

On the dryer dilemma AAA, we don?t have one but manage with the washing line (and avid viewing of the weather to work when to wash), plus a drying rack inside. All I?d say, if you don?t have a dryer, don?t solve the problem by putting your clothes directly onto radiators ? DD has been given a lovely bag of hand me downs and all the winter stuff that wouldn?t go on the line got flung over radiators to dry and now it is all crispy and crunchy and I don?t think it?ll be comfortable for DD to wear. That makes me sound v ungrateful, complaining about the person who actually spent the money on the clothes in the first place for not taking good care of them , I don?t mean it that way, I?m just giving an example of what not to do. Oh, I?ll shut up and stopping digging my hole

Packed lunches ? I am so grateful that nursery do breakfast, lunch (hot meal, 3 courses including a proper pudding with custard) and tea (hot meal in winter, cold in summer) plus 2 daily snacks. DD would die of something linked to do with my lack of imagination if I was responsible for coming up with varied meals. I have just learnt that the pre school only allows packed lunches, but school dinners are available for the reception class upwards. That means no full days at pre school for DD, only mornings or afternoons, I cannot be faffed with making pack ups. I am mighty impressed with all the suggestions here ? I will introduce a few at home I think (for me as well as DD ? yum!)

Invis ? I thought Jarvis had a good 10 years on me, but v pleased to hear that it?s more than that and I cannot be classed as ?veteran? along with him

Beans I was so proud of DD when she started telling me when she?d done a poo, and she was almost 2 ? P is only just 1, a wonder child in the making! And talking of wonder children ? well done biggest AAA girl on the reading. I am with you so much on getting pleasure from seeing DD enjoying books ? not that she?s reading yet (now that would be something to brag about ), but she pretends to, and loves to leaf through a book in bed herself, after my story and before I turn the light off, and it is so lovely to see her absorbed in it. Oh, and littlest Summer quacks ? again, very impressive! Also pleased to hear that Jam boy is enjoying school so much

Crikey Rubes, you and your DH are DIY gods. My DH can barely change a light bulb, I can go so far as to paint a wall or hang a shelf (but only if it will have light stuff on it, I don?t trust myself if it has to bear a load), so we spend too much on other people. An example being we have a decorator in at the moment to do the kitchen and DD?s new bedroom ? I?m trying to keep out of the way as much as possible (DD and I HAD to go out for lunch today, and we had the loveliest time doing lunch together. She was so thrilled that we rang DH and she shouted ?I?m in the cafe? down the phone, Triggerhappy style). DD however loves Mr F (the decorator) and spends the whole time asking ?what?s Mr F doing? now what?s Mr F doing? Mr F read me a story a naptime?? etc etc ? I?m surprised he hasn?t throttled her yet

Beans your friends are crazy, a weekend away sounds lovely. We?ve got one planned with the girls for next month and I can?t wait. And you probably don?t want to know this, but as it?s you, I?ll share ? I went off 64 Zoo Lane recently, when I couldn?t get the song out of my head whilst DH and I were ?enjoying ourselves?, it was so off putting. I try to avoid watching it now, just in case it ever happens again

Vaj agree with all the others ? sometimes we get pushed too far. I confessed to my Mum that I cried in front of DD when she was pushing me recently, expecting to be shot down in flames (my Mum is an ex nanny of the supernanny, starched uniform, variety) and she just said that children need to realise we are human too and see what happens when the line is crossed ? and it was definitely far more effective with DD than me saying ?that makes Mummy sad, do you want Mummy to be sad??, which gets the toddler equivalent of ?whatever? in response. So don't beat yourself up, and remember the 23.75 other hours in the day when you were loving and kind and fun

Good luck with the move 8Jump*

I was going to type a long post about the lovely day I?ve had with DD today etc etc, but my fingers are tired now. So will just say we?ve had fun. Oh, and remind to tell you about the amazing princess party that we (she) was invited to at the weekend ? every girl needs one! Bed time now as I am working until 10pm tomorrow (starting at 830am, as usual), night night ladies

Hello loves. Back as promised, but shatterbanged.

Oh ZJ Before you said that I was just thinking how irritatingly catchy the tune was but it was obviously that bit more catchy to you, ha ha ha. Right, will be sooper dooper to see you and Trace on Sat - and Jolly, though I realise it's a long way for her so if you can't make it, Jolly, I will understand! Basically, I would love to see you all for hours and hours but am trying to be very diligent to see and do as much as I can so I have lots to write about for my piece...We are probably going to a matinee at the Theatre Royal in the afternoon (after several hours of sightseeing!) so I will check what time that will finish (4.30ish?) and might we then meet nearby? Where is a good spot? DP will say hello very briefly then slope back off to the hotel and leave us in peace. Oh, and if anyone needs to bring little ones, obviously it's fine by me!

Beans, your friends are such fainthearts for not wanting to have a night away. What a shame. I miss mine like the clappers when I am parted from them even briefly. But it's good for all concerned to have a break!

Thank you, the weekend was less emotionally draining than I had anticipated. But this poor lady is still in a bad way. Being on her own with two small children has obviously made it all so very much harder. It's awful. And Cornwall is just....so far from everywhere else, including all her family who are near London. Anyway, on a lighter note, we went to the Tate Gallery in St Ives (um, disappointing but glad I've been) and to a couple of beaches and had some Rick Stein fish and chips (ok, I just had chips). DP had a work thing in London and that's why we hurtled there after Cornwall but I love it when we all go anyway.

Back in a sec, just want to post this before it vanishes...

Aaaargh, whaddya know - my big fat chatty post disappeared - I actually tried to copy it in case of disaster and then MN signed me out and it went. Grrr! Haven't got time to try to recreate it so just, sadly, in note form......

DB - packed lunches - DD1 still eats eccentrically but a hard boiled egg works for us, as do fingers of tortilla/omelette. How can you and Beans not love gin? I heart gin but I avoid spirits except as treats at Christmas etc. Mmm, a nice brandy is smashing too.

Rubes, I would love to join in on any of those things but as you can see I am stupidly hectic and overcommitted again. Is your Mum here until the end of the month or just until your birthday? Let's put our heads together when I am back from York after the weekend. And there are bound to be ups and downs with any family member visiting, no matter how much you love them and are glad to see them! Is your DS integrating well with the other kids? Not sure DD1 is. I need to speak to them about it, probably.

SL - so glad you are settling nicely back into work. Thoroughly agree about the Gaga parts of the CM book, I found them cringeworthy. As to the gutwrenchingly honest abortion bit, it confirmed what I'd alwasy suspected (I don't think I could ever go through with one).

Vag, don't be hard on yourself. DS2 is pushing the boundaries and it's your duty to show him that the boundaries are firm! How else do they learn? I hate telling DD1 off. DP thinks I am too soft. But it's important that they know how we are all expected to behave, or else they just run riot. As long as kids know you love them, all is well. And I would stake anything on yours knowing that!

Invis, how is DS's finger shaping up? Going to buy the new Julian Barnes at some point - it's only a novella, so right up my street? Are you reading the Booker shortlist this year?

AAA - quite right to feel proud of DD1, not sure exactly why we feel the need to hide it. I sort of get it of course, but really, its only natural and no crime to take pleasure in their achievements. I feel a bit the same as DD is just starting to figure out reading and its so exciting watching her and thinking of a lifetime's pleasure in books to come.

Also quite proud of DS, who has been dry for a whole week, just in time for starting preschool next week. Thanks for asking jam finger is more or less healed now and no longer in giant bandage. Its all been a bit of a long saga - can't remember if I posted at the time, tip didn't take and there was a second op to take the icky bit off, so he will have pirate finger. There was a comedy sunday night a few weeks ago where the bandage came off by accident and we were all flapping about slightly horrified at the sight of it poor lamb. Its mostly a bore as he is still going in to hospital clinic every week. Just for you beans, tomorrow's clinic is called "hand therapy". Honestly.

Vaj - we all lose it from time to time, we wouldn't be human if we didn't and in a funny way, it is part of our DCs education.

jump - good luck with the house move!

zj - so nice to see your cheery post!

Rubes - I am in awe of your DIY competence. I come from a long line of the domestically useless. I remember my sister living in a room plunged in pitch blackness for about a year (I am not exaggerating) until my DH finally couldn't bear it and stepped in and changed the lightbulbs. I had a kitchen where I put up with no oven for more than a year because I was convinced it was broken. then I read the instructions

LadyT - your weekend sounds gruelling - I'm sure your trip down was really appreciated though. I kind of know what you mean about the tate st ives - if you go thinking "TAte" it is kind of disappointing. But it depends what is in there and the setting is special. Did you go to the Barbara Hepworth garden? That is rather charming.

x-posted Ladyt. I am in dire need of something to read (thanks beans for your tip - i also kind of enjoyed interpretation of a murder, didn't know there was a new one). I expect I will work my way through the booker list - there is usually a discounted book people pack that comes on just after the prize is announced, so will have to wait. Interested in the hollinghurst which was much trailed but didn't make the cut. Not sure I exactly liked line of beauty, but it has stuck with me.

I love reading all your posts. Hello Invis

Did we decide on a date to meet the Vagmeister in town? Would Thurs 13th be possible? Beans I knopw that that is your anniversary, but you said you celebrated on the Friday.....anyhow, subject to beans, can we put that in? Cd do Fri 14th if Beans and Vag can do that??? With the babysitters down here, you need to book early to avoid disappointment.

Sorry to charge in and screw down a date, but I know how time drifts and then I'll be too late to get anyone and I've missed SO many meetups and things.

Thanks for all the kind birthday wishes. It's on Sat. I am still young (ish).

Love to you all.

Some more -

ooh, best of British with the housemove, JJ. Are you both in more than one choir or will your DH's new one be the only one?

How are you today, Sybs - bit mroe chipper?

Jam - what is this Ginn reading scheme? And that does sound a bit crap. I can see myself getting reet irritated about such things. As you know, I have the same problem as you (tiny village school, tricky to rock the boat, though I think it's almost inevitable that I do so at some point).

DD1's stutter has gone from g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-Granville to Geeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr-anville. Poor baby.

I am starting to think 2011 is the year of me being in a bad mood. I feel almost permanently vexed. I suppose it's because I have got a lot going on. When the two flats are finished and rented out I will feel relaxed (and able to press on with finishing our actual house) but I think I am going to be a total Stress Monkey well into the new year. I just feel I am cramming more and more into less and less time, but achieving little. Anyway, need to get myself off to bed and calm down before sleep. Night all.

Lady - for what its worth, DS's stutter was that bad - he virtually couldn't get a word out for a while, but it vanished just as suddenly as it came on. And don't be too hard on yourself. You always come on here and sound like an unbelievable whirlwind of activity. I can't even begin to understand how you manage all that you do. I know that doesn't make it any less stressful, but really, you are doing an incredible job. And have the most gorgeous DDs

syb - many happy returns!! Either 13 or 14 fine for me if its an evening out - would really love to meet you lovely ladies!

Ooooh, lots of cross posts! Exciting.

Thurs 13th is ok with me so far as I know, Sybs, even if I have to get the much mentioned 2148 train home. Ditto the Fri actually. Are you doing something nice for your birthday?

Invis, I am still so sorry about your DS's finger. Heavens above, the lad is such a brave soldier. We didn't go to the Barbara Hepworth garden (doh!) But there was a Martin Creed piece which was a massive room FILLED with balloons (the kids enjoyed it but actually I found it really claustrophobic) and one or two other interesting bits but generally it was a bit anaemic, somehow. Amazing views from the top of the place, though - a work of art in themselves.

Right - am telling myself - "Bed, at once!"

We saw the balloons in June when we went. DS REALLY loved it, in fact he still talks about it. But I agree with you I was very claustrophobic, left the boys to it!

Was the room there were everyone was measuredand their heights annotated on the wall? Loved that one. We were all done!

Yup - we're all there too. Funny to think we are all recorded on the same bit of wall in cornwall

Good morning lovely ladies!

I doubt I have time for a proper catch up before work but I'll try!

lady What an exhausting weekend (by my standards). Re: DD1 mixing at school, I know when DS started his playgroup (where I leave him) his key worker said that at his age they tend to play on their own and eventually they learn to integrate...although I/she may well be wrong. I suspect she is just weighing everyone up.

Invis Your poor DS what a brave little man he has been, truly.

vag Yes scary mum, she is a regular here. I hate myself for it but children push you to your absolute limit at times and then try a bit more. You are a smashing mum end of.

JJ Good luck with the move. And beans have you had your offer accepted or did I miss that?

AAA Super news on DD's reading. My DD is the same age as yours, and although she can read her school books, no way she could handle a book with actual chapters. Good for her.

Thanks for all the packed lunch ideas, I am trying to change it a bit. so far so good but by gosh its a faff!

I have a meeting at work to discuss my 'role' sounds a bit . No idea what to expect!

Right, hi-ho its off to work I go

Just a quickie til later - I think I can do 14th!!! Definitely can't do 13th as DH has said we're going out that night now. But hopefully 14th is ok.

xxxx