Dec 08 - tears, tantrums, giggles and piddles - and that's just the mums!

[traceface]

Or maybe piddling whilst giggling is just me?
It's so sunny here I feel Spring has sprung - where's that daffodil emoticon gone? Had a friend round this morning for a natter and cake - muchos snot and tears but all good. Think I might go for a little bike ride now to blow the cobwebs away.
And no vag - not a chance!
rubs don't you dare spend all your time tweeting - your first loyalty is here!

Hello everyone, I amsorry not to be keeping up very well. I have a new phone which should make it a bit easier! Bit hard to type though so will have to return on rhe laptop later on. L declared she wanted to start at a new nursery today. I thought she'd enjoy my maternity leave, maybe not!

Oh wow. Just ate a mint magnum. I bought two, one for me and one for DH. But now I want to eat his... I hadn't told him I'd got it... Maybe I just scoff it and not tell him about it..........

No, have not eaten it. Have made some Betty Crockett brownies instead. Drooool.

Oh shit, DD2 waking up. Bum. Better go.

Arti - my DD1 similar to your DD2 in that will not wear her pants if she can possibly help it. Apart from her Peppa Pig ones and that's only outside. And she's horrible to get dressed at the moment - summer dresses are the winners. I'm not.

JJ - Glad that DH might be able to come home earlier of an evening .

PD - loved the description of your LOs. How is Princess Colin today? Or has she morphed persona again?

I have no airing cupboard [sniff] but I do have many other parts of my house in chaos .

Arti - that is the sweetest story about your DD and her teacher. See you later alligator bott bott also delightful!

Going back to DS and his speech, I think that because I so expected the HV to say there was nothing to worry about, I was taken aback by her proactive get him referred quick attitude. Especially as she was not giving off that just to be on the safe-side vibe but maybe that's just the way she is. DS understands what I say to him quite well and will follow two-step commands. However, he only says at the most 10 words that a non-family member would understand. He is a very talkative chap but just babbles on in his own little language, some of which I understand but not all. The HV has suggested DS and I watch Mr Tumble together (arghhhh!).

Just caught up.and wanted to say urbane I do hope all is well with your neice. If I can help with any info or support do let me know. Bc is hard at first with tiny mouths. Bf that is, damn phone!

argh. I just came v close to slapping dd1. DH has a work meeting tonight (so much for the being back in the evenings!) and headed off while she was having tea. She then started shrieking, not actually saying anything, just making a very loud "eeeeee" noise. I'd already explained that owing to feck all sleep last night (dd2 up at 5...), I had a headache and she needed to be nice to mummy. General disobedience, cheek and rudeness followed, kicking me when I took her shoes off. Said if she screamed again, there would be no stories. she screamed again... then started shouting that she wanted stories. I said straight to bath and bed, she could earn a story back by doing what I asked her, when I asked. Obviously not. DD2 of course using this time to roll onto her front and then get very cross and scream herself, adding to the peaceful atmosphere. So try to give dd1 another chance to do what she's asked, if she comes into her room quickly and gets her sleepy bag off the bed she can have a story. Instead she does her usuyal hedstand on the chair (!), totally ignores me, and when I have to manhandle her down off the chair she slapped me. I was so close to just slapping her back.

:( have left her upstairs with lights out, she's just come and thrown her cup of milk down the stairs. And bedtime about an hour earlier than usual lights out. Time for the I think :(

Hello Jolly, good to see you back!

Nolda, when I took O to the HV last year about the poor eating and the lack of walking she said of the latter "I must refer her!" in just about the dramatic voice possible. So it was discovered she had 'loose ligaments' but they were clutching at straws, I think, really. And as you know, she was just two months short of two before she walked, but - will anyone know or care about that by the time she starts school? I doubt it! Bet it will be just like that with your DS.

Did you eat the Magnum, Beans?

Princess Colin has a real ring to it. Though I do keep thinking of C. Firth in drag.

Arti, I hear what you say re: choice of hospitals. The Portland was not really an experience I ever fancied, I have to say...

DP sent his sister in Bermuda a pic of DD2 and she said she looks like Les Dawson I am amazed by how much this has irritated me

Rubes, I wish I had your cleaning skills. But when we finally move I am going to try to keep more on top of housework (plus it will be much easier, with more space).

Anyone up for The Apprentice tonight? DB, you can usually be persuaded!

OK slimming gurus, so I had toast with Flora Light for breakfast, two Ryvita, some cottage cheese, tomatoes about eight peanuts for lunch and an apple for a snack. Plus various coffees and low-cal squash. I won't go large for supper and it will be carb free/lite (most likely artichokes and Quorn frankfurters). OK, I might have a Pimms as well, with Diet Lemonade. This is a pretty typical day for me. And yet I still manage to stay Lardsville Tennessee. Admittedly my only exercise was a half hour walk. I guess that's not enough.

Oh JJ X-posted. That sounds very, very trying indeed. Poor you. Pour yourself a big one and hope for a better day tomorrow. These nippers really know when to push it sometimes, don't they? Hugs to you.

dd2 now asleep on my chest, all quiet from upstairs. It's so hard as a lot of the time dd1's an absolute delight, chatty and funny and saying "I love you mummy" but she really knows how to push my buttons. Grrr. And I'm not strong enough to step back and be patient when she's repeatedly ignoring/being deliberately wilful. Have seen those threads that say Offer your child choices and this will solve all problems - eg when we were walking to town today, the choices were a) Hold my hand and walk, or b) Stand on the buggy board. She opted for c) lie on the floor waliling. So how long do you wait (bearing in mind dd2 in buggy crying, so I can't be all eternally patient and playful) before having to manhandle her up and carry her as that's the only way to get anywhere?

Hello again,

On laptop now, much better, although balancing DD2 on my chest.

urbane What I was trying to say earlier was that if your SIL has anything re neo natal babies she wants a reassuring voice on just say. 34 weeks means she will probably be out very soon and it will all be about learning to bf (or bottle feed!). If she does BF it does take longer to master and you have days when they just fall asleep without managing to feed at all and it is very frustrating. It feels like forever when they are on the unit but it goes in the blink of an eye!

JJ Sleep deprivation is awful and certainly saps me of my patience and energy. DD1 will wake up tomorrow and will have forgotton all about it. Please don't beat yourself up. DD1 likes to stamp on the floor (wooden) to attempt to wake DD2 and I've been so close to hugely losing my temper. Don't laugh anyone but I find bursting into a few verses of 'guide me o'thou great redeemer' really helps. I get to unleash my anger and make a loud noise without shouting. DD often is distracted and asks me to sing somwthing else.

One handed typing now. Excuse typos.

ZJ Wonderful news about your friend's baby! What a star.

beans Amazing you helped your friend give birth. I'd have handed over a rubbish towel to begin with!!!!

nolda It is more than likely they are just covering their backs re the referral. Please don't worry. Didn't trace have P referred for the same thing? What happened there trace?

ladyT Great progress on DD1's eating. She is doing really well. Chocolate covered seeds sound like a good idea. DD is hilariously faddy at the moment. One minute she rejects a peice of sliced apple because it has a teeny bit of skin and the next she'll eat an apple almost entirely. Very odd.

arti So cute about your DD1 and her teacher.

I'll be watching the apprentice later! Have to go now, laptop battery running low. Everything is conspiring against me! DD2 8lb 8 today - she seems huge now. Byeeeeee.

You poor thing, JJ. No advice here I'm afraid, just mucho sympathy. I have zilch patience with my two and I don't have the excuse of lack of sleep.

LadyT, would low tone mean the same as loose ligaments? My niece who will be 2 at the beginning of August isn't walking yet and the doctor says she has low tone. On the slimming, I've found that exercise and cutting out the obvious naughties is the only thing that works for me in the longterm. If I cut down too much on the calories etc, my body thinks there is some kind of famine on and has to hang on to everything it can get. But everyone is different, just look at Rubes.

Gosh JJ that is really hard, she's definitely got a good spirit that will hold her in good stead when she is older but its really hard for you right now. The choices thing definitely has its place, but I think there are times when kids need to be told what they need to do. I think they feel safer if they are told what to do, within reason. Also I think it depends on the child. DS1 always responded well to being given a choice, DS2 doesn't even listen to what the choices are incase one of them includes the word biscuit. In fact DS2 doesn't respond to anything we say unless it includes the word biscuit. We have all (inc DS1) started calling him 'biscuit' instead of his name because its a sure fire way of getting his attention.

I went for a run this afternoon and did a little 5km time trial in 29mins and 12 seconds. I'm so
cuffed with myself. It nearly killed me and I had to stop a couple of times because of a stitch but I'm pleased I can physically do it in under 30mins. My aim is to get down to 25mins.

Beans did you eat it?

Lady I hear you on the non weightloss frustration.

Arti that was so sweet about DD1 & her teacher. Isn't it amazing the impact words have on kids.

Better go dinner needs sorting.

jj chin up, deep breaths and huge glugs of the hard stuff.

LadyT woohoo for the Apprentice. Can't believe it's come around again already. Bring on the tosspots! Although I will probably have to tape it as am knackered - DS woke me up at 12.30 last night and I didn't get back to sleep till about 5. Thank heavens for Spiral - anybody else been watching that? And that does sound depressingly little to be eating & not losing weight. I am no slimming guru (obviously) but some of the people at work are looking very good on this Zumba malarkey - or is that too desperate a measure?

Rubes yes I will be bringing Princess Colin. I'll be coming in the car, possibly chauffeured by DP if we combine with a visit to one of his friends.

Arti I always think your N sounds such a character - I wonder what the 2 N's would make of each other. And that is so sweet about the teacher crush. Awww!

Beans thank you kindly. And I do write at work, as it happens. Honestly, you should read my report on the Wolverhampton Private Sector Leasing Scheme - it would have you in stitches.

JJ: there are times when I have to bundle one of the boys (or both) out of my sight before I clock one of them. In the circs I think sticking DD1 in bed was a good idea.

On the diet front, I have caved and downloaded an app. Oh yes. You put in what you eat and your exercise and it gives you a nice little chart. I lost half a pound last week which is a start. It's really the last half stone or so that I want to shed.

Eurovision semis on the telly - a repeat or has the last year gone really fast?

Well Effie, even half a pound mounts up if you can carry on. I suppose I need to exercise madly but I just can't find the time at the mo. I have been eating like a - well, a particularly healthy monk for ages but haven't lost anything of note since the hol. Sigh. I am a freak. I always feel like people look at me and think I'm a pig

Nolda, low tone must mean muscle tone. I do remember them checking DD1's muscles. Honestly, though, also the paed said she had loose ligaments (wibbly joints) I did slightly feel that they were just trying to give us a reason when they didn't really know. But I understand how anxious-making it all is.

Yep, PD, I am also hoping for a few complete twots on The Apprentice. So I can bask in the fact that I may be a slightly podgy housewife but at least I am not a gobshite in a cheap suit who splits infinitives and comes up with highly improbably metaphors to describe myself.

JJ lovey, do hope you have got your feet up.

Oops. more to say but Th'Apprentice is on.

JumpJockey that sounds gruelling - they wait til you're " " this close to snapping then push some more. Throwing the milk down the stairs would have been snapping point for me and there would have been shouting! How old is DD1?

Beans I sneaked a Magnum from the freezer the other day and managed to eat it in the garden without being spotted by DH or DD - result! DH then appeared shorty afterwards with a Magnum from the freezer for all of us, so I just ate it It would have been mean of me to spoil DH's nice warm flow of kindness by fessing up

Jolly I use singing as a displacement activity sometimes as I'm not good at staying serene through flak, and whereas DD will join in, DS just looks at me and says "that's nuff Mummy, that's nuff" - I don't think he's impressed.

Good luck to all the dieters. I've been losing that stubborn bit of weight by cutting out alcohol (yes, you did read that night - drastic measures required!), eating meals more slowly and trying to avoid sugar. I've lost and kept off a good half stone that way, and now I need to shift another half stone to get me properly and permanently under 11 stone. That probably makes me sound a real lump, but I'm quite tall and have huge norks. I'm not a keen exerciser for its own sake, but I do like to be active and on the go in the day. Does that sound like a feeble excuse for not throwing myself around at the gym?

Not watching the Apprentice, I can't bear how manipulative these programmes are. I found Theo Paphitis' programme earlier quite interesting. We run our own business so I'm always interested to see how other people run and grow their companies. I find The Apprentice exhaustingly aggressive, but that's no doubt why we're not turning over £5 million a year!

In case anyone think I'm being rood, I meant DH's nice warm GLOW of kindness!

Terrible at keeping up but want to say that I should still be good for Brighton. Can't decide if I should keep DS1 home from childminder and bring him? Taking 2 on the train may have me institutionalised! Is that even a word? Sleep dep of high orders here. At one point last night I actually put DS2's dummy in my own mouth because I was so knackered I forgot what I was supposed to be doing with it!

DS2 doing pretty well. Random mix of good and shocking nights. The main problem right now is that he is covered head to toe in eczema. Very sad. It is worst on his face. I am worried that it is something I'm eating so have gone off dairy but can't tell if it's helping yet. Got loads of creams from doctor today so hope that will help.

DH is away this week and I have survived 2 bedtimes on my own. Result! Jump, have had many of those moments myself. The only thing that helps is wine and calling him a F"@&£ng idiot under my breath. I am a terrible mother. Oh, and when DS2 is screaming, I don't bother offering DS1 choices or being patient. I manhandle straight away and bribe with raisins.

Love to all and sorry for lack of personals!

Mom eczema is really random its more likely the weather than your milk.

Nolda I meant to say earlier its probably fine but the referral won't hurt. My DS2 started talking waaaaay before DS1 (like by 6months) and he is talking loads now but he is stuttering loads, its almost like he is thinking too fast about what he wants to say and his mouth can't keep up. I'm sure its fine but I'm going to ask about it at his 2.5 year check up. He does sound very cute with it, like the old guy in 'The Vicar of Dibley', "no no no no no no no".

yay for brighton meet up! can't wait to see you all.

JJ you poor thing, souds completely grim. well done you for not doing what you felt like. i suspect i would have screamed like a banshee. whenever i do, t bursts into tears despite his initial misbehaviour being the cause of my ire. so i then feel terrible and no one's happy. oh and i also rely on manhandling as my attempts at reasoning or even just telling go ignored.

mom well done on the 2 bedtime success. was it something you did differently or were the dcs just less screamy? could do with some tips...
sorry to hear about the eczema but glad your doc has given you something to try. poor little mite .

vag am loving your moniker for biscuit boy. and v impressed with your running time.

trudy what line of business are you in? i have so much respect for people who go it alone, it must be rewarding but very hard work too.

just watched the apprentice - wasn't going to but had a row with dp and wanted to take my mind off it. now i'm hooked, goddamit!

lady no advice on the diet front i'm afraid, but it does seem like you're depriving yourself with little payback. could you be undereating and therefore slowing your metabolism down?

i tried jumping up and down in the interests of slenderness yesterday but unfortunately wet myself so better start toning my internal muscles before starting on the externals...

nolda i hope it's not too much of a worry but at least you can rule things out with the referral. do they say how long it'll take?

btw, genuine question, but what exactly is an airing cupboard?

jolly have pm-d you. Would really welcome advice - thanks for offering. Went to see them yesterday and so lovely to see the two of them together. New niece is small and beautiful and SIL seems to be on the mend. Such a relief. Slight moment of drama as it all caught up with DH and he very nearly fainted in the hospital. Whereas I worry about everything at the time he doesn't really and then suddenly realised how serious it all was. Will do proper catch up later. Feeling really sick this morning. blurgh. Jump sounds like you had quite a day of it. I love jolly's suggestion of singing. Hope today is better.

mom I agree with the point about eczema being random, it's a bugger for pinning down the cause. I've had it all my life and DS is suffering, but mainly on his legs. Oats set him off and sugar makes mine worse, but it's taken me nearly 40 years to work that out! In the warmer weather make sure LO is cool and in cotton, that's a good starting point.

spot I'm not sure how much I'm allowed without having my wrist slapped, but in a nutshell we provide hosting and managed servers for businesses, and do it all with open source software. It's an offshoot of DH's original 15 year old hosting business, which he's gradually winding down while this one grows to the point of keeping us, but the marketing and so on is a real headache. That's my job and I'm an archaeology graduate so I do my best but it's slow progress. The potential working for yourself is huge but you do need nerves of steel sometimes.

DS is still exploding from both ends so no nursery tomorrow and I'm making a limp rag look thrusting and dynamic this morning.

I'm sorry, I haven't entirely kept up with the new babies, being a new baby here myself, but it sounds like things are going well, good news.

Morning,

Yes LadyT I'm right with you on The Apprentice, I love it. DH & and I have our own 'boardroom' throughout and end up rowing debating who's the best/worst

JJ, much sympathies it can be so hard. I have days when I try to reason and days when I just manhandle DS about. But I find wine does help...hence my need to de-lard!

Spot, sorry I had an image of you doing star-jumps in your lounge which made me laugh!

Mom, DS had a really bad flare up of excema recently (as did DD who hasn't had any since she was about 2). Thenit got warm and sunny and it just seemed to clear up. Vag is right probably not what you are eating.

Hopefully back later best get DD to school, DS to GP's and me to work....RL can reallyget inth eway of my MN at times

Hmmm, well I watched The Apprentice last night and I am actually not sure I will watch it again. Its so formulaic and predictable now. The contestants are all thick as two short blanks and out for fame. What we see are charicatures which cant be a true reflection of who they really are. Plus it depresses me that the message seems to be that it doesn't matter if your thick, or talentless as long as you are nasty and money grabbing and ruthless. I refuse to believe that it's those qualities that are most important in business.

And breathe!

LadyT, your diet sounds v extreme and it's very odd you aren't losing weight if that's all your intake. I know you have PCOS, are you on metamorfin at the mo? I would talk to your endocrinologist to see if they can help. And you mustn't think people look at you as if you are a pig. Firstly, and most importantly, you are not obviously overweight and when I look at you my overriding impression is of a uber glam lady. And second, people are rarely so cruel in their thoughts. I bet you don't think "pig" everytime you see someone bigger than a size 12.

JJ, I want to write a longer post sympathising about the feelings of anger towards your older child when coping with a baby. I had v similar experiences. However, my tube is pulling into my station so it will have to wait.

And Urbs I hope the sickness passes.

morning all. Thanks to the basket for its strength as ever. (Trudy, this is a ref to the fabulous What Mothers Do which was a bible for many of us in the early days with #1, if we refer to WMD it means that rather than warheads)

Well in the end when I took dd2 up at 8 dd1 was still awake so went in and we had a cuddle and a chat, I asked why she'd ignored me and said "I was being a naughty girl" so tried explain that we love her very much but don't like the naughty things she does. Might work...! Then I had an hours kip on the bed with dd2 :) dh said he got back from his meeting, all was silent and he couldn't bring himself to wake me up!

spot, glad to hear your meet is on :) an airing cupboard is a cupd round the hot water tank with shelves that you bung your towels etc on so they're nice and warm. In my dad's house the tank was in a little outhouse by the back door, so it was full of rakes and paint etc, found it very odd to imagine anyone putting their towels there!

vag you are as always very wise. And groovy too what with the kayaking. Can I be you for a bit please?

jolly what an excelllent idea! will think of a suitably rousing hymn. We had Ye watchers and ye holy ones at our wedding, the alleluias should be good for lifting the spirit again :)

nolda, is there a sure start centre near you? Ours runs a 'little voices' group for children who are reluctant to talk, where they do nursery rhymes and songs but it's run by a speech therapist so all very carefully targeted to the needs of the invididual children.

lady your diet does sound a bit too limited tbh, as arti says would be worth checking with endo.

can see Mr ocado pulling up outside, back later. Thanks again ladies, you are all fab. When we set up our commune I will be so happy :)

I can join the ranks of angry mothers today - I was trying to clear up this morning and the boys were being royal pains. I ended up losing my rag and throwing shoes around like a naughty toddler . We have since revamped to the new adventure playground in the woods where the boys are wearing themselves out and I am feeling a lot happier.

At that point there was a major argument over the rope swing! at least we're outside...