HI
Welcome bearbrains 
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banana whats the cardboard figure thing, sounds great. I stuggle to do things with DS when Maias awake as she doean´t like to be put down too much. Are you near a library, mine has become my saving grace this winter, they have floor puzzles/colours etc not much we dont have at home but gets us out the house for an hour or so in the afternoon.
Im not weaning yet, tbh not even thinking about it, feels too early, but then Maia is on the small side and she´s doing fine with her milk so far.
mammyG big MN hug, sorry your feeling that way at the moment. Am glad you´ve got a good DH and as has been said vent away on here when you need to off load.
jessemy I use saline water drops, lay Maia down with head on one side squirt up water and then pop her back up again to wipe away water/snot, then repeat other side. It also helps to clear any mucus stuck down between nose/throat. maia doesn´t like it but it does help loads and its only water
Ok so why can DP not dress the DCs, I mean he does do it (infact he´s great with them both in terms of doing his share), its just that it looks like a blind man has fished some things out of a bin bag and dressed them. He can dress himself OK, never seen him walk out to work wearing tarten check trousers with a stripy top on (which he has out on DS before 
). The best thing is the poor sod thinks he dressed them beautifully and trots them off to the park so proudly. Ive taken to laying the next days clothes out, but he´s clicked on and picks out other things, I also lied once saying Maia had leaked and had had to change her clothes and all. 
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Im far from fashion concious, this is a question of eye dazzling colour/pattern clashes.