Dec 2008 - Hello 2011 the Year of the Toddler!

[DeidreBarlow]

Totally unispired but hope you all find it...

JJ all sounds good, shame about the expressing but if she's into it all good. Just make sure you have a lot of skin to skin time at home and let her feed often and all that. I'm sure you know. 13 names, bloody hell. I have to say WG JJ saying she was able to move around with the monitoring must be encouraging for you. Sorry about shouty staff. Just buzz and ask them could they keep it down. Sleep is a bit necessary for helping you sort the milk out.

Trace I wish i had your conflict phobia. Sorry about the CPN, do you feel you need time off work? I don't know, to me that just feels like the opposite of what you need.

Speaking of conflict, DH and I had a big 'row' today. He was on the phone to a friend back home and was telling him I was going to train as a Doula. His friend asked what that was and was making jokes saying it sounded like houla hoop, or something. Anyway, DH said I don't know and called out to me jovially, "what is a Doula". Through gritted teeth I said it a birth support, but I was seething as he knows full well what a Doula is, but instead of showing it means anything to him by knowing what it is he went along with the joking and pretended he didn't know. As if knowing what it was would make him seem soft or something. I know I'm not making sense here, but its a bit of a theme with DH whenever someone makes sexist remarks he doesn't agree or even laugh but let's them slide. I feel by letting them slide and not disagreeing with them, he is condoning the remarks. Does that make sense.

Just reread that it doesn't make any sense but I know what I mean. I think I need to just go cuddle my sweet boys and go to sleep.

On one positive note, I am very proud of DS1 he went up a level at swimming, and ahead if others who started the same time. He was so chuffed with himself. Pubie, heres to our clever swimmy boys.

Night night.

Trace: when do you see the consultant? Thinking of you and your lovely girls - the fact that DD1 is doing well only proves that you are a Top Mum (of course we knew this already :) ).

effie - next Thurs 27th. Thanks
vag it did make sense. I know that would irk me too - but it's about time your dh had a fault! Well done AK and Rubesboy on the swimming.

Vag: are you doing ok with the new fitness regime? Eating enough? (peers over glasses). You seem a little anxious if that's the right word - a state of mind inevitably associated with not enough grub for me (which could explain a lot). But you know all this being a seasoned athletic type. Do take care of yourself.

trace - cross posted. Sorry you are not feeling your best, hope it all goes well next thurs.

vag - that would have me fuming. Well done on the swimming! Find it frustrating with my two. DD is just not convinced by the whole thing. As she puts it, she doesn't want to be a swimmer, she wants to be a ballerina.

V late about to go to bed as DP takes over colicky baby shift for a couple of hours but just wanted to say hello to JJ and well done! Really hope the feeding goes well and you can get back to your lovely home and family tomorrow.

Proper catch up tomorrow.

Oh and ZJ no stitches this time and much better recovery - had 2nd degree and stitches last time and had to do the whole sitting on a cushion thing for ages.

Oh JJ hope you get home soon and that DD2 cracks in with the booby juice.

Vag every right to be narked but Effie is right, you ok?

Trace my love you are just needing a bit more support for a wee while that's ok don't beat yourself up.

Must go to bed. Have to get shmoo poo to the vets for 8 and DS1 to nursery and DS2 to gymbore all by 9.30 oh and remember to shower, eat make lunches......

JJ - nice to hear from you! Wow you have a lot of names there on your list! I'd be so! I bet she's really cute. Did dd1 actually lick her then? Can't wait to see photo's - got any on the phone? Sending some positive vibes for you both to get the heck out of there (know how that is) All I had to do was pee about 2 litres for them - I necked a 2l bottle of water so fast, then begged dh to pee in my pot(he didn't as I shortly there after peed like a race horse) but it's awful when you just want to get home. I bet she'll be feeding for England and you'll be out in a jiffy. I'm sure you have loads of mini dd clothes but I still have some that will be too small for minilady2 even now and I'd happily send them to you if you want, just let me know.

Vag, that'd piss me off too. Just a guy macho loss of face thing kicking in. I hope you are right about the mirrors, I did go to a second shop and didn't think it was as bad, but even so, it was still shocking, you know when you can see behind as there are mirrors at all angles, and I also get to check how bad my hair is from the back too - no not Zara, it was Next. I've already learnt a nasty lesson about Zara and hardly ever try on in there Well done Vagboy1 with the swimming - must be the Aussie blood

Trace see above - you are so kind, and yes there are quite a few rolls and dents that need to go away and I will be turning that PS3 on without fail. No missed workouts anymore. Those vitual wourkout games really kick your butt don't they! I had a little bitch to dh about my "teacher arm / bingo wings" which have been the most alarming thing and what has got me most upset recently. You know, you always would expect to have tummy rolls after a baby and I totally accept that since my gut was stretched the size of Texas, but I don't accept the exceptionally beefy triceps that snuck up on me - so I said to dh I really need to cut down on the portions in the day and stop eating ds's leftover meals and he said "no you just need to do longer workouts / more exercise if you want to lose more weight" and I flipped, and I explained to him how it practically takes an act of God to get both children asleep or quiet at the same time for long enough to carry out my PS3 Active workout 4 x a week! - then he felt bad and tried to squirm out of it by saying "he knows that, and meant when he finishes building my new bike and buy the trailer I can then get out on it WITH the kids and burn more calories if it bothers me" (you see he is a bit strange and although I'm thinking he surely must not love fat on women - he never says anything even close to that, and has often said what turns him off most about me, IS my obsession with fat etc I really need to just cut down the cheerfulness no doubt

Hope Thurs goes well trace.

PD - yep most Fri's are doable. I usually have toddler group but will happily ditch that in favour of a Poison meet up I'm sure we could rustle up ladyT and the princesses for little meet up too if nobody else is keen. Do you drive? I have a feeling not, but the other option is you'd be welcome to come to mine, however I have no idea where you are and have a feeling it's Essex? If so bring Jam and tribe

Jam, thinking of you and Louis. hope all goes really really well and better than you fear. Sending healthy doggy vibes to you x

This is going to be sooper quick as I have been out all day so will catch up properly in the morrer, but:

JJ, really really hope you get out soon. In fact I have plenty of littley togs (many from Rubes!) as my DD2 was the same weight as yours. Will send some. Love to you both and really really hoping you get out soon. And listen, just call her all the 16 names!

Yes, Rubes, you are right, I can do a Friday and I believe Avo can do Fridays too. Hope you had a smashing day with DH. Sorry he was out of luck last night, I did laugh.

Jam, by contrast DP was in luck - maybe it was the matching undies! Listen, thinking of you tomorrow and everything crossed for the poor dear pooch.

Trace - please don't be down on yourself, my love. There are bound to be wibbles. I am sure the general trajectory is on the way up

Oh gosh, need to go so will fill in the other bits tomorrow xxx

Hi all,
jj don't think I have said congrats on here, only on facebook! Hope you get out soon and all is ok. 6lb 10 is the same as Eddie (1wk overdue), blimey she would have been big if she'd gone much longer! Cannot wait to see her.

rubes i also laughed a lot at your DH being out of luck. Will be interested how you get on with that new pill.

trace I agree with Effie. You are super dooper.

zj how lovely is your little DD. Such a caring little character already. My charmer would probably have hit them over the head with a train and shouted "MIIINNNNNE".

wg are you going to try and get them to say you don't need to be continuously monitored? Maybe you could try speaking to someone else who might sign it off? As you know I had the same problems. They apparently have mobile wireless monitors in Cambridge, but this time they told me that these mysterious monitors have been out of service for some time. But could you ask if they have similar? I had the monitor on, but they agreed not to put it on til I was in established labour, by which time I didn't want to move much. I didn't spend hardly any time on the bed and they were quite sympathetic to me wanting to move around, though they were obsessed with me being tired and tried to persuade me to be on the bed at one point. I then proceeded to go to the loo and decided it hurt less when I was standing up, i don't think they were that impressed but I don't think it was because on the bed was easier for them from a moving about point of view. Also I had to constantly go to the loo and so I was always being unhooked from the monitor, which was a bit annoying but not too bad. vag I don't see how monitoring really helps re scar rupture either. I think they would wire everyone up for monitoring if they could think of an excuse though.

beans how are you doing? How is your Dad?

jam hope your dog gets on ok at the vets. Poor dog.

Oh and of course, thanks spot for the fab birth story.

DD is still being a bit random sleep wise though she is now having longer daytime naps (usually in car seat, pram, etc). She is an absolute pain in the arse to settle in the evening though, every evening she will settle around 7:30 and then without fail she wakes about 45 mins later and repeat, usually with her being really hard to settle at all from then on, but usually with the 45 mins wake up again. Night before last I had to sleep with her, last night I had to let her sleep next to me for 30 mins and then transfer her to bed. But either way she usually doesn't go to sleep properly until my bedtime. It's so annoying! Any ideas? DH wants to try a bottle of formula to see if it helps fill her up and make her sleep deeply and hopefully longer so she doesn't wake at night so early. Controversial I know. He tried at 10pm last night but she was unimpressed with the bottle as I had just breastfed her. Or I could try solids I suppose (she is 5 months, but doesn't really seem interested to me) in the hope she might sleep deeper and settle better. I should add that by 10pm last night she was hungryish but I don't think she is not settling cos she's starving hungry (we had that last month and it was different!), it's more cos she's woken up and is excited at life and doesn't go back, and then ends up overtired. Just that maybe formula/food might make her more full and sleepy. What do you think? I know this is controversial and I would never dare ask it on the wider mumsnet!

Cripes - I go away for a few days and the thread goes mad!

JJ - congrats! How lovely!

I haven't a hope in catching up on everything. Sorry!

Summer - I started giving both DDs formula at 10.30pm from about 3 months old and I do think it helped for mine. It doesn't for everyone, I know, but it did seem to here. And I weaned DD2 at just 5 months as she was getting hungry. Initially wasn't v interested, but now guzzles happily. I only did babyrice for about 2 days then moved onto fruit and veg and now meat, and she hasn't looked back. Can't believe she's 7 months this week and I am starting to do slightly more lumpy food. She's not that happy with it yet!!!

Dad ok. Radiotherapy starting on 2nd Feb, so we're going out for his bday tomorrow night. He is pretty shattered by it all and is getting v worked up and stressed about the smallest things. It's his way of showing his frustration.

Sorry not to do more personals. I always find after I've had a break that I need to take my time to have a read and digest to catch up. Will get back on it soon.

x

summer I'd see no harm in giving formula a go - and no-one on here wears judgey-pants. It's just one of those things where the baby is so unique she'll do what she wants I think! DD2 fed 2 hourly day and night for months and months - when we weaned her it didn't make a scrap of difference to her sleep. She first slept through at about 16 months, so that must have been her personal target! But others I know have found that formula/food made a real difference, so I think it's a suck-it-and-see one (literally for dd!)
beans is very quiet. Hope all is ok.

x-posted Beans. Good to hear you're ok

Summer, as you may remember dd has been on FF's since about 2 months old and it did make a difference, but then again she wasn't getting much milk in general so perhaps that was why! No, but F sit's in tummy longer so might well help. She started solids last week as she still won't take as much milk in the day aas she would at night, so trying to reverse that and she seems to quite like it. Just once a day at first and now up to 3 for the last 2 days but she still needs to work on her technique! it's made a difference in that she want's less milk at night. Re settleing, dd is fine at bedtime but we did leave her a little unless she did a full bllown cry. She mainly did a little bit of whining but it was really more a "trying to settle herself" sounding type of cry, and asleep by about 5-10 mins of that. She sometimes still cries a little, but sometimes not at all and never longer than 10 mins really, fortunately she's very good. Now just gotta convince her that milk is not necessary at 3am so hoping the puree's will do that!
Beans, so glad your dad and family are feeling better and going to go out still.

DS much much better today. Still got today of A/B's to finish, but back to his normal self and not waking again thank God, but this weather is awful, and dh has the car so not walking in the rain to toddler grooup, but unfortuantely that means going stir crazy at home

Rubes I'm glad DS is better, its nice when you see their normal self come back again.

SL I've got no experience of this really so no help. Some friends have found it helps, some not so much. Either way at 5 months it can't hurt to try. However, 2 things I'm not sure night time is the best time to try a bottle for the first time, maybe have a go in the day first. Two, I think you really need to be the one who wants to do it not DH. I dont mean that is a scary feminist you shouldn't be forced by a man to do something, I mean, it'll only work if you are commited to it. The boys both refused bottles and while I'd like to think it was my amazing boobs that they refused to relentlessly, I think it was more to do with my lack of commitment to the cause.

I will say that its generally believed these days that its more awareness that keeps them up at night not hunger, and I tend to agree being that I've done the early weaning thing with disastrous consequences with DS1. If you want to see if it is hunger though I would go for formula first I over weaning, you could always try mixing it with some ebm first to get her used to the taste.

Beans thinking of your dad sweetie, how are you holding up?

Jam how are you guys?

Oh I forgot to say that she USED to take a bottle easily so hopefully she will take it and she has also had formula before (but just when I have been out not as a regular thing) so I don't know why I don't just try it! I think the only thing is I am slightly worried about affecting my supply as when she ended up hungry and feeding all evening it was after a couple of nights where she had had a bottle of formula while I had been out. But I think this was just coincidence!

She just fell asleep by herself at toddler group in her car seat. This is a miracle so maybe she will learn to settle herself back in the evenings naturally. rubes I have tried leaving her when she wakes but she just gets furious and you can tell she isn't going to settle easily back to sleep.

Oh SL - it's hard work when they won't settle themselves - poor you. I agree with Vag re trying the bottle for the first time in a while in the evening. A friend of mine found that if she let her little girl play with the bottle for a while every day for a few days, she eventually got it into her mouth and got the hang of it. The other thing to do is express maybe and give her a bottle of BM, then you can see how much she's getting and know that she's ok in the night, IYSWIM? Or perhaps you've already tried it.

Vag - thanks so much for your concern. We're all bearing up pretty well, which is good. Not a lot can be done about it until the treatment starts. He's most worried that he won't be able to play golf again, as that is his life really! I just had an email from Mum saying that the tumour is really growing fast and Dad's getting v worried, so I think he is going to push for the RT to start a bit sooner than 2nd Feb. I hope they comply. All a bit horrible really. I sometimes feel totally floored by it, if you know what I mean. There's just nothing I can do to help and I want to make it better!!!

Ah summer it is so hard when they are little. FWIW I tried ds on a bottle of formula at night as I had a couple of friends who swore by it. He was a bottle refuser and if he was persuaded to take some it made no difference at all. However, by 6 months he had started sleeping through by himself. Dd still doesn't sleep anywhere near through the night so clearly nothing to do with solids or bf or anything else! She had the odd nighttime bottle too, she did seem to do a longer stretch after that but she wouldn't actually go to sleep after it so even if dh gave the bottle so I could sleep I still had to get up and give her literally 30 seconds at the breast to go to sleep! Complicated child.

It will come though, I know it seems like forever but one day she will just start dropping off by herself.

Jj hope you've had some good feeds and are home :)

DD telling me to stop, bye!

Hey there, first off thank you v much for the cards, SL and ZJ .

Jam I am very sorry to hear about your dog, it must be heartbreaking. I remember the trauma our household went through when our cat was very ill, and I think dogs are even more like a part of the family.

BEans it must be so hard to feel so powerless about your dad. I really hope he manages to get the RT moved forward. Am thinking of you.

WG how was the luxury mini break?

Glad DS is on the mend, Rubes, though I feel for you being stuck at home with the littlies. When I get my mojo back I will def be along to bother you again!

Poor lil DS2 has such bad wind, he's up screaming all evening until about 2am when he conks out from exhaustion. It's a real deja vu from T when he was little. We're switching him back to regular formula from the comfort stuff as he's so bunged up (even though it's mean to help with constipation and wind) to see if it makes a difference. Might have to wheel out the white noise again. I guess I'd hoped this one might be easier, but I think I must just pop em out with incomplete digestive systems and upper tubes! Maybe it's the fast labours...

On another tack, does anyone know any nice villages in Essex? Just speculating, but might be a good option for closeness to London, rural lifestyle and greater proximity to my mum. I am so flaky about this location thing, I know it.

Vag what's the deal with the new gaff?

Oh and ZJ your DD sounds so lovely, I wish she was at T's nursery.

Oh and when do they begin to differentiate night from day? I can't wake DS2 up at all in the day, however hard I try, meaning he's up screaming all night anyway. Daytime, he just wakes, feeds, then immediately zzzs again.

Hi Ladies, Effie your very sweet, I think this weather and light etc is annoying me I think, the gym is def helping the days I go to the gym I'm in an almost 'normal' mood. I def don't feel myself lately though. Little things are annoying me more than they should. Hence my behaviour on FB I think. Also I need a holiday I think, a proper one. This whole deal with waiting for DHs brother to sort out his wedding day is really starting to be annoying. We have literally been on hold as far a big holidays go for well over a year. We had that week camping in July and London and thats it. Anyhow, we are booking a week at a villa in Bordeaux with some friends for the first week in August so that will be nice. Though a long way off.

SL early on anything other than demand feeding only has an effect on your milk, so expressing, top ups etc even just once can mess things up, but I would imagine at 5 months you might be ok as its around this time babies are starting solids etc so they aren't exclusive. Basically I think if you give it go but it doesn't make a difference you could always go back. How are the day time naps.

Spot, both my boys came out seeming to know the difference between night and day not sure how. I remember hearing a HV tell another mum that if you leave them overnight they soon learn that waking up is "boring" so they won't wake after a while. It was all I could do to not snort with laughter. I'm sure if ds2 woke overnight and was ignored he would think, "oh well this is boring think I'll go back to sleep". No he would "f#@k this for a joke, ima gonna scream til those biatches hear me". I think it was Beans who told me the 90 minute rule, so 90 mins after waking I'd put DS2 back to sleep, and so on through the day, then bizzarely at 6.30pm he would go down and only wake for his feeds until the morning. But I think this only works if he will actually stay asleep.

SPot I know a lovely village in Essex! Am sure Effie and PD do too. Come join the Essex massive.

Sorry you are having troublesome nights. I would say quick labor may have something to do with it. Maybe see a cranial osteopath. Great charity run one in London that we used wtih DS1.

SL why dont you try giving her the formula bottle when she is half asleep like a dream feed then she might not be so aware of not being boob. And hey not controversial atall, whatever works gets my vote!

Beans sorry to hear your Dad thinks the growth is bigger sending you lots of love.

Been a bit pooch obsessed today. He is home my wallet is minus nearly 400 squid. Really hope it isnt anything sinister as am not sure our wallets can accomodate spending that amount on him too often. Bread and water for the next few weeks.

Vagooli I can totally relate to that. The fact that we have a holiday home coming up in a few short weeks is what is keeping me sane I'd say. I'm still miserable at times and ds being sick all week didn't help at all.
I thought you were going to book a holiday and not wait around for your bil? Bordeaux sounds nice for obvious reasons! it's hard living away from family though and not helped by someone messing up your ability to make plans.

Spot not sure but I do remember thinking dd quite early on that dd worked out when to sleep as I mentioned it to dh and asked him how the heck they figure that out. How old is ds2 now? I've totally lost track. Gosh it sounds like you have a hard time with these littles of yours. DD still waking for one (usually) but sometimes 2 feeds, however the whole thing is about a 60 sec exercise and we haven't burped her even in ages, so am quite aware I got lucky. DS slept through at this age so I'm just hoping dd isn't far behind him. the difference is, I NEVER had this problem with ds (that is dd is hard to get all her milk quota down in the day so I know if she did, she would not wake at night for any - she's a week shy of 6 months now) I think the solids are definitely helping as she slept longer between feeding last night and then only wanted half her usual bottle she has at night. probably take her a few days though I reckon to turn it around.

Got really annoyed with my workout on the PS today - it was buggering up and wouldn't recognise some movements and I was stuck in a squat position for about 5 mins (not actually me obviously but the lady who is me on the screen!) and I had to skip over the exercise in the end to get her up! it was quite funny though as the trainer even kept saying "it looks like you are stuck, just take your time and copy my movements" and I was screaming at the tv "I am I am" will get dh to check it out I think. She was still squatting so I went and had a look at Face Book for a good 10 mins while she held the squat!