Dec 2007 - Little People, Large Strops

[strandedatseasonsgreetings]

Will this do everyone?

Clairey - am extremely impressed with your dd's reading. Dd1 is the best reader in her year and she certainly isn't reading Roald Dahl (although she might be capable of working her way through one, but certainly not in 2 days!). I am definitely of the opinion that the more you read, the more interest your dc's are likely to have in reading.

No more news on my friend - just keeping my fingers crossed they have caught it early enough.

BT - what you describe sounds relatively normal to me, certainly dd2 will ignore me until I slip the word "chocolate" in and suddenly she's all ears!! I think it's just another annoying 3-yr-old habit, but it's aways worth checking with the professionals if you are concerned.

Skidd - I will sponsor you too. Am still hoping to do it next year so will get you to sponsor me back (If I ever get round to it...)

I am on a bit of a health kick at the moment. Have a new bike and bike seat for dd2 and am really enjoying cycling around with her. Also really starting to watch my diet - not so much how much I eat but what I eat. And my latest thing is to try and have a more positive outlook on life. Was lying in bed this morning wondering how I could put a positive spin on the fact that dd1 was up before 6am yet again - but in the end we did all her reading and her sounds plus had a really good chat withouth the interuption from a still sleeping dd2 so it was a positive thing after all....

Am off on my two-night residential weekend introductory workshop for my course this weekend. Cannot wait!

BT - not sure I'm anything like knowledgeable enough to answer your question. DD1 had grommets put in after repeated ear infactions. This is fairly easy to check for - your GP should be able see if there is any scaring inside his ears.

In terms of her auditory processing disorder (which is a sensory processing disorder or SPD) this is a disorder of the vestibular (inner ear) which manifests itself as an inability to distinguish sounds in a noisy environment (e.g. swimming pool). She also has very poor balance which is closely related. She is a lot better after exercise - this seems to stimulate the vestibular. If any of these are familiar then I'm happy to tell you some more - PM me!

Clara - weekend away sounds fab!

Clairey - I agree with BT! Regarding the reading, it would only be a cause for concern if you think she is getting bored at school and could be at risk of dis-engaging. If everything else is fine, the be proud of her! DD1 by the way was similarly reading Roald Dahl at 6, Harry Potter at 7, now at 9 reading The Hobbit, Black Beauty, Golden Compass etc - its such a fab thing for them to be able to do, I love it.

Skidd, I slipped on a polished wooden floor at a restaurant in Sydney - on my romantic weekend away :( Just put my arm out to stop fall and managed to fracture at the elbow. It doesn't take much! It's not in a cast thankfully and am due to start physio tomorrow. It is already starting to feel a little less painful.

I'm more worried that the books she is reading at home are too much for her iyswim, roald dahls are quite fast moving and dialogue based (with random words too!) and because she insists on reading in her head I'm not sure how much of it is taken in...still she keeps choosing them off the shelf and is able to tell me what happens so am guessing it's ok. Just her teacher told me they were being careful not to whizz her through the levels too quickly so I think maybe I shouldn't let her read them?

Buzzy the more you say about your dd1 the more I see myself as a child maybe it's an april 4th thing

Few emails back and forth with bloke, no suggestion of meeting yet.

Clara I like the sound of the positive thinking

Thanks for all the advice!

I am inclined too think it is just that he has selective hearing at times!

FO - I wouldn't worry your dd sounds exceptionally bright, I think it is important for her to let her choose for herself. The school should support this but there is the danger as already has been pointed out that she may get a little bored and frustrated - I had this issue myself at school, myself and another girl were both very well ahead the rest of the class in regards to maths and reading ability but we were often left to our own devices so the teacher could concentrate on the rest of the class and we both got bored! Not good!

Hi all! I typed a long post at lunch time today but when I went to post it a notice came up saying MN was down for 5 minutes... grrrr, big long post all lost... lets see how much I can remember...

Clairey, I was an early reader like your DD, at 6/7 I was reading CS Lewis and Roald Dahl and by 9/10 I was borrowing books from my Mum (I attempted Lord of the Rings at 10 but it terrified the S@*t out of me fairly early on so I gave it up). When re-reading these books at older ages I realise there was much I didn't understand in them first time around but it didn't stop me from enjoying them anyway. I would let your DD choose her own reading (for enjoyment) at home and let the school keep giving her the books which they feel will help her develop her understanding. WRT to her glasses, she'll look ever so cute and there is no longer the stigma about wearing glasses that there used to be (plus children's glasses are far nicer). Both my DSs wear them (although DS1 only for tv/reading/computer) and as far as I know they've not been teased for it.

On the subject of pills, I was taking Micronor after DD was born and had all sorts of problems with bleeding once I stopped BFing her. At first it was just spotting but eventually it became a full week's light bleeding everytime DH and I DTD I tried several other mini pills (including Cerazette which I felt really low whilst taking - I don't know if that was the pill, the bleeding getting me down or knock on effects from my Thyroid or not though). I am now on Microgynon and although I get heavier periods, spots, cramps and some moodyness, its worth it not to be constantly bleeding.

BT - DS sometimes doesn't listen, at times I have wondered if he has a hearing problem but he hears me if I whisper "would you like some chocolate?"

DS1 is just like this! At 3 I took him for a hearing test because I was so worried but all was fine and he was diagnosed with 'selective hearing' I took him to have his ears checked again a few weeks ago as he shouts most of the time but doesn't seem to realise he is shouting. The Doctor could find nothing wrong with his ears though and he can hear the word 'chocolate' from the other side of the (noisy) house - the GP said perhaps he was just a loud person...

It is worth getting DS checked though just to make sure and to set your mind at rest but hopefully it will be nothing!

Buzzy, interesting what you say about hearing, I have quite good hearing I think, I notice lots of small sounds etc but often struggle to pick out words when there is a lot of background noise. My balance and co-ordination are rubbish not great either. I wonder if its linked?

How is your elbow now? I hope it heals quickly! I chipped mine a few years ago (banged it hard on a glass, cut it open on the broken glass and, unbenkownst to me at the time, took a chip out of the end of it) and there is a little crater there instead of a point - like the tip of a volcano I always think I didn't have anything done for it, just the cut stitched up but it was sore for a fair while afterwards, not helped by the fact I have a talent for walking into things

Clara, I love the random things that LOs come out with! I was chatting to the ladies in the fabric shop in town last week when (at the top of her voice) DD announced "my bum is eating my knickers" and proceeded to wriggle about trying to pull them out...

Well thats as much as I can remember (and probably more than enough) ...

gosh poor you beckle re the pill. Tell your DH to get the snip - actually I reckon you are secretly harbouring a desire for a DC4 so maybe not quite yet! Makes me though how much we poor women suffer with contraception, pregnancy, labour etc and it is just accepted as part of life. If men had to go through all that you can be pretty sure things would be very different [steps daintily off feminist soapbox]

clairey - agree that it is really important to let DD choose her own books - fantastic she is so into it. I was talking to a friend with a DS in the year above my DD who hates reading and will do anything to get out of practising/homework. Made me realise how lucky I am am to have such an enthusiastic geek DD

clara - I am also into healthy living atm - do you think it's the beginning of our mid-life crisis? Have a great child-free weekend

buzzy - poor you, glad it's feeling better though

I don't think I'm quite ready for him to have the snip yet Skidd although I'm not convinced I want more DC either. The snip just sounds so final. Its one thing to decide you want no more, a whole other thing to know you're done! I will probably be ready for him to have it done once I've figured out what I'm going to do with the rest of my life, I've been a SAHM for 11 years now, the thought of change/uncertainty is scary!

Beckle - have you thought about training to be an antenatal teacher? Seriously, I am really enjoying it. Have just done the residential introductory weekend workshop and it was brilliant and so inspiring. I am so excited about being able to work for myself (eventually) and I love being around really positive, motivated people after spending so many years working with some really difficult people.

clara, that does sound really great. I remember the ante-natal class I went to with DD1 in someone's house in Chelsea. I think it was 3 saturdays plus one evening we went somewhere else who was a breast-feeding expert. The only reason we did private was the public ones were at 3pm in the afternoon or something equally silly so it was a stretch for me to get there even as I was working up to 2 weeks before she was born and impossible for the H. But I must admit I was glad we did go privately. I liked the teacher so much I almost hired her to be a doula! [Are you thinking about doing that training too at some point?] As it turned out though, when I did finally go to a couple of the public classes after I finished up work, they were very helpful too and it was a chance to see the midwives some more - and in fact one of those mid-wives convinced me to have a home birth :)

beckle, yes the poor hearing in noisy environments and poor balance are very definitely related. And the hearing issue is not picked up by the standard tests for hearing that an ENT does. I had it explained to me but I'm sure I haven't got it completely right - something about the inner ear vestibular is composed of some sort of gel type substance but in some people its too viscous and doesn't move around quite how it should. The up-side is that she doesn't suffer from motion-sickness, are you lucky in that respect too?

Clairey, April 4 always did seem to me quite an auspicious day to be born on!!

DD1 has another brother born last week in London. They've called him Tane. She's at home today with a fever so I've taken the day off too. She's upstairs now making a card for the baby. Her father also rather enigmatically said something like "hope you can meet him at the end of the year" so perhaps that means he's planning to come back for xmas.

Buzzy - that is really sweet, your DD1 making a card for her brother.
Has there been any more talk about her going to visit him over (our) summer?
The hearing thing interests me, I also have problems hearing/understanding people in noisy environment and I have crap balance. I have wondered if it might be down to dyspraxia (after reading some of the stuff on here and elsewhere about it). I also struggle remembering dates/times as well, always forgetting appointments or getting times wrong, stuff like that. Have always put it down to being clumsy/forgetful, tbh. Can't see the point of getting a proper diagnosis, though.

Stranded - I am seriously considering training as a breastfeeding counsellor but will have to wait until DC2 is a bit older. Perhaps next year!

I think you'd be great BT! Perhaps you and beckle could team up... :)

Not sure whether there's a linkage to forgetfulness BT! Probably no great benefit to getting diagnosed given you've obviously done pretty well in life without a label!! Having said that it has been hugely helpful for me to understand a little more about why DD1 struggled with a few things and not to get annoyed with her for things she can't really control. Doing exercise (actually its the moving around not the exercise per se) is really beneficial for her - despite the fact that she struggles with most sports. So doing things like swimming and horseriding has worked well.

No I don't think DD1 will be going to the UK this summer. I was thinking I'd perhaps have to take her next summer if nothing happened but it does sound like he's perhaps thinking of coming back here at xmas so that's good.

sorry I meant you and clara...

BT - if you are serious about it, the NCT are good at letting you be very flexible with your training - people bring babies to the tutorials etc and you can take "time out" if necessary. You have to learn to be very "relective" though - I am going to have to write an essay reflecting on my Birth Experiences, which includes creating some sort of "birth art" which is meant to help the creative process (it can just be your birth story though). I tried something out on my course, but related to my breastfeeding experiences instead of birth experiences - I drew a labyrinth and then wrote relevant words through it (eg Pain, Agony, Anger, Pain, Comfort, Help....etc) until I got to the centre where I was finally able to feed without it being total agony!!! Trouble is I found breastfeeding a lot more stressful and traumatic than birth so not sure if it will work or not.

Sorry Buzzy should have added, the DOULA thing is unlikely because you really have to be on call 24/7 and I can't really do that until the girls are a lot older. Plus I just don't think I would have it in me - there was a doula on our course and she was amazing, she just had this incredible calm aura about her. I would have hired her on the spot if I had been looking for one.

There are different types of doulas, there are some that support you before the birth, some that attend the birth and some that help after the birth.
The post natal doula is something I would seriously look into doing, once the kids are both in school though.

I did a blog when I was pregnant with Daniel, and did my birth story with him on there!

I haven't continued the blog since he was 6mo but I will write my birth story for this one!

wow clara - sounds like you're really enjoying your course and it sounds fascinating. I'd love to 'reflect' on my birth experiences - it can be so traumatic and then you're immdiately thrust into parenthood with no time to process what has happened

BT - BF counsellor sounds like a great idea, and it could work well around the DC

buzzy - that must be wierd for you that your X has a baby, and your DD has a brother but he's so far away. How do you feel about it? Glad DD is so excited about it though. How is your BF and his family?

A lot of the stuff you say about APD sounds really like my DS. I guess it would make sense that not processing auditory information efficiently might make social interaction extremely stressful. How did you get your DD diagnosed in the end? I also have real problems hearing when there's background noise, and get very irritable/stressed when there is TV/radio on in the background - so if that is his problem, I suppose he's got it from me . Why aren't any of my DC relaxed and laidback like my DH? (or dark skinned and exotic like me ??)

Hi Skidd, this is DD1's second brother from ex H so doesn't really worry me. I was always glad though that got in first with DD2 otherwise I might have been much more cut up about it. She is quite excited even though he's half a world away.

I believe there is quite a strong correlation between children on the autistic spectrum and children with APD. I'm not sure quite how it works though. DD1 does have some traits that I'd almost call "ASD-like" for example, she's still not great at playing with other children, really prefers to play alongside (at age 9). But which comes first?

And in fact I had her assessed by a specialist "learning therapist" who specialises in kids on the autistic spectrum so I guess that tells you something! I believe she could have gone on a waiting list to be assessed by the Special Education Service but their funding is limited and she isn't classified as "high needs" so it would have taken a while I'm sure. I think an audiologist can do a check and maybe also speech language therapists. You could maybe ask your GP? I just did a quick google seach and found this article which summarises a lot of what I've been told.

kidshealth.org/parent/medical/ears/central_auditory.html#

There is also a UK website designed to support families of children with APD. It's not very well designed but some of there resources on there are useful.

www.apduk.org/

Hello folks!

How is the elbow, Buzzy?

No news here :)

Hey BT, elbow is slowly improving. Still rather frustrating though as very weak.

News here is that "BF" and I have decided to be friends rather than GF and BF. Just wasn't quite working for me, although I did try very hard. Feel a bit sad in some ways but relieved in others because although I've tried not to admit it I think I've known for a while. We're still going to take the kids on a family holiday to the Cook Islands together in July but won't be sleeping together.

Very quiet on here, what's been happening with all of you? :)

Aww that's a shame, but you have at least gained a friend :)

Still nothing here and getting very fed up!!

We need to text and phone a few people before I can put the news on FB but look out for the song "Can't take my eyes off of you"

Have putting a song a day on my FB page you see...

Oooh BT ok, will look out for that song! How exciting, I hope the birth goes well for you.
Buzzy - sorry about BF but you know that it's for the best don't you, if you just "weren't that into him". Better to be single than with the wrong person, definitely!
Nothing much going on here - have zero time as after half term last week I only have this morning on my own this week as no playgroup on Thurs and am on rota duty on Friday so have been manically trying to get everything done this morning (not massively successfully as I haven't done the hoovering but blah).
Hope everyone else is A-OK!

Hoping baby is coming today!

Had a show and lots of cx this morning. Sadly labour has stalled, it is starting to get going again, but still not in established labour.
Went in bath after MWs had been and examined me (not dilated though), then had maccyD breakfast, then a nap, then a walk. Been stood up and also bouncing on my ball, desperately wanting to speed things up. Have TENS machine on and been sniffing my clary sage as well!

ooooh ooooh ooooh am very excited! Sounds like you are doing everything right, I can't offer much more advice other than nipple stimulation!!! Keep us posted.....Good luck! x

WOOHOO BT - I second Clara's nippling stimulation advice plus a bit of sex - how exciting - have an amazing birth and look forward to hearing your lovely news